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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Waking Up And Crying At Naptime?
makap 11:25 AM 02-29-2012
I am ready to freak out! I love my dcks but I have to eat, go pee and clean up. Also after 8 hours of not stopping to sit, eat or pee I deserve a bit of a break! Everyone who works gets a coffee break and a lunch break!

I start my day at 5 am. First dcb 18 months arrives at 6 am. I allow him to play a bit and then by 7 he has his breakfast and I have attempted many times to put him for an am nap but he will not nap. He either cries or just lays in his pnp. He never sleeps in the am at all. I was trying the am nap thinking that he was overtired by naptime and that is why he would wake after 1/2 hour and cry non stop! Also by 11 in the morning he is so tired, rubbing his eyes and crying.

I put him down today at 1 30 he has now been screaming at the top of his lungs for 30 minutes after only sleeping 20 minutes. He is in his own room but he just woke 1 of my dcks up after only 1/2 hour of him sleeping! (The one in the room closest to him)

Any advice? I am so ready to term! This is everyday!
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MNMum 11:33 AM 02-29-2012
I have had similar issues with my 18 month old. She is a fiesty non stop go getter. When she started here at 14 mos, I tried just one nap. She would only sleep about 45 minutes. So I tried 2 naps. Worked for about 2 days, then back to not sleeping. So I went back to just the afternoon nap, but let her go down 30 minutes before everyone else. That worked for a short while. I have tried letting her cry it out. She cries the remainder of nap. This is what is working now. Naptime here is 2 hours. If she wakes up before this I give her 5 minutes to try to settle herself. Then I go in, make sure it's not a diaper issue, lay her back down on her tummy, cover her, rub her back and say, "It's still naptime, nigh, nigh. All the kids are sleeping. I will come back when naptime is over." I leave. She is finally sleeping 2+ hours. I am finally getting a break.
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makap 11:48 AM 02-29-2012
Originally Posted by MNMum:
I have had similar issues with my 18 month old. She is a fiesty non stop go getter. When she started here at 14 mos, I tried just one nap. She would only sleep about 45 minutes. So I tried 2 naps. Worked for about 2 days, then back to not sleeping. So I went back to just the afternoon nap, but let her go down 30 minutes before everyone else. That worked for a short while. I have tried letting her cry it out. She cries the remainder of nap. This is what is working now. Naptime here is 2 hours. If she wakes up before this I give her 5 minutes to try to settle herself. Then I go in, make sure it's not a diaper issue, lay her back down on her tummy, cover her, rub her back and say, "It's still naptime, nigh, nigh. All the kids are sleeping. I will come back when naptime is over." I leave. She is finally sleeping 2+ hours. I am finally getting a break.
He is my only one who has ever done this! Well for this long. I have had others with sleep issues in the beginning however after a few weeks naptime was then fine. He is clearly very tired. He is tired most mornings when he arrives! I have tried everything! He will not settle on his own. If I go in he just lays there and screams regardless. I can rub his back or his head and he just screams. If I take him out and sit him in a chair with a snack he will still scream. I really do not want all 6 of my dcks up after only 1/2 hour of them sleeping.

He has been here for 9 months and is still doing this!
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MNMum 11:51 AM 02-29-2012
I'm sure others will add their expertise. Have you tried laying him back down immediately on arrival?
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Heidi 11:54 AM 02-29-2012
There was just a thread on this exact thing last week...I am trying to find it..
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Soupyszoo 11:59 AM 02-29-2012
Wow! He's been there 9 months and still having trouble? Have you mentioned to the dkps what's going on? I have the same issue with my 18 mo dcb. He's only been with me 5 months. His mom doesn't care about his nap problems so I've tried different things for my sanity. I try to be very consistent with him. I give him a little extra cool down time and cuddle time before naps now and that helps. He still wakes up hysterical sometimes. You definitely need and deserve a break. I get one very once in a while when the stars align perfectly with all the planets
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DCBlessings27 12:03 PM 02-29-2012
I just had a 13month old start a month ago. He was the same way--so tired but would just scream the whole nap time if in a pack n play. His parents told me what a great sleeper he was, yet I only got 20 mins out of him if that. He was waking up my other kids, which was not ok. I had taken care of his older brother for a year before he was born, so I didn't want to terminate him.

I finally started putting him to sleep on the couch. I then can move him after he's asleep. He seems to do better with this situation and is taking a long afternoon nap. (My state allows me to put kids to sleep on couch and then move once they're asleep.)
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Heidi 12:10 PM 02-29-2012
I just copied and pasted this from a previous answer, so change "she" to "he" :

Remember, at this age, receptive language is a whole lot better than her expressive language.

Lay her down for her nap when the others go down. Let her go last so she sees EVERYONE ELSE IS SLEEPING NOW. Put a fan in her room, put her in a sleep sack so you don't have to worry about her climbling out. Put another fan or other white noise in the hallway for a while so the others can't hear her.

THen lay her down; when she wakes up, give her back her stuffed animal or blanket or whatver she likes to cuddle, and whisper "it's still nap time, sweetie. Everyone is sleeping. I will come get you when nap time is over". Then stiick to that. Don't show her if you feel guilty, because she will pick up on that. Try to be matter-of-fact, hard as it is. She can choose to cry, or sleep, or play. She can understand what you are telling her. If she doesn't today, she will by the end of the week.

I have had several children who wake up after an hour, cry for a few minutes, and then go back to sleep. If she is taking one nap, they should be 2 1/2 to 3 hours.

Once you she's slept enough, go get her first, then get everyone else up (for a while) so that she knows she didn't miss out on anything.


You KNOW she needs more sleep. She will be happier if she has it. You DO know best, and she may not understand that, but you do!
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You could also turn set a clock-radio in there to whatever time nap is "over". This will help reinforce the concept..when the music plays, Miss. X will come get me.

He probably COULD use two naps considering how early he comes, but I wouldn't go through the fight 2x a day. Can you start nap 1/2 hour earlier for everyone so that it won't be such a long haul in the morning? You can always shift it later again once his sleep skills improve.
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SandeeAR 12:15 PM 02-29-2012
I have a dcg that will turn two in a few weeks. She just started sleeping for the entire 2hr nap about 2 weeks ago. Went thru all the stuff you mentioned and more. I have had her since 8 weeks old.

The truth finally came out of Mom a few months ago. Just as I knew.....she was being rocked to sleep and when she woke up at night, was being placed in their bed. I told Mom, there was NO WAY she would ever sleep here while she was doing that. I told Mom, it was no wonder she had made everyone mesirable here for over a year!

Mom finally stopped rocking her at night. She still spends a LOT of time in their bed.

She hasn't had a passy here for MANY months. (Stopped here LONG before at home). After Mom took it away at home, I gave it back at nap. Now she sleeps. She knows if she cries out or calls, I WILL take it away and she won't get it back.

She can have that passy here until she is 4-5 and leaves, as far as I'm concerned. She sleeps and so does everyone else!
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sariejohnston 12:41 PM 02-29-2012
I have the same thing happening in my room of 2 yr olds. i have at least 3 of them that do it almost everyday. :/ very stressful.
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Unregistered 12:49 PM 02-29-2012
I had a dcg just like this. When the children turn 18 months, I switch them to only one nap with everyone else. We eat lunch around 11:15 - 11:30 am and all kids are down and napping by 12:30.

This dcg would just scream ... literally for the whole 2 - 2 1/2 hours. I would always check on her about every half hour to make sure there wasn't something I could do (diaper change). Her parents had been bringing her into their bed every night when she woke.

Since I can not control what parents do with their children at their home, I just did what I thought was best and let her cry it out. It took a few days of no naps for anyone but eventually she understood she was not getting out of the pnp every time she cried. Now she sleeps 2 hours plus.

Her parents still bring her into their bed every night but she naps here just fine.

Kids are way smarter than we give them credit for and she knows what is going to happen when she cries at home (being brought into bed to cuddle and feed) and she knows what she will get when she cries here (nothing - at least not til nap time is over)!
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SunshineMama 12:50 PM 02-29-2012
I have not personally done this yet with my age range, but I know other providers who do lunch at 10:30, and then put the 18 month age range down for nap at 11:30, to get a solid 2 hours. I know it is very inconvenient at that time because the other kids dont usually nap until 1, but it does seem to work for them.
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makap 09:58 AM 03-01-2012
Thank you everyone for all of your replies and help.

It is 12 56 PM and this little boy is fast asleep!

Going to post an update as soon as all my dcks are sleeping! You guys are not going to believe this!

I think I know why he has been doing this.
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countrymom 10:35 AM 03-01-2012
now i'm really curious. Wait it can't be any worse than the 3 yr old I have that went to sleep at 2 o'clock in the morning because yesterday I didn't nap him (he plays with a schoolager) well apparently he "snuck" into bed at 6pm and slept till 9pm and was up. These people have no idea how to deal with night time with him, oh and they are expecting number 3 in april.
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frugalmama4 12:59 PM 03-01-2012
Thank you Thank you Thank you all!

I have been dealing with a 10mo dcb who does not sleep at all for about a month now. This kid makes me wanna cry...I have never been so anger with a baby before but this kid takes da cake....it's to the point that he will try a full to sleep in his high chair at lunch and I will make as much noise to keep he up (I have to walk my own kid to the bus stop at noon) so I can't afford him falling asleep before that other wise I would never get a break. He would not lay back down once I remove him from the stroller. It's so bad that when does fall out on the floor himself I'.m afraid to move him. He will cry for hours and hours, I'm trying so hard here not to term!

I think I will try some music tomorrow during nap time hopefully it helps. Thanks!
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frugalmama4 01:04 PM 03-01-2012
Oh, yeah while I'm the subject of this dcb, he doesn't eat either...not baby food/table nothing. I think his parents are quick to just give him a bottle and therefore his not use to eating solid food yet, I do give him baby food he takes maybe three bites and then spits it out...throws the table food to the floor.

I have two other babies well adjusted to eating table food this kids sees them and I know he wants some too...but every time I give him some he just spits/throws it out!!!!

I didn't know this home child care was ganna be sooooooooooooo hard.
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makap 03:03 PM 03-01-2012
Originally Posted by frugalmama4:
Thank you Thank you Thank you all!

I have been dealing with a 10mo dcb who does not sleep at all for about a month now. This kid makes me wanna cry...I have never been so anger with a baby before but this kid takes da cake....it's to the point that he will try a full to sleep in his high chair at lunch and I will make as much noise to keep he up (I have to walk my own kid to the bus stop at noon) so I can't afford him falling asleep before that other wise I would never get a break. He would not lay back down once I remove him from the stroller. It's so bad that when does fall out on the floor himself I'.m afraid to move him. He will cry for hours and hours, I'm trying so hard here not to term!

I think I will try some music tomorrow during nap time hopefully it helps. Thanks!
I am a bit disturbed by you saying you have never been so angry with a baby before!

It IS very difficult and exhausting when they will not sleep I really know it is, however you can not get angry at a baby. If you are finding that you are getting angry perhaps you really should term this one. I have been frustrated at times yes! OMG yes! But to get angry is not a good thing.

I had said in my orinal post that i was ready to "freak out" meaning pull my hair out, cry myself, even term, but before I ever got to the point where I was angry with a baby who knows hardly anything yet, I would term.

Can you please give us a bit more information? What time does he arrive in the morning? Can you give him a nap early am? At 10 months old he should be having a nap in the am as well as a nap in the afternoon. If he has an am nap then he most likely will not fall asleep when you need him to be awake.

As for eating, he is only 10 months old! I think this is normal baby behaviour! He is a little baby! Has only been alive for less than one year. Give him a bottle then if he won`t eat!

I have a 14 month old who I began care with 2 months ago who will not eat. He does not like the texture of foods. I am and I will continue to be patient, I still try everyday because he is just a baby. He is learning to like foods better each day. He will eat one day. I hope it is sooner rather than later but if not that's okay he will eat the way I would like him to when he is ready.

He would not hold his own bottle either at first which was frustrating for me at times because I also have 2 other littles who need help to eat. Mom admitted that she still held it for him but here I refused. I would not do it. I offered sippy cups and his bottle and after 2 weeks of me refusing to hold it for him he now holds it.

We have to be patient with babies and children if we choose to have children of our own or if we have chosen this work. They are so dependant for everything. They depend on us to love and care for them and keep them safe!

How would you feel if you left YOUR baby or young child with a person who felt the way you describe feeling towards this 10 month old?


I organize my day according to the needs of my children and everyday can be different. What I do with mine is feed them separately. I let the older kiddos play while I feed the babies. When the babies are happy and full and content then I feed the older kiddies. They may fuss and complain because I am busy and can not devote all of my time to them when I am busy but that is okay. They are learning. Learning to wait and learning to occupy themselves when I can't.

You say that you had no idea daycare could be so hard. How long have you been doing this. It does get better with practice. :-) It gets better for me everyday........... even after 20 years.

I absolutely love my days and love my families and love my kiddies so much!

Some days are much harder than others for sure! Its all about trial and error as all children are so different.

This is a wonderful site full of excellent advice and wonderful people. I have been reading advice on here for a long time and I have found great advice even though I have been in this field for so long. Just post and ask and you will get some wonderful ideas that you can try.

Just be patient with your babies. Your families have put their trust in you to care for and protect the most precious thing that they own.
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frugalmama4 04:56 PM 03-01-2012
Achelea,

Yes, I have been at this for just a short while now...I do know it takes time and patients.

Maybe I should have used a different word then angry (I could never be hateful/nasty towards a baby). I just meant the way things have been going with this one baby makes me angry because I have told the mom several times before about his sleeping issues and she just says " yea, that's my fault he still sleeps with me and I hold/rock/sing him to sleep. I tell her how hard it is on everyone here and ask if she could please start winging him off. He will not sleep in the am I have tried doesn't work with this baby at all.

I get maybe 30-45 minutes of sleep out of him...and as far as food go's yes I know he is only 10mos and it takes time...the thing is that mom doesn't try at all w/him so its left to me, I do give him bottles but that doesn't feel this kid up...and so I'm left fixing bottles all day!

I didn't mean to come across as a baby hater or anything...was just commenting on my current situation. Thank you for your feedback and advice!
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makap 05:26 PM 03-01-2012
Originally Posted by frugalmama4:
Achelea,

Yes, I have been at this for just a short while now...I do know it takes time and patients.

Maybe I should have used a different word then angry (I could never be hateful/nasty towards a baby). I just meant the way things have been going with this one baby makes me angry because I have told the mom several times before about his sleeping issues and she just says " yea, that's my fault he still sleeps with me and I hold/rock/sing him to sleep. I tell her how hard it is on everyone here and ask if she could please start winging him off. He will not sleep in the am I have tried doesn't work with this baby at all.

I get maybe 30-45 minutes of sleep out of him...and as far as food go's yes I know he is only 10mos and it takes time...the thing is that mom doesn't try at all w/him so its left to me, I do give him bottles but that doesn't feel this kid up...and so I'm left fixing bottles all day!

I didn't mean to come across as a baby hater or anything...was just commenting on my current situation. Thank you for your feedback and advice!
Oh trust me! I have gotten ANGRY with parents at times!
Thankfully the group I have now are really great!
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countrymom 06:49 PM 03-01-2012
Originally Posted by frugalmama4:
Oh, yeah while I'm the subject of this dcb, he doesn't eat either...not baby food/table nothing. I think his parents are quick to just give him a bottle and therefore his not use to eating solid food yet, I do give him baby food he takes maybe three bites and then spits it out...throws the table food to the floor.

I have two other babies well adjusted to eating table food this kids sees them and I know he wants some too...but every time I give him some he just spits/throws it out!!!!

I didn't know this home child care was ganna be sooooooooooooo hard.
oh honey I def. no your pain. I have one just like this except she has been with me for 6 months. I don't have the eating problem but now i have a sleeping problem with her. Suddenly she will wake up after 45min and scream and scream. For 2 weeks now, couldn't figure out why, but after I read this thread and did some scoping I found out that the parents can't take her crying so they are now rocking her to sleep and putting her in her own bed, and she is now 1yrs old. makes me so angry that she is also a spoiled brat of a child, yes people there are children who are like this, and I praying that the older she gets the better it'll be, but I blame the parents for making her this way. She will scream all day, cling to my legs, pull my shirt, shriek at the other kids if they come near her or touch her toys and cries like crazy at the other parents. I nothing works except if I carry her and i refuse to do this, oh she doesn't even know how to hold her own bottle and mom wants her on sippy cups????this is a child that I tolerate, and I have the right to do this. In my opinion, she needs a nanny all to herself but I know that no one will take this child on, no one has this much patience for her nonsense like I do, this is why I haven't termed.
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Tags:nap - crying, nap - disruptions, nap - early wake up
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