Does anyone have any tips on how to get an infant on a schedule?

I had an infant recently start my program who is 3 months old. He is still on demand fed at home, so eats 1-2oz every 1-2 hours here...and takes about 20-30 minutes to finish 1oz I feel like I am spending half of my day feeding him, a quarter of the day feeding the other infant, and a quarter of the day cleaning and picking up all the toys the older children have gotten out while I am feeding the babies. I'm feeling frustrated as I have very little time to teach and play with the 2 & 3 year olds who compose the rest of my crew. To add to things, he isn't on a set sleeping schedule either, and only takes 2 45-60min naps and that's been disruptive to the other children's nap schedules too. The other parents are starting to notice and aren't happy with the lack of sleep their children are getting or the lack of activities being sent home.

I did have a conversation with the infants mom on Friday about seeing if she could help getting him on a schedule...I guess we will see how this week goes...

Reply

30 minutes to finish 1 oz? no way. I would not do that. I would start right now stretching baby to go two hours between meals and then give less time to eat. 20 minutes and then put the bottle away. I would also make sure the nipple flow was right. They should be eating a lot faster by 3 months. the naps, yeah that is going to be iffy for awhile yet but you should be getting way more than two 45 minute naps

Reply

I did try stretching the feedings out last week, but that resulted in a lot of crying...which in turn got the other infant crying...then some of the older children crying

I wondered the nipple flow as well, so I widened the hole on a couple of them to see if that helped, but he still ate just as slow.

I'm thinking about just giving it one more week, I feel horrible saying that, as the parents are wonderful, but it's just hard to fit this little guy into our program. It's just not fair to the others.

Is that wrong of me? Have you ever termed an infant for not being on a schedule?

Reply

Breast milk baby?

Reply

No, he's formula.

Reply

The sleep thing, even I wouldn't expect a schedule just yet. Of course, if he's eating less often, more at a sitting, he'll probably sleep a little longer at a stretch, too.

The feeding things, though, seems like the nipple would help. I'm sure Nan has input on that.

How much does he weigh?

Reply

He could have suck-swallow issues, or he could have some other physical issue...have you asked the parents how he is with eating at home?

Reply

This is what I was thinking...he does eat the same way at home, and there are some other physical issues, but not really pertaining to eating...it could be a whole other issue though.

Reply

if you cant accommodate his needs, just let him go. Let mom know that you can see that he needs more attention than you can give and it is not fair to him to continue trying to put him in an environment that is not the right fit for him. I wouldnt say anything about the other baby or the parents or this baby, just take the blame, use the "its not the right fit" and let them move on. You know if this is going to work for you and it sounds like you already know what you want to do. It is okay to let a child go. better than everyone struggling on for months with a demanding baby.

Reply

Personally I don't think this is a "schedule" problem only. I know why Nan asked if this was a breast milk fed baby because my first instinct was to ask the same question and my first reaction was that this baby was breast fed at home and bottle fed at daycare. Are you absolutely sure that baby is being bottle fed at home? Have you seen mom give baby a bottle in front of you? I would ask mom to feed baby a bottle and see what happens.

Let mom prepare a bottle for you at daycare and watch what she does. Does she warm the bottle? For how long? How warm is the bottle? How is mom holding the baby? How is mom holding the bottle? If baby takes the bottle from mom no problem then the issue could be that mom does it one way and baby likes it that way.

If mom prepares the bottle and feeds it to baby but baby takes a long time for mom too ask if this is typical for baby to do at home. Does it take this long at home? If it does then you might just have a "grazer". Some babies/kids eat smaller portions all throughout the day. You will have to work with mom to try to extend the time between feedings but I would do it slowly. Also, is the baby easily distracted? If baby is the only child at home or if mom feeds the baby in a quiet room with no distractions and at daycare the baby stops feeding because of things going on then that could be another issue. My DS did this for a while, he always wanted to see what was going on so for this I would just stop feeding him and would put him down, he'd realize that the feeding was over and would protest most of the time so I'd pick him back up and try again. If he turned away again then I'd rinse and repeat until he didn't protest anymore. Doing this helped the feedings get shorter even though he still gets distracted (he's 11 months now).

IMO infants should be fed and napped on demand according to their natural sleeping and eating patterns but there are things that you could try to shift those patterns but they should be done slowly and respectfully. I think if you don't have that time then your decision to possibly let them go may be the better idea.

Reply

I have a baby here that is 100% formula fed from birth and she eats the same way. Takes forever. Will refuse. But then cries 10 minutes later to eat. It's hard. She's 7 months now so we're being stricter with a schedule, but at 3 months there wasn't much to do. If you feel you can't care for the baby and the other kids, then let the baby go. But I wouldn't assume the baby was breast fed at home if the mom says differently. Some kids just have a hard time eating or don't know what they want.

Reply