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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Director Doesn't Hit Or Touch The Children But Is Verbally Very Harsh
Elizabeth 05:49 PM 12-20-2010
In researching about proper and positive discipline in daycares, I came across daycare.com on the internet. I work at a small daycare (it is not listed with daycare.com) and the director is very strict with the children. For the first 45 minutes before the other caregivers start work, it is just the director and me looking after the children. She makes them watch TV and makes them sit still, no talking, not allowed to play quietly with toys nor even read a book. I supervise the children watching TV for about 20-30 minutes and I don't think it is appropriate to make young children (ages 1-4) sit still for more than 5-15 minutes.

This director doesn't hit or touch the children but is verbally very harsh. For example, she is always telling Bobby (not his real name) to sit still and be quiet and told me he will cause trouble. One time, Bobby came to daycare with a pencil and he was jumping around while holding his pencil. I asked him, "What would happen if you jump around with a pencil in your hand?" Bobby answered, "I might get hurt" I said, "That is right, you might hurt your eye or tummy. How about if you put your pencil on this shelf?" Bobby replied, "I will put my pencil in my cubby." And he did so. When Bobby came back, he was happy and bouncy and kind of skipped back to the room. The director yelled at Bobby, "Sit down, quit your jumping around." I tried to explain that Bobby made a right decision and she would not receive that info.

Another example, the director demanded to know who took a toy off the shelf during this time of TV watching. She then told the 4 year old boy, "Pick up the toy! Pick up the toy! Pick it up! Put it back and go sit down."

When the children come in from outdoors, they are not allowed to talk and often are made to walk down the hallway with their hands behind their backs. This may be appropriate for older children but for 3-4 year olds? The children are often crying after she yells at them and then she tells them to stop crying. I have never seen this director hug a child nor reassure a young child. I do think that young children (and even adults) need hugs from time to time.

I am my wits end because I can't prove to anyone that this harsh verbal yelling is going on because as soon as a parent entered the daycare (and we can hear them open the front door) she is nicer to the children and is very friendly to the parents. Some of the parents think she is wonderful because she has a good and friendly relationship with them, but as soon as all the parents have left the daycare, she is harsh with the children.

This is the second daycare I have worked at in less than a year. ( I homeschooled my children for about 13 years and now am back in the workforce. I love children and though working at a daycare would be wonderful.) This daycare is better than the previous daycare. At that daycare, a couple of caregivers would cover the older babies and toddlers' faces with their blankets to get them to take a nap. The nursery caregiver would put a 3 month old on the floor for tummy time and walk away while this baby was screaming. She said that the mom wanted her baby to do 15 min of tummy time. I am absolutely sure that this mom didn't want her baby left on the floor screaming and upset. The 4 year old teacher (who was the assistant director) would make these 4 year olds lie on their mats for 3 hours (nap time) without even allowing them to read a book, while she would talk or text on her cell phone. I do know that 4 year olds don't need 3 hour naps. And there were other issues such as some of the caregivers didn't have FBI clearance. This daycare was shut down a few weeks after I left.

Both daycares are licensed and are inspected on a regular basis. These directors know how to look good in front of parents and the inspectors. As a homeschool mom, I had issues with public schools but after working at these two daycares and hearing reports about daycares, it seems that daycares can be worse than public school. There needs to be a lot more accountability in daycares. I have told my children never to send my (future) grandchildren to a daycare unless they have cameras in every room.

It is indeed a challenge to ensure that ALL daycares are high quality and are caring, loving and kind places for young children.
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Tags:bad director, bad providers, vent, verbal abuse
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