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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Am I Just Not Cut Out For This Age?
WImom 07:50 AM 10-17-2013
I haven't had a two year old in a few years but I don't remember having so many problems. I'm I just not cut out for this age or is this particular child just a challenge?
This happens every day all day - Scream/squeeling, Throwing toys, touching EVERYTHING!, putting EVERYTHING in his mouth, doesn't listen to me at all. I put him at the table with a book since he keeps throwing toys at kids and he threw the book and keeps climbing under the table. If I put him in the superyard he throws those toys out at the kids, then take all his clothes off and throws those out.
I got the superyard so I can help kids in the bathroom, or have somewhere for him to play for 5-10 minutes while I work with the older kids (I do give him a change staying out but if he keeps bothering the other kids playing then I will put him in there w/toys)
He chews on board books, he rips board books. He rips all stickers off toys, my wood kitchen, etc. It seems like he just does what he pleases. I've been trying to give him basic - you do this, this happens, two choices, telling him a firm "No". Redirecting, etc. It's been 2 months but if anything it's worse.
He was running out my front door without mom until recently when I had to take control and discipline him in front of mom.
Any tips for a VERY curious/busy two year boy I am all ears!!!
This happens every day all day - Scream/squeeling, Throwing toys, touching EVERYTHING!, putting EVERYTHING in his mouth, doesn't listen to me at all. I put him at the table with a book since he keeps throwing toys at kids and he threw the book and keeps climbing under the table. If I put him in the superyard he throws those toys out at the kids, then take all his clothes off and throws those out.
I got the superyard so I can help kids in the bathroom, or have somewhere for him to play for 5-10 minutes while I work with the older kids (I do give him a change staying out but if he keeps bothering the other kids playing then I will put him in there w/toys)
He chews on board books, he rips board books. He rips all stickers off toys, my wood kitchen, etc. It seems like he just does what he pleases. I've been trying to give him basic - you do this, this happens, two choices, telling him a firm "No". Redirecting, etc. It's been 2 months but if anything it's worse.
He was running out my front door without mom until recently when I had to take control and discipline him in front of mom.
Any tips for a VERY curious/busy two year boy I am all ears!!!
CedarCreek 08:07 AM 10-17-2013
I have one like this. What I have found that works with him is redirecting him to an activity I know will keep his attention. For example, he likes trains. I set him up with one of the "take and go" train tracks we have and a box of trains and he is entertained for a bit.
Then I rotate to Legos, then cars with the elevator garage.
I put all books out of the kids reach and they have to ask for them. He unfortunately does not get one. I tell him that when he can be gentle with the books, he can have one. Same with toys, if he throws them he doesn't get that toy again today.
This age can be tough because they are trying to learn how to communicate and where the boundaries are.
Then I rotate to Legos, then cars with the elevator garage.
I put all books out of the kids reach and they have to ask for them. He unfortunately does not get one. I tell him that when he can be gentle with the books, he can have one. Same with toys, if he throws them he doesn't get that toy again today.
This age can be tough because they are trying to learn how to communicate and where the boundaries are.
Sunshine75 08:20 AM 10-17-2013
This is rather hilarious because I just posted about this as well with the 13 month toddler I have! I was just saying- "is his behaviour an indicator of how he will be as he gets older?" I am inclined to think yes, only more of a handful. He screams, pokes baby and wants to get all my attention 100 percent of the time and if he doesn't watch out! I completely understand where you are coming from. I am not used to children like him. I think all children are different and all daycare providers are different and the best we can do is decide if we can raise, essentially, a child who is strong-willed and determined or if they need to be with someone else who maybe is a better fit. Your little guy wants to rule the roost and as a daycare provider with little ones like this our hands are essentially tied because we have very limited options for discipline. Time outs, redirection, saying "no"-lol, as if that makes a difference. That is it. Maybe taking away a favorite toy but then everyone is penalized. I feel for you and know you are not alone. Somehow you have to speak to his heart because until it matters to him to be a good listener, kind to others, share, etc it really won't matter. Do you have any books that talk about character traits like kindness, sharing, etc?
LK5kids 08:21 AM 10-17-2013
In all the years I did FCC I never had such a young group as I do now. When I did FCC years ago the last four/five years were all 3-4-5's yr olds. When I opened again last winter all my kids were 2 and under and all in diapers. I felt like the town diaper changer. Long winter.
I wasn't sure I was cut out for all young kiddos either!
Luckily two are now trained, a young two started in June and was trained and an older four started at the same time.
It was a shock to my system! I'm just coming out of it!! My kids are finally doing some creative play, building with blocks, etc.
I dearly love all my kiddos. I have a great group, but it has been tough going.
hugs to you. I find it does get better. I know I had to adapt some of my space and expectations.
I wasn't sure I was cut out for all young kiddos either!
Luckily two are now trained, a young two started in June and was trained and an older four started at the same time.
It was a shock to my system! I'm just coming out of it!! My kids are finally doing some creative play, building with blocks, etc.
I dearly love all my kiddos. I have a great group, but it has been tough going.
hugs to you. I find it does get better. I know I had to adapt some of my space and expectations.
wdmmom 08:39 AM 10-17-2013
I have one like this. She's been a PITA since DAY 1!!!
She was a VERY colicky baby and screamed for no reason all day, everyday. It got to the point where I would have no choice but to lay her down and walk away. She was the same way at home. DCM had a breakdown each and everyday because caring for this child was extremely stressful.
As she got older, she grew out of it but it was about 9 months of constant unhappiness and screaming. Not crying but screaming!
She just turned 2 in August and she's still a handful! Good thing her older sister has the patience she does and doesn't go walloping on her every chance she gets because she still defies. She takes toys, she screams at nap in hopes of waking other kids up, she can't sleep on a cot because she can't be trusted, she still sticks her hands in her mouth, toys in her mouth and drools profusely, she likes telling me "No" to which I scared the begeezus out of her last week for it and she hasn't done it since.
There comes a point where Bad guy/Good guy has to work and with her, she gets to see that I won't be walked over or defied and that the consequences are not worth the risk.
I have never, ever had a kid think they could tell me "No" and get away with it and she surely isn't my first rodeo.
Hold on to your hat, it's going to be a rough ride!
She was a VERY colicky baby and screamed for no reason all day, everyday. It got to the point where I would have no choice but to lay her down and walk away. She was the same way at home. DCM had a breakdown each and everyday because caring for this child was extremely stressful.
As she got older, she grew out of it but it was about 9 months of constant unhappiness and screaming. Not crying but screaming!
She just turned 2 in August and she's still a handful! Good thing her older sister has the patience she does and doesn't go walloping on her every chance she gets because she still defies. She takes toys, she screams at nap in hopes of waking other kids up, she can't sleep on a cot because she can't be trusted, she still sticks her hands in her mouth, toys in her mouth and drools profusely, she likes telling me "No" to which I scared the begeezus out of her last week for it and she hasn't done it since.
There comes a point where Bad guy/Good guy has to work and with her, she gets to see that I won't be walked over or defied and that the consequences are not worth the risk.
I have never, ever had a kid think they could tell me "No" and get away with it and she surely isn't my first rodeo.
Hold on to your hat, it's going to be a rough ride!
melilley 10:26 AM 10-17-2013
All but one of my dck's are 2 and under! I have one that acts just like your dck, plus mine can be mean. I call him my tornado. He scream cries, throws toys, throws fits, hits and pushes, puts everything in his mouth, used to bite etc... Most of this is normal for this age, except for the meanness, but mom and I are working together to curb it.
When the child scream/cries I have him sit in the hallway until he is done. It seems young to do this, but when I tell him to do so, he knows right where to go! I only do it for him to calm down and to save our hearing.
Sometimes I have to shadow him (I used to have to all the time, but he is sorta getting better) depending on how he is acting. I also am constantly telling him to not put toys in his mouth, to use nice touches, please don't throw the toys, blah, blah, blah, it's never ending!
I think 2 (and 3) can be a tough age, it just depends on the temperament of the child. I also have another 2 year old here and he is totally opposite! He does put things in his mouth, but other than that, he is a great little boy!
When the child scream/cries I have him sit in the hallway until he is done. It seems young to do this, but when I tell him to do so, he knows right where to go! I only do it for him to calm down and to save our hearing.
Sometimes I have to shadow him (I used to have to all the time, but he is sorta getting better) depending on how he is acting. I also am constantly telling him to not put toys in his mouth, to use nice touches, please don't throw the toys, blah, blah, blah, it's never ending!
I think 2 (and 3) can be a tough age, it just depends on the temperament of the child. I also have another 2 year old here and he is totally opposite! He does put things in his mouth, but other than that, he is a great little boy!
JoseyJo 10:59 AM 10-17-2013
Originally Posted by melilley:
I think 2 (and 3) can be a tough age, it just depends on the temperament of the child. I also have another 2 year old here and he is totally opposite! He does put things in his mouth, but other than that, he is a great little boy!
We have a new 18 mo and new 23 mo, haven't had under 2.5 in 4 years here!I think 2 (and 3) can be a tough age, it just depends on the temperament of the child. I also have another 2 year old here and he is totally opposite! He does put things in his mouth, but other than that, he is a great little boy!
I totally agree, can be a tough age BUT it isn't that hard w/ every 2 yo. We have some problems w/ dumping bins and *very* short attention spans, but no hitting, kicking, biting, etc (at least not more than 1 or 2 times to figure out that it is NOT acceptable here!) - those are more related to personality and upbringing than just age IMO.
melilley 12:15 PM 10-17-2013
Originally Posted by JoseyJo:
We have a new 18 mo and new 23 mo, haven't had under 2.5 in 4 years here!
I totally agree, can be a tough age BUT it isn't that hard w/ every 2 yo. We have some problems w/ dumping bins and *very* short attention spans, but no hitting, kicking, biting, etc (at least not more than 1 or 2 times to figure out that it is NOT acceptable here!) - those are more related to personality and upbringing than just age IMO.
True! My 2 yr old that is mean is going through a divorce. From what the mom says, she left the dad because he was abusive to her. I don't know if she means physically or mentally, but I'm sure some of my dck's meanness comes from seeing things if it was physical.We have a new 18 mo and new 23 mo, haven't had under 2.5 in 4 years here!
I totally agree, can be a tough age BUT it isn't that hard w/ every 2 yo. We have some problems w/ dumping bins and *very* short attention spans, but no hitting, kicking, biting, etc (at least not more than 1 or 2 times to figure out that it is NOT acceptable here!) - those are more related to personality and upbringing than just age IMO.