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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>What do you think of this termination notice?
Pestle 09:00 AM 04-28-2017
The parents are polite, on time, and pay on time, too. The child shows up clean and with everything and only the things I want her to bring. Since both families I've terminated so far failed on all those counts, I feel cautious about terminating this one; I don't like the idea of ending an unpleasant situation and replacing it with another hellish one. They're friends of a friend, so this is awkward, but I guess in this business that happens all the time. Today, I caved and strapped this gigantic 10mo to my back in an Ergo, in the hopes this would satisfy her need for constant contact and maybe get her to sleep long enough to improve her mood. What I'm actually getting is the same nonstop top-of-the-lungs EEEE. EEEE. EEEE. EEEE. but six inches behind my ears, and now she can claw at me, too. The mother came by and put her down for a nap once; she covered her with a blanket after rocking her to sleep, and propped a heavy pillow against the crib mesh to create a more cave-like situation. I told the mother beforehand it was okay to come and put her down, but I can't allow unsafe napping in my day care so I don't see this being a solution unless she can get her to sleep without basically enshrouding her. How many of you have a parent come in to put a child this old to sleep?

Dear parents,

Pumpkin started care with me in mid-February. Unfortunately, Pumpkin is not settling in comfortably here. She struggles with falling asleep and staying asleep, and spends most of the day groggy and cranky. She feels the need for physical contact from me beyond what I can offer her while also caring for other children; setting her down or stepping away from her leads to long stretches of inconsolable crying. She particularly dislikes going outside and we often have to cut outdoor play short due to this, which isn't fair to the other kids. Since she has a healthy set of lungs, the other children also have difficulty napping and playing, and their mood is negatively affected.

Since she also has frequent runny green bowel movements, I wonder if a food sensitivity may be part of the problem. It's probably worth it to talk to a doctor about it.

Regardless, at this point I'm not anticipating that Pumpkin is going to adjust to my program. It may be that she'll be more comfortable with another care provider--maybe group care, where there's an assistant who could give her more individual attention.

You are paid through the end of the month and have a two-week deposit, so I'm happy to care for Pumpkin through XdateX. If she does start sleeping comfortably and seems calm and content by that time, we can re-evaluate keeping her in the program.
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Annalee 09:12 AM 04-28-2017
Originally Posted by Pestle:
The parents are polite, on time, and pay on time, too. The child shows up clean and with everything and only the things I want her to bring. Since both families I've terminated so far failed on all those counts, I feel cautious about terminating this one; I don't like the idea of ending an unpleasant situation and replacing it with another hellish one. They're friends of a friend, so this is awkward, but I guess in this business that happens all the time. Today, I caved and strapped this gigantic 10mo to my back in an Ergo, in the hopes this would satisfy her need for constant contact and maybe get her to sleep long enough to improve her mood. What I'm actually getting is the same nonstop top-of-the-lungs EEEE. EEEE. EEEE. EEEE. but six inches behind my ears, and now she can claw at me, too. The mother came by and put her down for a nap once; she covered her with a blanket after rocking her to sleep, and propped a heavy pillow against the crib mesh to create a more cave-like situation. I told the mother beforehand it was okay to come and put her down, but I can't allow unsafe napping in my day care so I don't see this being a solution unless she can get her to sleep without basically enshrouding her. How many of you have a parent come in to put a child this old to sleep?

Dear parents,

Pumpkin started care with me in mid-February. Unfortunately, Pumpkin is not settling in comfortably here. She struggles with falling asleep and staying asleep, and spends most of the day groggy and cranky. She feels the need for physical contact from me beyond what I can offer her while also caring for other children; setting her down or stepping away from her leads to long stretches of inconsolable crying. She particularly dislikes going outside and we often have to cut outdoor play short due to this, which isn't fair to the other kids. Since she has a healthy set of lungs, the other children also have difficulty napping and playing, and their mood is negatively affected.

Since she also has frequent runny green bowel movements, I wonder if a food sensitivity may be part of the problem. It's probably worth it to talk to a doctor about it.

Regardless, at this point I'm not anticipating that Pumpkin is going to adjust to my program. It may be that she'll be more comfortable with another care provider--maybe group care, where there's an assistant who could give her more individual attention.

You are paid through the end of the month and have a two-week deposit, so I'm happy to care for Pumpkin through XdateX. If she does start sleeping comfortably and seems calm and content by that time, we can re-evaluate keeping her in the program.
When I term, I do not use much explanation which can lead to negotiating in the clients mind. I keep it short and sweet "not a good fit, here's the website for providers". Sometimes, I give two week notice, sometimes I give no notice. Just depends on the client! Just my opinion!
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Pestle 09:18 AM 04-28-2017
I see what you're saying. Since this is stuff I've been bringing up with the parents all along, I probably just should give them notice, huh?
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daycarediva 09:19 AM 04-28-2017
Too many words. I assume since she's coming to the program to put the child down she is aware of the issues. I would just tell her

Dcp,

As you are aware pumpkin has struggled to adjust to group care, including rest time, outside time and floor play. I feel that at this time, my program is not a good fit for pumpkin and recommend a nanny or a program with more staff that can enable pumpkin to have 1:1 care.

The last day that I can provide care is X. You are paid up to that date, no further payments are due.

Provider
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Annalee 09:20 AM 04-28-2017
Originally Posted by Pestle:
I see what you're saying. Since this is stuff I've been bringing up with the parents all along, I probably just should give them notice, huh?
I would because they will know why but if you bring it up, they may try the "I will work harder on it and will you let me try stuff". When I am ready to terminate, I am done with the negotiating part!
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Pestle 09:28 AM 04-28-2017
True, true. If I want to try a last-ditch behavioral plan first, there's not really much hope in it, is there? 10mo, part-time, never been in care before 7mo, fusses at home for Dad, too--apparently only Mom gets to see the baby happy.
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Laurie 09:34 AM 04-28-2017
I would make it short and sweet!

Daycarediva's notice would be perfect.

Stay strong and don't allow the parents to negotiate anything. It's obvious you've worked with them for a while regarding all the issues. Plain and simple, it's not working out for you or the child.
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Blackcat31 09:39 AM 04-28-2017
Originally Posted by Pestle:
True, true. If I want to try a last-ditch behavioral plan first, there's not really much hope in it, is there? 10mo, part-time, never been in care before 7mo, fusses at home for Dad, too--apparently only Mom gets to see the baby happy.
Good intentions are good intentions but they rarely actually work out.

If behavior modification would have worked, it should have been done by now.... you said the parents are aware of all of this so at first indication of Pumpkin not adjusting to care, their immediate response should have been "What changes or things can we do at home to help her at your house?"

But they didn't so they aren't going to....kwim?

An initial effort is usually apparent but then they always fall back into the same "do what works for us" style of parenting.

It's not working. You know why and you are probably spot on in thinking that it's not going to.

I agree with Diva's letter....short, to the point and clear.
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Ariana 10:16 AM 04-28-2017
I know this is going to sound odd but I think sometimes parents are shocked at the lengths we sometimes go to for their kids! They are not willing to put in as much work as you are and things will not improve.

Short and sweet is always best. I find lengthy explanations have more of a potential to burn bridges and make parents angry. I always make it about me "I am unable to meet pumpkins needs at this time for some of the reasons we have discussed recently and I feel she deserves the very best care"
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AmyKidsCo 12:35 PM 04-28-2017
ITA that there are too many words.

Parents,

This note is to inform you that child care services provided to (child's name) by (business name) will be terminated, effective (date). I will continue to provide care through the end of this date. According to our contract you are required to pay tuition for your child through this date whether or not your child is brought to care.

I have appreciated the opportunity to care for your child.

(signature)


I would add any policies regarding termination at the bottom.
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