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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>DCM's Lawyer Called Me
LaLa1923 08:18 PM 05-13-2013
I have a DCM who had their nasty bully of a lawyer call me and tell me I did not know contract law. That it doesn't matter what I put in my contract, it must follow the law.

DCM did not notify me of a late arrival and I went about my day. She shows up an hour later wanting to know why I wasn't home.

Long story short she terminated care bc I failed to fulfill the contract. She said since I wasn't home I broke the contract. I require 4 weeks notice to terminate care. Her lawyer said I wasn't entitled to it bc I broke the contact. It doesn't matter what I put in my contract, I am to be available during her contracted hours. This really does not make any sense to me.

Her lawyer said it doesn't matter what time she shows up or if she communicates about her drop off time. Basically she can do whatever she wants and show up whenever she wants.



SERIOUSLY?
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missjenny 08:25 PM 05-13-2013
Honestly sounds like mom is trying to pull a fast one on you. Chance are the person who called you isn't a lawyer and just one of her friends posing as one. One of my favorite classes in collage was about contract law (mind you it was contract law for business in California) but what he is saying sounds like BS to me but I am not an expert or an actual lawyer. I'd send a final bill to her for the 4 week notice and a copy of the contract where the parts where she breached it is high lighted. Also saying if payment is not received with all late fees by 30 days you will be taking her to court.

If you want to be sure you can contact your own lawyer and see what they say.
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sharlan 08:26 PM 05-13-2013
It doesn't matter what "HE" says as much as it matters what "YOUR" contract says.
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Hunni Bee 08:26 PM 05-13-2013
Are you sure that was a lawyer? I'd make them put that mess in writing and keep collecting. It still sounds like a crock anyway.
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snbauser 08:28 PM 05-13-2013
I would not trust what her "lawyer" said. First, you have no proof they are a lawyer. Second, she breached the contract by not showing up at her contracted drop off time. Third, she signed the contract. I would continue on in your process and if you are concerned have your own attorney review your contract.
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LaLa1923 08:28 PM 05-13-2013
Yes, he's real. I received his letter in the mail also.
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Willow 08:29 PM 05-13-2013
No real lawyer would make first initial contact like that.

I'd bet it was a friend or family member trying to scare you. Continue doing what you'd planned to do in regards to collecting and if they call again ask for their name, business address and licence number so you can forward the information onto your own lawyer.

At that point they can no longer contact you directly.
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Willow 08:30 PM 05-13-2013
Originally Posted by LaLa1923:
Yes, he's real. I received his letter in the mail also.
Are you sure it wasn't a doctored letter?
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blandino 08:32 PM 05-13-2013
Does your contract say anything about arriving at their usual/contracted time ?

If you have a contracted drop off time, I think that would be your saving grace. If contacted drop off is 8:00, and the child isn't there - SHE has violated the contract - not you.
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missjenny 08:37 PM 05-13-2013
Originally Posted by Willow:
Are you sure it wasn't a doctored letter?
This.

Wouldn't be hard and really I'm guessing sh owes somewhere in the neighborhood of 1000. Why would she spend about 500 to fight it? And if you got your own lawyer it will cost her even more. Not worth it.
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MNMum 09:01 PM 05-13-2013
This sounds exactly like every lawyer I've encountered. They are nasty. I hate that the US is so into lawsuits. Sorry you are going through this. I've always found it was never worth my time or money to deal with crap like this (which is what they are banking on).
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LaLa1923 09:12 PM 05-13-2013
Originally Posted by blandino:
Does your contract say anything about arriving at their usual/contracted time ?

If you have a contracted drop off time, I think that would be your saving grace. If contacted drop off is 8:00, and the child isn't there - SHE has violated the contract - not you.
Yes and yes. Her lawyer is saying it doesn't matter what time she was contracted for. I am supposed to provide services from 8-530. She can drop off whenever she likes bc she is paying me.

THis guy is legit, he apparently makes good money for the work her company sends him so he's doing this for free.
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blandino 09:18 PM 05-13-2013
Originally Posted by LaLa1923:
Yes and yes. Her lawyer is saying it doesn't matter what time she was contracted for. I am supposed to provide services from 8-530. She can drop off whenever she likes bc she is paying me.

THis guy is legit, he apparently makes good money for the work her company sends him so he's doing this for free.
I genuinely don't beleive this line of thinking will hold up. He is thinking of you like a nanny, who works for them, not as a business who operates on it's own schedule. I would find a eloquently worded way of wording that. Your schedule is not dependent on your client. You run a business with it's own independent schedule that incorporates each child's contracted drop off time, but is not dependent on, each child's individual arrival outside of those contracted times.
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Lyss 10:00 PM 05-13-2013
Do you have anything in your contract about late arrivals?

I have that parents must contact within 1 hour of contracted time if they will be late otherwise I assume they are not coming and may make plans or leave the house. It also says if they need care but don't let me know within that hour window and I make plans or leave it will be their responsibility to find alternative care for the day.

I'm so sorry you are going through this. Contact a lawyer yourself.
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Starburst 12:17 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by missjenny:
Honestly sounds like mom is trying to pull a fast one on you. Chance are the person who called you isn't a lawyer and just one of her friends posing as one. One of my favorite classes in collage was about contract law (mind you it was contract law for business in California) but what he is saying sounds like BS to me but I am not an expert or an actual lawyer. I'd send a final bill to her for the 4 week notice and a copy of the contract where the parts where she breached it is high lighted. Also saying if payment is not received with all late fees by 30 days you will be taking her to court.

If you want to be sure you can contact your own lawyer and see what they say.
I tried to do that to a mom I used to babysit because she never paid me for the last two weeks of care and skipped town she told him she would pay it before small claims court but never made any effort to pay me back after that I just cut my losses and didn't bother again because the amount wasn't worth it even if I did take her to small claims court. I would call your licensor to double check.

In the future, just in case, mention something about: "In the event that I need to temporarily leave the property during daycare hours for any reason, please arrive no later, or in some cased no earlier, than the requested time or you will have to wait for me to return. I will try to give as much notice as possible and an estimated time period. In some cases, I may be able to bring some children with me but car spots are limited so it will be first come first serve. If you do not wish for your child to join the car ride please make other arrangements until my estimated return time."
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Play Care 03:54 AM 05-14-2013
I think it's time for you to get your own representation.

Unfortunately it seems that if they get lawyered up, you need to as well. I've read too many horror stories by providers who went in to court by themselves only to get chewed up and spit out.
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snbauser 04:55 AM 05-14-2013
Nowadays, you can usually find a lawyer to see your side no matter what. I would contact your own attorney or find one to give a free consult. You don't know what the lawyer has told her. They may have told her that there isn't much they can do but that this was their best attempt at scaring you into dropping it. Like someone else said, you don't work for her. Your contract is based on her drop off and pick up times. If she didn't show for her contracted drop off time then she violated the contract.
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LaLa1923 05:16 AM 05-14-2013
Yes I contract for specific hours. Yes, I told her lawyer this. He said it doesn't matter, contract law is contract law and I have to be available during her contracted hours no matter what time she drops off.

This is my business, not his. Why would that be ok?? I will contact my lawyer when she gets back from vacation.

This entire thing just makes even more mad every time I think about it.

It appears DCM knew exactly what she was doing and she used me. I helped her out a lot and she walked all over me. No more special from me!!
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DaisyMamma 05:19 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by Lyss:
Do you have anything in your contract about late arrivals?

I have that parents must contact within 1 hour of contracted time if they will be late otherwise I assume they are not coming and may make plans or leave the house. It also says if they need care but don't let me know within that hour window and I make plans or leave it will be their responsibility to find alternative care for the day.

I'm so sorry you are going through this. Contact a lawyer yourself.
That's what I was wondering.

Do you know any lawyers who can review your contract?
He may be BS/bullying you and just hoping you cave in order to not have to pay your own legal fees.

You'll have to decide to either let it go or call your own representation.
Good luck. I'm sorry you have to deal with this.
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LittleD 06:16 AM 05-14-2013
And I certainly wouldn't be contacting her lawyer to fence words with him anymore. Wait for your lawyer. Not to mention just because the lawyer doesn't think it's valid, it's really up to a judge, kwim? If you have a lawyer who thinks you can win, I'd go for it, just out of principle!
AND go for pain and suffering LOL!
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blandino 06:31 AM 05-14-2013
It would be the same as a client making a 10:00 appointment with him, missing it by an hour. Would he still feel that he needed to be available to the client ? NO.

I mean I understand that he wouldnt have a contract with that client. But it is still the same thing. I really feel that his line of thinking is thinking of you as an employee of DCF, and not as a independently owned business.

If you change the type of business to a Dr, a store owner, etc. the situation doesn't hold up.
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Meeko 06:46 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by blandino:
I genuinely don't beleive this line of thinking will hold up. He is thinking of you like a nanny, who works for them, not as a business who operates on it's own schedule. I would find a eloquently worded way of wording that. Your schedule is not dependent on your client. You run a business with it's own independent schedule that incorporates each child's contracted drop off time, but is not dependent on, each child's individual arrival outside of those contracted times.
This.

By his thinking, a daycare provider could NEVER go anywhere with any of her kids if a parent has not shown up or called. The provider would have to stay home just in case a parent decided to show up on a whim. No business could survive that way.

If a provider has arranged to take her kids to the zoo, has them all ready to go, other parents have taken time off to help chaperone.....but Suzie's mom doesn't show, doesn't call and the provider cannot reach her........then they all can't go to the zoo because Suzie's mom MIGHT decide to show up after lunch???????? That's absurd.

I think the same as someone else pointed out earlier. He has probably told her that she doesn't stand a chance, but that he'll make some noise anyway and maybe she'll be lucky.

Bully tactics happened to me about 6 years ago. I wasn't trying to get payment, but I had a very difficult mother who tried to get money for something SHE did.

She picked up her happy, healthy child one afternoon and put him in the car. Then took off like a bat out of he!! up the road...getting air as she flew over the speed bumps on our private road. I had talked to her about it before and our police officer friend who lived up the road had told me he was ready to ticket her if he saw her speed up the road again.

About an hour later, I get a call with her yelling and screaming that her son's tongue was very badly cut and what did I do to him??? I figured out in a second that he had badly bitten his tongue as she went over the bumps. She told me he was bleeding profusely and needed stitches and I reminded her that she picked up a clean, smiling 2 year old an hour earlier. Not a trace of blood. If he was that badly injured, she would have seen a bloody, screaming child!! She was verbally abusive and so I termed over the phone.

A couple weeks later, I get a letter from an attorney stating that the child was abused in my care...but that the mother was willing to "let it drop" for a payment of $5000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They gave me three days to cough up the cash or she would "take it further".

I called and told the lawyer to "bring it on". What kind of mother is willing to drop her child being supposedly "abused" for a cash payout? I also told him that the police officer who lived at the end of the road and watched her fly over the bumps would like to talk to her.........I never heard another word.

I would still contact your own lawyer just in case, but I feel your are being bullied and she doesn't have a real case. He probably told her he would make some noise and see what your reaction was.
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Meeko 06:47 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by blandino:
It would be the same as a client making a 10:00 appointment with him, missing it by an hour. Would he still feel that he needed to be available to the client ? NO.

I mean I understand that he wouldnt have a contract with that client. But it is still the same thing. I really feel that his line of thinking is thinking of you as an employee of DCF, and not as a independently owned business.

If you change the type of business to a Dr, a store owner, etc. the situation doesn't hold up.

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Blackcat31 06:54 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by LaLa1923:
Yes I contract for specific hours. Yes, I told her lawyer this. He said it doesn't matter, contract law is contract law and I have to be available during her contracted hours no matter what time she drops off.

This is my business, not his. Why would that be ok?? I will contact my lawyer when she gets back from vacation.

This entire thing just makes even more mad every time I think about it.

It appears DCM knew exactly what she was doing and she used me. I helped her out a lot and she walked all over me. No more special from me!!
Does your contract say anything about late drop offs or families needing to be on time?

Does your contract state you take walks, field trips of whatever you were doing that you weren't home when the DCM tried to drop off?

Does your contract say anything about late parents needing to contact you within a certain time period or they will be considered absent? or anything similar?

How late was she dropping off?
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Willow 07:02 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by blandino:
It would be the same as a client making a 10:00 appointment with him, missing it by an hour. Would he still feel that he needed to be available to the client ? NO.

I mean I understand that he wouldnt have a contract with that client. But it is still the same thing. I really feel that his line of thinking is thinking of you as an employee of DCF, and not as a independently owned business.

If you change the type of business to a Dr, a store owner, etc. the situation doesn't hold up.
The difference would be that if you missed a doctor's appointment doc couldn't still charge you or bill the insurance company regardless unlike many providers who are set up the opposite.


I do think OP needs to sort out whether dropping it or getting her own representation is the best route to take at this point.

I can sort of see where he's coming from and do think they might have a decent argument unless everything is laid out to the minute and all stipulations about how she runs contracted hours are crystal clear.
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daycarediva 07:05 AM 05-14-2013
I really have no other advice other than ((((HUGS))))
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LaLa1923 07:05 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Does your contract say anything about late drop offs or families needing to be on time?

Does your contract state you take walks, field trips of whatever you were doing that you weren't home when the DCM tried to drop off?

Does your contract say anything about late parents needing to contact you within a certain time period or they will be considered absent? or anything similar?

How late was she dropping off?
DCM was an hour late. No late drop off unless pre arranged the previous business day.

I do have in my contract that we go and do things and I do not wait on late parents, that they must contact me.
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KnoxMom 07:07 AM 05-14-2013
My first word of advice to you is DO NOT SPEAK WITH THE LAWYER. He will try to take anything you say out of context. Do not explain anything, don't go over the contract with him, don't speak a single word to him. If and when you have representation, send his information on to them and let him know he is no longer to contact you directly. DON'T TALK TO DMC either!! Now that she has taken legal action, you need to be very careful about any exchanges. Stay polite, but let her know you have been advised against communication at this time. If you don't mind, post your contract here (or at least the parts relevant to the case). I think it will become very obvious who is responsible for what. In the event your contract doesn't cover these items, your lawyer will have a better understanding of what is expected and usually ruled in your area.
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Blackcat31 07:24 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by LaLa1923:
DCM was an hour late. No late drop off unless pre arranged the previous business day.

I do have in my contract that we go and do things and I do not wait on late parents, that they must contact me.
Ok, I am not an attorney but I did think I'd be one someday....

Since you have a specific rule about late drop offs and DCM did not follow that contract SHE broke her end of the contract and has no rights to expect you to follow through on your part of it.

She cannot disregard certain rules and expect you to only follow the ones she wants you too.

Her actions came BEFORE yours, therefore SHE voided any obligation you have to be available to her. You WERE available to her at HER designated time and she chose to disregard that and show up at a later time in which your contract states is ONLY acceptable if she makes arrangements the day before.

Her lawyer is using scare tactics to freak you out and in all honestly, I would call her/his bluff. A true lawyer would never contact the party their client wants to sue and "scare" them. He would instead advise his client to persue this matter in court for everything she can...kwim?

You need to go ahead and move ahead with collection against this mom and file in small claims court. Or better yet, contact an attorney yourself and ask for their advice. The first consult is usually free of charge.

Hugs for dealing with this....I know it sucks.... I've had similar experiences with lawyers trying to push their "authority" around
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VTMom 07:34 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by KnoxMom:
My first word of advice to you is DO NOT SPEAK WITH THE LAWYER. He will try to take anything you say out of context. Do not explain anything, don't go over the contract with him, don't speak a single word to him. If and when you have representation, send his information on to them and let him know he is no longer to contact you directly. DON'T TALK TO DMC either!! Now that she has taken legal action, you need to be very careful about any exchanges. Stay polite, but let her know you have been advised against communication at this time. If you don't mind, post your contract here (or at least the parts relevant to the case). I think it will become very obvious who is responsible for what. In the event your contract doesn't cover these items, your lawyer will have a better understanding of what is expected and usually ruled in your area.
I agree with this 100%.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 07:34 AM 05-14-2013
I hope this gets resolved quickly and without much stress. That doesn't seem right. You WERE there at her contracted timed, so you didn't break your contract.
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blandino 07:35 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by Willow:
The difference would be that if you missed a doctor's appointment doc couldn't still charge you or bill the insurance company regardless unlike many providers who are set up the opposite.


I do think OP needs to sort out whether dropping it or getting her own representation is the best route to take at this point.

I can sort of see where he's coming from and do think they might have a decent argument unless everything is laid out to the minute and all stipulations about how she runs contracted hours are crystal clear.
Not trying to be argumentative, but if I missed a Dr. Appt - or a hair appt (which is a better example) I would have to pay for the appt. of I ever wanted to return. My Dr. Office has a missed appt fee also - but it isn't the whole fee, like my hair stylist is.
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LaLa1923 07:36 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Ok, I am not an attorney but I did think I'd be one someday....

Since you have a specific rule about late drop offs and DCM did not follow that contract SHE broke her end of the contract and has no rights to expect you to follow through on your part of it.

She cannot disregard certain rules and expect you to only follow the ones she wants you too.

Her actions came BEFORE yours, therefore SHE voided any obligation you have to be available to her. You WERE available to her at HER designated time and she chose to disregard that and show up at a later time in which your contract states is ONLY acceptable if she makes arrangements the day before.

Her lawyer is using scare tactics to freak you out and in all honestly, I would call her/his bluff. A true lawyer would never contact the party their client wants to sue and "scare" them. He would instead advise his client to persue this matter in court for everything she can...kwim?

You need to go ahead and move ahead with collection against this mom and file in small claims court. Or better yet, contact an attorney yourself and ask for their advice. The first consult is usually free of charge.

Hugs for dealing with this....I know it sucks.... I've had similar experiences with lawyers trying to push their "authority" around


I think the same.

I think regardless, if she wanted to terminate care that is her right to do so. BUT she must do so pursuant to the contract and that she did not do.
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TheGoodLife 07:37 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by LittleD:
And I certainly wouldn't be contacting her lawyer to fence words with him anymore. Wait for your lawyer. Not to mention just because the lawyer doesn't think it's valid, it's really up to a judge, kwim? If you have a lawyer who thinks you can win, I'd go for it, just out of principle!
AND go for pain and suffering LOL!
. Agree, this person is trying to scare/bully you for something you are rightfully owed- don't let them!
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williams2008 07:43 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by KnoxMom:
My first word of advice to you is DO NOT SPEAK WITH THE LAWYER. He will try to take anything you say out of context. Do not explain anything, don't go over the contract with him, don't speak a single word to him. If and when you have representation, send his information on to them and let him know he is no longer to contact you directly. DON'T TALK TO DMC either!! Now that she has taken legal action, you need to be very careful about any exchanges. Stay polite, but let her know you have been advised against communication at this time. If you don't mind, post your contract here (or at least the parts relevant to the case). I think it will become very obvious who is responsible for what. In the event your contract doesn't cover these items, your lawyer will have a better understanding of what is expected and usually ruled in your area.
I agree!!
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MyAngels 07:59 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by KnoxMom:
My first word of advice to you is DO NOT SPEAK WITH THE LAWYER. He will try to take anything you say out of context. Do not explain anything, don't go over the contract with him, don't speak a single word to him. If and when you have representation, send his information on to them and let him know he is no longer to contact you directly. DON'T TALK TO DMC either!! Now that she has taken legal action, you need to be very careful about any exchanges. Stay polite, but let her know you have been advised against communication at this time. If you don't mind, post your contract here (or at least the parts relevant to the case). I think it will become very obvious who is responsible for what. In the event your contract doesn't cover these items, your lawyer will have a better understanding of what is expected and usually ruled in your area.

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littlemissmuffet 08:14 AM 05-14-2013
I had this same situation last year. Mom/grandma were ALWAYS dropping off late, despite knowing my policy that drop offs after 9am (without a scheduled doc appt) are not permitted.

Grandma shows up around 10am and tries to drop off DCG. My door was locked and I had ZERO intention of answering it. I was so tired of their drama and not following the rules, and I knew this would force them to end services with me.

So, they don't show up for a couple of days and I email mom that our contract is officially terminated and referenced another policy of mine that after 2 consecutive no shows/no calls that services are termed and she was not entitled to any reimbursement (I charge monthly and this was only 3-4 days into the month).

I never hear from mom again, but grandma stops by a few days later and tries to force her way in my house - tells me their lawyer said I don't get to decide when a parent drops off (oh yeah? Maybe I shouldn't get to decide when parents pick up either ) and that I should have been here for the drop off. I laughed at her and told her to shove it and closed the door in her face after she told me she was calling the police because I wouldn't give DCGs sunhat to her (will only retunr a child's belongings to the person I have the contract with). Because you know, the cops care about a 2 year olds hat

Anyways, the lawyer contacted me and basically told me the same thing that this grandma and your loser DCM's lawyer told you. I argued back, that I had it written in my contract and handbook that drop offs after 9am were not allowed... I then emailed the mom a scanned copy of our signed contract...

I never heard from the lawyer again.
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Patches 08:20 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by littlemissmuffet:
I had this same situation last year. Mom/grandma were ALWAYS dropping off late, despite knowing my policy that drop offs after 9am (without a scheduled doc appt) are not permitted.

Grandma shows up around 10am and tries to drop off DCG. My door was locked and I had ZERO intention of answering it. I was so tired of their drama and not following the rules, and I knew this would force them to end services with me.

So, they don't show up for a couple of days and I email mom that our contract is officially terminated and referenced another policy of mine that after 2 consecutive no shows/no calls that services are termed and she was not entitled to any reimbursement (I charge monthly and this was only 3-4 days into the month).

I never hear from mom again, but grandma stops by a few days later and tries to force her way in my house - tells me their lawyer said I don't get to decide when a parent drops off (oh yeah? Maybe I shouldn't get to decide when parents pick up either ) and that I should have been here for the drop off. I laughed at her and told her to shove it and closed the door in her face after she told me she was calling the police because I wouldn't give DCGs sunhat to her (will only retunr a child's belongings to the person I have the contract with). Because you know, the cops care about a 2 year olds hat

Anyways, the lawyer contacted me and basically told me the same thing that this grandma and your loser DCM's lawyer told you. I argued back, that I had it written in my contract and handbook that drop offs after 9am were not allowed... I then emailed the mom a scanned copy of our signed contract...

I never heard from the lawyer again.
Wow! Umm no way is some granny forcing her way into my house! Wow..... Now I have a mental image of it and it's cracking me up.
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MarinaVanessa 09:13 AM 05-14-2013
I am not going to add any advice because everything that I would have said has already been covered but I wanted to say that I am sooo sorry that you have to deal with this . It really would be in your best interest to schedule a free consultation or even pay for an hour of an attorney's time to give your paperwork a quick look through.


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wdmmom 10:00 AM 05-14-2013
I would send the DCP a certified letter that states the total amount due and I would give her a day to pay it in full by.

Since she lawyered up, I would also enclose a small note in the letter stating that any further communication may be directed towards (your lawyers name) and in the event this is taken to court, you will be pursing attorney's fees and court costs.

I would make this as expensive for her as possible!

Some people will never learn!/smh
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countrymom 10:23 AM 05-14-2013
don't back down. If she does this to you, then she's going to do this to someone else. I would stick it to her and make her pay.

also, since when do lawyers contact you. don't most of them have their assistance call the people. he's trying to scare you. Stay strong!
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Willow 10:44 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by blandino:
Not trying to be argumentative, but if I missed a Dr. Appt - or a hair appt (which is a better example) I would have to pay for the appt. of I ever wanted to return. My Dr. Office has a missed appt fee also - but it isn't the whole fee, like my hair stylist is.

Yeah, not sure if we're just from different planets or something but I have never heard of such a thing lol.
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blandino 11:00 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by Willow:
Yeah, not sure if we're just from different planets or something but I have never heard of such a thing lol.
It must be a regional thing. If I cancel a Dr. Appt within 24 hours before - or if I just don't show up - I have a 25.00 missed appointment fee - if I ever want to go back to that Dr.

And if I were to be an hour late to my hair appointment - and she was busy with another customer - I would still owe her for my haircut. She had the time set aside for me, as a customer, and then I was a no show - she is out the money. Almost just like a daycare situation.

Your planet sounds nice
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Play Care 11:06 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by blandino:
It must be a regional thing. If I cancel a Dr. Appt within 24 hours before - or if I just don't show up - I have a 25.00 missed appointment fee - if I ever want to go back to that Dr.

And if I were to be an hour late to my hair appointment - and she was busy with another customer - I would still owe her for my haircut. She had the time set aside for me, as a customer, and then I was a no show - she is out the money. Almost just like a daycare situation.

Your planet sounds nice
I'm in NY and it's the same here. Businesses are fed up with no shows and they have been clamping down.
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Willow 11:06 AM 05-14-2013
Ever heard the phrase "Minnesota nice?"

Pretty sure I grew up and live in the part of the state that originated from


If I miss a doctors appointment or hair appointment the most I get is a phone call asking if everything is ok!
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CedarCreek 11:08 AM 05-14-2013
We get charged missed appointment fees in southeast Texas, too.

Boooo!
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lovemykidstoo 11:14 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by blandino:
It must be a regional thing. If I cancel a Dr. Appt within 24 hours before - or if I just don't show up - I have a 25.00 missed appointment fee - if I ever want to go back to that Dr.

And if I were to be an hour late to my hair appointment - and she was busy with another customer - I would still owe her for my haircut. She had the time set aside for me, as a customer, and then I was a no show - she is out the money. Almost just like a daycare situation.

Your planet sounds nice
I have seen signs at my doctor and dentists office with the same thing. If you cancel with less than 24 hours notice then you are still liable for the amount. Having said that, I have had times where an emergency has come up (i.e. sudden flu etc) and cancelled and they didnt' charge me. I think they put those up for repeat offenders or to just discourage.

OP Good luck, I would follow all of the advice you've received here and most definately get a consult on your contract for future reference.
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countrymom 11:14 AM 05-14-2013
they don't charge us here in ontario. Now I do know that some specialists do charge but most others dont
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Unregistered 11:19 AM 05-14-2013
I'm in Ontario. In the K-W area I've seen both doctors and hairstylists/Spa like places charge.
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LaLa1923 11:23 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by Willow:
Yeah, not sure if we're just from different planets or something but I have never heard of such a thing lol.
I was charged for missing my appointment. I think it's just starting to catch on
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AmyLeigh 11:34 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo:
I have seen signs at my doctor and dentists office with the same thing. If you cancel with less than 24 hours notice then you are still liable for the amount. Having said that, I have had times where an emergency has come up (i.e. sudden flu etc) and cancelled and they didnt' charge me. I think they put those up for repeat offenders or to just discourage.

OP Good luck, I would follow all of the advice you've received here and most definately get a consult on your contract for future reference.
Very common practice here, too.
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Patches 11:45 AM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by blandino:
It must be a regional thing. If I cancel a Dr. Appt within 24 hours before - or if I just don't show up - I have a 25.00 missed appointment fee - if I ever want to go back to that Dr.

And if I were to be an hour late to my hair appointment - and she was busy with another customer - I would still owe her for my haircut. She had the time set aside for me, as a customer, and then I was a no show - she is out the money. Almost just like a daycare situation.

Your planet sounds nice
That's so funny, I've heard of this before in other places, but none of my doctors or anything do it....Wierd


This is my 500th post! .....hijack over
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Crystal 03:53 PM 05-14-2013
After going back and re-reading the original thread, I can say that I am not at all surprised and I would be surprised if you won if this goes to court.

Good luck
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momofboys 07:17 PM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by blandino:
It must be a regional thing. If I cancel a Dr. Appt within 24 hours before - or if I just don't show up - I have a 25.00 missed appointment fee - if I ever want to go back to that Dr.

And if I were to be an hour late to my hair appointment - and she was busy with another customer - I would still owe her for my haircut. She had the time set aside for me, as a customer, and then I was a no show - she is out the money. Almost just like a daycare situation.

Your planet sounds nice
Our Dr's appt cards state the same, & so does my hair stylist basically, they are reserving the right to charge u if u fail to cancel. I have no issue with it, we need to respect their time
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LaLa1923 07:20 PM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by Crystal:
After going back and re-reading the original thread, I can say that I am not at all surprised and I would be surprised if you won if this goes to court.

Good luck
Of course you wouldn't, you've been pretty negative in my posts.
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Rockgirl 07:24 PM 05-14-2013
It sounds like you've covered your bases in your contract. I hope it works out in your favor!
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CedarCreek 09:21 PM 05-14-2013
I think you would win if you went to court.
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Meeko 10:58 PM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by blandino:
It must be a regional thing. If I cancel a Dr. Appt within 24 hours before - or if I just don't show up - I have a 25.00 missed appointment fee - if I ever want to go back to that Dr.

And if I were to be an hour late to my hair appointment - and she was busy with another customer - I would still owe her for my haircut. She had the time set aside for me, as a customer, and then I was a no show - she is out the money. Almost just like a daycare situation.

Your planet sounds nice

My doc is the same. Missing an appt = a fee
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mainemomma 11:16 PM 05-14-2013
Originally Posted by Crystal:
After going back and re-reading the original thread, I can say that I am not at all surprised and I would be surprised if you won if this goes to court.

Good luck
Ummm really? Because of WHAT reason do you think this???
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daycaremom76 05:38 AM 05-15-2013
Lala I've been to court in MD and our Contracts hold up! It's small claims court and the first thing the judge will ask is what your contract says. Bring an extra copy and label the parts of your contract that back up whats going on and you will be just fine. You don't even need a lawyer. She has to prove that you are in the wrong. According to you it's in black and white so there shouldn't be an issue at all. I shook like a leaf when I went to court, but once I got in there I was fine. Good Luck!!!
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countrymom 06:38 AM 05-15-2013
I think thats why most of us are doing contract hours. Just because I'm opened from 7 to 5 doesn't mean you can come and go as you please, I'm not a store. She signed the contract to be there at a certain time, she didn't hold up her end, you waited for an hour and she didn't even call you. So you went about your business, just like the rest of us.

lets look at this way, dcm has been contracted to come to work from 7 to 3, she decides not to come till 8 am with no call, she will be docted her one hour pay, and she could be fired or put on probation. Same thing as the above. You can't come and go as you please.
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mrsp'slilpeeps 06:44 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by Crystal:
After going back and re-reading the original thread, I can say that I am not at all surprised and I would be surprised if you won if this goes to court.

Good luck
I'm confused as to why you have to be like this? She needs support, not criticism.

I'm sorry but I find you to be incredibly rude to a lot of people on here and I don't see why you need to comment if you cant be nice.

I feel that you are a bully.
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Crystal 07:45 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by mainemomma:
Ummm really? Because of WHAT reason do you think this???
read the original thread on the topic and you will know why.
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MyAngels 07:56 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by mrsp'slilpeeps:
I'm confused as to why you have to be like this? She needs support, not criticism.

I'm sorry but I find you to be incredibly rude to a lot of people on here and I don't see why you need to comment if you cant be nice.

I feel that you are a bully.
Support isn't always about telling people what they want to hear. We are all entitled to express our opinions, whether they happen to agree with the OP (or anyone else here for that matter).
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Crystal 07:57 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by mrsp'slilpeeps:
I'm confused as to why you have to be like this? She needs support, not criticism.

I'm sorry but I find you to be incredibly rude to a lot of people on here and I don't see why you need to comment if you cant be nice.

I feel that you are a bully.
You're right, some times I do come off rude. I don't intend it that way, I just am sometimes appalled at what some providers say/do because they feel they hold some sort of "power" over parents and frankly, I have grown very tired of it, and yes, I say what I feel.

When a provider intentionally leaves, knowing that the parent is likely to show up-as it was a pattern with this particular parent- and doesn't bother to send even a text or call the parent to say "hey, ya know I have an unexpected emergency, I have to leave for a bit" and the parent shows up and care is not available....well the provider got what she (the OP) actually WANTED....to no longer have the family in care and any provider who does the same can expect the same. To go after her for term notice fees, especially after stating she would fill the space from her waitlist....therefore she is out no money.....is, well, silly.

We expect our families to respect us, to call us if they are going to be late, etc. WHY is it any different for us? I understand it can be frustarting when a parent doesn't do every. little. thing. we ask, but you know what? They are human, just like us. They get busy and forget, just like us. They PAY us, so for a provider to leave the home and not be available for care for which the parent has paid, regardless if the parent calls or not, is unprofessional and unethical, IMO. AND, when parents come on this forum, looking for information about FCC, this is the type of thing they see and they lump us all in to the same, unprofessional category.

Pay close attention to the posts on the forum. The providers you hear complaining the loudest about high turnover, problem parents, etc. are the providers who are never willing to make exceptions, compromise or, basically, work WITH parents intead of AGAINST them. I am not saying to kiss anyones _ _ _, but come on, we gotta give a little now and then.
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Crystal 07:57 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by MyAngels:
Support isn't always about telling people what they want to hear. We are all entitled to express our opinions, whether they happen to agree with the OP (or anyone else here for that matter).
Thank you.
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CedarCreek 07:58 AM 05-15-2013
I've read the original thread.

I also would have called if I were leaving, however,I still think op would win if it was taken to court.

Its not a matter of whether not calling was right or wrong. The contract is what matters.
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Crystal 08:09 AM 05-15-2013
Well, maybe I am mistaken. If I knew the EXACT verbiage in the contract, I might have a differnet opinion. In the original thread, that inquiry (which was asked several times) was never specifically answered, so who knows?

I do know, as a provider, I would NEVER just leave when children have yet to arrive....I would call first and as a Parent, I wouldn't pay for services not rendered after the provider is unavailable for care.
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Crystal 08:11 AM 05-15-2013
Also, in regards to support, as Nannyde once said, support can sometimes be a dangerous thing.

I don't automatically support someone because they are a provider. I support what is right, fair and ethical. IMO, this provider displayed NONE of that in this parent/provider interaction, or lack thereof.
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lovemykidstoo 08:14 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by MyAngels:
Support isn't always about telling people what they want to hear. We are all entitled to express our opinions, whether they happen to agree with the OP (or anyone else here for that matter).
I have to agree with this statement.
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LaLa1923 08:18 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by mrsp'slilpeeps:
I'm confused as to why you have to be like this? She needs support, not criticism.

I'm sorry but I find you to be incredibly rude to a lot of people on here and I don't see why you need to comment if you cant be nice.

I feel that you are a bully.
me too
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LaLa1923 08:20 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by Crystal:
You're right, some times I do come off rude. I don't intend it that way, I just am sometimes appalled at what some providers say/do because they feel they hold some sort of "power" over parents and frankly, I have grown very tired of it, and yes, I say what I feel.

When a provider intentionally leaves, knowing that the parent is likely to show up-as it was a pattern with this particular parent- and doesn't bother to send even a text or call the parent to say "hey, ya know I have an unexpected emergency, I have to leave for a bit" and the parent shows up and care is not available....well the provider got what she (the OP) actually WANTED....to no longer have the family in care and any provider who does the same can expect the same. To go after her for term notice fees, especially after stating she would fill the space from her waitlist....therefore she is out no money.....is, well, silly.

We expect our families to respect us, to call us if they are going to be late, etc. WHY is it any different for us? I understand it can be frustarting when a parent doesn't do every. little. thing. we ask, but you know what? They are human, just like us. They get busy and forget, just like us. They PAY us, so for a provider to leave the home and not be available for care for which the parent has paid, regardless if the parent calls or not, is unprofessional and unethical, IMO. AND, when parents come on this forum, looking for information about FCC, this is the type of thing they see and they lump us all in to the same, unprofessional category.

Pay close attention to the posts on the forum. The providers you hear complaining the loudest about high turnover, problem parents, etc. are the providers who are never willing to make exceptions, compromise or, basically, work WITH parents intead of AGAINST them. I am not saying to kiss anyones _ _ _, but come on, we gotta give a little now and then.
She was supposed to contact me, not the other way around. She always contacted me if she was running late.

This is my business and I will not be walked on.
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Blackcat31 08:24 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by Crystal:
Also, in regards to support, as Nannyde once said, support can sometimes be a dangerous thing.

I don't automatically support someone because they are a provider. I support what is right, fair and ethical. IMO, this provider displayed NONE of that in this parent/provider interaction, or lack thereof.
I agree with this.

Yes, this board can be supportive but that isn't the sole purpose.

Sometimes posters come here asking for advice and when they don't hear what they want, they get upset or mad about it and start saying people are criticizing or being unsupportive when in fact each and everyone of us here has a different perspective and a different opinion about things.

I think support is just a perk of this forum but it isn't the purposeful intention.

Just because Crystal doesn't agree or see things in the same way as the 20 posters who posted before her, doesn't mean she is a bully or rude.

The OP asked for advice on a public forum. She got an array of responses about what "might" or "could" happen. The only one that really matters though is hers. (the OP).

Depending on the circumstances, she may or may not win in court.

This forum is not judge and jury. We are a group of providers that do things in a million different ways and have a million different outlooks and opinions on things.
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LaLa1923 08:24 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by Crystal:
You're right, some times I do come off rude. I don't intend it that way, I just am sometimes appalled at what some providers say/do because they feel they hold some sort of "power" over parents and frankly, I have grown very tired of it, and yes, I say what I feel.

When a provider intentionally leaves, knowing that the parent is likely to show up-as it was a pattern with this particular parent- and doesn't bother to send even a text or call the parent to say "hey, ya know I have an unexpected emergency, I have to leave for a bit" and the parent shows up and care is not available....well the provider got what she (the OP) actually WANTED....to no longer have the family in care and any provider who does the same can expect the same. To go after her for term notice fees, especially after stating she would fill the space from her waitlist....therefore she is out no money.....is, well, silly.

We expect our families to respect us, to call us if they are going to be late, etc. WHY is it any different for us? I understand it can be frustarting when a parent doesn't do every. little. thing. we ask, but you know what? They are human, just like us. They get busy and forget, just like us. They PAY us, so for a provider to leave the home and not be available for care for which the parent has paid, regardless if the parent calls or not, is unprofessional and unethical, IMO. AND, when parents come on this forum, looking for information about FCC, this is the type of thing they see and they lump us all in to the same, unprofessional category.

Pay close attention to the posts on the forum. The providers you hear complaining the loudest about high turnover, problem parents, etc. are the providers who are never willing to make exceptions, compromise or, basically, work WITH parents intead of AGAINST them. I am not saying to kiss anyones _ _ _, but come on, we gotta give a little now and then.
You've repeatedly called me unprofessional and you are incorrect.

You may wish to be owned and be a slave to your parents but I do not.

I will not wait around for my parents if they cannot respect my time. !
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Blackcat31 08:28 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by Willow:
Ever heard the phrase "Minnesota nice?"

Pretty sure I grew up and live in the part of the state that originated from


If I miss a doctors appointment or hair appointment the most I get is a phone call asking if everything is ok!
I think it is statewide. It's like that here too.

My DD was late for a doctor apt one day for a follow up on a rash she had. She ended up missing the appt all together.

She stopped into Target later that same afternoon and saw her Dr there.

He stopped her and talked with her about the rash, looked it over right there in the store and walked over to the pharmacy with her and got her a prescription cream right then and there.

Minnesota Nice!!
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LaLa1923 08:32 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I agree with this.

Yes, this board can be supportive but that isn't the sole purpose.

Sometimes posters come here asking for advice and when they don't hear what they want, they get upset or mad about it and start saying people are criticizing or being unsupportive when in fact each and everyone of us here has a different perspective and a different opinion about things.

I think support is just a perk of this forum but it isn't the purposeful intention.

Just because Crystal doesn't agree or see things in the same way as the 20 posters who posted before her, doesn't mean she is a bully or rude.

The OP asked for advice on a public forum. She got an array of responses about what "might" or "could" happen. The only one that really matters though is hers. (the OP).

Depending on the circumstances, she may or may not win in court.

This forum is not judge and jury. We are a group of providers that do things in a million different ways and have a million different outlooks and opinions on things.

I have great respect for you in this forum but I am completely appalled that you would support her. She has obviously been a bully by the harsh incorrect assumptions she has made. She does not have to support me but she could've been more of an adult and not ignorant.

It's all on how you say it, if anyone has been unprofessional it's her.
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Blackcat31 08:33 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by LaLa1923:
You've repeatedly called me unprofessional and you are incorrect.

You may wish to be owned and be a slave to your parents but I do not.

I will not wait around for my parents if they cannot respect my time. !
I don't think Crystal called you unprofessional because you aren't a slave to your parents, I think she called you unprofessional because you KNEW this mom would be upset when she came late (as she frequently did) so instead of being professional and giving her a head's up about you having to leave, you left knowing FULL WELL that it would cause a lot of drama...which it did.

I understand why you left without talking to the DCM. She was repeatedly rude by not calling or showing up as scheduled but two wrongs don't make a right and you could simply have been the bigger person and texted her or called her and just said "Hey, I know you are always late so I thought I would call and let you know I have to leave."
I think you did what you did because you WERE upset about her habitual lateness.

A better way to have handled the lateness would have been to address it face to face and put a stop to it.

That is MY personal interpretation of where Crystal is coming from.
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Blackcat31 08:37 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by LaLa1923:
I have great respect for you in this forum but I am completely appalled that you would support her. She has obviously been a bully by the harsh incorrect assumptions she has made. She does not have to support me but she could've been more of an adult and not ignorant.

It's all on how you say it, if anyone has been unprofessional it's her.
See? That's where you are wrong. I never said I was supporting anyone.

I was merely trying to help you understand where she was coming from and what her perspective is in this.

I respect Crystal and think she is a very professional provider who is really good at what she does. That doesn't mean I blindly follow and agree with her. We have had our differences to but we handle them without being personal about it.

I don't think she shoud be called a bully just because she is straight forward and blunt when sharing her opinion.

Most posters here are looking for opinions and perspectives (both positive and negative) not just happy faces and hugs all the time...kwim?
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Crystal 08:46 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by LaLa1923:
She was supposed to contact me, not the other way around. She always contacted me if she was running late.

This is my business and I will not be walked on.
hmmmm....I thought she frequently ran late and did NOT call you to let you know.

I would never suggest being walked on by parents.
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Treefrogtiff 08:49 AM 05-15-2013
It's sad that there are people out there who give so little regard to the person who has cared for there child. I have experienced this myself. What I started doing was collecting 2weeks in advance plus the week they start. This is a lot of money but good appreciative parents are willing to do. I also changed my notice policy to 2 weeks notice. I would cut my losses. This woman will get paybacks in other ways. She obviously has bigger issues.
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Crystal 08:51 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by LaLa1923:
You've repeatedly called me unprofessional and you are incorrect.

You may wish to be owned and be a slave to your parents but I do not.

I will not wait around for my parents if they cannot respect my time. !
I have not repeatedly called you unprofessional. I have stated that I feel that it is unprofessional to not contact a parent to let them know you are temporarily unavailable for care. Sure, it is in reference to YOUR post, but I would say it to anyone, so please stop taking it so personally.

And your implying that I wish to be "owned and a slave to my parents" LOL, that couldn't be any further from the truth. I have fabulous relationships with my families who stay with me VERY long term and we work TOGETHER with MUTUAL respect for each other. I do not have late parents-at drop off or pick up/late payments/disrespect EVER. I attribute that partially to the fact that I am flexible and considerate of them, just as I expect them to be of me.
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LaLa1923 08:54 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by Crystal:
hmmmm....I thought she frequently ran late and did NOT call you to let you know.

I would never suggest being walked on by parents.

Nope, she wouldn't contact me if they weren't coming. Thus, I assumed they were not coming.
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Crystal 08:54 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
See? That's where you are wrong. I never said I was supporting anyone.

I was merely trying to help you understand where she was coming from and what her perspective is in this.

I respect Crystal and think she is a very professional provider who is really good at what she does. That doesn't mean I blindly follow and agree with her. We have had our differences to but we handle them without being personal about it.

I don't think she shoud be called a bully just because she is straight forward and blunt when sharing her opinion.

Most posters here are looking for opinions and perspectives (both positive and negative) not just happy faces and hugs all the time...kwim?
Thanks for attempting to clarify for me, I appreciate it.
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LaLa1923 08:56 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by Crystal:
I have not repeatedly called you unprofessional. I have stated that I feel that it is unprofessional to not contact a parent to let them know you are temporarily unavailable for care. Sure, it is in reference to YOUR post, but I would say it to anyone, so please stop taking it so personally.

And your implying that I wish to be "owned and a slave to my parents" LOL, that couldn't be any further from the truth. I have fabulous relationships with my families who stay with me VERY long term and we work TOGETHER with MUTUAL respect for each other. I do not have late parents-at drop off or pick up/late payments/disrespect EVER. I attribute that partially to the fact that I am flexible and considerate of them, just as I expect them to be of me.
She was the only problem parent I had. The rest of my families are great!
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Crystal 08:58 AM 05-15-2013
One last thing and then I will rest.....

If you do not want everyone's thoughts/feedback/opinions, then DON'T ASK for them.

And, if you don't like mine thoughts/feedback/opinions specifically, you can go to your user control panel and put me on "ignore" then you will not have to see/read my thoughts/feedback/opinions.
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countrymom 09:08 AM 05-15-2013
since when has it become my job to start looking after the parent. do you think their employees or bosses do, nope. I'm sorry, but this mother is a grown women, she needs to put her big girl panties on and act like an adult. She contracted a time, she didn't show up and the provider went about her business.

it boils down to responsibility, and a judge is going to ask the mom why she didn't call if she knew she was going to be late.

also, in a previous thread many said that providers should go about their business if a parent doesn't come, well this provider did and now she is getting flak for it, gee some of you need to make up your minds, its confusing. It was another thread about provider leaving after the parent didn't show up.

and before I did contract hours I use to run "come whenever you want because I'm open" mantality. Well after a while and lots of missed library time, walks around the block and school activities, you learn to give a damn about your business and not let parents dictate to you what they want or come whenver they want. Its seems like its becoming a trend with parents coming and going as they please, its so disrespectful I just don't even know what else to call it.

dcm got busted and now crying like a 2 yr old because she didn't get her way. Well boo hoo to her, who knows how many other people she has done this too. the only difference is that someone is willing to do something about it.
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sharlan 09:12 AM 05-15-2013
All the drama would have been avoided with a 15 sec text. Honest communication prevents a lot of problems. Passive/Agressive situations always cause trouble.

It doesn't matter who was right, who was wrong. As my mom always says, two wrongs don't make a right.
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Unregistered 09:26 AM 05-15-2013
Maybe I'm wrong, but I thought in the original post DaycareMom had to drop off before 9am or go without care for the day. Then she arrived shortly before 9am to find you were not there. In that case, if I was leaving the house before the cut off time, I would have made a call out to the parent for sure. Especially with a history of lack of communication.
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mrsp'slilpeeps 09:27 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by countrymom:
since when has it become my job to start looking after the parent. do you think their employees or bosses do, nope. I'm sorry, but this mother is a grown women, she needs to put her big girl panties on and act like an adult. She contracted a time, she didn't show up and the provider went about her business.

it boils down to responsibility, and a judge is going to ask the mom why she didn't call if she knew she was going to be late.

also, in a previous thread many said that providers should go about their business if a parent doesn't come, well this provider did and now she is getting flak for it, gee some of you need to make up your minds, its confusing. It was another thread about provider leaving after the parent didn't show up.

and before I did contract hours I use to run "come whenever you want because I'm open" mantality. Well after a while and lots of missed library time, walks around the block and school activities, you learn to give a damn about your business and not let parents dictate to you what they want or come whenver they want. Its seems like its becoming a trend with parents coming and going as they please, its so disrespectful I just don't even know what else to call it.

dcm got busted and now crying like a 2 yr old because she didn't get her way. Well boo hoo to her, who knows how many other people she has done this too. the only difference is that someone is willing to do something about it.
Exactly.
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lolaland 09:28 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by Crystal:
hmmmm....I thought she frequently ran late and did NOT call you to let you know.

I would never suggest being walked on by parents.
Sorry if I sound unfair...:

We all know this job keeps everyone very busy, it can also be emotional sometimes... so of course, if someone comes here and posts a problem, they can not give a very detailed explanation of what's going on in their first post of the thread!

We all in this forum already realized that only after many back and forward posts of questions posted and answers given we start then to get a clearer idea of how things developed to the point of the conflict explained on the OP initial post. Therefor, for those that have a blunt not so positive comment to make, it would be more appropriate to ask some questions first and than give your not supportive opinion only when all your questions were answered.

I've notice that some members tend to jump immediately to the provider's defence... and a few tend to jump to the parent's defence with “no questions asked”...

But there is always 3 sides to every story: The provider's... the parent... and the truth. Therefor I think there should be some moderation when providing a blunt negative feedback.
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momofboys 09:35 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by CedarCreek:
I've read the original thread.

I also would have called if I were leaving, however,I still think op would win if it was taken to court.

Its not a matter of whether not calling was right or wrong. The contract is what matters.

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sharlan 09:38 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by lolaland:
Sorry if I sound unfair...:

We all know this job keeps everyone very busy, it can also be emotional sometimes... so of course, if someone comes here and posts a problem, they can not give a very detailed explanation of what's going on in their first post of the thread!

We all in this forum already realized that only after many back and forward posts of questions posted and answers given we start then to get a clearer idea of how things developed to the point of the conflict explained on the OP initial post. Therefor, for those that have a blunt not so positive comment to make, it would be more appropriate to ask some questions first and than give your not supportive opinion only when all your questions were answered.

I've notice that some members tend to jump immediately to the provider's defence... and a few tend to jump to the parent's defence with “no questions asked”...

But there is always 3 sides to every story: The provider's... the parent... and the truth. Therefor I think there should be some moderation when providing a blunt negative feedback.
This is the truth.
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Lucy 09:49 AM 05-15-2013
It would tick me off to no end if a parent did this to me. Especially if it happened repeatedly. It is rude and disrespectful. It also says to me that they don't value me, my time, or my feelings. It would definitely have me steaming and thinking, "I should just leave and go about my day. That'll show her!!!"

That being said, I would take the high road, not stoop to her passive-aggressive level, and send a very short text : "Gotta run. Assume you're not coming." It would NOT be as a courtesy to the woman; she doesn't deserve courtesy at this point. It would be to maintain my integrity, and to CYA (cover your a*s*s!!) so that when she gets miffed, you can point out that you DID let her know you had to leave.

Just my opinion. I don't like to fight inconsideration with more of the same. Don't get me wrong.... it wouldn't be out of concern that I would text her. It wouldn't be because I wanted to be nice and do her a favor! It would just be a case of being the bigger person. I kinda think that would teach her a lesson even moreso than just leaving would. It says "not letting you walk all over me", without saying "I can be just as thoughtless as you".

Totally not taking anyone's "side" here. There shouldn't even BE "sides" IMO. Just opinions.
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Blackcat31 09:55 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by Lucy:
It would tick me off to no end if a parent did this to me. Especially if it happened repeatedly. It is rude and disrespectful. It also says to me that they don't value me, my time, or my feelings. It would definitely have me steaming and thinking, "I should just leave and go about my day. That'll show her!!!"

That being said, I would take the high road, not stoop to her passive-aggressive level, and send a very short text : "Gotta run. Assume you're not coming." It wouldn't be as a courtesy to the woman; she doesn't deserve courtesy at this point. It would be to maintain my integrity, and to CYA (cover your a*s*s!!) so that when she gets miffed, you can point out that you DID let her know you had to leave.

Just my opinion. I don't like to fight inconsideration with more of the same. Don't get me wrong.... it wouldn't be out of concern that I would text her. It wouldn't be because I wanted to be nice and do her a favor! It would just be a case of being the bigger person. I kinda think that would teach her a lesson even moreso than just leaving would. It says "not letting you walk all over me", without saying "I can be just as thoughtless as you".

Totally not taking anyone's "side" here. There shouldn't even BE "sides" IMO. Just opinions.

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Unregistered 10:02 AM 05-15-2013
If this "lawyer" contacts you again, tell him that he can represent client in small claims court. The judge will decide that you contract is in order.

Hang in there!
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LaLa1923 10:15 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Maybe I'm wrong, but I thought in the original post DaycareMom had to drop off before 9am or go without care for the day. Then she arrived shortly before 9am to find you were not there. In that case, if I was leaving the house before the cut off time, I would have made a call out to the parent for sure. Especially with a history of lack of communication.
You can come late but you must let me know it advance before your scheduled drop off time. Most parents would know based on how the morning was going if they were going to be late or not. All I ask of my parents is to let me know or I will assume they are going to be absent for the day. My 9am drop off time is in regards to those who do let me know they are dropping of late, it must be before 9am. In this case, I never heard from mom so I marked her child as absent.
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MyAngels 10:16 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by Lucy:
It would tick me off to no end if a parent did this to me. Especially if it happened repeatedly. It is rude and disrespectful. It also says to me that they don't value me, my time, or my feelings. It would definitely have me steaming and thinking, "I should just leave and go about my day. That'll show her!!!"

That being said, I would take the high road, not stoop to her passive-aggressive level, and send a very short text : "Gotta run. Assume you're not coming." It wouldn't be as a courtesy to the woman; she doesn't deserve courtesy at this point. It would be to maintain my integrity, and to CYA (cover your a*s*s!!) so that when she gets miffed, you can point out that you DID let her know you had to leave.

Just my opinion. I don't like to fight inconsideration with more of the same. Don't get me wrong.... it wouldn't be out of concern that I would text her. It wouldn't be because I wanted to be nice and do her a favor! It would just be a case of being the bigger person. I kinda think that would teach her a lesson even moreso than just leaving would. It says "not letting you walk all over me", without saying "I can be just as thoughtless as you".

Totally not taking anyone's "side" here. There shouldn't even BE "sides" IMO. Just opinions.

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Sugar Magnolia 10:49 AM 05-15-2013
Originally Posted by mrsp'slilpeeps:
I'm confused as to why you have to be like this? She needs support, not criticism.

I'm sorry but I find you to be incredibly rude to a lot of people on here and I don't see why you need to comment if you cant be nice.

I feel that you are a bully.
I see nothing mean in her post. Crystal doesn't think the OP will win in court, that's it. What is "rude" or bully-like about disagreeing ???
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MarinaVanessa 11:05 AM 05-15-2013
The only thing I will say is that this will serve as a learning experience. It doesn't matter what we on this forum think or say but how the law in any state works, what the contract says and what the judge thinks and rules. Can you post what your contract specifically says as pertaining to this topic? For example my contract says this:

"It is the client’s responsibility to abide by all of the policies stipulated in the [Daycare Name] Policy Handbook, Parent’s Guide in conjunction to this contract."

My handbook reads:

"Unless prior arrangements have been made with the child care provider’s approval all clients are required to adhere to their contracted schedules."

"If the client is running late or wishes to drop-off later than their contracted drop-off time the client must notify the childcare provider no later than 15 minutes before their scheduled drop-off time. If the client decides to pick up their child earlier than their contracted pick-up time the client must notify the childcare provider no later than their scheduled drop-off time. The childcare provider routinely takes the daycare children on walks and outings with little or no notice based around each client’s scheduled drop-off and pick-up times. Clients arriving late risk arriving at a time when the childcare provider is away from the daycare home and it will then be the responsibility of the client to either wait for the childcare provider’s return or to go to the childcare provider’s location to drop-off and pick-up their child."

For me it's clear and in my policies and in my state this will hold up in court (I had a similar issue with a previous client once, she said she would go to her lawyer and I never heard from her again).

I personally would contact a lawyer for a free consultation or pay for an hour of a lawyer's time if I could not find one that will do a free consult. I think that it will be a good idea to get a professional to look over everything to determine whether going to small claims is a good idea or not.

In a different direction now, I think that it's important to remember that people have different temperaments and personalities and when you get so many of those differences together in one place you are bound to find that someone rubs you the wrong way. This is a public forum where we are all allowed our own opinions and if someone disagrees with us it does not mean that they are being negative or attacking anyone, it just means they have a difference in opinion. It's not personal. Supporting someone simply to support them is not doing them any favors. If you agree with that person, great! Support them. If you don't, then don't. In this thread I did not see anything from Crystal which was "negative" in the sense that she was being deliberately demeaning or insulting. She simply stated that

"After going back and re-reading the original thread, I can say that I am not at all surprised and I would be surprised if you won if this goes to court. Good luck "

I do not see anything there in that response that was in any way rude. And to be quite frank I am not surprised either. The way I see it is this DCP is a drama queen, it really isn't surprising that she would make a big deal about it. She was allowed special, then suddenly not so she threw a fit. It was to be expected. I would have done things different in this situation starting from when this parent first started to break my policies. If you allow special then special becomes normal to a client regardless of whether or not it is against your policies.

I personally am tired of going into a thread and seeing that a perfectly good topic is derailed and hijacked (not just talking about thus thread but generally speaking) and I personally feel that sometimes people are overly sensitive and take comments personal and then take those feelings into other threads. I have been a member of this forum for years and I have taken my share of "beatings", "rude awakenings", "down-talks" and "criticism" but I chose to take it as creative criticism, not a personal attack. From those criticisms I made changes in the way that I did things and I improved my business because to me it's obvious that if I am having a problem then I need to change the way I do things therefore i welcome the feedback. I don't always agree with everyone here but I think everyone has an unbelievable amount of insight and knowledge to share and I have seen members "go at it" with each other and yes sometimes people come off strong but it's because we are passionate about what we do.
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Unregistered 11:09 AM 05-15-2013
Looks like Tom Copeland answered your question in the post you had to him. Seems to me you have nothing to worry about now! Yes, You would have WON not the parent. We all knew that, well some of us, but its nice having a childcare lawyer confirm it.

Enjoy your day with out the worry now.
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Tags:lawyer, legal issues
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