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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Question about 4 year old
morgan24 09:23 AM 05-22-2017
Have you ever had a 4 year old girl become obsessed it's another girl. A little background on this child, she has always been timid. I have had her since she was 6 weeks old. She would cry if when parents picked up because they were strangers. She goes through times where she refuses to play at all and just watches the door for her Mom. When I mention anything to her Mom about her unusual behavior she googles it and sends me a bunch of articles about what the problem could be. During the winter she decided she didn't want to play and she just wanted to sit. I let her do that then she started being really rude to the other kids especially to 3 year old dcg. Her Mom picked up and she was rude to dcg and I told her she had been doing it a lot lately. Later I got a bunch of articles from dcm about how dcg has a introvert personality so she's really not being rude. The next day I told 4 year old dcg that she was done being rude and not playing. I didnt give her any choice. Every since then she is obsessed with the 3 year old dcg and tries to make her play with only her and what she wants to play. I separate them for most of the day because of it. I think she's very manipulative for a 4 year old but I never bring up anything to her Mom because she doesn't want to acknowledge it. She just wants to google it. Any thoughts?
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Annalee 09:36 AM 05-22-2017
Originally Posted by morgan24:
Have you ever had a 4 year old girl become obsessed it's another girl. A little background on this child, she has always been timid. I have had her since she was 6 weeks old. She would cry if when parents picked up because they were strangers. She goes through times where she refuses to play at all and just watches the door for her Mom. When I mention anything to her Mom about her unusual behavior she googles it and sends me a bunch of articles about what the problem could be. During the winter she decided she didn't want to play and she just wanted to sit. I let her do that then she started being really rude to the other kids especially to 3 year old dcg. Her Mom picked up and she was rude to dcg and I told her she had been doing it a lot lately. Later I got a bunch of articles from dcm about how dcg has a introvert personality so she's really not being rude. The next day I told 4 year old dcg that she was done being rude and not playing. I didnt give her any choice. Every since then she is obsessed with the 3 year old dcg and tries to make her play with only her and what she wants to play. I separate them for most of the day because of it. I think she's very manipulative for a 4 year old but I never bring up anything to her Mom because she doesn't want to acknowledge it. She just wants to google it. Any thoughts?
I don't think I would like those forward articles she has googled Or maybe I would come up with some resources to support your program and how you deal with children to give to her.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 11:12 AM 05-22-2017
Wow. Does she go to kinder soon, hopefully?

I would print off some articles yourself, like it was mentioned above.
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morgan24 02:23 PM 05-22-2017
Originally Posted by EntropyControlSpecialist:
Wow. Does she go to kinder soon, hopefully?

I would print off some articles yourself, like it was mentioned above.
She was suppose to go to preschool but dcm is afraid that with her personality she will be traumatized by the noise and chaos. I tried to tell her she needs the socializing preschool offers.

I tried giving her articles but she is what I call a google Mom. She googles it until she gets the answer she wants.
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trix23 09:22 PM 05-22-2017
What did she do that was rude? I've had my share of jerky 4 year olds... usually they are the ones that rule the household (vs the parents)
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morgan24 04:26 AM 05-23-2017
Originally Posted by trix23:
What did she do that was rude? I've had my share of jerky 4 year olds... usually they are the ones that rule the household (vs the parents)
She would tell the other dcg to shut up, leave her alone, and give her toys that she wanted. I don't usually use time out but I would have her sit for a few minutes and then go over the rules again with her. Once she decided she liked to play with the other dcg all of that has ended except for her not wanting the other dcg to play with anyone else or with anything but what she says. She still doesn't like the other dcks. I think your right she does rule the house.
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hwichlaz 07:16 AM 05-23-2017
It sounds like she may be an introvert and needs some space. However, that doesn't excuse rude behavior. She should also learn how to advocate for herself and get her needs met while still being polite and kind.
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