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Old 09-06-2015, 10:22 AM
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Default Lost 2 to the Fancy Preschool, Feeling Bitter

I know it's nothing new. I've lost kids in the past to the free preschools around here and I just shrug it off as some parents want care as cheaply as possible. This is a new scenario for me because the fancy preschool charges more than I do for basically the same thing. Biggest difference, that I can see, is there's more kids.

I feel like I've worked my booty off for these 2 kids to get them where they are, despite their parents, and then off they go.

like I said, I know it's nothing new. It happens all the time. I'm a home daycare so therefore I can't be nearly as good as a fancy preschool (sarcasm). I'm not saying the preschool is horrible, just that I offer the same thing for less and because it's a center it *must* be better. KWIM? I looked up their preschool curriculum and daily schedule and nothing jumped out at me as over and above. Pretty standard for any child care center-just labeled as preschool.

No concerns on my part if they end up wanting their spots back, I've already filled them (had them filled 2 months ago actually, a week after I was informed they'd be going to this preschool)

Just feeling bitter is all.
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Old 09-06-2015, 11:40 AM
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I can only imagine how you must feel. You devote months and/or years to molding, guiding, shaping these little beings into exploring, polite, intelligent boys and girls. You care for them every working day and you care ABOUT them too, then as soon as they turn 3 yo(or if you're really lucky you get to keep them until they're 4), they see the word preschool and they assume it's better. I wish parents would read some of the articles that are out there, indicating preschool isn't all it's cracked up to be; especially trying to fit a little round peg in with a whole group of 20+ square pegs. Why can't people let kids be kids?? God knows they have enough schooling as it is plus all the casual informal learning that goes on in a young child's life is soooo important. A 3 yo and even a 4 yo doesn't need an institution to be a smart, curious child. The bond kids form with others, outside of their parents, is so important for them to feel secure and loved. Obviously I don't know how many teachers and kids are in the prek they're going but I'm so old-fashioned. I'm guessing plenty. It becomes more difficult for those bonds to grow when there are tons of kids, teachers, staff, etc.

I'm talking about FT preschool above: Does anyone do a limited # of preschool hours anymore, say 10 hours? I had 3 kids of my own, the oldest started school in kindergarten. Academically he was fine, socially he just wanted me. So when my 2 dds were between 3-4 I started them 2 mornings, then 3 mornings a week at a preschool, it was perfect. They were learning all their skills here anyways but the social aspect worked wonders when it was time to start K. Do they even do that anymore, with all the universal prek stuff?

Maybe I'm too much from the old school.
I'm glad you have the spaces already filled. But yeh, it would both me too.
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Old 09-06-2015, 12:10 PM
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Both kids had been here for 2.5 years. One was woefully behind in language and social skills. This particular child hit all milestones in all areas including language and social development just 3 months ago. It was an uphill battle for sure and I cried tears of joy when I did this child's last assessment in June and was able to mark every developmental milestone as accomplished. Kind of feels like "Thanks for all your hard work, BYE!"

The other one was full of anger. Strong willed child to a T and with passive parents who were afraid of making him angry it was a test of patience every day. He knew if he screamed loud enough and long enough he could get whatever he wanted from his parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. Lots of Magda Gerber techniques, many books on strong willed children, bonding, a strong will and some ear plugs later and this kid is flourishing into a wonderful child who people want to be around. Again, "Thanks for all your hard work, BYE!"

I worry about both of them, more so the 2nd than the first. The first doesn't do well in large groups and there's 16 in his class. He has a tendency to shut down when there's too many people around. The 2nd has a tendency to do the opposite when he's over stimulated-there's 24 in his class.

Maybe it's a blessing in disguise. I know I will be less stressed and better able to care for the other kids here. I just feel like I'm not good enough (which is a common theme in every aspect of my life, as my therapist and I discovered.)
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Old 09-06-2015, 12:38 PM
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Because I know parents plan to eventually put their kids in a center based preschool, I purposefully enroll children 18 months to 4 years. I know the dcks need to be fully potty trained to enter preschool so I aim at 3 years old for my dcks to leave my program. I actually prefer younger children and once they reach 3 years I push them to enter a center based preschool because that is when I notice more of the problem behaviors start to come out. I also know that my environment is geared more for a younger age and the older dcks are more active and need more space and bigger play equipment. Every spring I do a re-registration to survey who will stay and who will be leaving so I can advertise to fill spaces early before the start of the new school year.
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Old 09-06-2015, 01:24 PM
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Yes, for some reason group centers are considered "school". Now I have owned and worked in group centers, but for me personally I just love high quality family child care!

I know there are wonderful group child cafe teachers here, so I don't want to step on any toes.

I just love cozy, smaller home centered care! That's just me. I provide the same or more than my area centers. I also feel home care is easier on me. Group care can be grueling on the provider! Family care is isolating for me. It's a trade off.

I feel your pain. I am one that would struggle with the kids leaving for "school" based in a center.. I know some here would roll with kids moving on-not me! I know it comes down to what parents feel is best. So what can you do? In my area parents come to me because they like the small center I operate. Areas of the country are different.

The big difference is all the kids are the same age in group care. Parents may feel since there are no babies/toddlers in the mix it's more "school" like.

{{{HUGS}}} to you!
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Old 09-06-2015, 01:28 PM
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Also, in my area there is all day, five day a week free public 4K. I totally understand why parents send their pre-k kids to public school. I love 3-5's! But I have to gear my program for 1 yr till they go to 4K. If kids were pulled at 3??? Grrrrrrr!
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