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CountryRoads 07:01 AM 06-03-2020
DS has his own toys that are visible when we're outside. I tell the dcbs that they can't play with those toys, but can play with anything that's in the fence.

One dcb cries whenever we're outside because he can't play with the toys and tattles to any parent that shows up that he can't play with them. Another dcm this morning told dcb to ask me if he can play with it - which I had to be the bad guy and say no, that those are ds toys and he would have to ask him.

I'm never going to make ds share his stuff with the daycare, but I feel like I look like I'm giving ds special treatment when I tell the kids no.

Thoughts?
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Blackcat31 07:15 AM 06-03-2020
Originally Posted by CountryRoads:
DS has his own toys that are visible when we're outside. I tell the dcbs that they can't play with those toys, but can play with anything that's in the fence.

One dcb cries whenever we're outside because he can't play with the toys and tattles to any parent that shows up that he can't play with them. Another dcm this morning told dcb to ask me if he can play with it - which I had to be the bad guy and say no, that those are ds toys and he would have to ask him.

I'm never going to make ds share his stuff with the daycare, but I feel like I look like I'm giving ds special treatment when I tell the kids no.

Thoughts?
Is your son allowed to play with those toys during daycare hours?


I would simply tell the DC parents and kids that "those are not daycare toys."
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CountryRoads 07:23 AM 06-03-2020
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Is your son allowed to play with those toys during daycare hours?


I would simply tell the DC parents and kids that "those are not daycare toys."
Thanks!

I like that response - short and sweet and no room for negotiation
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rosieteddy 07:24 AM 06-03-2020
My two sons were in my DC.They didnt play with their special toys during DC .
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AmyKidsCo 01:28 PM 06-03-2020
All six of my own children were in my childcare, and any toys they didn't want to share had to stay in their rooms.

For the outdoor toys, can you cover them with a tarp during the day so the other children can't see them?
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CountryRoads 01:37 PM 06-03-2020
Originally Posted by AmyKidsCo:
All six of my own children were in my childcare, and any toys they didn't want to share had to stay in their rooms.

For the outdoor toys, can you cover them with a tarp during the day so the other children can't see them?
DS likes to play with them during the day and I would feel horrible telling him he can't play with his own toys at his own house

But, I'm just going to have to explain to him that they need to be put in the garage during the day or he's gotta find a new place to use them where he is out of sight. They are too much of a distraction. Maybe I can make it seem like a exciting thing to find a new job site
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Ariana 01:45 PM 06-03-2020
You are giving your kid special treatment and there is nothing wrong with that. They have the choice to stay at home and give their kids special treatment as well but they don’t so I wouldn’t worry about judgment from them.

I agree with Blackcat, daycare toys and non daycare toys!
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rosieteddy 08:44 AM 06-04-2020
Is your son daycare age? If so why not get a few duplicates of the ones he wants to play with. Then he can have the choice to put some of his things in DC. I always went by the rule that if a friend came over then you would share your toys with them. If you did not want to share then the toys stayed in your room until the friend went home . DC kids were "friends". When my boys aged out It let them play away from us. Often they enjoyed helping the littles build and play. It let them enjoy ("little kid") toys longer.
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DaveA 11:28 AM 06-04-2020
DD & DS had their own stuff that they could share if they wanted to but otherwise was off limits to DCKs. For me letting my kids have something that wasn't "daycare" but "their toys" was a little thing that wasn't really little. They gave up a lot of time and space to other kids in their home.
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CountryRoads 12:54 PM 06-04-2020
Originally Posted by DaveA:
DD & DS had their own stuff that they could share if they wanted to but otherwise was off limits to DCKs. For me letting my kids have something that wasn't "daycare" but "their toys" was a little thing that wasn't really little. They gave up a lot of time and space to other kids in their home.
These are my thoughts as well.

I asked him if he would be willing to put his toys away during the day, but he doesn't want to. And I'm not going to force him to. Those are his toys and this is his house.

I took BC advice and told one dcb who was complaining yesterday that those are not daycare toys. I was able to find some of ds old toys and moved them in with the daycare toys. So far, so good! No mention of the other toys
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AmyKidsCo 01:05 PM 06-04-2020
Originally Posted by CountryRoads:
DS likes to play with them during the day and I would feel horrible telling him he can't play with his own toys at his own house
I get that. How old is he? I let my children play with things they didn't want to share in their rooms, or in a separate nearby room. (In this house it's the gated-off living room.)

Originally Posted by DaveA:
DD & DS had their own stuff that they could share if they wanted to but otherwise was off limits to DCKs. For me letting my kids have something that wasn't "daycare" but "their toys" was a little thing that wasn't really little. They gave up a lot of time and space to other kids in their home.
I did the same, except "off limits" things were also out of sight. I had the advantage of starting when our oldest was 7 so he could play in his room by himself or with his 3 yr old sister. If he'd been younger it would've been harder.
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Jupadia 10:58 AM 06-05-2020
My kids are 4 and 7. They have their own toys available in their rooms. The older one can go upstairs and play in his room at any time with them. The younger one has to wait to either is outside daycare hours or share the toy he brings down (or I run up and grab). I also let my boys play with a limited toy section of their own in our family's movie room that's next to the playroom. Kids might hear them, but cant see them play. In the past when the oldest was to young to separate I'd let him ay legos or other small toys in a play yard, but he have to let other bigger kids in to (most times it was only one kid with him). The daycare kids dont see their room toys, so no one asks for them.
The daycare / playroom toys are mine, or toys that I just made into mine / daycares like the mega blocks. I let my kids know we keep things like that downstairs or they would not gave room for it all, and it would be otherwise donated. I done the same with other toys they stoped playing with as much upstairs. Though now that they ate older and the daycare has lots of toys I have sent a few things away as they grow out of them.

Most of the outdoor toys are shareable with daycare. The ones that are not are tucked away in the yard so the daycare kids may spot them but dont have to look right at them. I just let them know that those are not daycare toys.
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