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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Do You Think A Teenager Needs An iPhone Or Cell Phone?
daycare 09:14 AM 04-16-2012
GEEERRRRRR

So as some of you may know, I have 2 teens from my first marriage. My ex and I usually get a long very well and we have a very healthy relationship. That is until it comes down to one thing. Discipline and punishing our teens. He never does it and I always have to, so I am always that bad guy.

My 13, almost 14 year old daughter, has an Iphone that has unlimited access to EVERYTHING! Facebook, apps, texting, internet, and whatever else you can think of. I don't think this is ok.

I took the phone away, as a consequence of her not getting good grades and she cannot have it back until she improves her grades. I also took it away for back talking.

My ex- says she NEEDS to have that phone, because she walks to school. I never had one when i walked to school and I where I walked to school, people walked around with machine guns. I say NO, NO phone.

Question is, do you think that a teenager needs a phone to walk to school, or for any reason at all? I believe in old fashion GOOD COMMUNICATION.

Also, I have considered getting her a go-phone from walmart and giving her
that, just to shut him up
Reply
MyAngels 09:17 AM 04-16-2012
Personally, no I don't think it's a "need." More like a "want," a "convenience" and especially a "privilege" - one that has to be earned, which it doesn't sound like she's doing right now. JMHO of course.
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Blackcat31 09:19 AM 04-16-2012
I agree that she does not need it. If he has an issue with safety then I say get the Go-phone.
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daycare 09:22 AM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I agree that she does not need it. If he has an issue with safety then I say get the Go-phone.
Glad I am not the only one who see's it the way he does. I got the I hate you for the first time this weekend from her, followed by a mean note. I have been crying all weekend..... I could never tell someone I love I hate you.........EVER....
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wdmmom 09:23 AM 04-16-2012
Nope. My 16 year old doesnt have cell phone. It's a luxury...not a necessity.
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My3cents 09:26 AM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by daycare:
GEEERRRRRR

So as some of you may know, I have 2 teens from my first marriage. My ex and I usually get a long very well and we have a very healthy relationship. That is until it comes down to one thing. Discipline and punishing our teens. He never does it and I always have to, so I am always that bad guy.

My 13, almost 14 year old daughter, has an Iphone that has unlimited access to EVERYTHING! Facebook, apps, texting, internet, and whatever else you can think of. I don't think this is ok.

I took the phone away, as a consequence of her not getting good grades and she cannot have it back until she improves her grades. I also took it away for back talking.

My ex- says she NEEDS to have that phone, because she walks to school. I never had one when i walked to school and I where I walked to school, people walked around with machine guns. I say NO, NO phone.

Question is, do you think that a teenager needs a phone to walk to school, or for any reason at all? I believe in old fashion GOOD COMMUNICATION.

Also, I have considered getting her a go-phone from walmart and giving her
that, just to shut him up
I think its a personal decision. I like knowing that I can communicate with my 14 year old when I want. Part of her having the phone is that if I call she better answer her phone. We have taken it away for back talk. We have found that our daughter seems nervous when she doesn't have her phone and feel that we have made her that way. We are always asking her do you have your phone, make sure you take your phone. Safety. I don't feel a child at this age needs the phone with all the bells and whistles- that can come later when they have a job and can pay for that extra service themselves. Times have changed. Pay phones used to be on every block, now you they are like dinosaurs. It is a financial thing, personal opinion/value, and I am going to throw in safety. Can your kid's survive with out it.......yes, does it make the parents feel better that they have one.......yes. For you it sounds like a divorce issue and who can do what and say what.......a tug of war so to speak. hugs- My daughter does not have facebook and I am the meanest parent in the world- oh well.
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countrymom 09:27 AM 04-16-2012
I don't think they need one, now I will be getting one for my dd, but she will be in highschool in september. There are no payphones in the school, so if she needs to stay afterschool, then she needs to call me. We live in the county so she can't walk to school and there is a school bus, but if you stay for activities you need to find your own ride home. I just find it ridiculious when you see these kids walking around in the grocery store texting like crazy, seriously what do they have to talk about all the time.
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My3cents 09:29 AM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by daycare:
GEEERRRRRR

So as some of you may know, I have 2 teens from my first marriage. My ex and I usually get a long very well and we have a very healthy relationship. That is until it comes down to one thing. Discipline and punishing our teens. He never does it and I always have to, so I am always that bad guy.

My 13, almost 14 year old daughter, has an Iphone that has unlimited access to EVERYTHING! Facebook, apps, texting, internet, and whatever else you can think of. I don't think this is ok.

I took the phone away, as a consequence of her not getting good grades and she cannot have it back until she improves her grades. I also took it away for back talking.

My ex- says she NEEDS to have that phone, because she walks to school. I never had one when i walked to school and I where I walked to school, people walked around with machine guns. I say NO, NO phone.

Question is, do you think that a teenager needs a phone to walk to school, or for any reason at all? I believe in old fashion GOOD COMMUNICATION.

Also, I have considered getting her a go-phone from walmart and giving her
that, just to shut him up
wantd to add this........ easy fix. When the kids are with you, your rules apply, when they are with him, he makes the rules. Kids adapt easy to this. They have to do this when they go to school. Maybe having this thinking with the ex would help solve a lot of issues- bring it up as a way to make it better for your kids. Doesn't make you the meany, your rules are just different then what Dad says go's. It also gives him the option to do the same if he doesn't agree with something you do. best-
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SunshineMama 09:29 AM 04-16-2012
I didn't get my first cell phone until college.

That being said, I think that a cell phone can be a very useful tool for safety purposes, although your kids probably are thinking more along the lines of socializing.

If you are inclined to get one, try a pay ahead per minute phone, and see how they handle the responsibility. If they want more minutes they can "buy" more from you by doing extra chores around the house. I think all driving teens should have a reliable cell phone, so maybe a pay ahead phone now will help teach them responsibility for when they are driving???

An IPhone? No way. I JUST got an IPhone. Teens dont need one of those
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MarinaVanessa 09:31 AM 04-16-2012
I don't think that it's a need either and a Go-Phone is a great choice. You can even get one of those safety phones that only has 4 buttons and you pre-program it to dial only 4 phone numbers (one number per button). It also has a red button which calls 911.


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daycare 09:45 AM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
I don't think that it's a need either and a Go-Phone is a great choice. You can even get one of those safety phones that only has 4 buttons and you pre-program it to dial only 4 phone numbers (one number per button). It also has a red button which calls 911.

these are rad...This is what I will get....Thanks so much....
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graham.shellbell 09:49 AM 04-16-2012
I have 16 year old twin girls...they have phones but when they get in trouble I use parental controls...they can only have certain numbers they can call(just family)and 911..I also have data disabled on their phone but not sure if that can be done on an iphone..my girls don't have those and won't until they can pay for it themselves. It is amazing now days all the "needs" kids think they have.. I pull into the lot at school to pick up my kids from school and am blown away by the electronics they have and the cars they drive!!
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EntropyControlSpecialist 10:32 AM 04-16-2012
No. I sure don't. We adopted a teenager who is nearly 16. He does not have a cell phone.
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Meeko 10:46 AM 04-16-2012
Our daughters are 15 and 17 and only just got phones. They are simple flip phones. No texting and no data plan. Just calling and they need to be careful as we do not have unlimited service.

We like being able to contact them if we need to and them us...but they both know it's an item that may disappear if we so decide. It's not a right.
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daycare 11:02 AM 04-16-2012
I agree, there are no more pay phone on street corners like there used to be, but every single one of her friends has a cell phone and the school has a phone too. If she really needed to call me, she could use theirs.

I really don't have any reason to need to get in touch with my daughter, unless it was an emergency and then it would be done the old fashion way, which is that I would drive to where ever she is. I think that we are SO dependent of the convenience of cell phones, that it almost enables our communication with people at times.

I also don't feel that it makes my daughter any safer. Perfect example, unfortunately, a teen girl was kidnapped from her home where I live. Her cell phone was found on the side of the road about a mile from her home. So it didn't do anything for her.
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mema 11:09 AM 04-16-2012
I don't think they "need" it. If they need a ride or there's a change of their plans, the school has a phone or their friends house. Dh and I just upgraded to phones with internet. Wasn't something we needed either, but it is a lot faster than our computer sometimes, but we foot the bill. Ds is asking for a phone because all his buddies have one-he's 11. I told him no way. When he gets a job and can afford to help pay for it, then we'll talk. As for taking it away, darn right. It's not a necessity, so if they aren't doing what they are suppose to, privileges get taken.
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jojosmommy 11:15 AM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by daycare:
I agree, there are no more pay phone on street corners like there used to be, but every single one of her friends has a cell phone and the school has a phone too. If she really needed to call me, she could use theirs.

I really don't have any reason to need to get in touch with my daughter, unless it was an emergency and then it would be done the old fashion way, which is that I would drive to where ever she is. I think that we are SO dependent of the convenience of cell phones, that it almost enables our communication with people at times.

I also don't feel that it makes my daughter any safer. Perfect example, unfortunately, a teen girl was kidnapped from her home where I live. Her cell phone was found on the side of the road about a mile from her home. So it didn't do anything for her.
I agree 100%.
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SimpleMom 11:21 AM 04-16-2012
My teen has a basic phone with basic service just so we can reach eachother if needed. It's been a great thing. I wouldn't let her have an IPHONE just yet. If I did it would be monitored and screened, things like that....limits.

As for taking the phone away, I would do the same, but would let them use it if going to be out of the house and such, BUT i am clear that it's only to be used in an emergency and to contact me. It MUST ALWAYS be anwered if I call. I will and do check the usage/calls out on these occassions just to make sure the rules are followed---otherwise, no use next time. and on occassion I check emails/texts just to make sure all is good. They know this. I really don't have many problems with this system and it works wonders for a little leverage when I need it :P

We do talk about safety issues with cell phones/internet, etc. and it's continuous. That's what works for me and my hubby. I don't have to deal with an ex., but I would think that if it's a rule at your house, then that's that. Kids know what they can get away with and with whom they can get away with it---married or not. JMHO
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saved4always 11:23 AM 04-16-2012
I have a 17 year old and a 19 year old. The boys never had phones until they started going more places like outings with their youth group or after school things. And then the phone was only for MY peace of mind so they could let me know where they were, that they got somewhere safely, etc. It was a flip phone that had 100 minutes a month, no texting, and at first they shared the one phone since they were usually in the same place. A couple years ago, my husband and I each got a phone with a keyboard and we got the boys each one, also. Texting is an awesome way for us to keep in touch with them now so we have unlimited texting. We love it. That being said, we do not have a data plan on any of the phones so there are no games or internet access used on the phones. If they want i-phones or something similar, they will have to pay for that for themselves (and my older son does have an ipod touch that he bought himself). Our 10 year old daughter wants her own phone, but she won't get it until I need her to have it and then hers will also be very limited as her brothers were.
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saved4always 11:25 AM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
I don't think that it's a need either and a Go-Phone is a great choice. You can even get one of those safety phones that only has 4 buttons and you pre-program it to dial only 4 phone numbers (one number per button). It also has a red button which calls 911.

These are cool...this may be something to look at for my youngest when she is a little older and going places more with friends.
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renodeb 11:45 AM 04-16-2012
I have to admit that I was very resistent to my son needing/getting a cell phone at first. The first one he got was called a "migo" with 4 numbers programed into it. Then he had a couple hand me downs when we would upgrade. (with limitied axcess ofcourse). Through all this he proved himself to be very responsible with keeping it with him and not abusing the privlege. Within the last year he saved his own money up and bought an I phone. Still very responcible with it, we felt fine about him having it.
To be honest I like knowing he can call us if he needs to stay late at football practice or something. It does bring me some piece of mind to. Now if he had been irresponcible from the start the whole phone thing would of gone much diffrently.
I have a 9 (closer to ten year old) daughter and she has one to. (limitied axcess ofcourse) and is constantly loosing it around the house and its often not charged. Shes the one who will need to prove shes repsoncible enough with it. She just has a crappy hand me down which will suit her fine for a long time.
I think its a case by case thing. If taking the phone away is good currency then I say great. Afterall most teens are glued to there phone! My son knows that when he gets a job thatr he will have to pay a portion of his phone.
I agree with others, its really a personal choice thing.
Debbie
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Michael 11:52 AM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
I don't think that it's a need either and a Go-Phone is a great choice. You can even get one of those safety phones that only has 4 buttons and you pre-program it to dial only 4 phone numbers (one number per button). It also has a red button which calls 911.

I did get the FireFly for my daughter when she was 8 and the customer service was terrible. Could never get them on the phone so if you have a problem and can't their online webiste to help you, you're screwed. I use it as a paper weight now. She is 12 now and has an iPhone.
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Crazy8 11:57 AM 04-16-2012
I think any teen would be mortified to carry one of the above - so if you are looking for punishment that is definitely the way to go. She'd probably choose no cell phone over that!!

I don't usually consider myself a "young" parent but maybe on here I am. We are a pretty tech savvy family and I am glad my DD has a cell phone, not an iphone due to the cost though - we have 5 phones on our plan and 2 are iphones, its another $30/month to add another iphone!!!! But I like that its easy for me to contact her when she's out, when I am dropping her off at 2-3 hour outdoor practices I don't need to rely on a coach having a phone, etc. We are always changing carpooling so I need her to know who is picking up, etc. So many reasons I am just glad she has her phone and I get mad if she doesn't charge it. I do limit her "play" time on the phone/ipod touch/laptop - if I find she is hanging out on it too much and I take the ipod away as punishment.
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AnythingsPossible 12:15 PM 04-16-2012
My son has had a cell phone since he was 13. He has always been super involved in things, and I like him having the phone so I know what is going on and when he needs picked up and such. He is 15 now and we have never had issues with him using his phone innappropriately. He does not have internet access. He also knows that we can and will check his phone at any point. I don't think they need a phone, but depending on what they are involved in, for me, it brings peace of mind.
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Kaddidle Care 12:17 PM 04-16-2012
Where we live you're not allowed to have a cell phone in High School so even if the teen had it on the way to school, it would have to be put in the locker during the day. Enforcing this on the parent's end is crucial and easy enough to check through phone bill records.

Walking to school - there is safety in numbers. A phone offers little protection as by the time the call goes through, the deed is done. If your husband feels that strongly that it isn't safe enough for the child to walk to school, then drive her.

We gave our son a simple cell phone for his 16th birthday. No bells, no whistles, no texting. Just a phone for emergency. The only time he used it was when he stayed after for club to tell me it was over so he could be picked up.

This generation of teens can't seem to live without their phones and texting and frankly, I'm tired of people DYING because they have developed such a habit that they cannot drive without being attached to it. I can't tell you how many times I've had a car cross the line and head straight at me and when I look at the driver to see what is going on, I only see the top of their head because they are texting or dialing a phone.

So.. in answer to your question, does a teenager NEED a phone? No, they do not.
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MrsB 12:24 PM 04-16-2012
My 14 yr old daughter has a smart phone (not an iphone) but has everything an iphone has. At first I think it got a little out of hand, I felt like she would have panick attacks if she didnt have it. (As did I if it was dead and she was out and about). We had no restrictions on it mostly because I didnt see all the things that could go wrong on it! Then we had to real her back in and the cell phone usage.

1 we have parent controls - so I can set the time of which she can and can't make phone calls/texts. (except to me or emergency numbers that I specifiy)
2. we have family locator- i can see where she is on gps by the phone. I know of course she could leave it where it is supposed to be and then come back for it, but she also knows that she has to answer immediately when I call.
3. It is usually the first thing i take away when she acts up. Has REALLY helped behavior modification.
4. we have made it clear, the phone is mine, I have access to look at any messages, texts, FB posts if I so choose. She knows the more attitude I get from her, the more I feel the need to go snooping!
5. She is enrolled in an online homeschooling curriculum so we have it set up to where she hands me her phone at 9:30pm at night and she gets it back the next day when she has completed all her school work. As long as it is not abused, she gets it on the weekends and hands it back to me 930pm sunday night.
6. I still want to know exactly who she's with, exactly where she is, I still meet and talk to everyones parents and I want their phone numbers too!

Daycare-I think you are doing the right thing. Try not to take the "I hate you" personally. She loves you! I never said those things (out loud) when I was growing up either. Not because I didnt think them, but because I knew my dad would throw me through the window. Teens usually say that one because they know the way to break you down is to hurt your feelings and they have no other "ammo".One day she will thank you for giving her boundries and limitations! H****!
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Breezy 12:27 PM 04-16-2012
A cell phone, maybe. An IPhone or other smart phone no I don't think so at that age. I think that is something that should come when the child can have a job and pay for that phone. And definately not if grades are falling. We weren't allowed to have our phones out of our lockers in school either but kids always found a way to text all throughout class in their back packs and not looking.
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daycare 01:20 PM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by Kaddidle Care:
Where we live you're not allowed to have a cell phone in High School so even if the teen had it on the way to school, it would have to be put in the locker during the day. Enforcing this on the parent's end is crucial and easy enough to check through phone bill records.

Walking to school - there is safety in numbers. A phone offers little protection as by the time the call goes through, the deed is done. If your husband feels that strongly that it isn't safe enough for the child to walk to school, then drive her.

We gave our son a simple cell phone for his 16th birthday. No bells, no whistles, no texting. Just a phone for emergency. The only time he used it was when he stayed after for club to tell me it was over so he could be picked up.

This generation of teens can't seem to live without their phones and texting and frankly, I'm tired of people DYING because they have developed such a habit that they cannot drive without being attached to it. I can't tell you how many times I've had a car cross the line and head straight at me and when I look at the driver to see what is going on, I only see the top of their head because they are texting or dialing a phone.

So.. in answer to your question, does a teenager NEED a phone? No, they do not.


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daycare 01:22 PM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by MrsB:
My 14 yr old daughter has a smart phone (not an iphone) but has everything an iphone has. At first I think it got a little out of hand, I felt like she would have panick attacks if she didnt have it. (As did I if it was dead and she was out and about). We had no restrictions on it mostly because I didnt see all the things that could go wrong on it! Then we had to real her back in and the cell phone usage.

1 we have parent controls - so I can set the time of which she can and can't make phone calls/texts. (except to me or emergency numbers that I specifiy)
2. we have family locator- i can see where she is on gps by the phone. I know of course she could leave it where it is supposed to be and then come back for it, but she also knows that she has to answer immediately when I call.
3. It is usually the first thing i take away when she acts up. Has REALLY helped behavior modification.
4. we have made it clear, the phone is mine, I have access to look at any messages, texts, FB posts if I so choose. She knows the more attitude I get from her, the more I feel the need to go snooping!
5. She is enrolled in an online homeschooling curriculum so we have it set up to where she hands me her phone at 9:30pm at night and she gets it back the next day when she has completed all her school work. As long as it is not abused, she gets it on the weekends and hands it back to me 930pm sunday night.
6. I still want to know exactly who she's with, exactly where she is, I still meet and talk to everyones parents and I want their phone numbers too!

Daycare-I think you are doing the right thing. Try not to take the "I hate you" personally. She loves you! I never said those things (out loud) when I was growing up either. Not because I didnt think them, but because I knew my dad would throw me through the window. Teens usually say that one because they know the way to break you down is to hurt your feelings and they have no other "ammo".One day she will thank you for giving her boundries and limitations! H****!
thank you...I am right no board with your rules... I pretty much do the same thing, just slightly different.

Thank you for making me feel better. I spent all weekend crying....I don't know why I took it so personal..
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Blackcat31 01:30 PM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by daycare:
thank you...I am right no board with your rules... I pretty much do the same thing, just slightly different.

Thank you for making me feel better. I spent all weekend crying....I don't know why I took it so personal..
She said it because she knew it would get to you! Next time don't let her have that control! If she says she hates you tell her that is too bad because you love her. They hate that!

I also used to tell my DD when she said she hated me thank you because at least I knew I was doing something right then! LOL!

You know in your heart of hearts she doesn't mean it but words are all she has right now so she is going to use them. Just turn it around on her.
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daycare 01:34 PM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
She said it because she knew it would get to you! Next time don't let her have that control! If she says she hates you tell her that is too bad because you love her. They hate that!

I also used to tell my DD when she said she hated me thank you because at least I knew I was doing something right then! LOL!

You know in your heart of hearts she doesn't mean it but words are all she has right now so she is going to use them. Just turn it around on her.
lol I did tell her this: If you hate me, then that means I am doing my job as a parent. Because parenting means that you have to set rules, boundaries and guidelines. Thats why you are the kid and I am the parent. Kids don't know how to do that yet.

Then I got the ugly look .....lol

I will have to try what you said and say, the I love you one....
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Michael 03:00 PM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by MrsB:
3. It is usually the first thing i take away when she acts up. Has REALLY helped behavior modification.
Yes, big time leverage.
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daycare 03:16 PM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by Michael:
Yes, big time leverage.
can you tell my ex this....he seems to think that I am being over the top... I told him that taking the phone away was the least that I would do after sight over her grades and disrespectful attitude.

Last time I took it away, he went and got her a new one.....................gggeeeeerrrrrrrrr
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sharlan 04:29 PM 04-16-2012
Once again, you need to remind your ex that your daughter lives with you and as such needs to follow the FAMILY rules set forth by you and your current husband.

Your daughter has really been pushing the limits since school started this year. I would take the phone away and give her a phone without all the goodies on it until her attitude changes and her grades change.

I would keep taking the luxury phones that your ex buys until HE gets the message as well.

REMEMBER - YOUR HOUSE, YOUR RULES!
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MrsB 06:57 PM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by Michael:
Yes, big time leverage.
Yeah, I learned the hard way one time when I said okay, you can't go anywhere this weekend. She said okay and took it like a champ. No need to go anywhere when she can skype all her friends from home. Only took me once to learn that lesson!
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My3cents 10:50 AM 04-17-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
She said it because she knew it would get to you! Next time don't let her have that control! If she says she hates you tell her that is too bad because you love her. They hate that!

I also used to tell my DD when she said she hated me thank you because at least I knew I was doing something right then! LOL!

You know in your heart of hearts she doesn't mean it but words are all she has right now so she is going to use them. Just turn it around on her.
I also tell my daughter this, and tell her she is using strong words. It makes her think that maybe she should think before speaking out of hate, when she truly doesn't mean it.

I also agree with the poster that said take every phone your hubby gives her away until he gets the idea too- your house your rules- keep asking him to respect your differences.
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CheekyChick 12:28 PM 04-17-2012
For safety, I think all teens should have a phone. I would give it to her before school and take it back when she gets home.
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Unregistered 12:26 PM 01-24-2013
you guys are totally over protective!!! your daughter most likeley has a crush on a boy at school, and beleive me it is super hard to talk to your crush face to face. SO... just like i do, i text him! and if my mom ever took my phone away, we would loose contact and i would be really depressed. and i mean... seriously. if you are a teenage girl, you should defanetly have a phone by the age of 13.even with a phone, it is esier to bump up grades. with the dictionary apps, calculator, and the entire educational section of the app store. if you need to make an emergency call when your walking to school. say if you fell and hurt your leg or something. just saying everybody on here is WAY too over protective. seriously guys. put yourself in our shoes. if you have phones, we should have phones too. man ur kids must really be mad at you guys. all i have to say is thumbs down.
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daycare 10:26 PM 01-24-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
you guys are totally over protective!!! your daughter most likeley has a crush on a boy at school, and beleive me it is super hard to talk to your crush face to face. SO... just like i do, i text him! and if my mom ever took my phone away, we would loose contact and i would be really depressed. and i mean... seriously. if you are a teenage girl, you should defanetly have a phone by the age of 13.even with a phone, it is esier to bump up grades. with the dictionary apps, calculator, and the entire educational section of the app store. if you need to make an emergency call when your walking to school. say if you fell and hurt your leg or something. just saying everybody on here is WAY too over protective. seriously guys. put yourself in our shoes. if you have phones, we should have phones too. man ur kids must really be mad at you guys. all i have to say is thumbs down.
And who pays for your phone bill monthly ???
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My3cents 04:27 AM 01-25-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
And who pays for your phone bill monthly ???
That is the problem with kids today, they feel they should be entitled little adults.

This post is old- but it was funny to read again.

I feel a phone and a teen is the preference of the adult paying the bill.
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daycarediva 05:35 AM 01-25-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
you guys are totally over protective!!! your daughter most likeley has a crush on a boy at school, and beleive me it is super hard to talk to your crush face to face. SO... just like i do, i text him! and if my mom ever took my phone away, we would loose contact and i would be really depressed. and i mean... seriously. if you are a teenage girl, you should defanetly have a phone by the age of 13.even with a phone, it is esier to bump up grades. with the dictionary apps, calculator, and the entire educational section of the app store. if you need to make an emergency call when your walking to school. say if you fell and hurt your leg or something. just saying everybody on here is WAY too over protective. seriously guys. put yourself in our shoes. if you have phones, we should have phones too. man ur kids must really be mad at you guys. all i have to say is thumbs down.
http://www.d-e-f-i-n-i-t-e-l-y.com/

http://public.wsu.edu/~brians/errors/your.html

Thumbs down for your terrible grammar, punctuation and spelling.
Thumbs down for your entitled attitude.


I am 30, my daughter is 13. When *I* was 13, there were no cell phones, so if I had a 'crush' everyone actually used words and spoke face to face to communicate.

My 13yo has an iphone. I have limits on it (not at meals, off during school hours, no phone after 10). If her grades fall below 90%, she loses it until I see an improvement. That has never happened. She is in AP classes (taking 10th grade math & science in 8th grade), volunteers at an animal shelter and has an active social life.

She would NEVER dream of feeling entitled to have her phone. She bought and paid for it herself with money earned from doing odd jobs around the neighborhood, & babysitting. She pays for her phone's internet plan every month HERSELF.

I also drink alcohol when we go out to dinner, drive a car, all of those things my 13 yo cannot yet do. So, just because I have a cell phone does not mean that my daughter is ENTITLED to have one as well.
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daycare 05:42 AM 01-25-2013
Hahahah the girl fell into a trap!! Not the best place for a teen to voice her sense of entitlement. Hahah

I posted this thread long ago about my daughter. Who by the way. Still has a Go-phone. She can't pay the bill for her iPhone so it's collecting dust.
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Patches 06:00 AM 01-25-2013
Originally Posted by daycarediva:

I also drink alcohol when we go out to dinner, drive a car, .
and then what?

I had to reread this sentence a couple times because I kept thinking you were talking about drinking and driving and I was wondering, "why is she drinking and driving? And what does this have to do with teenagers having cell phones?"
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momofsix 06:04 AM 01-25-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
I posted this thread long ago about my daughter. Who by the way. Still has a Go-phone. She can't pay the bill for her iPhone so it's collecting dust.
Just an FYI, my 2 youngest (15 & 16) each have old hand-me-down iPhones They pay nothing monthly at all but still get wireless wherever they can find it for free (home, most stores/malls etc.) They also have a free texting app that allows texting just like if they had a plan. All for free! The only thing they can't do is talk
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itlw8 06:06 AM 01-25-2013
I would have said no but many home have no landline andkids are home with no phone. Many schools still say no phones.

Does she need an I phone ? no.a cellphone maybe.

Do you have a plan on HOW she can get her grades up? so did she lose the phone for back talk or low grades. the punishment should fit the crime and one you can stick too. back talk. weekend with no phone is reasonable if it is constant and not one time.



dang fell for the old post again
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seebachers 07:03 AM 01-25-2013
Hey Michael....can you come up with an award "You fell for the Old Post" icon. I don't know how many times I have done this. I think it would be funny to slap it up there when someone falls for it.
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Familycare71 05:45 AM 02-08-2013
We have a "grounded phone" for our teens- no camera- no querty keyboard- no wifi.
I do not allow my kids (9,15,16) to go out without their cell phone- I do see it as a safety issue- I feel better when they have it... I also like the fact that when my kids drive I can turn on GPS locater and find out where they are... I could also do this in an emergency if needed now...
I liked the idea that the punishments at your house stay at your house and dads rules apply there-
When my kids do the "I hate you" or "you don't care", etc... I tell them I have enough friends and so do they- when they are adults it can be diff but for now I'm mom only- sometimes my husband and I high five and say " yes!! We are doing it right!!" Lol. It may hurt but I know if my kids always think I rock I'm missing something!
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EntropyControlSpecialist 05:51 AM 02-08-2013
If that is your consequence for bad grades then I think it is perfectly fair.

Ex-husbands can be a huge pain in the butt sometimes when it comes to questioning perfectly logical rules.
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rmc20021 06:42 AM 02-08-2013
I am so glad I'm not the only 'bad' guy. I have custody of my grandson and granddaughter who are 16 and 9. They feel they should have phones and mom has snuck phones to them 3-4 different times to 'communicate' with them. She is only allowed supervised visits so I had to keep the rule of no phone.
It's hard when kids are teens and EVERYONE else has them. I feel that unless the kids are involved in a lot of activities where it may be necessary for them to contact you for pick ups etc then NO they do not NEED a phone.
I believe in those phones with the 4 numbers is the only way to go if a parent wants a teen to have a phone for those reasons. But to have unlimited access to EVERYTHING is asking for trouble.
Back when my own kids were at home my teen daughters had phones...and one of them ran up a bill of 3,000.00. That was when I went to a prepaid phone as I knew exactly what it would cost each month and there would be no surprises.
Kids can just get into toooooooo much trouble these days with that kind of access to the entire world. I noticed my other grandson's girlfriend has over 3,000 friends on her facebook. NOBODY has those kinds of friends and a lot of them are guys from other countries...she's 18.
So nope...no phones with all that access here.
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Michelle 08:40 AM 02-08-2013
My girls ages 17 and 20 have iphones and I have the family map program so that I can locate them at any time of the day..
We live in California and I am more worried about predators and the 600 registered sex offenders in our city alone.. so yup I am "one of those parents"
and I can relax more knowing they can call/text/fb me anytime they need me...(their schools allow phones)

Just Yesterday, I used it because she decided to eat lunch at school instead of at home, so I just "mapped" her and went on with my day
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allsmiles 08:59 AM 02-08-2013
my girls both have android phones and they are 11 and 14.. they are in alot of activitites and its makes communication alot more convenient, but they dont think for a moment that if their grades or their behavior is not up to par that they will continue to have the luxury of the phone.. NO WAY!!

their dad doesnt get a say because i pay the phone and the bill LOL
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Tags:cell phones, iphone
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