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Old 11-28-2018, 09:33 AM
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Default Never Ending Goodbye

How do you handle this? The child and mom say goodbye/i love you a million times, even as we are walking away from the entyway and into the kitchen, she keeps yelling it back and takes forever to leave. The child gets upset because when mom finally leaves, he doesnt hear a goodbye back from her. He doesnt know when it ends. How can i get the mom to say one goodbye/i love and leave without seeming insensitive? Its making drop off way longer than it needs to be. Hes not upset at all during this transition until she has left and he doesnt get anymore goodbyes.
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Old 11-28-2018, 09:34 AM
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Buh-Bye outside.

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Old 11-28-2018, 12:05 PM
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I would send mom a quick text letting her know how the long drawn out goodbye is making her kid feel and then let her know that tomorrow she is to say one BIG goodbye and leave. Then the next morning I would announce “ok mom give johnny one big goodbye and be on your way.....ok bye mom”.....slam door in face. Ok maybe not that but you get the idea
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Old 11-28-2018, 12:14 PM
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I finally just had to try out the buh bye outside and it was kind of terrifying to me, the thought of having to actually explain it to dcm and what she’d say/the look she might have on her face so I just texted her a short explanation after she’d dropped off and left for work and told her we would start that night at pick up. She was causing the problems because she really wanted to talk so as she’s trying to have a 45 minute conversation with me about stupid stuff her kiddo is being a total terror trying to get her attention. In the text I just put it on her and said that he couldn’t handle the transition between her to me and me to her so we need to make it as quick and painless as possible.
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Old 11-28-2018, 12:18 PM
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This was the text I sent her, I saved it in my phone in case (when )I need it againBye bye outside method:
When dropping off text when you are on your way. I put sign in sheet outside. Tell child goodbye on my front porch (take as long as you’d like). Knock when you are ready. I open door and take child from you. I close door. You sign in and leave. To pick up it goes mainly the same. Text when you’re on the way. I put sign out sheet outside. I get child ready to go home. Knock when you are ready to receive child. I open door and send child out to you. I close door and you then sign out and leave. AT NO POINT does parent come into the house. Once I see that child is able to come and go easily with no behavior problems we can begin to try to go back to doing it inside again. If I see behavior problems arise again we will go back to doing it outside. Communication is still vital between parent and provider so if there’s anything that needs asked or discussed texting or calling is welcome!
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Old 11-28-2018, 01:08 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by littlefriends View Post
This was the text I sent her, I saved it in my phone in case (when )I need it againBye bye outside method:
When dropping off text when you are on your way. I put sign in sheet outside. Tell child goodbye on my front porch (take as long as you’d like). Knock when you are ready. I open door and take child from you. I close door. You sign in and leave. To pick up it goes mainly the same. Text when you’re on the way. I put sign out sheet outside. I get child ready to go home. Knock when you are ready to receive child. I open door and send child out to you. I close door and you then sign out and leave. AT NO POINT does parent come into the house. Once I see that child is able to come and go easily with no behavior problems we can begin to try to go back to doing it inside again. If I see behavior problems arise again we will go back to doing it outside. Communication is still vital between parent and provider so if there’s anything that needs asked or discussed texting or calling is welcome!
Looks perfect. How did she respond?
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Old 11-28-2018, 01:31 PM
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Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo View Post
Looks perfect. How did she respond?
Better than I thought she might, she wasn’t mad and said she understood but did question if it was “truly necessary to take it that far” to which I just explained that the way things were was just too hard on everybody and it needed to stop. It’s gone well so far, the kid comes right in and puts his stuff away now so I’m happy!
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Old 11-28-2018, 02:02 PM
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Thats what im worried about. That the parent will think its not that serious.
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Old 11-28-2018, 03:02 PM
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Thats what im worried about. That the parent will think its not that serious.
At the end of the day, though, it’s if YOU think it’s that serious-not her. In my situation I had just finally had enough of it.
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