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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>When a DCK Just Doesn't Show Up
Josiegirl 02:51 AM 03-10-2018
This has happened several times now and it's annoying and irritating to say the least. Every other time I've texted dcm to ask if dcb is coming. Yesterday I didn't and never heard from anyone. I can only assume dcd kept him. He's the one who drops the ball when it comes to communication. It's just maddening because he comes at noon so I get his nap things all ready, have snack planned for a certain number of kids, etc.

I'm tempted to term because since dcb started in Sept. it's been 1 issue after another. Not anything super major but tons of irritating things. BUT if I term then that leaves me with 3 dcks this summer and the other 4 yo dck would be a handful without a partner in crime. I get calls for babies but never older kids. I don't think I could afford just 3 dcks.
I get so sick of being the one who always has to go asking parents for things, why can't they be the ones who volunteer info, etc.? Oh and Thursday? He came with 1 mitten. WTH? At least he had snowpants and boots this time.
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Tin Blues 05:46 AM 03-10-2018
Licensing recently changed requirements here for no shows. Provider is required to call and keep going down the emergency contact list until we get an answer.
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Josiegirl 06:39 AM 03-10-2018
Originally Posted by Tin Blues:
Licensing recently changed requirements here for no shows. Provider is required to call and keep going down the emergency contact list until we get an answer.
But it shouldn't have to be that way!! Soon parents won't be held responsible for anything! And it's as if we have nothing else to do.
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ChelseaB 07:51 PM 03-10-2018
Originally Posted by Josiegirl:
But it shouldn't have to be that way!! Soon parents won't be held responsible for anything! And it's as if we have nothing else to do.
Amen to this!!! I’ve also had a recent family who’ve taken to not messaging me when they don’t plan on bringing their child. This has been a non-issue until now, and it’s especially frustrating when they don’t answer your text/call as to whether the child will be attending. Gah. I’m sure I only have to ask them to let me know, they really are a good family. I just wish I didn’t have to ask lol.
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Lil_Diddle 11:37 PM 03-10-2018
Originally Posted by Tin Blues:
Licensing recently changed requirements here for no shows. Provider is required to call and keep going down the emergency contact list until we get an answer.
I can understand this with all of the children being left in hot cars in the last few years. As for me, if they are not here by 9 which is my cut off time and they haven’t called I don’t allow them to use unexcused absences. They must pay for the day. At 9:00 is when I start checking in with parents.
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Blackcat31 07:58 AM 03-11-2018
Originally Posted by Tin Blues:
Licensing recently changed requirements here for no shows. Provider is required to call and keep going down the emergency contact list until we get an answer.
Oh heck no!

If licensing required us to do that I’d quit.
I refuse to parent parents and I refuse to work under rules that support and encourage providers to do so.

For no shows... I bill for the day anyways and don’t give it another thought.

....however my policies state that since communication is key to a successful working relationship....after 3 no shows, I consider the behavior a disregard or violation of program policies and that means immediate termination of services.

I refuse to work with a family that does not respect or value my time/services.

In today’s world there is simply no excuse for no communication other than pure laziness or lack of respect.

Josie- I’m sorry your DCF is being so rude towards you

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Josiegirl 02:17 PM 03-11-2018
Thanks BC. Hey, we all have to have 1 dcf we can vent about right?
Dcm makes sure I get paid every week, on time, now. So that's a step. She has major issues with her ex and is thoroughly frustrated by him. I mentioned in another post that I'm sending home a monthly letter tomorrow, with reminders of policies I'm having issues with. I also mention drop-off people WILL be sent home to retrieve it, if dck is without proper winter attire. Everybody else is sooo good about bringing everything that they need; why the he!! can't this dcf? For 2 days he came without snowpants and boots because his dad had dropped him off at dcms without them, then left town. So of course she instantly blamed dcd. Why not go out and buy extras to have at each home?? It's not rocket science! One day he came with 1 mitten cause dcd couldn't find the other. Again, extras people!!
And further disregard for my policies may result in a 2 week notice.
So even though it might be passive aggressive of me using a letter, at least it'll be said.
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Snowmom 06:58 AM 03-12-2018
I have a family that occasionally does this too. Except I have a cut off time for drop offs, so I lock the door and mark them absent.

I think much the same as BC- I'm not going to parent the parents. I won't spend my time trying to track someone down either. It's not my job.

The missing gear:
I was toying with the idea of supplying everything here next season (snow pants, mittens, hats, even boots).
I'm tired of the parents who bring in complicated or missing gear. Once Upon A Child has their $1 sale twice a year. I bought 3 pairs of snow pants and even some nice winter jackets for $1 a piece.
If you have room, maybe you do something similar and charge a seasonal supply fee?
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daycarediva 09:58 AM 03-12-2018
You have some CHALLENGING families this year! OUCH!


I would call and keep calling, call emergency pick ups. I would make it SUCH a big deal that they would never do it again. I have a 9am cut off, and bill anyway. Like BC- I have a 3 strikes policy.


I also started supplying everything except boots (and most parents have coats, but I have a hoard of back ups). I charge a $50 annual supply fee per child every September and have been able to get a really great stock of winter and summer items.

Now I really want to start getting rain boots and muddy buddies in all sizes
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hwichlaz 03:58 PM 03-12-2018
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Oh heck no!

If licensing required us to do that I’d quit.
I refuse to parent parents and I refuse to work under rules that support and encourage providers to do so.

For no shows... I bill for the day anyways and don’t give it another thought.

....however my policies state that since communication is key to a successful working relationship....after 3 no shows, I consider the behavior a disregard or violation of program policies and that means immediate termination of services.

I refuse to work with a family that does not respect or value my time/services.

In today’s world there is simply no excuse for no communication other than pure laziness or lack of respect.

Josie- I’m sorry your DCF is being so rude towards you

I don’t have a problem with licensing requiring that...just like I also don’t have a problem with implementing a 3 strikes and you’re out policy. The 3rd time I’d have to do that, I’d term.
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Josiegirl 02:37 AM 03-13-2018
All the other dcfs seem to be able to bring what they need, call when they're not coming, it's called being a responsible parent, especially when they've been reminded before and it's in the policies.
I don't have the money or the room to store all the extra stuff I'd need for all of the dcfs. I have extra mittens and hats and some clothes. But that's it.
I feel sad for this particular dck, his parents make excuses and blame each other.
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DaveA 03:33 AM 03-13-2018
Originally Posted by Tin Blues:
Licensing recently changed requirements here for no shows. Provider is required to call and keep going down the emergency contact list until we get an answer.
Oh for the love of.... DCPs are my clients, not my kids.
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amberrose3dg 03:43 AM 03-13-2018
Originally Posted by Josiegirl:
All the other dcfs seem to be able to bring what they need, call when they're not coming, it's called being a responsible parent, especially when they've been reminded before and it's in the policies.
I don't have the money or the room to store all the extra stuff I'd need for all of the dcfs. I have extra mittens and hats and some clothes. But that's it.
I feel sad for this particular dck, his parents make excuses and blame each other.
Oh no I do not see how this should be a daycare providers responsibility. Parents will never take responsibility if you keep giving them excuses.
The day we are required to do that here I will close my doors. I am not being held liable when they aren't even in my care. What is next? Being required to know how and what the parents do at home?
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hwichlaz 02:21 PM 03-13-2018
Originally Posted by DaveA:
Oh for the love of.... DCPs are my clients, not my kids.
I agree, but if it keeps one kid from cooking to death in the parking lot outside a parent’s work....
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Josiegirl 02:41 AM 03-14-2018
Well, after I sent the monthly letter home, dcm got right on dcd's butt and in her words, scolded him. Lol So he texted me last night telling me what the plans are for the remainder of the week. He's just so daM$ disrespectful of others and only cares about himself.
Now if I could only get my stellar dcm on board with picking up on time. I even mentioned in the letter to check their original contracts to make sure they're picking up on time. She knows I close at 5:00 and makes an effort to be here by then. But those are not the hours she chose when she enrolled.
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DaveA 03:27 AM 03-14-2018
Originally Posted by Josiegirl:
Well, after I sent the monthly letter home, dcm got right on dcd's butt and in her words, scolded him. Lol So he texted me last night telling me what the plans are for the remainder of the week. He's just so daM$ disrespectful of others and only cares about himself.
Now if I could only get my stellar dcm on board with picking up on time. I even mentioned in the letter to check their original contracts to make sure they're picking up on time. She knows I close at 5:00 and makes an effort to be here by then. But those are not the hours she chose when she enrolled.
Well it's a start

Originally Posted by hwichlaz:
I agree, but if it keeps one kid from cooking to death in the parking lot outside a parent’s work....
I understand that, but what worries me is that I could see this being twisted into the provider being partially "responsible" for the actions of a parent. Not a line I want to get anywhere near.
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Rockgirl 04:31 AM 03-14-2018
Originally Posted by DaveA:
I understand that, but what worries me is that I could see this being twisted into the provider being partially "responsible" for the actions of a parent. Not a line I want to get anywhere near.
This is my thought, as well. If it’s required of us to call, liability will come with that.
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AmyKidsCo 06:42 PM 03-14-2018
Originally Posted by DaveA:
I understand that, but what worries me is that I could see this being twisted into the provider being partially "responsible" for the actions of a parent. Not a line I want to get anywhere near.
ITA! But in WI we're required to call parents if a child doesn't arrive in X amount of time after their contracted drop-off time. I think it's dumb that we can choose the amount of time and there's no guidelines for what to do if we don't get an answer.

My policies state that I charge a $5 fee for each phone call. Not that I've ever charged it, but I could.
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Blackcat31 06:56 AM 03-15-2018
Originally Posted by hwichlaz:
I agree, but if it keeps one kid from cooking to death in the parking lot outside a parent’s work....
Then where does it stop?

I could call everyone of my parents after hours and conduct well child checks to make sure the kids are being supervised, not being abused, are being fed, bathed and are being cared for properly as well as not provided too with too many opportunities to get hurt or or lost..

and that would more than likely prevent at least one child from being abused (physically, mentally and/or emotionally) without a doubt.

But I'm not going to.
It's simply a responsibility that I refuse to assume.

fwiw~ I understand where you are coming from but those same types of ideas are exactly why a majority of this society has no concept of accountability.
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Tags:bad fit, drop off issues, late arrivals
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