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Old 08-27-2009, 06:26 AM
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Default Parents who spend NO time w/ baby

Just want to get other dcp opinions here. I have a one year old whose parents are home with their 3 1/2 year old for the entire week. The 3 years olds center is closed for cleaning. Anyway, they informed me they would be home for the week, but still bringing the one year old to me. (which is fine, I'm still getting paid). But today, both parents are taking the 3 year old to an aquarium. I just think this is awful that they refuse to bring the one year old too. I have brought my 3 children to this same aquarium at ages 1, 3 and 5, and all 3 of them had a fantastic time. Why do people have kids, when they really don't want to be with them???? I feel really bad for this baby. He is with me for 10 hours a day, every day, even when they are home and not working. I realize I'm getting paid, but if your not at work, keep your $25 bucks for the day, and spend some time with your kid. Besides, he was awful yesterday, and screamed for almost 2 hours, but because I thought the parents were at work, I didn't call them. I don't like calling parents out of work, I know they have obligations. However, if I knew they were home, I certainly would have called them to let them know what a bad day he was having. When my kids were in dc, if I got out of work early, the first thing I did was pick my kids up. They ran errands with me, went shopping with me, etc. I'm sick of parents complaining about their dcp, when basically their dcp are "raising" their children. Stop complaining, and start spending time with your kids. And when they grow up and don't know you and you don't know them, you can blame yourself, and I hope you're proud.
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Old 08-28-2009, 06:10 AM
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seashell seashell is offline
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Years ago when I owned a large center, I had a family of 3 children, all under 3 years old. Dad was a well respected heart Dr. Mom didn't work. The kids were in daycare 8 am - 6 pm EVERYDAY! Mom went shopping, to the spa . . . She always had stories of what she did during the day. I felt so sorry for the kids. I could see if mom was working, but lunch dates and shopping with friends? Very sad . . .

Maybe mom and dad just wanted one on one time with the 3yo? Babies do require so much more attention.
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Old 08-28-2009, 06:24 AM
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mac60 mac60 is offline
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I have a situation today that I don't understand. Family has a newborn, now about 2 1/2 mo old. Baby was born 7 weeks early. Doing fine. Mom is still on maternity leave, they bring the 2 1/2 yr old everyday.

Today they all show up to drop off 2 1/2 yr old. They are going 1 hour away to a dr appt for the infant in a nearby city. What I don't understand is.....why didn't you take your 2 1/2 yr old with you. He would of enjoyed spending the day with you both. The doctor appointment probably won't last but 10 to 15 minutes, and you give up being with your 2 yr old for the day? These are the types of situations I don't understand. As a mom myself who had kids in daycare 8 years, I never took a day off and didn't keep my children with me. I WANTED to be with them. What has happened in the past years that some parents no longer want to be with their children? That is what I don't get.
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Old 08-28-2009, 08:06 AM
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tymaboy tymaboy is offline Member
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I know some providers will not take kids if the parents are not at work & it is just common sense to let the provider know where to get a hold of you in case anything happened.

I know when my DS was young I also told the provider to call for anything that I would be there to pickup if anything. I always looked for reasons to be with him (but then I also worked 2 jobs at the time) I think alott of the parents now adays have kids as a novelty to show them off (or something) They dont want to do the parenting thing.
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Old 08-28-2009, 11:54 AM
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I guess the way I am looking at it is: if they really don't want to be with him, then he is better off with me anyway. Unfortunately, yesterday, he actually called me "mama". This breaks my heart. The dad is home again today, and of course the baby was dropped off at 7:15. By the way, their contract is for a start time of 7:30, but he keeps pushing up the drop off time a little each day. When he is at work, he doesn't have to be there until 8:30, and it's only a 25 minute drive. I do take other kids at 7:15, so I haven't said anything yet, but I usually stagger the drop off times when I can, to eliminate parents getting stuck in driveway behind eachother, or them blocking my husband in on his way out. When you have kids, every hour you get to spend with them means something, but I agree with the other dcp who said, there are some parents who have kids as a novelty. I can see spending one on one with the 3 year old. But, come on here. They are home with hime this whole week plus Monday of next week, and they have brought the little one to me everyday and he will be here again on Monday. I almost feel like calling in sick on Monday to force them to spend the day with him. Some people just shouldn't have kids.
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Old 08-28-2009, 12:01 PM
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GretasLittleFriends GretasLittleFriends is offline Member
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1st post, I could understand dropping the little one off to have some 1:1 time with the older child, but not all week. As far as going to the aquarium, I cannot say for sure. I guess it would depend on the younger child, but I agree and think he might enjoy it.

Mac60, I can understand the mother of the newborn dropping off the 2 1/2 yr old while she's on maternity leave. It gives her more bonding time with the newborn, also a 2 1/2 yr olds are typically a bundle of energy, and if the nb was early, mom may need some time to recoup, and they do say "nap when baby naps" maybe she can't do that with the older one home. As far as the Dr appt, I agree the 2yr old could have gone with.
Give a little love to a child, and you get a great deal back.
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Old 08-28-2009, 12:07 PM
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Liliya Liliya is offline
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Default I noticed that too,,,

A lot of selfish parents this days,makes me mad and very sad for kids.
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Old 08-28-2009, 02:26 PM
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mac60 mac60 is offline
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The newborn is 2 1/2 to 3 mo old. The mom actually went back to work while the baby was in the hospital, so she could go back on maternity leave when the baby comes home. So mom has had plenty of time to recoup. I know, everybody has different ideas. I guess this would be a boring world if we all thought alike. I would like to add, they are very good parents, and good clients, just sometimes I don't understand, that's all. Most importantly, the early arrival is doing just fine and shoule be coming here aroun 4 mo old. I saw him today and he is ting, 8 + pounds.
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Old 09-08-2009, 02:38 PM
Celeste252 Celeste252 is offline
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Default Parents who don't spend time with their children...

This is where I find news letters and family sharing opportunties to be a plus. Let me explain, I have three children of my own, I am a childcare provider, and stopped working to raise them. Although I provided care for other families, my goal was always to spend time with and to raise my own children. I took them every where with me and took everyone elses with me too, learning and education was the reason I did that. I would never push them off on someone else and miss out on the opportunity to show them the big world out there. Today they still say to me mommy remember when we went here or we did this. When I see their friends they say remember when you took us here and remember when we went there. My motive was to get them learning, and I wanted them to see the world that they would become a part of before in an eyes blank. Don't send your kids to spend their days and hours and minutes in the pressence of other people if you have the time and the ability to spend it with your own children, they will leave your nest soon enough; make memories, make the best of every opportunity; share it with your children and your family and someday they will share those things with you and you will be surprised at what they remember. Then share your stories with other families, inspire them, get them to see that spending time with a human being is more important than anything you might want to do because it's your free day, or your free time off. Make it happen spend time with your children, because when you don't someone else will, and they will have the memories that you gave away! Love your children give them your time.....
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Old 09-08-2009, 04:58 PM
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mrs.meg mrs.meg is offline
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I am having a problem with this, too. The mom of the boys I watch has only been working 1 day a week. She feels that if she is paying me, then I need to be caring for them. I resent it terribly, they live on the same road. She cannot do anything with her boys because they don't know how to act. She will keep the 4-yo, but never will keep the 2 year old because he is such a pain. I am currently looking for some more to keep so that I can go to a daily rate. She will not even work anything but a flex shift so that she can have her alone time. Her husband has tried and tried to get her to get a full time regular job. Before she brought them to me, they went to daycare and they went daily as well. When I worked with my oldest, I worked 4 days a week and on my day off I kept my daughter with me, I really didn't think of it as the babysitter was getting a "free day" I always thought that if they were good at caring for my child, they deserve a paid day off, too. She brings them at 8 am and thinks that since she keeps them at home from 7-8 am with her, that she is spending time with them. I am seriously thinking of finding another job from home, I am not really enjoying the child care business.

Last edited by Michael; 09-09-2009 at 01:59 AM.
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