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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>This Child Is Gonna Give Me Grey Hair!!
mommiesherie 10:34 AM 11-21-2011
Decided this afternoon that I am going to have to go ahead and advertise. I will fill his and his brothers spot with just one child. At nap time I'm going to work on an add. Just can't let one child continue to hit and show aggressive and bad behaviors. I'm small and like it that way. I just have 4 kids but this will cut it down to 3 plus my 6 year old. I can take them places with that group. I hate it but I am just not equipped with the skills to deal with this child. This morning when his mom brought him he takes off running out the door in the rain while mom chased him. Lol ugh this is one of the problems with this child he does whatever he wants at home. My 6 year old would appreciate an older little girl to play with. Probably 4 years old or so would be greeeeaaat! Keeping my fingers crossed on it. I just know that I can't do the difficult one any longer. If I have to loose 120 a week then so be it. I don't count on it for bills anyways. It almost feels like I have failed because I have never had a child I couldn't care for.
Heidi 10:51 AM 11-21-2011
Is this the little guy who may also be intellectually gifted?
If so, read this:
http://www.stephanietolan.com/is_it_a_cheetah.htm
here is a great website for parents and educators of gifted children:
http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/characteristics.htm
I know terminating will be tough. It may be easier for his parents to hear if you tell them you suspect he may be gifted. Young Bart Simpson may do better in a program designed for young Bart Simpsons, if such a thing exists in your community!
I had a child like him many years ago that I terminated. I really felt I could not meet his needs in my program. He is now 13, and once identified as gifted (by his school system), did much better.
Good luck to you in your search for a new client that is a better fit. Best wishes to this family who will hopefully find what their child needs.
If so, read this:
http://www.stephanietolan.com/is_it_a_cheetah.htm
here is a great website for parents and educators of gifted children:
http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/characteristics.htm
I know terminating will be tough. It may be easier for his parents to hear if you tell them you suspect he may be gifted. Young Bart Simpson may do better in a program designed for young Bart Simpsons, if such a thing exists in your community!
I had a child like him many years ago that I terminated. I really felt I could not meet his needs in my program. He is now 13, and once identified as gifted (by his school system), did much better.
Good luck to you in your search for a new client that is a better fit. Best wishes to this family who will hopefully find what their child needs.
Kaddidle Care 10:59 AM 11-21-2011
Gifted or not, he still needs to learn how to listen and be safe. If he's a spontaneous runner leaving your place or arriving then Mom needs to hold his hand until he can be trusted. It's why God made hands IMHO. The gifted child needs to learn to read faces, they need to learn things that to others may be common sense.
If his own Mom doesn't have a handle on it then it's not a good sign. Not worth the liability.
If his own Mom doesn't have a handle on it then it's not a good sign. Not worth the liability.
mommiesherie 11:02 AM 11-21-2011
Originally Posted by bbo:
Is this the little guy who may also be intellectually gifted?
If so, read this:
http://www.stephanietolan.com/is_it_a_cheetah.htm
here is a great website for parents and educators of gifted children:
http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/characteristics.htm
I know terminating will be tough. It may be easier for his parents to hear if you tell them you suspect he may be gifted. Young Bart Simpson may do better in a program designed for young Bart Simpsons, if such a thing exists in your community!
I had a child like him many years ago that I terminated. I really felt I could not meet his needs in my program. He is now 13, and once identified as gifted (by his school system), did much better.
Good luck to you in your search for a new client that is a better fit. Best wishes to this family who will hopefully find what their child needs.
It is that child. I will go read that. I asked his mom when I was putting him in his car seat friday if she had ever suspected that he is gifted. She said his dad is very intelligent. I will stick in there for a short time to see if I can fill spot because its so close to christmas and I can use the cash. Knowing its just until the first of the year will help though. I am gonna have to just be sure he is playing by himself all the time so he isn't hurting anyone else in the process. I hate it but I have to protect others and he has to know its not okIs this the little guy who may also be intellectually gifted?
If so, read this:
http://www.stephanietolan.com/is_it_a_cheetah.htm
here is a great website for parents and educators of gifted children:
http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/characteristics.htm
I know terminating will be tough. It may be easier for his parents to hear if you tell them you suspect he may be gifted. Young Bart Simpson may do better in a program designed for young Bart Simpsons, if such a thing exists in your community!
I had a child like him many years ago that I terminated. I really felt I could not meet his needs in my program. He is now 13, and once identified as gifted (by his school system), did much better.
Good luck to you in your search for a new client that is a better fit. Best wishes to this family who will hopefully find what their child needs.
cheerfuldom 11:08 AM 11-21-2011
I agree with Kaddidle....even if this child is "gifted" in some way, that does not excuse the behavior or mean that the provider is then expected to alter her services to his needs. If he doesn't fit in well with her program, which seems to be the case, it would be in the best interest of everyone that he move on to a situation that does fit. I agree with the link that not every child is perfectly situated to fit into traditional environments, like a classic school environment, but if a kid needs something else, it is the parent's responsibility to figure that out and find it for him. On a different note, I am sure we all know children that are not gifted in anyway, they are just regular kids that need structure and consistency to change their bad behavior. (I am not implying that that OP does not have structure or consistency....but the parents may be creating a little monster)
Heidi 12:47 PM 11-21-2011
Oh, I wasn't saying that because he is gifted, he doesn't need to follow the rules, or can go around clobbering people! 
There are some children who aren't a good mix for us. I personally, adore gifted school-agers, but have struggled with a few preschoolers over the years with the same label. They can be extremely sensitive, or extremely contrary. They can be "Bart Simpson", as I said earlier. They may potty train themselves at 18 months, read at 3, but also be aggressive and not "get" some things.
There are people with many types of abilities. There are people with special needs. I would say that we need to acknowledge that, but it does not excuse poor behavior. If a child is developmentally delayed, for example, we wouldn't say "hey, you are special, you can go around hitting everyone". But, we would understand that it is part of their condition, and maybe give a little consideration.
Another possibility is that he may have sensitivities. He might perceive light, sound, or touch much more than most of us do (sensory integration issues).
OP needs to decide if she has the interest, ability, and resources to deal with all this. It's ok if she doesnt! I don't know if I would! If not, then she needs to be honest, and use whatever resources she can find to get through until then. If she tell the parents what she sees, they may be able to find a better fit for him vs. him going through one dc after another for the next year-and-a-half.
Gosh, I didn't mean to give a speech, just trying to clarify!
There are some children who aren't a good mix for us. I personally, adore gifted school-agers, but have struggled with a few preschoolers over the years with the same label. They can be extremely sensitive, or extremely contrary. They can be "Bart Simpson", as I said earlier. They may potty train themselves at 18 months, read at 3, but also be aggressive and not "get" some things.
There are people with many types of abilities. There are people with special needs. I would say that we need to acknowledge that, but it does not excuse poor behavior. If a child is developmentally delayed, for example, we wouldn't say "hey, you are special, you can go around hitting everyone". But, we would understand that it is part of their condition, and maybe give a little consideration.
Another possibility is that he may have sensitivities. He might perceive light, sound, or touch much more than most of us do (sensory integration issues).
OP needs to decide if she has the interest, ability, and resources to deal with all this. It's ok if she doesnt! I don't know if I would! If not, then she needs to be honest, and use whatever resources she can find to get through until then. If she tell the parents what she sees, they may be able to find a better fit for him vs. him going through one dc after another for the next year-and-a-half.
Gosh, I didn't mean to give a speech, just trying to clarify!
mommiesherie 01:28 PM 11-21-2011
Originally Posted by bbo:
Oh, I wasn't saying that because he is gifted, he doesn't need to follow the rules, or can go around clobbering people!
There are some children who aren't a good mix for us. I personally, adore gifted school-agers, but have struggled with a few preschoolers over the years with the same label. They can be extremely sensitive, or extremely contrary. They can be "Bart Simpson", as I said earlier. They may potty train themselves at 18 months, read at 3, but also be aggressive and not "get" some things.
There are people with many types of abilities. There are people with special needs. I would say that we need to acknowledge that, but it does not excuse poor behavior. If a child is developmentally delayed, for example, we wouldn't say "hey, you are special, you can go around hitting everyone". But, we would understand that it is part of their condition, and maybe give a little consideration.
Another possibility is that he may have sensitivities. He might perceive light, sound, or touch much more than most of us do (sensory integration issues).
OP needs to decide if she has the interest, ability, and resources to deal with all this. It's ok if she doesnt! I don't know if I would! If not, then she needs to be honest, and use whatever resources she can find to get through until then. If she tell the parents what she sees, they may be able to find a better fit for him vs. him going through one dc after another for the next year-and-a-half.
Gosh, I didn't mean to give a speech, just trying to clarify!
I honestly just don't have the want to. Lol. I mean at one point in my life I would have but at this moment I just want a small group ok kids that are not demons. Lol. At first I would talk to mom about his behavior but found out it did nothing but go in one ear and out the other. I think a lot of his issue is parents allowing bad behavior. The other is I do think he is gifted and needs challenged more than I am willing to do. I hate to loose his infant sibling because he is precious but yeah I'm gonna have to terminate. If I can replace that's great and if not oh well. Today I told him to go to the potty. He protested because he doesn't like to go. Sent him in there he refused to go and stood in front of toilet and peed in his pants. He know better. He is smart very smart. I swear I think he just does stuff to pi** me off. Lol he really is potty trained and knows when he has to go. He just is defiant and was gonna win that fight. He will try to win at all costOh, I wasn't saying that because he is gifted, he doesn't need to follow the rules, or can go around clobbering people!
There are some children who aren't a good mix for us. I personally, adore gifted school-agers, but have struggled with a few preschoolers over the years with the same label. They can be extremely sensitive, or extremely contrary. They can be "Bart Simpson", as I said earlier. They may potty train themselves at 18 months, read at 3, but also be aggressive and not "get" some things.
There are people with many types of abilities. There are people with special needs. I would say that we need to acknowledge that, but it does not excuse poor behavior. If a child is developmentally delayed, for example, we wouldn't say "hey, you are special, you can go around hitting everyone". But, we would understand that it is part of their condition, and maybe give a little consideration.
Another possibility is that he may have sensitivities. He might perceive light, sound, or touch much more than most of us do (sensory integration issues).
OP needs to decide if she has the interest, ability, and resources to deal with all this. It's ok if she doesnt! I don't know if I would! If not, then she needs to be honest, and use whatever resources she can find to get through until then. If she tell the parents what she sees, they may be able to find a better fit for him vs. him going through one dc after another for the next year-and-a-half.
Gosh, I didn't mean to give a speech, just trying to clarify!
Heidi 10:53 AM 11-21-2011
Originally Posted by mommiesherie:
Decided this afternoon that I am going to have to go ahead and advertise. I will fill his and his brothers spot with just one child. At nap time I'm going to work on an add. Just can't let one child continue to hit and show aggressive and bad behaviors. I'm small and like it that way. I just have 4 kids but this will cut it down to 3 plus my 6 year old. I can take them places with that group. I hate it but I am just not equipped with the skills to deal with this child. This morning when his mom brought him he takes off running out the door in the rain while mom chased him. Lol ugh this is one of the problems with this child he does whatever he wants at home. My 6 year old would appreciate an older little girl to play with. Probably 4 years old or so would be greeeeaaat! Keeping my fingers crossed on it. I just know that I can't do the difficult one any longer. If I have to loose 120 a week then so be it. I don't count on it for bills anyways. It almost feels like I have failed because I have never had a child I couldn't care for.
I have to add this...Decided this afternoon that I am going to have to go ahead and advertise. I will fill his and his brothers spot with just one child. At nap time I'm going to work on an add. Just can't let one child continue to hit and show aggressive and bad behaviors. I'm small and like it that way. I just have 4 kids but this will cut it down to 3 plus my 6 year old. I can take them places with that group. I hate it but I am just not equipped with the skills to deal with this child. This morning when his mom brought him he takes off running out the door in the rain while mom chased him. Lol ugh this is one of the problems with this child he does whatever he wants at home. My 6 year old would appreciate an older little girl to play with. Probably 4 years old or so would be greeeeaaat! Keeping my fingers crossed on it. I just know that I can't do the difficult one any longer. If I have to loose 120 a week then so be it. I don't count on it for bills anyways. It almost feels like I have failed because I have never had a child I couldn't care for.
DO NOT feel bad because you failed. You did not fail. You know your limitations, and you want what is best for this little boy. What good would it do either one of you if you continued to muddle through? It can't be any fun for him, either, feeling misunderstood. You are doing the right thing for BOTH of you!
cheerfuldom 10:58 AM 11-21-2011
you ARE doing the right thing. the mature response is to know your limits and stop before you go over that. Plus you have to consider the other kids safety and environment. aggressive and rowdy behavior from one really does affect the rest.