Hi!
I'm a new childcare provider. My very first daycare child (16 months old) started this week. The parents seemed concerned about the cost of daycare, so we agreed that they would pay "x" amount per day if they provided all of the child's food, "x+$4" per day if I provided 1 meal and 2 snacks, "x+$5" if I provided 2 meals and 2 snacks (probably unnecessary, since he's here from 9:00-5:30, and would probably go home for dinner, but I wanted all the bases covered). They assured me that, if they chose to have me provide the food, he eats anything, and I can serve whatever I want to.

This is the third day, and so far, everything with the child and the parents is lovely. Everything except the food.

They chose to provide the food, and the first day, the mom dropped him off with multiple sippy's of milk and juice, and four ziplock baggies: teddy grahams, puffs, cheezeits, and some sort of wafer cookies. I was taken aback, I never expected this to be what the parents would send! I didn't see what she had sent until she left for work, and even if I had, I wouldn't have known what to say. I thought, "It's the first day, and she's in a rush. Surely, tomorrow she'll actually pack him some real food." I packed up everything that was left over (a lot, because she sent so much in each baggie) and sent it all back home with him. The next day, she sent the same 4 baggies that I'd sent home with the leftovers in them, and more milk and juice. I sent them home again at the end of the day. Today, the same 4 baggies of food, but more juice, and less milk (so... even less nutrition).

The dad will usually be picking the child up, but yesterday it was his grandmother, and grandma's picking up again today, so I won't be able to speak to either parent in person today.

What do I do? Surely this isn't how they feed him at home (he seems very healthy, and the parents said he eats anything)??? I wish now that I had just quoted the higher price and told them that I would provide all food. I told them that it was their choice, and it's only been 3 days, I can't suddenly have a policy change can I, especially since this is my only daycare child? HELP!

Reply

This is why I have always provided food. What happens when you get the next child and now Johnny is having cookies and Susie is getting an apple oh and then you get Paul who has a piece of leftover birthday cake! I would tell that we really need to get on the same page about food. I would explain to them that I thought you would provide a "meal" for johnny. A meal consists of a protein, grain, 2 servings of veg/fruit and milk. I think that I really need to change this and provide the food. Lunch will have the components already stated and snacks will have 2 of the components. This way you won't have the stress of packing food and Johnnie won't be wanting my lunch!

Reply

I also provide all food. You could check into the food program, I highly recommend it!

Reply

I do already have this, a little bit, because my own child (3 1/2) is, of course, eating something different. Then I feel bad, because my kid is eating a meal , and daycare baby is sitting there eating crackers. How should I phrase it to the mother, though? They just started, and I told her it was her choice to bring food, or not. I never considered that I'd have to specify the type of food. After telling her it's her choice, how do I now say, "Nevermind, I'm doing it. (So now you have to pay me more)"

Reply

Was that just for snack or was that his lunch too?? I would absolutely provide the food, PP is right when she says you will run into all kinds of trouble when you get more kids and they want what another child has. Plus, what a pain for you to keep track of their payment based on all of that. What if it's different on different days. Like mom sends all the food one day, just a snack the next etc. You need to charge a rate for your services, including food and that's it, no negotiating! This is your business, take charge now before it gets out of hand

Reply

Is there somewhere I can read about the food program? How long does it take to get on it?

Reply

double post

Reply

That was it. Lunch, snack, everything. For the past 3 days.

I'm with you. How should I approach it? I need some ideas for wording.

Reply

ummm, I'm thinking that could be considered neglect and I would want no part of that. Are you licensed? If so, I'm sure that wouldn't be allowed so that would be a good place to start in the conversation. Even if you aren't you can say you go by the state guidelines!

If you are still willing to let them bring snacks (I wouldn't but that's just me) then give them a list of food options to choose from and tell them he must be eating a healthy well balanced diet while in your care. I'm betting they would stop and just let you provide all food

Reply

Can someone give me some editing/feedback on this (probably will send it as a facebook private message, since I won't actually see either parent today):

Hey, [daycare mom]!
I wanted to touch base with you about [daycare child]'s food. I'm concerned that he's not getting the variety that he needs because you're having to pack it every morning. I thought that you'd be packing him regular meals (with protein, fruits and vegetables along with the grains and milk), but I realize now that that is a lot for you to have to do in the morning, and maybe we should have just had me provide it from the start. I think that I should probably start providing the food next week. I'd provide him a lunch (with protein, fruit, vegetables, and grains, plus milk), and two snacks each day (made up of at least 2 of those four categories). It would probably be easier for you, and also be easier on [daycare child], because he and [my child] will be eating the same thing, and he won't have to wonder why he cant have what he sees [my child] having. Let me know what you think. - [MyName]

Reply

I'm not. I am legally unlicensed (fewer than 6 children). I know that it is untenable. I'm sure that they feed him more healthily at home, and are not neglectful (they told me that they removed him from another daycare once because the provider didn't change him often enough). I know they care about him. I just don't know how to educate them on appropriate nutrition without sounding concescending. KWIM? I want to maintain a good relationship. I'd like to continue caring for this child, and I don't want them to be humiliated.

Reply

You can still tell them you are following the state guidelines for food and you want to promote healthy eating at your daycare. Your are being nice in your letter though, I would take out the probably's and maybe's and be a little more firm about it.

Reply

Adding: I don't know what they eat at home but if they felt comfortable sending that kind of food and nothing at all with nutritional value it makes me wonder...people usually want to get off to a good start and do better in the beginning before they slack off. You are being very nice to them, I wouldn't have allowed that past my door after the 1st day.

Reply

You're giving them too many ways to say "no". Be confident, you want to provide food and that's great. It's not up to them so don't ask. I'd say something like: hey DCM! I've realized over the past week or so that doing different meals for everyone is taking a lot of extra time and I am no longer able to accommodate that. I'll be providing meals from here on out at an additional rate of xx. Thank yo so much for understanding! I've enjoyed having dck here this past week! Good luck! I started off allowing food from home too...never again lol.

Reply

Okay, this is what I just sent her on Facebook:

"Hey, I wanted to talk with you about [dck]'s food. I'm worried that he's not getting the variety that he needs while he's here, especially since he doesn't always want breakfast before he comes. If you'd rather talk about this on the phone, give me a call. I've really enjoyed watching [dck] this week; he is such a sweetheart!"

(The part about breakfast is what the mom herself told me this morning when I asked her what time he usually eats breakfast.)

My husband thought that I should give her an opportunity to do better, and not make the ultimatum yet, so this was the result. I'll let you know how this works out.

Reply

Thanks! I love this response. I, too, will never do the food from home again. It's only been 3 days, I wonder what mistake I'll learn from next week?
LOL!

Reply

Update!

Daycare mom responded to the private message, and said that they went shopping last night, and got him a variety of foods (she listed them). She apologized, and said that she had just not had a chance to get to the store earlier.

I'm happy that she didn't seem to take offense, and I hope that this will solve it. Thank you for all the comments.

Reply

I provide snacks and breakfast, parents provide lunch. Hand book states that lunch must healthy well balanced meal, easily prepared. (no handing me a bag of frozen food to cook but I will reheat leftovers)

Reply

Just because you previously offered the family to supply food it's still perfectly ok to change your mind.

What if they "need to go shopping" again and send crap for meals??

IMHO this is a disaster waiting to happen.

If it were me, I'd change my policy all around.

"Due to changes in my business structure, effective immediately, I will be supplying ALL food and drinks. Rates have changed accordingly and I will have a new contract to be signed immediately"

End of story.

Most providers here supply all food for this very reason. Most of us here have also agreed to something only to realize our mistake and have had to change policies.

That's the great thing about owning yur own business, you have the right to change your mind, on day 2 or two weeks or six months.

Reply

That's what I would do as well, but it sounds like you want to remain more flexible for the family (which may work for some!) In your case, if that is what you want to do, I'd put an addendum to your contract that states:
The weekly tuition is $X with all meals and snacks provided by the parent each day. Lunch must consist of... (example: a protein, fruit, vegetable, and starch component). Snack must include... If an appropriate meal is not provided, care will be refused until it is provided OR $5 can be paid at drop of.

Of course, use what would work for you, that was just an example But I would make sure to have it in writing what the current agreed upon rate is with them providing meals, each component they must bring each day, and especially the consequences of not bringing a healthy, appropriate meal and snacks. I would NOT allow them to ever drop of with the excuse they didn't/couldn't get to the store- either refuse drop off or allow them to pay (that is if you will always have food available for the child with no notice- for some that is possible, for others not... it's whatever is best for you!). A one-time exception easily turns into, "but we were able to do it before!" so I'd be firm with whatever your expectations are. Good luck, I hope they are a great family and a great fit for your program

Reply

Thanks! I do like this idea. If they ever drop off again with insufficient food, I think I will make this change. I'm hoping that it won't be a problem again since they now know that I'll call them on it.

Reply