He Gets Short Term Disability But Won't Bring Kids Or Pay Me

[Winker]

Background: I watch two children from the same family. Father is a pilot. My schedules varies month to month (some weeks two day and some weeks three or four days) and if they take time off I do not get paid and if I take off I do not get paid. Typically they either have a grandparent visit and kerp kids home and take several vacation weeks in addition. I have no contract. This is the only time I have been a provider for any family.

The pilot father broke his wrist this week and now the mom has told me that he will be out of work the rest of this month and all of next month. We do have the agreement that if they give me the schedule each month, they are expected to pay me for those days no matter what. Mom has said that they will jot be paying me for the remaining days of tjis month that are on the schedule and will not bring them any days next month. I asked if she would consider giving me two days a week guaranteed for the next month since the father will get disability for his time off but mom said no because he wants to travel around during his time off and visit family and take the kids to water parks and activities while he is gone.

Not knowing when henwill go back to work exactly and really disappointed that they don't at least pay me for the agreed days this month not to mention that I feel it is not right to just casually have me sit and wait until they come back.
I need the money and do not want to burn any bridges, but I'm not sure what to do.

My fault for no contract but because this sort of fell into my lap (someone knew someone sort of situation) after a job loss from a place I worked many years at I just casually started in with this family.

I know anything goes and no one is obligated to anyone but I am sort of surprised that they are so casual about the whole thing especially since he will get partial pay.

[Rockgirl]

I’d replace them ASAP. And definitely put a contract in place going forward. Good luck!

[Josiegirl]

Is this the only family you have? I'd advertise for others and out the door they'd go. Are you a licensed dc or doing this just for a little extra money; either way you've got to protect yourself from instances like this. I'm angry at them for you. They're taking complete advantage of you and know they've got a good thing but not thinking of your situation at all. Don't just sit there, waiting for them to decide when they're coming back. Don't be available to their every whim. Even if you're not a licensed dc, you're probably still allowed a certain number of kids or families. Here we're allowed 2 families before we have to go through the state. And I bet there are families out there who are looking for dc.
But whatever you do, create a contract and have them sign it!!

[amberrose3dg]

Originally Posted by Winker

Background: I watch two children from the same family. Father is a pilot. My schedules varies month to month (some weeks two day and some weeks three or four days) and if they take time off I do not get paid and if I take off I do not get paid. Typically they either have a grandparent visit and kerp kids home and take several vacation weeks in addition. I have no contract. This is the only time I have been a provider for any family.

The pilot father broke his wrist this week and now the mom has told me that he will be out of work the rest of this month and all of next month. We do have the agreement that if they give me the schedule each month, they are expected to pay me for those days no matter what. Mom has said that they will jot be paying me for the remaining days of tjis month that are on the schedule and will not bring them any days next month. I asked if she would consider giving me two days a week guaranteed for the next month since the father will get disability for his time off but mom said no because he wants to travel around during his time off and visit family and take the kids to water parks and activities while he is gone.

Not knowing when henwill go back to work exactly and really disappointed that they don't at least pay me for the agreed days this month not to mention that I feel it is not right to just casually have me sit and wait until they come back.
I need the money and do not want to burn any bridges, but I'm not sure what to do.

My fault for no contract but because this sort of fell into my lap (someone knew someone sort of situation) after a job loss from a place I worked many years at I just casually started in with this family.

I know anything goes and no one is obligated to anyone but I am sort of surprised that they are so casual about the whole thing especially since he will get partial pay.

Replace them asap and let them be on their way.

[Cat Herder]

Time to get a business plan, contract and begin interviewing.

[mommyneedsadayoff]

Originally Posted by Winker

Background: I watch two children from the same family. Father is a pilot. My schedules varies month to month (some weeks two day and some weeks three or four days) and if they take time off I do not get paid and if I take off I do not get paid. Typically they either have a grandparent visit and kerp kids home and take several vacation weeks in addition. I have no contract. This is the only time I have been a provider for any family.

The pilot father broke his wrist this week and now the mom has told me that he will be out of work the rest of this month and all of next month. We do have the agreement that if they give me the schedule each month, they are expected to pay me for those days no matter what. Mom has said that they will jot be paying me for the remaining days of tjis month that are on the schedule and will not bring them any days next month. I asked if she would consider giving me two days a week guaranteed for the next month since the father will get disability for his time off but mom said no because he wants to travel around during his time off and visit family and take the kids to water parks and activities while he is gone.

Not knowing when henwill go back to work exactly and really disappointed that they don't at least pay me for the agreed days this month not to mention that I feel it is not right to just casually have me sit and wait until they come back.
I need the money and do not want to burn any bridges, but I'm not sure what to do.

My fault for no contract but because this sort of fell into my lap (someone knew someone sort of situation) after a job loss from a place I worked many years at I just casually started in with this family.

I know anything goes and no one is obligated to anyone but I am sort of surprised that they are so casual about the whole thing especially since he will get partial pay.

I'm surprised you still work with them at all. I wouldnt be able to afford such an unstable schedule unless I was paid a set rate each week whether they came or not. I dont think the parents find their behavior wrong bc it's the agreement they'd always had...they used you when they need you and now they dont need you, so they see nothing wrong with not paying.. You being available and acceptable with that is the only way to end this. Find a new family who needs you on a stable schedule and set a contract that includes set pay, regardless of attendance.

[amberrose3dg]

Originally Posted by mommyneedsadayoff

I'm surprised you still work with them at all. I wouldnt be able to afford such an unstable schedule unless I was paid a set rate each week whether they came or not. I dont think the parents find their behavior wrong bc it's the agreement they'd always had...they used you when they need you and now they dont need you, so they see nothing wrong with not paying.. You being available and acceptable with that is the only way to end this. Find a new family who needs you on a stable schedule and set a contract that includes set pay, regardless of attendance.

This ^
I will say one thing with no contract and no payment. You do not have to do anything else for them. Find yourself a family that will sign a contract and stick with it. Use this as a learning experience. You can probably find some children to care for while they are "out". When they contact you about coming back simply say you filled their spots as they did not want to pay you to keep them.

[DaveA]

Originally Posted by Cat Herder

Time to get a business plan, contract and begin interviewing.

This. The situation won't improve till you improve it.

[Snowmom]

Wow.

So they have the money to travel, go to waterparks and explore, but not to pay for 2 days a week to guarantee the care is there when they return.

I would tell them they no longer have care. Actually, I wouldn't even tell them. They had a verbal agreement with you to pay for what they scheduled in advance, they broke that verbal agreement, so to me, they have no claim to any future childcare.
They had a pretty good thing going on their end. No providers I know would give them the deal they had with you. Next time they contact you to resume, I'd tell them they no longer have care and you filled their spot. Nobody can live off broken promises.

And yes, written contract are your bff.

[knoxmomof2]

I have been doing this for 5.5 years now. I was working overnight as a caregiver for Seniors in their homes and homeschooling our 2 children during the day, but my Husband's work schedule became unpredictable so I couldn't continue working outside of the home. Like you, this kind of found me. I started with 1 child, unsure of how long it would last since people are flaky. After a time, I decided to add a second child, etc until I was at capacity with 4. (In my state, we can keep 4 without being licensed, which suits me fine.)

So, I started out with no clue about expecting payment in advance, policies, how to have a backbone and how to make my family's needs a priority, etc. As others have said before--every policy I now have is due to an experience I had. I laugh when I think that I used to think that expecting a weekly rate was unnecessary. In my eyes, everyone works full time, but that's not the case. They take a vacation day here and a personal day there - all paid for them - and I make nothing. I have 1 month left on the last of my first 4 kiddos. I have honored my rates and picked my battles on policy changes, etc with them because they were gracious enough to give me a chance when I had no experience, but I am enjoying the stability and respect I'm getting from my new families!!! So, consider this one of many expensive lessons you will learn if you decide to continue this.

Let them go without a fight, but also let them know that you can't guarantee their spaces will be available when Dad returns to work. Start advertising and fill those spots, but make sure you at least require payment in advance of care each week and have set hours--and be very clear during the interview that you expect their attention to these matters. Also, interview with the mindset that YOU are interviewing them just as much as they are interviewing you.

Good luck! This board is so much help, just read through the posts as you have time and you'll learn so much about what to do and what not to do!

[Mike]

Much good advice above. Even a verbal contract is a contract, and they broke it, so I would start a proper business and get real clients. They had it perfect and now they don't need you, so you find others and when they want to come back, it's up to you if you want to take them.

[Ariana]

Unfortunately (or fortunately!) you have fallen into a family that will teach you a lot about how to have a backbone and how to conduct a professional business going forward.

They are using you because they can, they aren’t paying you because they don’t have to. The only person that can change that is YOU! No one will volunteer giving you money, no matter how nice you are, no matter how flexible you are, no matter what. Most people do not want to pay so you have to make sure they do by having a good contract with a two week deposit etc.

Good luck, they won’t want to be told NO. They have a good thing going here with you, unfortunately it is not good for you and they just messed that up by being idiots.

[daycarediva]

Originally Posted by Snowmom

Wow.

So they have the money to travel, go to waterparks and explore, but not to pay for 2 days a week to guarantee the care is there when they return.

I would tell them they no longer have care. Actually, I wouldn't even tell them. They had a verbal agreement with you to pay for what they scheduled in advance, they broke that verbal agreement, so to me, they have no claim to any future childcare.
They had a pretty good thing going on their end. No providers I know would give them the deal they had with you. Next time they contact you to resume, I'd tell them they no longer have care and you filled their spot. Nobody can live off broken promises.

And yes, written contract are your bff.

agree here!

I would just say "Ok!" and be done. WHEN they contact you, I would tell them that unfortunately you could not hold their spaces for free, and you filled them with a paying family.

Get a contract, get payment in advance and use this as a lesson learned.