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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Ridiculous Questions/Expectations...
laceylmm 12:14 PM 03-12-2013
you've been asked during an interview? LOL, just curious. Another post brought the question to mind.
MyAngels 12:20 PM 03-12-2013
We rock our 4 year old (giant kid, too) to sleep and hold him while he sleeps, and would expect you to do the same.

Really.
AfterSchoolMom 12:24 PM 03-12-2013
I once had a couple tell me to lock their special needs children in my son's bedroom in the afternoons after school.

Also, not child care related, but I do petsitting as well over the summer...and I once had a dog owner tell me that she sits on the floor and spoon feeds her dog at mealtimes, and wanted me to do the same.
laceylmm 12:26 PM 03-12-2013
WOW spoon feed her dog!! And the locking in a bedroom is bad too. I'm bad at hiding my emotions, I can only imagine the look of shock on my face if someone said that!!
Blackcat31 12:28 PM 03-12-2013
This wasn't during an interview but I once had a parent ask me if she could pay me "a little extra" if I would reinstate her school age DS's privileges to go outside without my direct supervision......he had lost them the day before for throwing rocks at passing cars.

Um, no.
blandino 12:38 PM 03-12-2013
The woman who threatened to take us to small claims court, after she wanted her non-refundable deposit back because we refused to get extra vaccinations that she demanded that we have. BTW All our staff are vaccinated, these were just superfluous vaccines (flu, whooping cough, chicken pox - etc).

A phone call from the mom whose child was so highly allergic to milk that if he mouthed a toy that had been touched by the saliva of a child who had recently had a bottle - he would go into anaphylactic shock. So could we wipe out each child's mouth after each bottle and wait 15 min before they play with toys.

The mom who wanted her child brought to the potty, undressed, and sat on the potty every 15 min. A process that would easily take 10 minutes.
MNMum 12:40 PM 03-12-2013
This was the most uncomfortable question - "So how do you feel about little Johnny having 2 moms?" This was at the end of the interview, after this other woman had been sitting through the interview not really contributing. Hello? How about introducing yourself that way? I have no problem with it, my MIL has a partner, but the way they went about bringing this up was totally weird.
nanglgrl 12:42 PM 03-12-2013
I was once asked to spoon feed a perfectly able 4 year old. Mom also asked if she could stop by throughout the day and "hang out". NEXT!
Oneluckymom 12:46 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by MNMum:
This was the most uncomfortable question - "So how do you feel about little Johnny having 2 moms?" This was at the end of the interview, after this other woman had been sitting through the interview not really contributing. Hello? How about introducing yourself that way? I have no problem with it, my MIL has a partner, but the way they went about bringing this up was totally weird.
Why did they wait until the end of the interview?? Why not just say , hi I'm so and so and this is my PARTNER. No big deal.
mrsnj 12:50 PM 03-12-2013
*I was allowed to 'spank' a child when they were bad.
*Was my rate of $125 per week or PER MONTH? Ok that one busted me up! Yeah I will feed your child, watch them all day and do activities with them and learning things and supply it all for less than $7 a week!
*Can I make their child breakfast...as in scrambled eggs, toast, etc all while accepting other children and putting school kids on a bus.
*Would I take a children on a trial run for free for a week....or two

My fav interview was when the person wanted to know what church I attended, my hobbies were and what I did on the weekends during my free time. My husband told me I should respond with "Well, I don't believe in God, I like to do drugs outside of the local strip joint and on my free days I stand on a street corner selling, well, anything anyone wanted". I didn't think that would go over well so I just stopped emailing back and told her I was full! What I do outside of my work time isn't their business.
mrsnj 12:52 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by blandino:
The woman who threatened to take us to small claims court, after she wanted her non-refundable deposit back because we refused to get extra vaccinations that she demanded that we have. BTW All our staff are vaccinated, these were just superfluous vaccines (flu, whooping cough, chicken pox - etc).

A phone call from the mom whose child was so highly allergic to milk that if he mouthed a toy that had been touched by the saliva of a child who had recently had a bottle - he would go into anaphylactic shock. So could we wipe out each child's mouth after each bottle and wait 15 min before they play with toys.

The mom who wanted her child brought to the potty, undressed, and sat on the potty every 15 min. A process that would easily take 10 minutes.
OMGoosh! I think you win!
ABCDaycareMN 12:55 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by mrsnj:
*I was allowed to 'spank' a child when they were bad.
*Was my rate of $125 per week or PER MONTH? Ok that one busted me up! Yeah I will feed your child, watch them all day and do activities with them and learning things and supply it all for less than $7 a week!
*Can I make their child breakfast...as in scrambled eggs, toast, etc all while accepting other children and putting school kids on a bus.
*Would I take a children on a trial run for free for a week....or two

My fav interview was when the person wanted to know what church I attended, my hobbies were and what I did on the weekends during my free time. My husband told me I should respond with "Well, I don't believe in God, I like to do drugs outside of the local strip joint and on my free days I stand on a street corner selling, well, anything anyone wanted". I didn't think that would go over well so I just stopped emailing back and told her I was full! What I do outside of my work time isn't their business.
I was also told to spank a child when they were bad. I couldn't believe it. But looking back... Those were some naughty kids. Lol
Country Kids 01:12 PM 03-12-2013
I have had ALOT of parents actually offer to write the state a letter so that I would have permission to spank and I mean alot.
Kim 01:14 PM 03-12-2013
I had a family that interviewed and expected me to also be available to "babysit" on the weekends like I was a 16 year old working for gas money so I could go to the mall instead of a 30something wife and mother of two with a life of my own.
SilverSabre25 01:23 PM 03-12-2013
I've been given permission to swat a child on the butt (which doesn't seem all that weird, just not in the scope of what I would EVER do).

I think one of my interview kickers was the one who put me on the spot about CPR protocals for an infant. I totally flubbed the question...but was really offended by being put on the spot. That mom also nursed her son (yay!) during the interview...using the "pull down the shirt from the top and leave the whole boob hanging out" method. Um, okay...nursing is great, but you *can* do it discretely...

Oh, and "So, the children are in the kitchen with you while you make lunch, right?" Um...nope, I just got done telling you that while I make lunch they play in the playroom *right beside the kitchen*. I can see most of the room from most of the kitchen. They are *right there*. And yes I do gate them out of the kitchen while I cook...it's safer that way. And the law in my state is "visual OR auditory range" so I'm perfectly fine doing that.


Those are probably the craziest, though I may have blocked some doozies out of my memory.
EntropyControlSpecialist 01:29 PM 03-12-2013
I am a Christian woman and my business is Christian operated (it even has CHRISTIAN in the name!).

I had a woman interview here who asked, "Do you cram Christianity down their throats?" verbatim. I was so shocked that all I could do was blink for a couple of seconds. I eventually answered that I am a Christian who teaches the children from a Christian viewpoint, we do read the Bible daily, we memorize Bible verses, we memorize the 10 Commandments, we do sing Christian songs, we do pray at every meal, etc. She didn't like that.
Evansmom 01:30 PM 03-12-2013
I had some one call yesterday and tell me their current babysitter would watch all three of their children for $30 PER DAY for ALL THREE!!!! and wasn't that GREAT???!!!! And wouldn't I accommodate the same price?

HUH?? Uh. No.
Starburst 01:35 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by ABCDaycareMN:
I was also told to spank a child when they were bad. I couldn't believe it. But looking back... Those were some naughty kids. Lol
Heck, at my school's CD center the director (one of my teachers and a former FCC provider) said she terminated a parent on the spot when she saw them spank their child at the center (I think it was out of the classroom but was still in the center). She teacher that in class says that according to the law, parents have the right to spank their kids in their own homes but not leave marks. But the mom did it on daycare grounds where there was other daycare kids present and at daycare (Title 22) children have a right to not be physically punished and other kids in the daycare have a right not to witness or be exposed to another child being physically punished. The director also made a report when she saw a mark on a girl's lower back that the mom apperntly made spanking her before daycare (the girl was wearing thin PJs and I guess she buises easily) but the direct still had to report it because it was a mark left as a result of hitting.

I was think about adding a clause like that in my contract that spanking is not allowed on daycare grounds (or my property including the house, the yard, and the drive way) and being caught can lead to termination. In CA it is technically illegal to spank a child under the age of 3; if your child is over three and you do it at home and do not leave a mark even if the child says they got a spanking I technically have no right to tell you how to punish your child (but if they have marks or are injured that is another story) BUT when you are on MY property and I or another daycare child/family witnesses it and licensing doesn't allow physical punishment of children on daycare property- Than I have the right to say that is not allowed at my house and I can possibly report it. I personally don't believe in spanking and don't want it on my daycare/home property because I don't want the other kids who may or may not be spanked to be exposed to it. Also that is a form of humiliation for the child if other parents/kids see it- which is also considered unethical punishment in daycare.

*******************************************************************
Sorry for Hijacking the thread that just really seems disterbing that parents are willing to let someone they just met spank their child. I haven't started my daycare yet so I don't have any weird requests. But I was watching this show called "Parental Descretion" once (its like a late night mommy talk show) and they did this candid camera bit where a fake expecting mom was doing interveiws for a nanny and she asked weird questions like "I plan on working alot and don't want my baby to forget me. I plan on getting a mask made of my face, will you be willing to wear this mask when your with the baby?" (they all must have been desperate for a job because they all said 'yes' ) she also told them she was a 'Tiger Mom' and wanted the potential nannies to pretty much yell at the baby to calm them down when they are too fussy (and she had them show her how they would do it using a doll).
bunnyslippers 01:35 PM 03-12-2013
I was once told that little Susie was potty trained, completely independent in the bathroom. The only neccessary action on the provider's part was:

1. Pulling down her pants
2. Lifting her and putting her on the toilet
3. Singing her songs the entire time she sits there
4. Holding a tissue over her nose because SHE DOESN'T LIKE THE SMELL OF HER OWN PEE!
5. Wiping her while still holding the tissue over her nose
6. Pulling up her pants
7. Flushing AFTER she leaves the bathroom.


Ummmm, huh?!??! Next, please.
blandino 01:38 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by bunnyslippers:
I was once told that little Susie was potty trained, completely independent in the bathroom. The only neccessary action on the provider's part was:

1. Pulling down her pants
2. Lifting her and putting her on the toilet
3. Singing her songs the entire time she sits there
4. Holding a tissue over her nose because SHE DOESN'T LIKE THE SMELL OF HER OWN PEE!
5. Wiping her while still holding the tissue over her nose
6. Pulling up her pants
7. Flushing AFTER she leaves the bathroom.


Ummmm, huh?!??! Next, please.
Ha ! I am pretty sure I have had this kid.
Starburst 01:58 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by bunnyslippers:
I was once told that little Susie was potty trained, completely independent in the bathroom. The only neccessary action on the provider's part was:

1. Pulling down her pants
2. Lifting her and putting her on the toilet
3. Singing her songs the entire time she sits there
4. Holding a tissue over her nose because SHE DOESN'T LIKE THE SMELL OF HER OWN PEE!
5. Wiping her while still holding the tissue over her nose
6. Pulling up her pants
7. Flushing AFTER she leaves the bathroom.
That seems like more work than if she was still in diapers (only 4 steps (or less)- 5 max if there is a rash). I never heard of holding a tissue to someone because they cannot stand their own pee smell, what is up with that? Is she diabetic (that can cause a funky pee smell from what I hear- and that is understandable)? Does the mom feed her asparagus every day?

But yea I would NOT call that potty trained until she can at least undress herself with very little help (help wiping can be understandable due to little arms).
mrsp'slilpeeps 02:30 PM 03-12-2013
Can you help my 7 yr old wipe his bum???

Um nope!!! And they still ask me every once in a while. Can you make sure jonny has a clean bum when he is done?

Still nope!!!
bunnyslippers 02:33 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by Starburst:
That seems like more work than if she was still in diapers (only 4 steps (or less)- 5 max if there is a rash). I never heard of holding a tissue to someone because they cannot stand their own pee smell, what is up with that? Is she diabetic (that can cause a funky pee smell from what I hear- and that is understandable)? Does the mom feed her asparagus every day?

But yea I would NOT call that potty trained until she can at least undress herself with very little help (help wiping can be understandable due to little arms).
Nope, just a case of a little princess! I didn't take the child
CedarCreek 02:48 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by mrsp'slilpeeps:
Can you help my 7 yr old wipe his bum???

Um nope!!! And they still ask me every once in a while. Can you make sure jonny has a clean bum when he is done?

Still nope!!!
NO! That's way too old imo to even be in the bathroom with then while they are going. Ugh.
mrsp'slilpeeps 03:01 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by CedarCreek:
NO! That's way too old imo to even be in the bathroom with then while they are going. Ugh.
Thats what I tell his parents. I dont even go in the bathroom when my own son is in there and he is 7 too!
Starburst 03:16 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by mrsp'slilpeeps:
Can you help my 7 yr old wipe his bum???

Um nope!!! And they still ask me every once in a while. Can you make sure jonny has a clean bum when he is done?

Still nope!!!
If the child was special needs (mentally delayed or missing an arm) then I would understand but it seems like this is a child that is perfectly capable of doing it himself. I think at that age he would thank you for allowing him some privacy and would be embarrassed if the other kids found out his mommy still wipes his bu++.
MarinaVanessa 03:58 PM 03-12-2013
  1. Wanted me to not use the word NO, and to keep the other kids from saying NO (wanted me to use uh-uh-uh)... I told her NO .
  2. Asked if it was ok with me to feed their son homemade organic food ... sure no problem ... oh wait, she wanted ME to MAKE homemade organic food for her kid. NO.
  3. Wanted me to hold her child when she slept. NO.
  4. Asked if I would take their child at 4:30 am (I opened at 6 am). NO.
  5. Asked that I not nap a 9 month old. NO.
  6. Vehemently argued with me about how she was sure that the USDA program REQUIRED me to supply breast milk.
  7. Asked that I not breastfeed my infant in front of her 4 month old because it would "make him jealous" .
  8. Asked me what I did with the DCK's when I had to go to the bathroom, I answered with "What do YOU do with your kids when you have to go to the bathroom?" ... she moved on to the next question.

Meeko 04:32 PM 03-12-2013
A first time mother of a baby asked me several times during interview if I was SURE I knew how to measure formula........I had already told her I had been doing daycare longer than she had been alive and have 4 kids of my own......

When she wanted me to to prove I knew how by making a bottle right in front of her, I showed her the door.
laceylmm 04:35 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
  1. Wanted me to not use the word NO, and to keep the other kids from saying NO (wanted me to use uh-uh-uh)... I told her NO .
  2. Asked if it was ok with me to feed their son homemade organic food ... sure no problem ... oh wait, she wanted ME to MAKE homemade organic food for her kid. NO.
  3. Wanted me to hold her child when she slept. NO.
  4. Asked if I would take their child at 4:30 am (I opened at 6 am). NO.
  5. Asked that I not nap a 9 month old. NO.
  6. Vehemently argued with me about how she was sure that the USDA program REQUIRED me to supply breast milk.
  7. Asked that I not breastfeed my infant in front of her 4 month old because it would "make him jealous" .
  8. Asked me what I did with the DCK's when I had to go to the bathroom, I answered with "What do YOU do with your kids when you have to go to the bathroom?" ... she moved on to the next question.
All great, but I especially love the don't make my 4 month old jealous one!
crazydaycarelady 04:49 PM 03-12-2013
Same crazy dcmom:
~ asked that I only have the baby nap in his car seat.
~ carry sleeping baby in his car seat from room to room as I go from room to room (was told he'll sleep if he is tired)
~ was directed to only feed the baby at 10:30 and 2:30, no more than 10 minutes early or late and to just keep the bottle in his mouth until he ate 7 oz.

I was young and dumb and inexperienced and actually took the child. No surprise that it didn't last long!
blandino 05:05 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
  1. Wanted me to not use the word NO, and to keep the other kids from saying NO (wanted me to use uh-uh-uh)... I told her NO .
  2. Asked if it was ok with me to feed their son homemade organic food ... sure no problem ... oh wait, she wanted ME to MAKE homemade organic food for her kid. NO.
  3. Wanted me to hold her child when she slept. NO.
  4. Asked if I would take their child at 4:30 am (I opened at 6 am). NO.
  5. Asked that I not nap a 9 month old. NO.
  6. Vehemently argued with me about how she was sure that the USDA program REQUIRED me to supply breast milk.
  7. Asked that I not breastfeed my infant in front of her 4 month old because it would "make him jealous" .
  8. Asked me what I did with the DCK's when I had to go to the bathroom, I answered with "What do YOU do with your kids when you have to go to the bathroom?" ... she moved on to the next question.

These had me laughing. How on earth are you supposed to provide breast milk ?
MarinaVanessa 05:38 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by blandino:
These had me laughing. How on earth are you supposed to provide breast milk ?
THAT was my question . But she whole heartedly thought that I was required to provide it. I tried explaining to her that she needed to call them back and get clarification because I was allowed to serve it but that the mom needed to supply it, not me. She never called back.
apick 06:33 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
  1. Wanted me to not use the word NO, and to keep the other kids from saying NO (wanted me to use uh-uh-uh)... I told her NO .
  2. Asked if it was ok with me to feed their son homemade organic food ... sure no problem ... oh wait, she wanted ME to MAKE homemade organic food for her kid. NO.
  3. Wanted me to hold her child when she slept. NO.
  4. Asked if I would take their child at 4:30 am (I opened at 6 am). NO.
  5. Asked that I not nap a 9 month old. NO.
  6. Vehemently argued with me about how she was sure that the USDA program REQUIRED me to supply breast milk.
  7. Asked that I not breastfeed my infant in front of her 4 month old because it would "make him jealous" .
  8. Asked me what I did with the DCK's when I had to go to the bathroom, I answered with "What do YOU do with your kids when you have to go to the bathroom?" ... she moved on to the next question.
OMG this had me laughing so hard!!!
apick 07:40 PM 03-12-2013
I've been asked a number of odd questions and they were all by the same mom during the same interview.

1. How many sq ft was my house
2. What was my drivers license #
3. What my and my husbands background registry #'s were

She also had to see my CPR card for herself to make sure it was current. I wanted to be like lady this is what the state does for you and why I'm licensed! She also wrote down the license plate #'s of both are cars when she left. I wasn't sorry when I didn't hear back from her!
Starburst 10:17 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by blandino:
These had me laughing. How on earth are you supposed to provide breast milk ?
That just adds another job title discription of the daily duties of a daycare provider: business woman, teacher, nurse/doctor, sanitation cordinator, interior designer, conflict resolution councilor, accountant, chauffer, chef, and 24 hour wet nurse/ human milk factory (or community cow).
blandino 10:30 PM 03-12-2013
I know there are some women here who have been breastfeeding surrogates for children in their care, but for someone to think that you are legally required to BF their child is outrageous.

Also, what if she had not had a young child. Would I, who has never been pregnant - so clearly hasn't produced milk, be legally required to provide breast milk for this woman's child ? :roll eyes:
Starburst 11:23 PM 03-12-2013
Originally Posted by blandino:
I know there are some women here who have been breastfeeding surrogates for children in their care, but for someone to think that you are legally required to BF their child is outrageous.

Also, what if she had not had a young child. Would I, who has never been pregnant - so clearly hasn't produced milk, be legally required to provide breast milk for this woman's child ? :roll eyes:
At one home daycare I worked at one mom donated some of her milk to another mom (I think she didn't make enough and didn't want formula). All most all the daycare families went to the same church so they so they she knew well and had kids thier first kids close to the same age too; I think their second kids were probably only a few days to a few weeks apart. But I personally would at least have them sign an agreement that the one mom acknowleges that her baby will be drinking milk provided by the other mom because it still is a bodily fluid and can potentaly pass some illnesses such as HIV/AIDs and I don't want to be liable for that (since daycare parents legally do not have to tell providers if them or their children have any illness) but I also don't want to discourage this if it is the what the parent thinks is best for their child and they cannot produce enough milk and have a willing donor.
Meyou 03:16 AM 03-13-2013
I had a family tell me my husband wouldn't be allowed in our home when their child was there or it just wouldn't work for them. Ummmm....he lives here.
Play Care 03:25 AM 03-13-2013
Wow, compared to you all I've got nothing!

I recieved a phone call inquiring about day care. When I told the woman my hours she got very offended because I close at 4:45 and she works until 5:00. She went on about it, and I just thought it so odd that she felt it appropriate to complain about my hours - this was just the inital call. If it doesn't work a simple thank you for your time and on to the next call should be how you handle it. I didn't start complaining to her about her paid vacations, 401K and health insurance. Every job has it's perks...

I had one woman when I first started out who wanted me to make major changes to my contract for her. I initally said I would, but after she left thought about it and decided not to take her on. I realized that if I gave in initially I would essentially be allowing her to be the "boss" of my business and anytime she had an issue I would be expected to change things in her favor. Um sorry, it doesn't work that way.
MissAnn 04:02 AM 03-13-2013
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
  1. Wanted me to not use the word NO, and to keep the other kids from saying NO (wanted me to use uh-uh-uh)... I told her NO .
  2. Asked if it was ok with me to feed their son homemade organic food ... sure no problem ... oh wait, she wanted ME to MAKE homemade organic food for her kid. NO.
  3. Wanted me to hold her child when she slept. NO.
  4. Asked if I would take their child at 4:30 am (I opened at 6 am). NO.
  5. Asked that I not nap a 9 month old. NO.
  6. Vehemently argued with me about how she was sure that the USDA program REQUIRED me to supply breast milk.
  7. Asked that I not breastfeed my infant in front of her 4 month old because it would "make him jealous" .
  8. Asked me what I did with the DCK's when I had to go to the bathroom, I answered with "What do YOU do with your kids when you have to go to the bathroom?" ... she moved on to the next question.
Reality TV idea. I'm going to get some of those glasses that have a camera. Then I'm going to go to a provider's house and pretend I am a potential client and ask all of these questions. Would't that be hilarious?
MissAnn 04:08 AM 03-13-2013
Okay this wasn't actually a request but it was outrageous. I had a mom come for an interview and she revealed her husband's sperm count with him standing right there. He seemed to act like this was a normal conversation. The interview went well until I asked for the name of his previous daycare. She seemed very nervous at that point. The interview ended and she never called back.
BumbleBee 04:44 AM 03-13-2013
Originally Posted by Starburst:
That just adds another job title discription of the daily duties of a daycare provider: business woman, teacher, nurse/doctor, sanitation cordinator, interior designer, conflict resolution councilor, accountant, chauffer, chef, and 24 hour wet nurse/ human milk factory (or community cow).
I just choked on my coffee at the community cow comment!
Unregistered 04:55 AM 03-13-2013
You guys are making my day. I thought it was just me that goes through these things!

I had a mom bring another Mom's breakstmilk here too to feed to her baby. They are friends and I get that, but was not comfortable with someone else body fluids being brought into my home. Yikes, what if she had HIV or hepatitis or something?
CedarCreek 05:01 AM 03-13-2013
Originally Posted by Meyou:
I had a family tell me my husband wouldn't be allowed in our home when their child was there or it just wouldn't work for them. Ummmm....he lives here.
I haven't had too many crazies yet but I have had this also! What the heck are people thinking?
Play Care 05:28 AM 03-13-2013
Originally Posted by mrsp'slilpeeps:
Can you help my 7 yr old wipe his bum???

Um nope!!! And they still ask me every once in a while. Can you make sure jonny has a clean bum when he is done?

Still nope!!!


I have a 4 yo that just started in my care in October (previous dc retired). First day he goes in to the bathroom - a few minutes later he calls out "K, I just pooped!" Um, okay? He then asked if I could wipe him....um no. I told him I do not wipe potty trained kids and he would need to do it. Mom had told me he was "fully" potty trained. IMO, that means they can wipe.
Blackcat31 07:22 AM 03-13-2013
Originally Posted by Play Care:


I have a 4 yo that just started in my care in October (previous dc retired). First day he goes in to the bathroom - a few minutes later he calls out "K, I just pooped!" Um, okay? He then asked if I could wipe him....um no. I told him I do not wipe potty trained kids and he would need to do it. Mom had told me he was "fully" potty trained. IMO, that means they can wipe.
I had a DCG do that to me once and when I asked her why she wasn't wiping herself, she said "Well, I think my arms are too short to reach"
KDC 07:57 AM 03-13-2013
DCD: "What are your hours?"
Me: "7am-5pm, my kids have afterschool activities and I promptly close at 5." (this was in the e-mail of prior communications)
DCD: "ummmm, hmmm... I don't get off work until 5:30, so I maybe a smidge late"

DCM: "DCK really seems to like your dog" (DCK is 19 months)
Me: "Me, yes, he's a great laid back dog, but he really doesn't like it when the DCK's pull his tail like that"
DCM: "She just loves dogs"
Me: (locking dog in mud room for his own protection), How do you handle discipline for DCK, time outs, redirect? Oh, DCK is a perfect angel, she hasn't really needed discipline just yet" -- as EVERY bucket has been dumped in the daycare room while 'dad' was watching 'angel' while I spoke with Mom.
Unregistered 11:57 AM 03-13-2013
DCM: My dad says dcb needs two baths a day, since i will be dropping him off at 6am can you give him his morning bath and i will give him his evening bath? SO GET UP EARLIER AND BATHE HIM

DCM: Please dont let anyone touch or kiss my DCG on the face, that really bothers me. UMMM, OKAY

DCM: I have a cousin who is a police officer so i can check background checks and arrest records, etc. GREAT FOR YOU, DO YOU WANT TO GO AHEAD AND GET A COPY OF MINE NOW? ITS ON FILE

DCM: (Calls one night after dcb has been enrolled 3 weeks) We just finished moving in to our new apartment, we havn't had time to go grocery shopping yet and there is no food in the house, dcb (7y) is very hungry and he wants chinese food, oh, and i dont have any cash, do you think i could get your debit card number so that i could order dcb chinese food and then pay you back on friday? NO! IF YOU WOULD LIKE I WILL BRING YOU SOME GROCERIES, YOU STILL HAVEN'T PAID FOR THIS WEEK AND IT IS ALREADY WEDNESDAY. (she was my first client, i never heard from her again. Wanna know the real kicker? She was one of the head ladies at or CPS Office, go figure.......
MotherNature 01:18 PM 03-13-2013
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
  1. Vehemently argued with me about how she was sure that the USDA program REQUIRED me to supply breast milk.
How does that even work?! During interviews, I make sure parents know their kid will see my boob. I breastfeed my son, & he is old enough that he helps himself to it. Course, everyone I've interviewed with has breastfed their child. I would absolutely nurse a baby if asked to, especially if the parent was unable to nurse due to medicine or no milk, or was an adoptive parent & didn't want to try lactation treatments, but did they just expect you to give up your breastmilk? That's weird.
MotherNature 01:23 PM 03-13-2013
Originally Posted by MissAnn:
Okay this wasn't actually a request but it was outrageous. I had a mom come for an interview and she revealed her husband's sperm count with him standing right there. He seemed to act like this was a normal conversation. The interview went well until I asked for the name of his previous daycare. She seemed very nervous at that point. The interview ended and she never called back.
Bizarre & hilarious. You probably dodged a bullet.
MarinaVanessa 01:36 PM 03-13-2013
Originally Posted by MotherNature:
How does that even work?! During interviews, I make sure parents know their kid will see my boob. I breastfeed my son, & he is old enough that he helps himself to it. Course, everyone I've interviewed with has breastfed their child. I would absolutely nurse a baby if asked to, especially if the parent was unable to nurse due to medicine or no milk, or was an adoptive parent & didn't want to try lactation treatments, but did they just expect you to give up your breastmilk? That's weird.
I have no idea how the whole breast feeding thing would have worked especially since I wasn't breast feeding at the time anything .
Starburst 01:42 PM 03-13-2013
Originally Posted by Meyou:
I had a family tell me my husband wouldn't be allowed in our home when their child was there
I would have told them "Well, I guess your child will just never be allowed in my home then. Have a nice day!". Even if he wasn't there during daycare hours I wouldn't take them anyway, just because they were trying to tell you what you can and cannot do in your own home.

Its like they think of you as some teenager who is desprate for a job that is coming to their home watching their tv and eating their food for $10 hour inviting her horny bf over to make out while the kids are glued to the tv- if that is their idea of child care you are way better off without them.
Candy 01:50 PM 03-13-2013
I told the lady i who does my hair i was going to do daycare she asked could i watch her son but don't talk around him
Starburst 01:52 PM 03-13-2013
Originally Posted by MissAnn:
Reality TV idea. I'm going to get some of those glasses that have a camera. Then I'm going to go to a provider's house and pretend I am a potential client and ask all of these questions. Would't that be hilarious?
Why does she think her husbands sperm count has anything to do with now? You already got the kid, unless they are trying to tell you that they used a sperm donor? or they want another kid and want to know if you know anyone willing to donate (husband/bf)?

And If he is so relaxed about this she must tell EVERYONE about it- "Hi Mr. Mailman, did you know my husband has a low sperm count? BTW I want another kid, would you like to support the cause?".
CedarCreek 01:59 PM 03-13-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
DCM: My dad says dcb needs two baths a day, since i will be dropping him off at 6am can you give him his morning bath and i will give him his evening bath? SO GET UP EARLIER AND BATHE HIM

DCM: Please dont let anyone touch or kiss my DCG on the face, that really bothers me. UMMM, OKAY

DCM: I have a cousin who is a police officer so i can check background checks and arrest records, etc. GREAT FOR YOU, DO YOU WANT TO GO AHEAD AND GET A COPY OF MINE NOW? ITS ON FILE

DCM: (Calls one night after dcb has been enrolled 3 weeks) We just finished moving in to our new apartment, we havn't had time to go grocery shopping yet and there is no food in the house, dcb (7y) is very hungry and he wants chinese food, oh, and i dont have any cash, do you think i could get your debit card number so that i could order dcb chinese food and then pay you back on friday? NO! IF YOU WOULD LIKE I WILL BRING YOU SOME GROCERIES, YOU STILL HAVEN'T PAID FOR THIS WEEK AND IT IS ALREADY WEDNESDAY. (she was my first client, i never heard from her again. Wanna know the real kicker? She was one of the head ladies at or CPS Office, go figure.......
@ that last one: WTF??!!
sahm1225 07:04 PM 03-13-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
DCM: My dad says dcb needs two baths a day, since i will be dropping him off at 6am can you give him his morning bath and i will give him his evening bath? SO GET UP EARLIER AND BATHE HIM

DCM: Please dont let anyone touch or kiss my DCG on the face, that really bothers me. UMMM, OKAY

DCM: I have a cousin who is a police officer so i can check background checks and arrest records, etc. GREAT FOR YOU, DO YOU WANT TO GO AHEAD AND GET A COPY OF MINE NOW? ITS ON FILE

DCM: (Calls one night after dcb has been enrolled 3 weeks) We just finished moving in to our new apartment, we havn't had time to go grocery shopping yet and there is no food in the house, dcb (7y) is very hungry and he wants chinese food, oh, and i dont have any cash, do you think i could get your debit card number so that i could order dcb chinese food and then pay you back on friday? NO! IF YOU WOULD LIKE I WILL BRING YOU SOME GROCERIES, YOU STILL HAVEN'T PAID FOR THIS WEEK AND IT IS ALREADY WEDNESDAY. (she was my first client, i never heard from her again. Wanna know the real kicker? She was one of the head ladies at or CPS Office, go figure.......

Wow!!!
I've heard the 'no kissing' rule before. It's crazy!
Play Care 11:24 AM 03-14-2013
Originally Posted by sahm1225:
Wow!!!
I've heard the 'no kissing' rule before. It's crazy!
I'll be honest, I am a "no kissing" day care. One of my dc kids gets what mom calls "fever blisters" Um, no honey it's HERPES. We can high five and call it a day
Patches 11:30 AM 03-14-2013
DCM: When he gets really upset, just put him in a room by himself and lock the door so he can't get out until he calms down.

Me: I can't (and won't) do that

DCM: Oh, well that's what my doctor told me to do


Unregistered 11:37 AM 03-14-2013
omg these are too funny.. I can't think of any good ones off the top of my head. I will have to think and come back.
Heidi 04:27 PM 03-14-2013
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
  1. Wanted me to not use the word NO, and to keep the other kids from saying NO (wanted me to use uh-uh-uh)... I told her NO .
  2. Asked if it was ok with me to feed their son homemade organic food ... sure no problem ... oh wait, she wanted ME to MAKE homemade organic food for her kid. NO.
  3. Wanted me to hold her child when she slept. NO.
  4. Asked if I would take their child at 4:30 am (I opened at 6 am). NO.
  5. Asked that I not nap a 9 month old. NO.
  6. Vehemently argued with me about how she was sure that the USDA program REQUIRED me to supply breast milk.
  7. Asked that I not breastfeed my infant in front of her 4 month old because it would "make him jealous" .
  8. Asked me what I did with the DCK's when I had to go to the bathroom, I answered with "What do YOU do with your kids when you have to go to the bathroom?" ... she moved on to the next question.

DaisyMamma 04:36 PM 03-14-2013
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
THAT was my question . But she whole heartedly thought that I was required to provide it. I tried explaining to her that she needed to call them back and get clarification because I was allowed to serve it but that the mom needed to supply it, not me. She never called back.
Why would you want to have your kid drinking someone else's bodily fluids anyway?

Originally Posted by Unregistered:
DCM: My dad says dcb needs two baths a day, since i will be dropping him off at 6am can you give him his morning bath and i will give him his evening bath? SO GET UP EARLIER AND BATHE HIM

DCM: Please dont let anyone touch or kiss my DCG on the face, that really bothers me. UMMM, OKAY

DCM: I have a cousin who is a police officer so i can check background checks and arrest records, etc. GREAT FOR YOU, DO YOU WANT TO GO AHEAD AND GET A COPY OF MINE NOW? ITS ON FILE

DCM: (Calls one night after dcb has been enrolled 3 weeks) We just finished moving in to our new apartment, we havn't had time to go grocery shopping yet and there is no food in the house, dcb (7y) is very hungry and he wants chinese food, oh, and i dont have any cash, do you think i could get your debit card number so that i could order dcb chinese food and then pay you back on friday? NO! IF YOU WOULD LIKE I WILL BRING YOU SOME GROCERIES, YOU STILL HAVEN'T PAID FOR THIS WEEK AND IT IS ALREADY WEDNESDAY. (she was my first client, i never heard from her again. Wanna know the real kicker? She was one of the head ladies at or CPS Office, go figure.......
OMG!
What's wrong with people?!
frgsonmysox 08:54 PM 03-14-2013
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25:
I've been given permission to swat a child on the butt (which doesn't seem all that weird, just not in the scope of what I would EVER do).

I think one of my interview kickers was the one who put me on the spot about CPR protocals for an infant. I totally flubbed the question...but was really offended by being put on the spot. That mom also nursed her son (yay!) during the interview...using the "pull down the shirt from the top and leave the whole boob hanging out" method. Um, okay...nursing is great, but you *can* do it discretely...

Oh, and "So, the children are in the kitchen with you while you make lunch, right?" Um...nope, I just got done telling you that while I make lunch they play in the playroom *right beside the kitchen*. I can see most of the room from most of the kitchen. They are *right there*. And yes I do gate them out of the kitchen while I cook...it's safer that way. And the law in my state is "visual OR auditory range" so I'm perfectly fine doing that.


Those are probably the craziest, though I may have blocked some doozies out of my memory.
REALLY?! THATS your craziest? You'd hate me. I nurse all the time, uncovered, everywhere, and I generally pull it out over the top. ALL my daycare families have witnessed this, I've done it during all my interviews, and no one seems bothered. It's a boob. It's not a big deal.

Originally Posted by Unregistered:
You guys are making my day. I thought it was just me that goes through these things!

I had a mom bring another Mom's breakstmilk here too to feed to her baby. They are friends and I get that, but was not comfortable with someone else body fluids being brought into my home. Yikes, what if she had HIV or hepatitis or something?

you are a bit uneducated about nursing. I'm sorry, but this is a huge deal to me. THIS is what I'm studying, to become an IBCLC. There is so much negativity and misconceptions about nursing...

But the comment about the USDA and nursing had me CRACKING up.
Starburst 10:17 PM 03-14-2013
Originally Posted by Starburst:
Why does she think her husbands sperm count has anything to do with now? You already got the kid, unless they are trying to tell you that they used a sperm donor? or they want another kid and want to know if you know anyone willing to donate (husband/bf)?

And If he is so relaxed about this she must tell EVERYONE about it- "Hi Mr. Mailman, did you know my husband has a low sperm count? BTW I want another kid, would you like to support the cause?".
Oops I quoted the wrong quote (though that would make a good reality tv show prank) and it wont let me edit I ment to quote:


Originally Posted by MissAnn:
Okay this wasn't actually a request but it was outrageous. I had a mom come for an interview and she revealed her husband's sperm count with him standing right there. He seemed to act like this was a normal conversation. The interview went well until I asked for the name of his previous daycare. She seemed very nervous at that point. The interview ended and she never called back.

SilverSabre25 06:25 AM 03-15-2013
Originally Posted by frgsonmysox:
REALLY?! THATS your craziest? You'd hate me. I nurse all the time, uncovered, everywhere, and I generally pull it out over the top. ALL my daycare families have witnessed this, I've done it during all my interviews, and no one seems bothered. It's a boob. It's not a big deal.
I'm sorry I offended you so much...? It wasn't a big deal, it was just surprising. I wouldn't hate you...I don't have a problem with it, it just seemed a bit...over the top...to do at a daycare interview when you've known someone for less than fifteen minutes. She did it directly after the flubbed CPR question and she was looking at me out of the corner of her eye, and I got a definite vibe that she was doing it quite deliberately to see my reaction. I didn't react at all, I kept it all internal, but the interview slid totally downhill from there.

FWIW, I'm glad to see you back around the forum; I've missed you We need more AP-inspired providers 'round here. Most of them seem to leave.
nannyde 06:56 AM 03-15-2013
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25:
I'm sorry I offended you so much...? It wasn't a big deal, it was just surprising. I wouldn't hate you...I don't have a problem with it, it just seemed a bit...over the top...to do at a daycare interview when you've known someone for less than fifteen minutes. She did it directly after the flubbed CPR question and she was looking at me out of the corner of her eye, and I got a definite vibe that she was doing it quite deliberately to see my reaction. I didn't react at all, I kept it all internal, but the interview slid totally downhill from there.

FWIW, I'm glad to see you back around the forum; I've missed you We need more AP-inspired providers 'round here. Most of them seem to leave.
The AP providers leave in part because they don't make it too long doing child care.

I'm SO ready for an interviewee to do the public breast feeding deal-e-o in my house. I got got with that over Thanksgiving when my son and I visited my cousin... at the Thanksgiving dinner table to boot and in front of my twelve year old son.

I'm ready now... I won't get got again.

Next time this happens I'm going to video tape it of my my nifty new Galaxy Note 2 and instantly put it up on Facebook, Youtube, and link it to my twitter. That's gonna go viral immediately.

Whip out the breast in FULL VIEW and I'm going to whip out my camera in FULL view. Time to GO PUBLIC.

Game on
Holiday Park 07:14 AM 03-15-2013
Daisymomma breastmilk donation is far healhier than formula feeding. With that said , I do know noy everyone knows they can get donor milk or even find a donor in their area tomeet their child's constant needs, without having to pay shipping costs etc...
A lot of moms DO make sure the donor has a medical file on hand proving. What she has/soesn't have n regards to disease and immunities. I do. I have donated, wet nursed a daycare baby (mom asked me to and I felt honored to help out) , and am currently using donor milk for my son until I can re-build my own supply back after a major decrease from being too busy working to pump.
SilverSabre25 07:17 AM 03-15-2013
Originally Posted by nannyde:
The AP providers leave in part because they don't make it too long doing child care.

I'm SO ready for an interviewee to do the public breast feeding deal-e-o in my house. I got got with that over Thanksgiving when my son and I visited my cousin... at the Thanksgiving dinner table to boot and in front of my twelve year old son.

I'm ready now... I won't get got again.

Next time this happens I'm going to video tape it of my my nifty new Galaxy Note 2 and instantly put it up on Facebook, Youtube, and link it to my twitter. That's gonna go viral immediately.

Whip out the breast in FULL VIEW and I'm going to whip out my camera in FULL view. Time to GO PUBLIC.

Game on
Actually I think the AP type providers don't stick around the forum because the forum is very disapproving of that style of caregiving...I know a lot of AP providers 'round me who have been in the business for quite awhile.
Holiday Park 07:22 AM 03-15-2013
The worst request I have ever had is from my own sister . When my niece was around 14-18months she didn't want anyone saying the word NO because of it being "negative" . "Tah-Tah" was the replacement phrase. I love that child almost like my own but she is now 2.5 and my sister still can't discipline her and she is such a mess .
The second craziest thing was a mom of a 12 month girl during interview asked if I had a full size crib to use, because she had never been in a pack in play before. To rock her to sleep and give her a bottle in the crib, because she will cry so hard she will throw up if she is made to cry at all and not rocked&held to sleep. I said no and that was the end of that.
Edited to say oops I meant to say if se would cry&throw up if she was NOT rocked&held to sleep.
ABCDaycareMN 07:33 AM 03-15-2013
Originally Posted by nannyde:
The AP providers leave in part because they don't make it too long doing child care.

I'm SO ready for an interviewee to do the public breast feeding deal-e-o in my house. I got got with that over Thanksgiving when my son and I visited my cousin... at the Thanksgiving dinner table to boot and in front of my twelve year old son.

I'm ready now... I won't get got again.

Next time this happens I'm going to video tape it of my my nifty new Galaxy Note 2 and instantly put it up on Facebook, Youtube, and link it to my twitter. That's gonna go viral immediately.

Whip out the breast in FULL VIEW and I'm going to whip out my camera in FULL view. Time to GO PUBLIC.

Game on
What is AP style of Childcare?
SilverSabre25 07:38 AM 03-15-2013
Originally Posted by ABCDaycareMN:
What is AP style of Childcare?
That would be caregiving based on/inspired by Attachment Parenting Principles. I also am heavily influenced by RIE/Magda Gerber's (http://www.janetlansbury.com) teachings, which while different from Attachment Parenting, is very compatible and similar in many ways.

I find that most people on here get hung up on the "Parenting" in Attachment Parenting and also assume that it's a ******** set of rules and a black and white "either you do it all or you do none" sort of thing, when in fact it's more of a mindset and it's very easy to use many AP principles in a child care setting, if you want to.
Lyss 07:43 AM 03-15-2013
I had a parent ask me how I was going to "put [my] DD 2nd" and make her DD feel "special" when she is here. Ummm my DD will never feel "2nd" and I have other DCKs that need to feel "special" too. Plus this DCG "had" to be held to sleep and carried around (no back/front pack, as she feels "restricted") when not playing and was "never" to play alone

NEXT!
Holiday Park 07:47 AM 03-15-2013
A lot of them don't beleive in sleep training of any kind, and feel its best to by "intuition" instead of any kid of childcare training/parenting books. I have done both AP and mon and went back to non, ater reading some parenting books and becoming more educated about the importance of having a schedule and sleep training from an early age (if done early enough cio is usually not needed) . People are always impressed by my childrens acheivements and what I've done with them , and how dh&I interact with them. But when they dont meet my kids or actually see how we parent and only know that i do sleep train , beleive in cio ( if needed) , strollers, cribs, even spanking I look like this horribly strict mean parent that must not love my children , and oh the poor kids must be suffering and unhappy. I personally feel judged by AP parents on the internet (and have been verbally attacked ) on the parenting forums like babycenter . Maybe they feel judged here , who knows.
nannyde 07:52 AM 03-15-2013
Originally Posted by Lyss:
I had a parent ask me how I was going to "put [my] DD 2nd" and make her DD feel "special" when she is here. Ummm my DD will never feel "2nd" and I have other DCKs that need to feel "special" too. Plus this DCG "had" to be held to sleep and carried around (no back/front pack, as she feels "restricted") when not playing and was "never" to play alone

NEXT!
There it is

I'll be happy to accomodate that if you give me a grand a week. Then we would all be getting special.
ABCDaycareMN 07:53 AM 03-15-2013
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25:
That would be caregiving based on/inspired by Attachment Parenting Principles. I also am heavily influenced by RIE/Magda Gerber's (http://www.janetlansbury.com) teachings, which while different from Attachment Parenting, is very compatible and similar in many ways.

I find that most people on here get hung up on the "Parenting" in Attachment Parenting and also assume that it's a ******** set of rules and a black and white "either you do it all or you do none" sort of thing, when in fact it's more of a mindset and it's very easy to use many AP principles in a child care setting, if you want to.
Thanks for that clarification.
Unregistered 08:47 AM 03-15-2013
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25:
Actually I think the AP type providers don't stick around the forum because the forum is very disapproving of that style of caregiving...I know a lot of AP providers 'round me who have been in the business for quite awhile.
I agree.
nannyde 10:14 AM 03-15-2013
Originally Posted by frgsonmysox:
REALLY?! THATS your craziest? You'd hate me. I nurse all the time, uncovered, everywhere, and I generally pull it out over the top. ALL my daycare families have witnessed this, I've done it during all my interviews, and no one seems bothered. It's a boob. It's not a big deal.
I wouldn't hate ya. I'd tape ya.
EntropyControlSpecialist 11:11 AM 03-15-2013
Originally Posted by Holiday Park:
Daisymomma breastmilk donation is far healhier than formula feeding. With that said , I do know noy everyone knows they can get donor milk or even find a donor in their area tomeet their child's constant needs, without having to pay shipping costs etc...
A lot of moms DO make sure the donor has a medical file on hand proving. What she has/soesn't have n regards to disease and immunities. I do. I have donated, wet nursed a daycare baby (mom asked me to and I felt honored to help out) , and am currently using donor milk for my son until I can re-build my own supply back after a major decrease from being too busy working to pump.
Absolutely. There is no comparison. You go mama!
Angelsj 05:11 PM 03-15-2013
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25:
Actually I think the AP type providers don't stick around the forum because the forum is very disapproving of that style of caregiving...I know a lot of AP providers 'round me who have been in the business for quite awhile.
Thank you. I think you are pretty dead on.

Been doing this "AP" style for over 35 years and still going strong. Not everyone does things the same way, and it is ok, but my way works for me and the high handed attitude around here sometimes about what is the "right" way gets a little annoying.
littlemissmuffet 10:36 PM 03-15-2013
Originally Posted by EntropyControlSpecialist:
Absolutely. There is no comparison. You go mama!
Actually, there are more and more studies showing that there is very little long-term significant differences in formula-fed babies vs BM fed babies.
MissAnn 05:34 AM 03-16-2013
Originally Posted by littlemissmuffet:
Actually, there are more and more studies showing that there is very little long-term significant differences in formula-fed babies vs BM fed babies.
BM fed just sounds so wrong....
Lavender 08:27 AM 03-16-2013
I've donated breastmilk! I donated to a friend's daughter (friend could not nurse) enough to last her the first 3 months. I donated to a foster child who was born preemie who could not tolerate formula, and I donated to a friend's 31 week preemie from birth until 5ish months old.

This thread is hilarious! I work in a daycare center so we don't get so many crazy things. There is one child whose parents come in with a new diaper changing routine every week it feels like. It's usually something like "change 1x per hour, wipe with wet wash cloth, dry with special drying wash cloth, apply these products in this order ___, then put on diaper as loose as humanely possible (ensuring a blowout almost every time of course).
just_peachy 08:41 AM 03-16-2013
Originally Posted by Angelsj:
Thank you. I think you are pretty dead on.

Been doing this "AP" style for over 35 years and still going strong. Not everyone does things the same way, and it is ok, but my way works for me and the high handed attitude around here sometimes about what is the "right" way gets a little annoying.
I'm new here and I noticed that immediately. My oldest is 7, I practiced AP before I even knew it was a "thing." Discovered Dr. Sears when he was about 6 months old and never went back.

It CAN work in a daycare setting. I have modified some things and streamlined others, but, as with anything else, practice makes perfect!

I almost deleted my account a couple of times because the anti-AP slant started to get to me, but I reminded myself that WE ALL DO WHAT WE THINK IS BEST and I truly believe that. What more could a DCP ask for? Besides, I've picked up way more positive from around here than negative.
Live and Learn 09:39 AM 03-16-2013
Originally Posted by nannyde:
The AP providers leave in part because they don't make it too long doing child care.

I'm SO ready for an interviewee to do the public breast feeding deal-e-o in my house. I got got with that over Thanksgiving when my son and I visited my cousin... at the Thanksgiving dinner table to boot and in front of my twelve year old son.

I'm ready now... I won't get got again.

Next time this happens I'm going to video tape it of my my nifty new Galaxy Note 2 and instantly put it up on Facebook, Youtube, and link it to my twitter. That's gonna go viral immediately.

Whip out the breast in FULL VIEW and I'm going to whip out my camera in FULL view. Time to GO PUBLIC.

Game on
Why so hostile? You went to your cousin's house and she breast fed in her own house. IN HER OWN HOUSE!! I nursed my twins until they were two and a half. I'm a busty gal. The only way to nurse them both comfortably for me was on the sofa with a footstool. Guess what? People who visited my house saw my boobs sometimes. Big woooooop!!

I've been to family member's houses were they said and did things that weren't illegal but I found personally offensive. Do I whip out my IPhone and up load a video to the Internet? Of course not ...that is ridiculous!!! What purpose would that serve?

I just wonder why you are so hostile toward a mom who is breastfeeding her own baby (in her own house) when that is what the leading experts suggest we all do? Just because it is something you didn't, wouldn't, couldn't do does not make it wrong for others to do.
nannyde 10:39 AM 03-16-2013
Originally Posted by Live and Learn:
Why so hostile? You went to your cousin's house and she breast fed in her own house. IN HER OWN HOUSE!! I nursed my twins until they were two and a half. I'm a busty gal. The only way to nurse them both comfortably for me was on the sofa with a footstool. Guess what? People who visited my house saw my boobs sometimes. Big woooooop!!

I've been to family member's houses were they said and did things that weren't illegal but I found personally offensive. Do I whip out my IPhone and up load a video to the Internet? Of course not ...that is ridiculous!!! What purpose would that serve?

I just wonder why you are so hostile toward a mom who is breastfeeding her own baby (in her own house) when that is what the leading experts suggest we all do? Just because it is something you didn't, wouldn't, couldn't do does not make it wrong for others to do.
Hostile would be a very very mild summary of my opinion on this after being blindsided by someone who exercised her rights at my 12 year old sons expense.

I don't know how you got that my cousin was bf'ing her kid in her own home. Her youngest is 15 :-)
Live and Learn 10:54 AM 03-16-2013
Originally Posted by nannyde:
over Thanksgiving when my son and I visited my cousin... at the Thanksgiving dinner table to boot and in front of my twelve year old son.
your words
nannyde 11:09 AM 03-16-2013
Originally Posted by Live and Learn:
your words
I didn't say it was my cousin and that she was feeding her own child in her own home. I said I got got AT my cousins house at Thanksgiving.
nannyde 11:36 AM 03-16-2013
Originally Posted by Live and Learn:
your words
https://www.daycare.com/forum/showth...t=thanksgiving

I posted the story starting in the eighties in that thread. I have three/four posts about it.
melilley 01:37 PM 03-16-2013
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
  1. Wanted me to not use the word NO, and to keep the other kids from saying NO (wanted me to use uh-uh-uh)... I told her NO .
  2. Asked if it was ok with me to feed their son homemade organic food ... sure no problem ... oh wait, she wanted ME to MAKE homemade organic food for her kid. NO.
  3. Wanted me to hold her child when she slept. NO.
  4. Asked if I would take their child at 4:30 am (I opened at 6 am). NO.
  5. Asked that I not nap a 9 month old. NO.
  6. Vehemently argued with me about how she was sure that the USDA program REQUIRED me to supply breast milk.
  7. Asked that I not breastfeed my infant in front of her 4 month old because it would "make him jealous" .
  8. Asked me what I did with the DCK's when I had to go to the bathroom, I answered with "What do YOU do with your kids when you have to go to the bathroom?" ... she moved on to the next question.
Ok, I had to laugh at the breast milk remarks! Come on!
Live and Learn 01:59 PM 03-16-2013
I think many people reading your description of events in this thread (not the one from years ago) might assume as I did that it was the cousin nursing in her home.

I personally find your cousin's deceased husband's stepfather's daughter or extended relative immodest but since you brought it up in your older thread......you had never spoken to a twelve year old about breast feeding?

It not the breast feeding part of the story I find shocking but that you, a nurse, had never spoken to your twelve year old about this. Im sure he has either witnessed it or at least heard about it before that Thanksgiving. Twelve year old boys talk. Three of my sons are teens.

Again, I think that young mom was less modest than she should have been. I just don't understand your hostility in breast feeding in general.
nannyde 04:01 PM 03-16-2013
Originally Posted by Live and Learn:
I think many people reading your description of events in this thread (not the one from years ago) might assume as I did that it was the cousin nursing in her home.

I personally find your cousin's deceased husband's stepfather's daughter or extended relative immodest but since you brought it up in your older thread......you had never spoken to a twelve year old about breast feeding?

It not the breast feeding part of the story I find shocking but that you, a nurse, had never spoken to your twelve year old about this. Im sure he has either witnessed it or at least heard about it before that Thanksgiving. Twelve year old boys talk. Three of my sons are teens.

Again, I think that young mom was less modest than she should have been. I just don't understand your hostility in breast feeding in general.
You assume a LOT.

First, this wasn't a "young" mother. She is a FORTY year old woman with FOUR kids and the oldest is a FULL grown adult. Get the visual now? Why in the world would you assume she was YOUNG?

She's been on this planet long enough to KNOW better than to behave like that in front of a total STRANGER pre-teen male child at a dang holiday dinner. You aren't shocked by that?

Secondly, my kid is twelve. Of course I haven't discussed breast feeding with him. Why the HECK would I do that and what the HECK does that have to do with me being a nurse?

I haven't discussed formula with him.
I haven't discussed stage two baby food with him.
I haven't discussed puff cereal with him.
I haven't discussed hepatitis with him.
I haven't discussed weapons of mass destruction with him.
I haven't discussed toenail care of the elderly with him.

Want me to go on?

He's a pre teen who is currently up at the lake with a fishing rod trying to catch a bass in the middle of March in Iowa. That's how much HE knows.

Can you POSSIBLY conceive how completely REDICULOUS it would be for me to discuss BREAST FEEDING with him? Why the hail would I do that? What difference does it make to him? Why in the world would I bring something like that up to a young boy when NOTHING in his life whatsoever has to do with infants? He's hopefully YEARS away from being a parent.

Maybe I SHOULD give him an education. Maybe I need to teach him the art of education escalation. Maybe I need to help him develop a plan to GET an education the NEXT time a Mama is exposing her breast while feeding her little precious in public. Maybe I should encourage him to seize the opportunity and get that education by sitting three dang feet away and asking
lots
and lots
and LOTS
of questions. Maybe I should encourage him to video and share via his Facebook, twitter, and youtube with that handy dandy "where are you located" button so he can invite others to come and share the public experience with him, the baby, and Mama. That would work great in the mall!

Maybe I should encourage him to share HIS feelings about the experience him and the viewing public get during little darlins feeding to the feeding Mommy. He's real chatty and he has an opinion about everything.

It's natural and best for the baby and all. Why shouldn't he have a total experience and share that experience with his little world and the big wide world? Why would he need to learn about this from me when there are so many real life mommies out there doing the real thing? Let the public breastfeeders field his education in this matter.... They are surely more adept at it then his mama nurse would EVER be.

Yathink? Time to "go public" and "in your face".

That can go both ways. Maybe he needs to learn that.
Live and Learn 04:35 PM 03-16-2013
Funny how you never answered why you are so hostile toward breastfeeding mothers.
Lucy 04:51 PM 03-16-2013
Someone unleashed the Angry Spice.



nannyde 05:07 PM 03-16-2013
Originally Posted by Live and Learn:
Funny how you never answered why you are so hostile toward breastfeeding mothers.
I have only had one formula fed baby in the last four years. I do the WORK of managing breast milk and the care of the breast fed child every single working day. All it takes is one formula fed baby in four years to bring home how much EASIER it would be to just do formula infant care. I spend more time in one day managing breast milk receiving, storing, heatIng, and parent conferencing then I spend in a MONTH receiving, heating, storing, and parent conferencing for a formula fed infant.

Don't accuse me of being hostile to breastfeeding mothers. I willingly and gladly do the work to make it happen for nearly every infant I raise.

I.m hostile about blindsiding people in public and forcing them to view your breast so you can do whats best for you and your baby. We should be considerate and understand that the public may have differing levels of comfort and modesty. When simple solutions are readily available then the greater good should be considered.
nannyde 05:10 PM 03-16-2013
Originally Posted by Lucy:
Someone unleashed the Angry Spice.


Yes in the middle of thanksgiving dinner.
bubbiesmama807 05:44 PM 03-16-2013
Getting back to the topic at hand..

1. I have had parents tell me to spank their child if they misbehave, which I refuse to do. I used to watch a four-year-old who was a friend's son (yeah I know..big mistake and I definately learned my lesson anyway), and he had a lot of behavior problems while in my care and at home as well. Whenever I would tell his grandparents about his behavior in my home, their only response would be "bust his butt", which of course I wouldn't do. His mom's reaction would be to get right up in his face and scream at him, hit him, and things like that..the poor kid was clearly scared of his mother, and it was no wonder that his behavior would get worse as time went on, and that I terminated care. I am no longer friends with his mother, which came as no surprise, and I don't think the child in question is even living with her anymore.

2. Years ago I worked with my mother, and a mother of a little girl (it's been many years, but if memory serves me correctly she was around 3-4 years old) told us to put alum on her child's tongue when she misbehaved, and if she cursed since she and the child's grandmother were having problems with her cursing at the time. She even brought a container of alum, and we refused to use it. We terminated care not just because of that, but after the child told us about how Mommy's boyfriend put his hand down her pants, we had to contact authorities. Months later my mom saw the mother of this child out in public, and she proceeded to start screaming at my mother about how we caused her to lose custody of her child.

3. Also there was another parent who informed us to punish her two children (I think they were school-aged) by putting a drop of dish detergent in their mouths and then have them drink water. Wasn't going to happen.

4. A couple years ago I had a gentleman contact me for child care for his four-year-old daughter and two-year-old son. When he came by for an interview he made some comments about my home (I live in a mobile home, which I take very good care of, and it is in a well-taken care of community)..he admitted he was expecting a dirty house with a lot of cats, because of the type of home I live in.Then he asked me if my boyfriend/now-husband (who at the time was unemployed but helping me with the children until he got a job) and I were married, and I said no. He asked if my son was my boyfriend/now-husband's son, and I explained that my son was from a previous relationship. He then said rather huffily, "Well our children are me and my wife's children..WE don't have children with anybody else". My reaction was I was shocked (and offended) because me not being with my child's bio-dad was never an issue to anybody else but this guy, and was irrelevant in regards to my qualifications as a child care provider.
Live and Learn 05:50 PM 03-16-2013
Originally Posted by nannyde:
for nearly every infant I raise.
Every infant YOU raise? So now you write your daycare kids off of your taxes and put them through college?...oh boy.

That young or old, or wrinkled, or sexy, or Asian, or fat, or grumpy, or liberal, or flatulent mom breast fed her child. Get over it.... And consider teaching your kid what breasts are meant to do.

Read through your last few posts including the old thread you referenced and tell me there is no hostility.

I wish PEACE AND THE UNDERSTANDING that just because someone does something that you wouldn't or you couldn't does not make it WRONG!
Lucy 05:54 PM 03-16-2013
Originally Posted by Live and Learn:
Every infant YOU raise? So now you write your daycare kids off of your taxes and put them through college?...oh boy.

That young or old, or wrinkled, or sexy, or Asian, or fat, or grumpy, or liberal, or flatulent mom breast fed her child. Get over it.... And consider teaching your kid what breasts are meant to do.

Read through your last few posts including the old thread you referenced and tell me there is no hostility.

I wish PEACE AND THE UNDERSTANDING that just because someone does something that you wouldn't or you couldn't does not make it WRONG!
I think I love you.
MissAnn 06:01 PM 03-16-2013
Originally Posted by Live and Learn:
Every infant YOU raise? So now you write your daycare kids off of your taxes and put them through college?...oh boy.

That young or old, or wrinkled, or sexy, or Asian, or fat, or grumpy, or liberal, or flatulent mom breast fed her child. Get over it.... And consider teaching your kid what breasts are meant to do.

Read through your last few posts including the old thread you referenced and tell me there is no hostility.

I wish PEACE AND THE UNDERSTANDING that just because someone does something that you wouldn't or you couldn't does not make it WRONG!
Can we please knock it off? She is not against breast feeding, enough said? You are picking fights and its giving me a headache.
Live and Learn 06:17 PM 03-16-2013
I'm not picking a fight. I'm simply tired of her authoritative hostility. But I'm done. Good night and peace.
nannyde 06:32 PM 03-16-2013
Originally Posted by Live and Learn:
Every infant YOU raise? So now you write your daycare kids off of your taxes and put them through college?...oh boy.

That young or old, or wrinkled, or sexy, or Asian, or fat, or grumpy, or liberal, or flatulent mom breast fed her child. Get over it.... And consider teaching your kid what breasts are meant to do.

Read through your last few posts including the old thread you referenced and tell me there is no hostility.

I wish PEACE AND THE UNDERSTANDING that just because someone does something that you wouldn't or you couldn't does not make it WRONG!
A 40 year old complete stranger woman exposed her full breast to my complete stranger child three feet away from him during Thanksgiving dinner. I don't care if she was feeding her child or not. It happened and I shouldn't get over it.

I need to tell this story because it is a perfect example of no matter HOW inconsiderate, rude, and indecent it is to expose your full breast in public and how young and defenseless the child is you did it too.. there will always be people on the internet who beat you up for being upset about it and stomp their feet saying they have the right to do what they want for THEIR child. There's no limit to when where and how the breast feeding moms get to exercise their rights and do what's best for them and theirs.

Is there ANY situation where you feel a woman shouldn't be able to pull out her fully exposed breast to feed her child? Is it okay during a wedding? Okay during a funeral? Okay in open court? Okay during a presidential inaguration? Okay in the public school classroom filled with middle school boys and girls? Okay when you are interviewing complete stranger day care dads for their childs possible slot in your day care? Thanksgiving dinner with a stranger twelve year old?

I'm not talking about breast feeding where your breast is not exposed. I'm talking about fully open breast publicly. Is there ANY situation where you think it would be inapropriate?

I do raise children. That's been my business for nearly 35 years. Raise as in "bring up".
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