Daycare.com Forum
Parents and Guardians Forum>How do I Ask This and if it Unreasonable
Unregistered 04:32 PM 05-24-2011
So my lo is 6 months old. He just started daycare about 2 weeks ago for only 3 days a week. She is an in home daycare and a very nice lady. My concern is that when I've fine to pick him up she has him in his car seat. Not like she has him ready to go, but a if that's where hes been for a while.i asked her if she needs a baby mat to let him lay under, or to help him practice sitting. She said oh she has one she just didn't think of that. So the next time I came he was being held, so I felt better. Then yesterday I went to get him and he's in hits car seat, with a bottle propped up on a blanket and the bottles empty. Ok now I'm pissed. But there was other moms there so I didn't wanna stay anything.
My worry is that he's in there alot, and he's not having time to lay or sit... And I'm very bad with bringing things up like this. I don't want her to feel like I don't think she knows what she's doing. Or that I'm one if those moms... But how should i approach this with out seeming rude or picky. Is it because she's got little toddlers to deal with too? Ill but whatever equipment she needs, its just the fact of saying something that's got me! Help!
My worry is that he's in there alot, and he's not having time to lay or sit... And I'm very bad with bringing things up like this. I don't want her to feel like I don't think she knows what she's doing. Or that I'm one if those moms... But how should i approach this with out seeming rude or picky. Is it because she's got little toddlers to deal with too? Ill but whatever equipment she needs, its just the fact of saying something that's got me! Help!
Ms. Stephanie 06:43 PM 05-24-2011
That is UNACCEPTABLE! How many children does she care for? I am also very confused as to why she would be putting her in her car seat? Does she not have proper infant equipment to put her in? A bouncy, swing, or jumpy?
Ms. Stephanie 06:44 PM 05-24-2011
I would definitely say something. could you take the car seat with you when you leave?
Unregistered 06:51 PM 05-24-2011
Ok... So how do I say it without coming across a if she doesn't know what shes doing.
WDW 07:02 PM 05-24-2011
Originally Posted by Ms. Stephanie:
I would definitely say something. could you take the car seat with you when you leave?
This was my suggestion. As a provider, I love when parents take the seats.. not because I use them during the day - I don't - but I don't have a ton of room to store them, and the kids play with them, etc. She can't put him there if she doesn't have it - however, you still have to say something because if she is putting him there for an extended period, she will find somewhere else to "store" him...I would definitely say something. could you take the car seat with you when you leave?
sharlan 07:06 PM 05-24-2011
Try leaving your carseat in the car, bring in the baby and his bag, only.
You may want to casually ask her how he spends his day.
You may want to casually ask her how he spends his day.
Cat Herder 05:14 AM 05-25-2011
Is your provider Registered/Licensed?
If so she knows, without a doubt, that is against the rules in a HUGE way.
That runs the risk of positional asphyxia; not even mentioning the developmental issues. Not good.
Just ask her. Carry the child in / Leave your car seat in your car. Please.
You may need to pull that child, so be prepared with a backup provider (you should always have one
).
If so she knows, without a doubt, that is against the rules in a HUGE way.
That runs the risk of positional asphyxia; not even mentioning the developmental issues. Not good.
Just ask her. Carry the child in / Leave your car seat in your car. Please.
You may need to pull that child, so be prepared with a backup provider (you should always have one
).
daysofelijah 05:52 AM 05-25-2011
Take the seat with you and kindly ask she not prop the bottle to feed the baby. Licensed providers are specifically instructed that they are not allowed to prop the bottle to feed the baby, at least here anway.
jen 06:47 AM 05-25-2011
I have to be honest here...
I would just find another provider. She may be a very nice lady, but it doesn't really sound as though she is meeting the needs of the child or following licensing rules. Either way, she should know better and, in my opinion, calls her judgement in to question.
I would just find another provider. She may be a very nice lady, but it doesn't really sound as though she is meeting the needs of the child or following licensing rules. Either way, she should know better and, in my opinion, calls her judgement in to question.
Live and Learn 06:49 AM 05-25-2011
Originally Posted by jen:
I have to be honest here...
I would just find another provider. She may be a very nice lady, but it doesn't really sound as though she is meeting the needs of the child or following licensing rules. Either way, she should know better and, in my opinion, calls her judgement in to question.
YupI have to be honest here...
I would just find another provider. She may be a very nice lady, but it doesn't really sound as though she is meeting the needs of the child or following licensing rules. Either way, she should know better and, in my opinion, calls her judgement in to question.
SilverSabre25 06:54 AM 05-25-2011
Originally Posted by jen:
I have to be honest here...
I would just find another provider. She may be a very nice lady, but it doesn't really sound as though she is meeting the needs of the child or following licensing rules. Either way, she should know better and, in my opinion, calls her judgement in to question.
I agree with this completely. Even if you take the car seat, talk to her about not propping the bottle, ask her to put him on the floor, etc, you have no way of confirming that she's not just stashing him somewhere for the whole day and doing all those things anyway, no matter what she says. She just doesn't sound like she ought to be caring for infants.I have to be honest here...
I would just find another provider. She may be a very nice lady, but it doesn't really sound as though she is meeting the needs of the child or following licensing rules. Either way, she should know better and, in my opinion, calls her judgement in to question.
Unregistered 07:41 AM 05-25-2011
I, too, would find a different provider. Leaving the baby in the car seat and propping the bottle are both unacceptable, in my opinion.
Mom_of_two 08:13 AM 05-25-2011
I am a provider, and mom of two little ones (I also used to work outside the home and my 3 year old was in daycare til she was 2.) I would most definitely find a different provider!! All of that is unacceptable, and dangerous!!
momma2girls 09:08 AM 05-25-2011
Originally Posted by Ms. Stephanie:
I would definitely say something. could you take the car seat with you when you leave?
This is what I was going to respond with. Also ask her if she has a bouncy seat, lay mat, bumbo,swing, jump a roo, etc.....I would definitely say something. could you take the car seat with you when you leave?
Blackcat31 09:14 AM 05-25-2011
In my state it is against licensing regs to leave a child in their car seat AND to prop a bottle. YOU are your child's voice. Speak up. Ask your provider what she does with your child during the day; if possible, drop in at varying times and check. Also as others have said, take your car seat with you. Have your provider show you the infant items she has and how she uses them with your child. I would take advantage of the open door policy most providers have and use it.
youretooloud 09:48 AM 05-25-2011
I think there are those crazy times where too many things are going on at once, and anybody would put the baby in a seat and maybe even prop a bottle... but, you've seen this more than once... so, I think she feels like this is acceptable, and even normal.
Unless actual chaos has just broken out, it isn't acceptable to put a baby in his or her carseat for any length of time. I'd also look for a new provider, she seems very nice, but I think she's not really as dedicated to this job as she should be. You could find someone who's more interested in doing the job correctly.
Unless actual chaos has just broken out, it isn't acceptable to put a baby in his or her carseat for any length of time. I'd also look for a new provider, she seems very nice, but I think she's not really as dedicated to this job as she should be. You could find someone who's more interested in doing the job correctly.
JenNJ 10:54 AM 05-25-2011
You need a new daycare arrangement. This one is not working out BC she is not able to tend to your child.
daycare 11:08 AM 05-25-2011
I have learned to never jump to conclusions and assume. Talk to the provider about it and see what she says first. It could be that she is putting the child in the car seat to get the child ready to go.
I used to do that so that it was not a long process at pick up time. As we all know when there is another adult figure in the house the kids go nuts. So I would put the baby in the car seat about 5 minutes before the child was to be picked up to speed up the pickup process.
After you talk to the provider and you still don't feel comfortable then i would take the child out.
I think that even if you take the car seat with you and the provider is not using it properly she will find something else to use in it's place. JMO
I used to do that so that it was not a long process at pick up time. As we all know when there is another adult figure in the house the kids go nuts. So I would put the baby in the car seat about 5 minutes before the child was to be picked up to speed up the pickup process.
After you talk to the provider and you still don't feel comfortable then i would take the child out.
I think that even if you take the car seat with you and the provider is not using it properly she will find something else to use in it's place. JMO
Unregistered 11:18 AM 05-25-2011
Originally Posted by jen:
I have to be honest here...
I would just find another provider. She may be a very nice lady, but it doesn't really sound as though she is meeting the needs of the child or following licensing rules. Either way, she should know better and, in my opinion, calls her judgement in to question.
I agree. Hopefully you have a backup in the meantime. I wouldn't leave your child there, even during the notice period. Sometimes friends will watch kids temporarily for free or maybe if you agree to switch babysitting for them on a weekend or something. Even with full time care, always be sure you have a backup on a moments notice for situations just like this.I have to be honest here...
I would just find another provider. She may be a very nice lady, but it doesn't really sound as though she is meeting the needs of the child or following licensing rules. Either way, she should know better and, in my opinion, calls her judgement in to question.
AnythingsPossible 02:38 PM 05-25-2011
Would it really be any better if the baby were in a bouncer or bumbo every time mom came for pick up?
OP-you may want to speak with the provider before you pull your child from care. maybe when you pick up is an extra crazy time of day. propping the bottle is a HUGE no, and if you decide to stay with her make it clear you don't want the bottle propped. but maybe she has the infant in the car seat at that time due to the things that are going on with the rest of the group.
I used to have a mom whose little one was in the playpen everyday when she came to pick up. her baby wasn't in the playpen all day, it just so happened that when this mom picked up is when we were in clean up mode and i felt it was best to have the baby out of the way. i told the mom why her little seemed to always be in the playpen at pick up and she completly understood.
Communication would be good if you do truly like the provider.
OP-you may want to speak with the provider before you pull your child from care. maybe when you pick up is an extra crazy time of day. propping the bottle is a HUGE no, and if you decide to stay with her make it clear you don't want the bottle propped. but maybe she has the infant in the car seat at that time due to the things that are going on with the rest of the group.
I used to have a mom whose little one was in the playpen everyday when she came to pick up. her baby wasn't in the playpen all day, it just so happened that when this mom picked up is when we were in clean up mode and i felt it was best to have the baby out of the way. i told the mom why her little seemed to always be in the playpen at pick up and she completly understood.
Communication would be good if you do truly like the provider.