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  #1  
Old 10-05-2017, 01:45 AM
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Sweet pea Sweet pea is offline
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Default Bowel Obstruction/ Help Needed

Hi, I'm a first time poster, Long time lurker 😂
I have a nearly 4 year old dcb who is hard work, his mums even harder work!!! He isn't toilet trained, not even close, he will wee if you tell him to go toilet but will just wee in his pull up unless you tell him he has to go. BUT he has never had a solid poop it always quite thick and I can change him upto 6 times a day sometimes due to skids in the pull ups. He's really starting to smell, I was actually sick today at the smell.
I told mon to o take him drs as I think he has an obstruction and doesn't actually know when he needs to poo as it's overflow leaking.
Her reply ..... I'll give him some kiwi fruit that should work!!!!i told her no he needs to see a dr...... tonight I get a text off her saying how he has eaten 2 kiwis and it should do the trick 😡😡😡
She's totally not listening to me!!! Oh and I forgot to mention that as he ran out of pull ups today I had to use a swimpull up as my nappies were to small for him.... he sat on my knee and weed!! It went straight through and all over my pants nnleg. I told her this at pick up too and she said " awww did you leak baby" .... wtf if that was me as the parent I'd have been mortified and apologising !!
Really sorry for the long post but I really needed to vent and see if anyone else has troubles like these.
I've had dcb for 3 years and I think he's on the spectrum but mum just doesnt listen, as soon as I mention anything that's not positive she gets all defensive and not nice
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  #2  
Old 10-05-2017, 01:51 AM
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Here are some related threads that may help: https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.php?tag=constipation
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  #3  
Old 10-05-2017, 06:55 AM
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You may need to cut her loose. I am sorry but he can die from a bowel obstruction. If he is holding and starting to smell. I cannot stand parents that are too lazy to actually parent.If she refuses to take him to the dr you shouldn't be responsible.
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Old 10-05-2017, 07:18 AM
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Originally Posted by amberrose3dg View Post
You may need to cut her loose. I am sorry but he can die from a bowel obstruction. If he is holding and starting to smell. I cannot stand parents that are too lazy to actually parent.If she refuses to take him to the dr you shouldn't be responsible.
Exactly! You can't force a parent to parent but you can refuse services if you don't want to assume liability for her child. Poor kid.

Do you have services available like CPS (child protection services) that you could report to so that this little one receives some medical attention?
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Old 10-05-2017, 08:36 AM
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This is so terrible and painful for the child. He needs DR recommended solution or like others said he could die from a perforated colon.

I would let mom know that he is to see a DR due to your concerns and care will not take place until a diagnosis and treatment plan is in place by a DR. Failure to comply will result in termination of contract.
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Old 10-05-2017, 11:08 AM
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I agree with the others that a doctor is needed. I'd insist on the doctor appointment and I would tell Mom not to leave the office without an xray. Around here, getting an xray for a child in this situation is nearly impossible. When they get that xray, though, it shows obstruction.
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Old 10-05-2017, 12:51 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet pea View Post
Hi, I'm a first time poster, Long time lurker ��
I have a nearly 4 year old dcb who is hard work, his mums even harder work!!! He isn't toilet trained, not even close, he will wee if you tell him to go toilet but will just wee in his pull up unless you tell him he has to go. BUT he has never had a solid poop it always quite thick and I can change him upto 6 times a day sometimes due to skids in the pull ups. He's really starting to smell, I was actually sick today at the smell.
I told mon to o take him drs as I think he has an obstruction and doesn't actually know when he needs to poo as it's overflow leaking.
Her reply ..... I'll give him some kiwi fruit that should work!!!!i told her no he needs to see a dr...... tonight I get a text off her saying how he has eaten 2 kiwis and it should do the trick ������
She's totally not listening to me!!! Oh and I forgot to mention that as he ran out of pull ups today I had to use a swimpull up as my nappies were to small for him.... he sat on my knee and weed!! It went straight through and all over my pants nnleg. I told her this at pick up too and she said " awww did you leak baby" .... wtf if that was me as the parent I'd have been mortified and apologising !!
Really sorry for the long post but I really needed to vent and see if anyone else has troubles like these.
I've had dcb for 3 years and I think he's on the spectrum but mum just doesnt listen, as soon as I mention anything that's not positive she gets all defensive and not nice
Oh so not happening here... not only have him check for bowel obstruction, but get him tested for food allergies and refuse care until it's done. I had a child that ended up having several food allergies (they can cause intestinal issues), would block her up bad & then she was in misery for 2 days until poop came out. Once the foods were stopped, no issues. She aged out then I got baby brother last year... guess what, he started with same issues only one or 2 foods; stopped feeding him the foods, he's fine. He was tested & guess what? Same allergies (and it's writing from an allergist, not the normal PED)
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Old 10-05-2017, 01:07 PM
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Same mum turns up this morning with dcb in pyjamas !!! He's miserable ( she says grumpy) and she has a load of fruit for him to eat today!!honestly I am wits she be with her. I feel my house and guidance is his only stable environment, she treats him like a baby and he in definitely a snowflake!
I'm dreading helping him get dressed as that smells gonna hit me in the face..... god I needs backbone
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Old 10-05-2017, 01:15 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet pea View Post
Same mum turns up this morning with dcb in pyjamas !!! He's miserable ( she says grumpy) and she has a load of fruit for him to eat today!!honestly I am wits she be with her. I feel my house and guidance is his only stable environment, she treats him like a baby and he in definitely a snowflake!
I'm dreading helping him get dressed as that smells gonna hit me in the face..... god I needs backbone
Until you get your backbone use email or text. This helped me tremendously when I first started and hated face to face confrontations!
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  #10  
Old 10-05-2017, 01:27 PM
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Thanks fir the advice re text.... dcb is screaming in horror at getting himself dressed!! So I text dcm and said " he cannot dress himself and is having a meltdown. In future he is to come fully dressed and in a fresh pull up
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Old 10-05-2017, 01:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet pea View Post
Same mum turns up this morning with dcb in pyjamas !!! He's miserable ( she says grumpy) and she has a load of fruit for him to eat today!!honestly I am wits she be with her. I feel my house and guidance is his only stable environment, she treats him like a baby and he in definitely a snowflake!
I'm dreading helping him get dressed as that smells gonna hit me in the face..... god I needs backbone
While this is commendable you need to understand that while providing a stable/safe environment for him you are only a temporary solution for a long term problem.

Requiring his parent to do what is best for him as her child (even if that means denying care for the day/week or even terminating) is a much better attempt at being part of the solution.

It's much like the old story about giving a man a fish and he eats for the day but teaching him how to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.
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  #12  
Old 10-10-2017, 11:03 AM
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The boy needs medical attention. The usual tricks simply do not work with some kids. I have a kid with serious life long bowel issues and even on medications it is tough to manage. He was blocked up so bad once we took him to ER. They did an enema and then another. That is not fun for anyone. He screamed as a fist sized poop came out. He was born with his issue and we got every treatment in the book and yet still issues. He has megacolon and has had to do many clean outs, and will be on meds forever. If we had done nothing, we might have ended up losing him! If she refuses to get him help and he has not had a bm in a week or more, even with help from remedies or meds, I would say thats a medical emergency. I would tell her take him in and when he has had a bm and with a dr note u can take him back but if she doesn't then he is no longer able to attend ur care.
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