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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Discussing Behavior With A New Family
jenboo 11:32 AM 03-06-2014
I have a new 5yr old DCG that started about 3 weeks ago, maybe 4.
She isn't used to being around younger kids. This is a big adjustment for her. There are also a few other behaviors I want to address with mom, but I don't want to bombard her with all these "bad" things her child does.
Have I given it enough time for DCG to adjust and should i start talking with mom?
Here is a list of what im working on with DCG:
1. not hitting, squeezing arms, pushing the younger kids when they do something she doesn't like (touch her, take her toy). She needs to tell me and I will get the toy back, move the child, etc)
2. Not taking toys out of the younger kids' hands.
3. Cleaning up. There is always an excuse when it comes time to clean up.
4. A few times a day she will completely ignore me. Sometimes it will be during an activity, if she is upset about something, other reason that I don't even know. She will just stare at me and wont respond at all. Ill leave her alone and eventually she rejoins us. (just wondering if she does this at home or just here)
Is there anything you wouldn't address with mom? Mom thinks she is very mature and isn't a big fan of there being only 1 other older child her. (DCG will only be here until june so mom is going to try and stick it out). I don't really see any maturity...she seems like an average 4-5 yr old who needs a little more help socially.
any advice would be great
She isn't used to being around younger kids. This is a big adjustment for her. There are also a few other behaviors I want to address with mom, but I don't want to bombard her with all these "bad" things her child does.
Have I given it enough time for DCG to adjust and should i start talking with mom?
Here is a list of what im working on with DCG:
1. not hitting, squeezing arms, pushing the younger kids when they do something she doesn't like (touch her, take her toy). She needs to tell me and I will get the toy back, move the child, etc)
2. Not taking toys out of the younger kids' hands.
3. Cleaning up. There is always an excuse when it comes time to clean up.
4. A few times a day she will completely ignore me. Sometimes it will be during an activity, if she is upset about something, other reason that I don't even know. She will just stare at me and wont respond at all. Ill leave her alone and eventually she rejoins us. (just wondering if she does this at home or just here)
Is there anything you wouldn't address with mom? Mom thinks she is very mature and isn't a big fan of there being only 1 other older child her. (DCG will only be here until june so mom is going to try and stick it out). I don't really see any maturity...she seems like an average 4-5 yr old who needs a little more help socially.
any advice would be great
Blackcat31 12:20 PM 03-06-2014
I think it is the perfect time to talk with mom.
I would address physical aggressiveness and use of words instead of hands and I would address respect to you.
The cleaning up and listening to you fall under respecting and listening to you.
Give what things you listed in your post as examples.
It is probably a tough thing for mom to teach as there aren't any other kids at home but she CAN talk with her child and tell her she supports YOU in having her follow rules and listen. Including cleaning up.
I would also let mom know what type of consequences and motivators you will use to help build these skills.
See what she (DCM) says and how receptive she is to your complaints.
Make sure you mention some positives too so that mom knows that it isn't just the negative things you are noticing.
Maybe work in the fact that the little girl is smart and that is why you expect her to use words and NOT hands when she wants something and that she is plenty old enough to pick up when she is done with an activity or toy before being allowed to move onto something else.
I would address physical aggressiveness and use of words instead of hands and I would address respect to you.
The cleaning up and listening to you fall under respecting and listening to you.
Give what things you listed in your post as examples.
It is probably a tough thing for mom to teach as there aren't any other kids at home but she CAN talk with her child and tell her she supports YOU in having her follow rules and listen. Including cleaning up.
I would also let mom know what type of consequences and motivators you will use to help build these skills.
See what she (DCM) says and how receptive she is to your complaints.
Make sure you mention some positives too so that mom knows that it isn't just the negative things you are noticing.
Maybe work in the fact that the little girl is smart and that is why you expect her to use words and NOT hands when she wants something and that she is plenty old enough to pick up when she is done with an activity or toy before being allowed to move onto something else.
Imagination's Creations 12:30 PM 03-06-2014
Use the sandwich approach... A positive, negative, positive. The hitting and aggressive behavior definitely needs to be addressed asap as well as the not listening. For the cleaning up, I have a rule "Everyone plays, everyone helps" It doesnt matter what who played with, everyone helps. Make a game out of it. Give each child an area or specific toy to clean up, have them race to see if they can finish by the end of a song, or who can clean up their area first.
jenboo 01:43 PM 03-06-2014
ok great. I always get so nervous about this part of the job...well anything that involves the parents 