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Denali 10:05 AM 09-08-2016
So, me again...

This post is regarding to my post dated check family. I did bring up that I would not be able to do post dated checks anymore, but if they wanted to write in the memo line not to cash until XX date, I'll hold the check until then.

They are supposed to pay me on the 1st and 15th (Husband payday). But they have not been for a 3 months.

They have actually been paying on DCM's pay days. So August I was paid the 12th and the 26th. I issues invoices on the 22nd, though I gave DCM her's on the 26th once her post dated check cleared.

The invoice was very clear that payment was due on the 1st and 15th this month. Usually if it's going to be a problem for them DCM tells me. I haven't gotten any word about being paid, so last night I talked to DCD, told him that payment was due on the 1st and I haven't been paid yet. He said he'd talk to DCM... I asked him if we needed to change they're payment due date to be on mom's Paydays? He said that might be best as DCM pays me out of her checking account that he's not on. He again said he'd talk to DCM.

At pick up DCM was in a hury, and didn't say anything about payment, but did say that they were off to meet up with DCD, so I figured he hadn't talked to her yet and didn't say anything. This Morning at drop-off mom didn't say a word about payment.

It is now 8 days past their payment due date. On 8/1 I had mom sign a new contract that explained payment late fees, late pick up fees going up, and confirming their payment due date was still going to be the 1st and 15th of every month. She had a chance to change it then, to say something then, but did not.

Her next pay day is tomorrow.

I'm trying to get my Daycare to start running like how I want it. I need to be paid. My Policies followed. I need to know when I'm getting paid. This whole not paying and them not saying anything about not paying me isn't working for me. I want to say something, but this is one area I have very little backbone. But want that backbone bad.

I only have 3 daycare kids (out of the 6 I can have) and have been having terrible luck with starting families - finding out they lied during interview/don't want to follow policies.

Losing this family would be bad, as we can NOT really afford to loose the money, but Devil's advocate - I'm not making any money (Since I haven't been paid yet) off them so I'm basically working for free, and I'd rather not work at all then work and not get paid.

I want to send a text (mom is a BIG text person, I get more follow through when I text vs speaking with her) about payment being past due.

So I need advice,

Should I just text "Hey DCM, payment for daycare was due on the 1st, please don't forget to bring payment at pick up today thanks!" And leave it at that?

Or "Hey DCM, payment is past due for the care of DCG, please don't forget to add $175 in late payment fees ($25 per day payment is late) when you bring payment this afternoon at pick up, thank you."

Or "Hey DCM, as of today your daycare bill is past due. Payment was due on the 1st and no other payment plan has been discussed. Payment is due at pick up today. If we need to discuss another payment schedule please let me know."

At pick-up today I will be addressing payment again face to face. I am planning on turning away at the door at drop-off tomorrow if they do not bring payment by tomorrow morning. DCM gets paid tomorrow. She can turn around and go to the bank and get me cash with DCG, come back and pay me, and drop DCG off.

I want to be reasonable. But I want to make it clear that this will not happen again. If payment due dates need to be changed than I can work with that. But I need to know when I'm getting paid so IF they don't pay on time I can/will hold them accountable.
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laundrymom 10:20 AM 09-08-2016
I would text and say.
Hey mom, I still haven't received tuition that was due on September first. Balance is $ (however much the fee is including late fees up to today). If you don't pay until tomorrow add $25. Because payment is so late I will need it in cash so it credits to my bank immediately.
Thanks. See you at pick up.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 10:21 AM 09-08-2016
Originally Posted by Denali:
So, me again...

This post is regarding to my post dated check family. I did bring up that I would not be able to do post dated checks anymore, but if they wanted to write in the memo line not to cash until XX date, I'll hold the check until then.

They are supposed to pay me on the 1st and 15th (Husband payday). But they have not been for a 3 months.

They have actually been paying on DCM's pay days. So August I was paid the 12th and the 26th. I issues invoices on the 22nd, though I gave DCM her's on the 26th once her post dated check cleared.

The invoice was very clear that payment was due on the 1st and 15th this month. Usually if it's going to be a problem for them DCM tells me. I haven't gotten any word about being paid, so last night I talked to DCD, told him that payment was due on the 1st and I haven't been paid yet. He said he'd talk to DCM... I asked him if we needed to change they're payment due date to be on mom's Paydays? He said that might be best as DCM pays me out of her checking account that he's not on. He again said he'd talk to DCM.

At pick up DCM was in a hury, and didn't say anything about payment, but did say that they were off to meet up with DCD, so I figured he hadn't talked to her yet and didn't say anything. This Morning at drop-off mom didn't say a word about payment.

It is now 8 days past their payment due date. On 8/1 I had mom sign a new contract that explained payment late fees, late pick up fees going up, and confirming their payment due date was still going to be the 1st and 15th of every month. She had a chance to change it then, to say something then, but did not.

Her next pay day is tomorrow.

I'm trying to get my Daycare to start running like how I want it. I need to be paid. My Policies followed. I need to know when I'm getting paid. This whole not paying and them not saying anything about not paying me isn't working for me. I want to say something, but this is one area I have very little backbone. But want that backbone bad.

I only have 3 daycare kids (out of the 6 I can have) and have been having terrible luck with starting families - finding out they lied during interview/don't want to follow policies.

Losing this family would be bad, as we can NOT really afford to loose the money, but Devil's advocate - I'm not making any money (Since I haven't been paid yet) off them so I'm basically working for free, and I'd rather not work at all then work and not get paid.

I want to send a text (mom is a BIG text person, I get more follow through when I text vs speaking with her) about payment being past due.

So I need advice,

Should I just text "Hey DCM, payment for daycare was due on the 1st, please don't forget to bring payment at pick up today thanks!" And leave it at that?

Or "Hey DCM, payment is past due for the care of DCG, please don't forget to add $175 in late payment fees ($25 per day payment is late) when you bring payment this afternoon at pick up, thank you."

Or "Hey DCM, as of today your daycare bill is past due. Payment was due on the 1st and no other payment plan has been discussed. Payment is due at pick up today. If we need to discuss another payment schedule please let me know."

At pick-up today I will be addressing payment again face to face. I am planning on turning away at the door at drop-off tomorrow if they do not bring payment by tomorrow morning. DCM gets paid tomorrow. She can turn around and go to the bank and get me cash with DCG, come back and pay me, and drop DCG off.

I want to be reasonable. But I want to make it clear that this will not happen again. If payment due dates need to be changed than I can work with that. But I need to know when I'm getting paid so IF they don't pay on time I can/will hold them accountable.
Hi DCM,
As per the contract you signed on the August 1 Johnny's tuition payment was due on the 1st of the month and late fees would be applied for each day late. Please bring payment in full this evening and the $175.00 in late fees.
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Unregistered 10:26 AM 09-08-2016
At this point I would enforce no pay, no stay. I know you want to be reasonable, but you have been. You are being taken advantage of. Let mom know in person that dcg can not come back until nalance is paid in full. I would give her a break on the late fees, telling her what the late fees are and then tell her, "Just this one time I will only charge you one $25 fee." Due in cash tonight/tomorrow.
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Mike 10:29 AM 09-08-2016
Originally Posted by laundrymom:
I would text and say.
Hey mom, I still haven't received tuition that was due on September first. Balance is $ (however much the fee is including late fees up to today). If you don't pay until tomorrow add $25. Because payment is so late I will need it in cash so it credits to my bank immediately.
Thanks. See you at pick up.
I like this one.

I would maybe add in that she can't drop off tomorrow without payment, but that depends how badly you need the income. You definitely do need to set a too late date though, whether it's tomorrow morning, or later if you prefer, but I wouldn't wait much longer.
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MunchkinWrangler 10:40 AM 09-08-2016
No pay no stay would fix the problem. I know you're trying to work with her but the most important part of your post is that you want your policies followed.

This is dcm's issue she is technically paying late and not making an effort to be in line with the payment due dates. She is under the thinking of "what's a few days" if you are still getting payment. I think you can expect the same from her, meaning she can either budget her finances better to pay you on time or early. My biggest issue with this is that the payment is late. What happens if termination happens on her part or yours? Would she be able to pay the notice period and whatever late payment that she is paying?
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Nurse Jackie 10:43 AM 09-08-2016
I would enforce the no pay no stay rule and charge her the late fees. You've been more than reasonable and she keeps testing you. If you let it slide this time next week she's gonna test you again.
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Unregistered 10:52 AM 09-08-2016
Telling them "no postdated checks" then saying "if you want to write a memo I'll hold it until then" is the same thing. Right there you enforced a policy and broke it.
That shows them they can continue to do whatever they want. I would absolutely charge them a late fee, only take the payment in cash, and not let them come back until it's paid. When they do it again (which they will) DO NOT allow them to drop off their child until they pay...ON TIME, every time. Paying that late, and not caring about the fact that you are taking care of their child all day is complete disrespect and I would not advise letting it go that far anymore. I totally understand the "I need the money" aspect, but as you said, you're not getting any money from them. I'm sorry if this came off as rude at all, I just can't believe these people would put you in this position, but people will treat you the way you show them they are allowed to treat you. You need to put on your game face, and tell them this is unacceptable and if they can't follow the rules, they can go find someone else to pay whenever they feel like it
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Pestle 10:57 AM 09-08-2016
I get how you feel, because I'm barely scraping by cashwise right now and we'd crash and burn if anybody pulled their kids. But--

You can't afford to lose her, but you actually have lost her. You're working for free. Pay-wise, it doesn't matter if those kids are staying with you or not. If you draw a line in the sand and she pulls the kids, you have that much extra time to search for a legitimate, paying arrangement with someone else.
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Meeko 11:06 AM 09-08-2016
No pay. No stay.

Every. Single. Time.

They will keep doing this, because you are allowing it.
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Denali 11:40 AM 09-08-2016
DCM said she'd pay tomorrow at drop off. I fully intend to follow through with the "no pay, no play" part of my policies if she does not.

She did say that she'd pay me tomorrow and on the 23rd. So I straight out asked her if she needed to change payment due dates. No response yet.

I will have a new contract for her tonight. And will explain that if she is unable to pay on her current due dates than we will need to figure out another payment schedule for her. To keep in mind that my new policies are in effect, which includes late payment fees, and I will have to start charging them in the future if she doesn't pay on time.

Wish me luck with the backbone...

Also: the post dated checks. I've been told that dating the check with the current date means I can cash is anytime regardless of what the memo says. The memo is a suggestion not law, where as the date on the check is law and no bank will cash a check before the date that's writen on the check.

My understanding of my states bad check law is I'm not protected legally if I take a post dated check. If a take a check with the current date on it, and hold it, and it's bad, than I can sue and press charges for 3x the amount of the check (not to exceed $1000) plus late payment fees that are stated in my contract. That's my understanding anyway...
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Denali 11:50 AM 09-08-2016
Originally Posted by Meeko:
No pay. No stay.

Every. Single. Time.

They will keep doing this, because you are allowing it.
I know...

That is basically where I'm going. To the "no pay, no play, late fees per day not paid" But don't want to slap them in the face with the rule book as I've been very weak in backbone and lack in policy enforcement up until now. I'm changing that.

They also had been very busy getting DCG evaluated... So I've given them a few days more than I really should have, having been where they are with my son....

The flip side is they have bad budgeting problems. But than that's not my problem. Not anymore. These bad behaviors will be resolved this month. Maybe even tomorrow if they don't pay.
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Unregistered 12:09 PM 09-08-2016
Originally Posted by Denali:

Also: the post dated checks. I've been told that dating the check with the current date means I can cash is anytime regardless of what the memo says. The memo is a suggestion not law, where as the date on the check is law and no bank will cash a check before the date that's writen on the check.

My understanding of my states bad check law is I'm not protected legally if I take a post dated check. If a take a check with the current date on it, and hold it, and it's bad, than I can sue and press charges for 3x the amount of the check (not to exceed $1000) plus late payment fees that are stated in my contract. That's my understanding anyway...
There are many misconceptions about postdated checks. Generally, checks are considered legal tender when they are signed, regardless of the date written on them. You can attempt to cash a post dated check as soon as you receive it and it is up to the bank's discretion whether or not to cash it. Many will.

The only case when the date on a post-dated check is legally binding is if the check writer has informed in advance BOTH the recipient and the check writer's bank that they do not want the check to be cashed before the written date. If this notice is in formal written format, it is binding for 6 months. If it is verbal, it is binding for 14 days.
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racemom 12:10 PM 09-08-2016
Are you charging for current time. If so, work with her to get ahead. So when she pays you on the first it is for the 15th to the 30th. Then the 15th is next months, first two weeks. That way she is does not owe you for work you have already done. And also, talk to her about changing pay days if that will help her get you paid on time. If you want to keep her, I would be willing to work out a pre-payment plan where she pays you so much extra each time so that she can eventually be paying ahead.
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Denali 12:20 PM 09-08-2016
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Telling them "no postdated checks" then saying "if you want to write a memo I'll hold it until then" is the same thing. Right there you enforced a policy and broke it.
That shows them they can continue to do whatever they want. I would absolutely charge them a late fee, only take the payment in cash, and not let them come back until it's paid. When they do it again (which they will) DO NOT allow them to drop off their child until they pay...ON TIME, every time. Paying that late, and not caring about the fact that you are taking care of their child all day is complete disrespect and I would not advise letting it go that far anymore. I totally understand the "I need the money" aspect, but as you said, you're not getting any money from them. I'm sorry if this came off as rude at all, I just can't believe these people would put you in this position, but people will treat you the way you show them they are allowed to treat you. You need to put on your game face, and tell them this is unacceptable and if they can't follow the rules, they can go find someone else to pay whenever they feel like it
It is not rude, it's what I need to hear.

I'm a natural people pleaser. It's hard to sand up for myself. My family constantly call me the marshmallow, it's that bad. My DH and Mother-in-law are my stand in backbone. I'm getting better. I've found my backbone with new families, hence why they're "Not following policies/Not paying/2 month old not taking bottle and mom wanting me to bottle train" havent gotten them anything other than the door, when before I would have just quitely delt.

My current families have only known me as soft. But 2 out of the 3 are happy with my change in attitude and have fallen in line without a peep. Both these families have been with me 2+ years and had always paid on time, if they were a few days late they'd be horrified and pay me + a Starbucks coffee or chocolate treat. I've never had to say anything about payment to them.

The DCF that has been here for 3.5 years even said it was about time I updated my policies and I stood up for myself. (This family is my awesome family) When they had money trouble a year ago, they told me that they shut off their home phone and Internet, so call cells if I needed to talk to them, all while handing me their monthly payment.

I want them to fall in line, but don't want to beat them with the rule book all of the sudden when they are used to my weak backbone. I mean, can I just whip out my policies and snack them with it and go "It's on! Now!" Or do I wean them into it by telling them that this is how it is, last weak backbone, last month to straighten up, or they are getting hit with my policies?
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Meeko 12:37 PM 09-08-2016
Originally Posted by Meeko:
No pay. No stay.

Every. Single. Time.

They will keep doing this, because you are allowing it.
And I'm not saying that to be bossy. I'm saying it because "Been there. Done that"

I used to think that if I let people slide on paymeny or rules, I was being 'sensitive" and that they would love me for it and not want to do it again etc etc.

Wrong! If you give an inch they WILL take a mile.

After 30 plus years at this, I now know better and enforce policy.

You will grow that backbone, I promise!!
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AmyKidsCo 01:14 PM 09-08-2016
"I want to be reasonable. But I want to make it clear that this will not happen again. If payment due dates need to be changed than I can work with that. But I need to know when I'm getting paid so IF they don't pay on time I can/will hold them accountable."

It sounds like you're OK being paid on DCM's paydays but want to know for sure that those are the dates that you'll be paid.

If that's the case I'd change their contract to those dates and have them make an extra payment so they're caught up. Basically, their 26th payment would be other families' 1st and their 12th payment would be other families' 15th payment. That way they pay on DCM's paydays and you're not behind in payments. You could let them divide the extra payment up over 2 paydays so they don't have to pay a huge amount at once.
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LostMyMarbles 02:09 PM 09-08-2016
You could just let her write her own contract...I'm kidding...by constantly rewriting a contract for her, she is in control. We can not constantly rewrite a contract for every parent for every thing they don't want to comply with. They signed it before starting, they agreed to these requests.

I know it is hard to have a back bone. I have let people slide sometimes, but I decided to take charge, I feel better about my business when I run it. Can you call your mortgage company and rewrite you contract. Nope!

I agree with no pay no stay. That will shake the, up.

Please let us know your outcome!
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e.j. 03:49 PM 09-08-2016
Originally Posted by Denali:
I want them to fall in line, but don't want to beat them with the rule book all of the sudden when they are used to my weak backbone. I mean, can I just whip out my policies and snack them with it and go "It's on! Now!" Or do I wean them into it by telling them that this is how it is, last weak backbone, last month to straighten up, or they are getting hit with my policies?
It sounds as though you really do need to beat them with the rule book. You've put up with way too much for way too long already and rather than appreciate your kindness, they're still thumbing their nose at you. She signed the new contract so she knows what your payment policy is. You spoke with her husband about the overdue payment so he knows they owe you money and yet neither parent has acted to get you that check - or even had the courtesy to talk to you about it. They don't need to be "weaned in to it"; they already know what your payment policy is; they're choosing not to respect it. I agree with the others when they said, "No Pay/No Stay".
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mommyneedsadayoff 04:08 PM 09-08-2016
Originally Posted by LostMyMarbles:
You could just let her write her own contract...I'm kidding...by constantly rewriting a contract for her, she is in control. We can not constantly rewrite a contract for every parent for every thing they don't want to comply with. They signed it before starting, they agreed to these requests.
Originally Posted by LostMyMarbles:

I know it is hard to have a back bone. I have let people slide sometimes, but I decided to take charge, I feel better about my business when I run it. Can you call your mortgage company and rewrite you contract. Nope!

I agree with no pay no stay. That will shake the, up.

Please let us know your outcome!
I completely agree. If they need to change payment days, it is on THEM to make that request, in person, and before payment is due. You have been more than reasonable and you are verging on being turned into a complete door mat. Take back control and enforce payment dates and late fees. Keep it simple. Text: "Dcm, payment is due on the first and you are late. Total owed at this point is $$ and is due at drop off tomorrow. Care will be suspended until payment is made." Then follow through. The first time is the hardest! You can do it!
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Denali 02:32 PM 09-10-2016
Update:

Friday at drop off dcm came with DCG and their new puppy. Pretty sure it was to hopefully distract me from asking about money, as she dropped DCG off and never stopped talking about the puppy and her being so busy, turned to run out the door, only for my to bluntly ask about payment. She said "oh no! I almost forgot! I'll get the check!" But of course leaving DCG with me and putting wiggly puppy in her arms. Told her "I'll hold the puppy while you do that! Less you have to struggle with!" Thinking that she was going to get to the car and tell me that she'll have to pay me this afternoon. But I had pretty much just took the puppy from her and made a cow about how cute he was so she had no choice but to either pay me.

she gave me a check. Signed new contract for her new due dates to be on her paydays. Thanks me for working with them and how they were having a hard time with money, that she would have to start working on Fridays again and such and such... I've hard this sad story and knew what was waiting.

I was not able to get the her bank until after daycare closed. Bank declined the check. Went back this morning and again they declined it.

So, I have called and left a message that her bank is telling me the check she gave me is no good and to please call me as soon as she is able. Im planning on trying again tomorrow again. Though I'm not sure of what I'm going to say...

I do know that-

-Payments will be cash only, due on time, no pay no stay.
-I will be charging her my late payment fees for this. I may wave them if I get a return call this weekend. And I get cash first thing Monday morning.
-late payment fees will be charged from now on, no exceptions. I will never wave fees again for them.
-replace as soon as I can.
-if they fall out of line once, they are gone.

Question:

-I have a $30 returned/nfs check fee. Should I charge this?
-what should I say tomorrow when I call? I have a feeling that she'll keep ignoring my calls and try and tell me that she didn't get the voicemails this weekend and try and drop off Monday.
-should I follow my calls up with a text? Or just wait for Monday and see if she shows?
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Unregistered 02:44 PM 09-10-2016
Yes to adding the NSF charge and late fees. All must be paid up in cash before child enters care again.Once all is paid up in full, I would then issue a two week notice.

They have shown how far down on their priority list paying you is.
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sharlan 03:14 PM 09-10-2016
I would send one last text - NO PAY, NO STAY.

Do not let them make their financial problems become yours. Stand firm.
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MunchkinWrangler 04:06 PM 09-10-2016
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT allow them into care until EVERYTHING is paid up. The issues you were dealing with were the tio of the iceberg leading to dcm to pull this crap.


I wouldn't even have any sort of conversation with the parents. Either they pay what they owe on top of any prepaid monies owed for care or your contract needs to be terminated immediately and you absolutely have a small claims case on your hands. They are obligated to pay for services rendered. This is theft by swindle, technically.

They would also be put on a cash only basis from here on out. As well as no money, no care.

On a side note I would have refused to have them bring in the new puppy into my home. They obviously had money to purchase a new pet but no money to pay for their childcare??? That's a bunch of BS! The audacity!!
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Unregistered 05:41 PM 09-10-2016
I would bet they don't even show up. If you don't hear from her in a day or two file a small claims immediately.

Kim
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Snowmom 06:46 PM 09-10-2016
So... they can afford a new puppy but not daycare? Classy.
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Leigh 07:34 PM 09-10-2016
Originally Posted by Snowmom:
So... they can afford a new puppy but not daycare? Classy.
Exactly. Puppies are freaking expensive. Sounds like they're not having money problems, but PRIORITY problems.
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Nurse Jackie 08:59 PM 09-10-2016
Originally Posted by Leigh:
Exactly. Puppies are freaking expensive. Sounds like they're not having money problems, but PRIORITY problems.
Yep I was thinking the exact same thing. But hey people will do to you what you allow them to do.
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Rockgirl 07:25 AM 09-11-2016
At this point, I'd require the entire balance to be paid in cash, then term. She knew exactly what she was doing, handing you a bad check. And that's after trying to slip out without even giving you one at all. Payment will always be an issue with this family, in my opinion.
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Unregistered 08:59 PM 09-11-2016
*Anxiously eating popcorn, waiting to see what happens tomorrow morning*

Seriously, the nerve of this dcf... I would also accept cash only and then immediately term. But I do not believe they will be showing up.

I hope everything works out in the best possible way for you. Good luck!
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daycarediva 04:36 AM 09-12-2016
WOW!

I would give her a heads up text "Dcm, your check was not able to be cashed due to NSF, I will need X fees, plus the X fee for a bounced check and the X late fees at drop off this morning or dcg cannot attend.
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LostMyMarbles 09:31 AM 09-12-2016
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
*Anxiously eating popcorn, waiting to see what happens tomorrow morning*

Seriously, the nerve of this dcf... I would also accept cash only and then immediately term. But I do not believe they will be showing up.

I hope everything works out in the best possible way for you. Good luck!
g

Enquiring minds want to know!
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Denali 10:28 AM 09-12-2016
Update:

Sunday mid morning DCM text me telling me that she just got my message that I left Saturday and called the bank to find out what was going on. She continued to tell me that her account has fraud on it and someone had spent her money. That she'd pay me cash Monday morning. I wasn't going to hold my breath but did remind her that my new policies were in effect, including late payments and returned check fees. She said ok no problem.

She did show up this morning with $300 cash. Eight dollars and fees short of being complete payment. She asked if that was going to ok and if DCG could come, that she could add the rest onto the next check (23rd), I made a "oh that's really not going to work for me face" and she responded that "or I can pay you the rest in 2 days when DCD gets paid..." I told her that would be fine, though if she brought me something from the bank stating that she was the victim of fraud that I'd be more than happy to wave the fees.

she looked uncomfortable and said she should've just made it the payment Friday in cash and we could have avoided all this trouble, that from now on she'd be paying in cash. I agreed that would be best ( didn't say anything about that I was gonna require it because it's always best when parents think it's their idea I've learned).

Told her about brightwheels pay online feature and that we can most definitely do that, since she always has her phone there would be no worry about forgetting a checkbook or having to go to the bank to get cash and run the risk of paying late and getting late payment fees. That she could pay me the morning of when payment was due without any fuss, and wouldn't have to worry about late payment fees as long as payment was authorized the day payment was due.

She said "oh that sounds great" and looked upset/unhappy when she left.

I'm going to put off terminating care with her because as long as I get paid in two days then I don't mind continuing as long as she's going to make payments in cash/brightwheel from now on. Though if she steps out of line or is late she'll get slapped with fees and the rulebook and be gone. We have enough emergency savings to last us a few months if we lose this family.

I have another child scheduled to start Thursday. The DCP's had wanted to start today, but had told me that they wouldn't be able to pay me until Thursday (also a military family). I told them no. And for some reason they thought that I wouldn't be charging them an enrollment fee because they are military..? I quoted them the amount for the two week trial period plus enrollment fee. When getting the total mom told me that she "would have to check and see if that was OK with dad. I'll have to make sure he agrees with the enrollment fee."

Made it clear when she was leaving after her interview that the price and fee wasn't an option and that the full amount would be due Thursday morning along with paperwork if they wanted child care here. She sent a text a few hours ago asking if I'd at least hold the spot until Thursday. I said yes, but if I didn't hear from them by then I'll move on. Again I'm not holding my breath.

I'm not going to stop interviewing. Though All the interviews I seem to be getting are these self entitled parents lately. Thinking that I should be able to do nanny type care, work for free or think I should be OK with getting paid after I provide care , and they're my boss and they can negotiate my rules.

I have an interview Tuesday for a 4 month old and 4 year old. I really don't want to take a baby, but than I actually know this family. The dad was a daycare kid of my mom's way back when. Our families have kept in touch and they were excited to find out that I had my own daycare and may have openings for his kids.

We'll see.

I will keep everyone updated on the current family and they're trying to make their money problems mine. I think it's been made very clear to DCM that I'm done working around they're spending problems and it will need to be paid on time every time Or no care and being slapped with fees.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 11:40 AM 09-12-2016
I hope things continue to improve as you continue to use your backbone!

Originally Posted by Denali:
Update:

Sunday mid morning DCM text me telling me that she just got my message that I left Saturday and called the bank to find out what was going on. She continued to tell me that her account has fraud on it and someone had spent her money. That she'd pay me cash Monday morning. I wasn't going to hold my breath but did remind her that my new policies were in effect, including late payments and returned check fees. She said ok no problem.

She did show up this morning with $300 cash. Eight dollars and fees short of being complete payment. She asked if that was going to ok and if DCG could come, that she could add the rest onto the next check (23rd), I made a "oh that's really not going to work for me face" and she responded that "or I can pay you the rest in 2 days when DCD gets paid..." I told her that would be fine, though if she brought me something from the bank stating that she was the victim of fraud that I'd be more than happy to wave the fees.

she looked uncomfortable and said she should've just made it the payment Friday in cash and we could have avoided all this trouble, that from now on she'd be paying in cash. I agreed that would be best ( didn't say anything about that I was gonna require it because it's always best when parents think it's their idea I've learned).

Told her about brightwheels pay online feature and that we can most definitely do that, since she always has her phone there would be no worry about forgetting a checkbook or having to go to the bank to get cash and run the risk of paying late and getting late payment fees. That she could pay me the morning of when payment was due without any fuss, and wouldn't have to worry about late payment fees as long as payment was authorized the day payment was due.

She said "oh that sounds great" and looked upset/unhappy when she left.

I'm going to put off terminating care with her because as long as I get paid in two days then I don't mind continuing as long as she's going to make payments in cash/brightwheel from now on. Though if she steps out of line or is late she'll get slapped with fees and the rulebook and be gone. We have enough emergency savings to last us a few months if we lose this family.

I have another child scheduled to start Thursday. The DCP's had wanted to start today, but had told me that they wouldn't be able to pay me until Thursday (also a military family). I told them no. And for some reason they thought that I wouldn't be charging them an enrollment fee because they are military..? I quoted them the amount for the two week trial period plus enrollment fee. When getting the total mom told me that she "would have to check and see if that was OK with dad. I'll have to make sure he agrees with the enrollment fee."

Made it clear when she was leaving after her interview that the price and fee wasn't an option and that the full amount would be due Thursday morning along with paperwork if they wanted child care here. She sent a text a few hours ago asking if I'd at least hold the spot until Thursday. I said yes, but if I didn't hear from them by then I'll move on. Again I'm not holding my breath.

I'm not going to stop interviewing. Though All the interviews I seem to be getting are these self entitled parents lately. Thinking that I should be able to do nanny type care, work for free or think I should be OK with getting paid after I provide care , and they're my boss and they can negotiate my rules.

I have an interview Tuesday for a 4 month old and 4 year old. I really don't want to take a baby, but than I actually know this family. The dad was a daycare kid of my mom's way back when. Our families have kept in touch and they were excited to find out that I had my own daycare and may have openings for his kids.

We'll see.

I will keep everyone updated on the current family and they're trying to make their money problems mine. I think it's been made very clear to DCM that I'm done working around they're spending problems and it will need to be paid on time every time Or no care and being slapped with fees.

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Unregistered 12:29 PM 09-12-2016
May have been a hassle, but you have late fees in your pocket! Way to use your backbone!
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Unregistered 12:32 PM 09-12-2016
This whole situation is ridiculous. You will continue to have this problem with this family because you are still continuing to let them get away with it. She brought you the payment, short, and without late fees...must be because the dog they just bought hacked her bank account right? But you let her child stay, and gave her extra time to think of some more excuses why she won't have it next time. The fact that you cannot make a rule and stick to it shows you will not only continue to have these issues with this family but will most likely have the same issues with future families as well.
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Snowmom 12:52 PM 09-12-2016
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
This whole situation is ridiculous. You will continue to have this problem with this family because you are still continuing to let them get away with it. She brought you the payment, short, and without late fees...must be because the dog they just bought hacked her bank account right? But you let her child stay, and gave her extra time to think of some more excuses why she won't have it next time. The fact that you cannot make a rule and stick to it shows you will not only continue to have these issues with this family but will most likely have the same issues with future families as well.
Well, yes and no.

I think many of us struggle with the backbone part of this business. It's time and experience that helps us build it AND determining what aspects of your business are the most important to you- because what's important to one provider, may not be as valuable to another provider.

You (general "you") always need to do what's best for you and your business/family.

She has money in hand and is continuing to interview to replace them when/if necessary. To me, that is a smart choice.
It might not have been the choice many of us would have made, but that's the beauty of owning your own business- she's free to choose whatever course of action she's comfortable with.
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Rockgirl 12:59 PM 09-12-2016
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
This whole situation is ridiculous. You will continue to have this problem with this family because you are still continuing to let them get away with it. She brought you the payment, short, and without late fees...must be because the dog they just bought hacked her bank account right? But you let her child stay, and gave her extra time to think of some more excuses why she won't have it next time. The fact that you cannot make a rule and stick to it shows you will not only continue to have these issues with this family but will most likely have the same issues with future families as well.
Is a scolding necessary?
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Nurse Jackie 01:14 PM 09-12-2016
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
This whole situation is ridiculous. You will continue to have this problem with this family because you are still continuing to let them get away with it. She brought you the payment, short, and without late fees...must be because the dog they just bought hacked her bank account right? But you let her child stay, and gave her extra time to think of some more excuses why she won't have it next time. The fact that you cannot make a rule and stick to it shows you will not only continue to have these issues with this family but will most likely have the same issues with future families as well.
I thought she said she was only $8 short. Anywho way to grow a back bone . Sounds like you're done letting people take advantage of you. Like blackcat said on another post as long as you look at it as they're stealing from your family, which technically they are, it's easy to go mama bear on them. It's ok to feel sorry for parents financial problems however this is a business. I have financial problems too that's why I'm working. Pay me on time the same way you expect your place of employment to pay you.
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Denali 01:28 PM 09-12-2016
Sometimes it is necessary to be scolded.

She pretty much has 2 days to pay all that is owed or show proof that she is the victim of fraud and that is why she could not make her payment on time and in full includingate fees. Highly doubt that her account information was stolen, but if it was it is a very lame place to be in and I feel it is reasonable to wave fees under those circumstances.

I can give her two more days to get things figured out.

Financially I need three families to pay my bills, I only have three enrolled right now. We have emergency savings we can use if we must, but would rather not have to get into it. I am interviewing but have had a terrible luck with families after enrollment. They are all sorts of golden until they start, Try to break policy/ I realize they have lied to me during interview/ realize that I am in fact charging the amount I said I was and They can't afford it/ don't want to pay, and once I apply my backbone they are gone within 1-3 days.

If DCM gets everything squared away with me she'll be on A one strike and she's out timeframe.
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Denali 01:35 PM 09-12-2016
Originally Posted by Nurse Jackie:
I thought she said she was only $8 short. Anywho way to grow a back bone . Sounds like you're done letting people take advantage of you. Like blackcat said on another post as long as you look at it as they're stealing from your family, which technically they are, it's easy to go mama bear on them. It's ok to feel sorry for parents financial problems however this is a business. I have financial problems too that's why I'm working. Pay me on time the same way you expect your place of employment to pay you.
Yes if I waive the fees due to fraud on her account then she'll only owe Me $8. Which will be added onto her 23rd payment as long as her fraud claim is true. If she ever tries to short me again on future payments I will turn away at the door regardless of whether it's a dollar or not. At that point it Will be the principle of the fact and her just trying to be the boss.
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Unregistered 10:39 PM 09-12-2016
Originally Posted by Denali:
Yes if I waive the fees due to fraud on her account then she'll only owe Me $8. Which will be added onto her 23rd payment as long as her fraud claim is true. If she ever tries to short me again on future payments I will turn away at the door regardless of whether it's a dollar or not. At that point it Will be the principle of the fact and her just trying to be the boss.
Not to be mean, and I'm a different unregistered, but I doubt you have the ability to turn them anyway. It said a lot to me that you were giving her dirty looks and clearly annoyed she was short, but when she said two days you caved in.
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Ariana 10:03 AM 09-13-2016
Originally Posted by Snowmom:
So... they can afford a new puppy but not daycare? Classy.
Bingo! Ladies we all know this is not about financial problems. This is about DCP not enforcing he rules and psychopathic parents who simply don't WANT to pay.

OP stop telling yourself you are the marshmallow of the family. Ever see a marshmallow after it has been left out for a while on your counter? It becomes hard as a rock. This woman is a psychopath. She is using you. You can stand up for yourself and the amount of confidence you will gain will be tremendous, what is the worst thag can happen? She will be angry at you? Big effing deal!
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Denali 10:05 AM 09-13-2016
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Not to be mean, and I'm a different unregistered, but I doubt you have the ability to turn them anyway. It said a lot to me that you were giving her dirty looks and clearly annoyed she was short, but when she said two days you caved in.
I am fully prepared to deny care Thursday morning is she doesn't provide proof of fraud on her account or pay the full amount owed including fees. 2 days vs a month of providing care for free is a big difference. I do also still have the check as she said I could keep if for the 23rd payment.

It will cover some of what she owes if I cash it Thursday night to cover the fees. If she doesn't pay me at all ever than it wouldn't cover all of it, but it will be something. Alaska pfd's come out in October. So unless The account is closed ( which no one closes their counts during PFD time unless the bank closes it on you). As sleazy as that might make me feel, she would owe me the money that the check is written for and I have the right to collect it if I have the means to do so. If I have to do this than care will be terminated.

I am serious about 'slapping' her in the face with the rule book and taking her to court if I must. They are not PCS'ing until April. I have confirmed this.

If she pays me then that will buy me time to find a family to replace her and not put me in any real financial hardship. I would like to avoid that if at all possible. But I'm not going to work for free passed the two days that I've given her. If she actually had fraud on her account then by Thursday not only would she have her husband's paycheck but the bank should have credited her the money that was stolen. Do not pay me Thursday all that is owed would simply mean that she lied about the fraud and care would terminated. I would either cash the check to get what I'm owed or proceed to small claims court.

Though that is a question I should ask you guys. If I don't get paid Thursday would you take the check I have and cash it to get the money owed or file a small claims straight off the bat?
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Ariana 10:07 AM 09-13-2016
It is NOT reasonable to waive fees for any reason! If she called her electric company and said "I can't pay my bill because my account has been hacked" do you think they would care?

The faster you understabd that she doesn't want to pay you the faster this will all end.
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Unregistered 11:58 AM 09-13-2016
Originally Posted by Denali:
I am fully prepared to deny care Thursday morning is she doesn't provide proof of fraud on her account or pay the full amount owed including fees. 2 days vs a month of providing care for free is a big difference. I do also still have the check as she said I could keep if for the 23rd payment.

It will cover some of what she owes if I cash it Thursday night to cover the fees. If she doesn't pay me at all ever than it wouldn't cover all of it, but it will be something. Alaska pfd's come out in October. So unless The account is closed ( which no one closes their counts during PFD time unless the bank closes it on you). As sleazy as that might make me feel, she would owe me the money that the check is written for and I have the right to collect it if I have the means to do so. If I have to do this than care will be terminated.

I am serious about 'slapping' her in the face with the rule book and taking her to court if I must. They are not PCS'ing until April. I have confirmed this.

If she pays me then that will buy me time to find a family to replace her and not put me in any real financial hardship. I would like to avoid that if at all possible. But I'm not going to work for free passed the two days that I've given her. If she actually had fraud on her account then by Thursday not only would she have her husband's paycheck but the bank should have credited her the money that was stolen. Do not pay me Thursday all that is owed would simply mean that she lied about the fraud and care would terminated. I would either cash the check to get what I'm owed or proceed to small claims court.

Though that is a question I should ask you guys. If I don't get paid Thursday would you take the check I have and cash it to get the money owed or file a small claims straight off the bat?
Honestly, the first time I cashed the check and it bounced, I would have taken her to small claims with this history. You keep drawing lines and she keeps crossing them. This about can you follow your own rules?
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sharlan 12:09 PM 09-13-2016
I bet she puts a stop payment on the check.
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Meeko 01:04 PM 09-13-2016
OK..so this is a military family?

I started daycare while my husband served in the USAF. I only tended USAF children.

It was 30 years ago and back then, it was the norm for parents to pay AFTER care had been provided.

But it was NEVER a problem. Why? Because every airman knew that all I had to do was pick up the phone and make a call to their squadron commander to let them know if I wasn't paid. Bad debt is VERY SERIOUSLY frowned upon by the military. A guy in my husband's squadron was let go with a dishonorable discharge for bad debt.

I made sure clients knew I wasn't scared to call their commander if I didn't get paid. Could you do the same?
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Denali 02:11 PM 09-13-2016
Originally Posted by Meeko:
OK..so this is a military family?

I started daycare while my husband served in the USAF. I only tended USAF children.

It was 30 years ago and back then, it was the norm for parents to pay AFTER care had been provided.

But it was NEVER a problem. Why? Because every airman knew that all I had to do was pick up the phone and make a call to their squadron commander to let them know if I wasn't paid. Bad debt is VERY SERIOUSLY frowned upon by the military. A guy in my husband's squadron was let go with a dishonorable discharge for bad debt.

I made sure clients knew I wasn't scared to call their commander if I didn't get paid. Could you do the same?
I should be able to yes. I've seen it done before and have been told I should if I'm not paid Thursday.

I should having 2 new DCG's starting soon. 1 Thursday and another Monday (different families). But we'll see. I also have an interview this afternoon for a family with 2 children. If any of them work out than this family with be gone.
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Denali 02:21 PM 09-13-2016
Originally Posted by Denali:
I should be able to yes. I've seen it done before and have been told I should if I'm not paid Thursday.

I should having 2 new DCG's starting soon. 1 Thursday and another Monday (different families). But we'll see. I also have an interview this afternoon for a family with 2 children. If any of them work out than this family with be gone.
Meant that to say:
If any of them work out than this family with be gone Even if they pay me this Thursday.
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Unregistered 11:09 AM 09-15-2016
It's Thursday any update?? Did they bring what they owed??
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LostMyMarbles 12:48 PM 09-15-2016
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
It's Thursday any update?? Did they bring what they owed??

Oh yea...we need our fix
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Pestle 01:27 PM 09-15-2016
I really really really want the update to end with "so I repossessed her puppy."
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LostMyMarbles 01:39 PM 09-15-2016
Originally Posted by Pestle:
I really really really want the update to end with "so I repossessed her puppy."

Lmao.....this is the funniest thing I have read on this forum....
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Controlled Chaos 01:49 PM 09-15-2016
Originally Posted by Pestle:
I really really really want the update to end with "so I repossessed her puppy."

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Denali 09:32 PM 09-15-2016
Originally Posted by Pestle:
I really really really want the update to end with "so I repossessed her puppy."
That, would be awesome. I would totally do that.

It's been a busy day, 2 new kids started, and supposedly I have a third coming to drop off paperwork tomorrow that wants to start Monday. One kid will most likely not work out as DCM has already tried to short me money. This is the one that told me "I'm not sure if DCD will be ok with the enrollment fee..." so yea, tried to hand me a check without it, told her the check was short and she responded with "oh I was sure that was the right amount..." than asked if she could pay me it next payday. I smiled and told her " no problem! We can just start care than if I still have the space!"

Funny how fast she whipped out the check book to write me another check. But yeah, not impressed with her right now. Funny how I seem to have backbone is all sorts of ways with these new families, but not really with the old ones

The family starting Monday wanted to pay on the 29th, but start yesterday, I was firm when I said nope. I get paid before I provide care. For her interview she took one step into my home and said she wanted to start, didn't even need to look around or look at my policies. Wanted to start as soon as she could...

Not holding my breath in her working out either. I'll be meeting the kid tomorrow afternoon.

So anyway, update:

Mom dropped off this morning and paid $120.00. So she is paid up until the 23rd. She is on her last straw and she knows it. Also Reminded her to make sure to bring the proof of fraud so I can wave all her late payment fees and her return check fee that she owes me, she gave me a "what? You were serious??" Look.

We'll see.
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Pestle 03:56 AM 09-16-2016
"Here; raise my offspring. Wait, you think I'll pay you for this?! Hahahahaha! No. Well, take good care of them!"

What kind of care do these people end up with, anyway? I had an experience with a scatterbrained part-time dad who used the scatterbrainedness as an excuse to avoid paying . . . one day I got up in his face and told him he couldn't leave his son without paying, and he pulled $3 out of his pocket. I said, "You still owe me $37," and he added five bucks and ran out the door. This was drop off. He dropped his kid and bolted. That was the last day he came . . . I shudder to think about the kind of care his son must be getting now.
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Mike 07:18 AM 09-16-2016
Originally Posted by Pestle:
"Here; raise my offspring. Wait, you think I'll pay you for this?! Hahahahaha! No. Well, take good care of them!"

What kind of care do these people end up with, anyway? I had an experience with a scatterbrained part-time dad who used the scatterbrainedness as an excuse to avoid paying . . . one day I got up in his face and told him he couldn't leave his son without paying, and he pulled $3 out of his pocket. I said, "You still owe me $37," and he added five bucks and ran out the door. This was drop off. He dropped his kid and bolted. That was the last day he came . . . I shudder to think about the kind of care his son must be getting now.
I worry about that too, people who will drop their kid off with anyone who will watch them for next to nothing.
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DaveA 08:21 AM 09-16-2016
Originally Posted by Mike:
I worry about that too, people who will drop their kid off with anyone who will watch them for next to nothing.
I have to distance myself from it, or it drives me nuts. I just focus on how I do my stuff. There's a center in the area that is everything I don't like about childcare. They do just enough to stay out of trouble/ not get shut down. I (kind of) joke with DW about staging a coup and take it over. I can't spend time worrying about it or I'd be out front picketing.
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daycarediva 10:56 AM 09-16-2016
Originally Posted by Pestle:
I really really really want the update to end with "so I repossessed her puppy."

HAHAHA!!!!!!!!

Can you imagine, holding the puppy as collateral? LOL!!!

I say replace, regardless.

Also, it's easier with new families because you are starting fresh. They know no other 'you'. I find the first few weeks to be the defining of the relationship period and pretty much sets the tone for the rest of the time they are enrolled.
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Tags:checks - post dated, money owed, payment - delayed
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