Not Sure What to Think - Peanut Allergy

[Tasha]

Last week I interviewed a nice couple who have a sweet 3-year-old girl, who I thought would fit in nicely with our group.
On Sunday, they came by to drop off the paperwork with plans to start a week from Monday. A couple of hours ago I received a text from the mom who said that her daughter was diagnosed with a peanut allergy this morning, and that she'll be emailing me later this evening a list of accommodations that will be needed for her care.
This may or may not be okay; I just don't know. I already have a daughter with Type 1 diabetes who requires a restricted diet, and it can be challenging at times. I have to be tenacious about her blood sugar levels, and now I'll need to be extra vigilant about another child's diet. I'll have to wait and see what accommodations need to be made before I decide whether I can do it or not, but at this point do I even have a choice? I've already accepted her into care and now I can't turn her away, can I? And the text was worded in such a way that she was going to tell me the accommodations, not ask me, and now I feel very nervous.

[mamamanda]

Make sure you find out what type of allergy it is. Some kids just can't eat peanuts while some can't even touch them. A lot of schools have gone to peanut free b/c peanut allergies are so common. It does feel overwhelming at first, but the diet can be managed pretty easily once you get the hang of it. Hang in there! Good luck!

[Leigh]

Were I in this situation, I would be honest with DCM, and tell her that I can not guarantee the safety of her child. My home is FAR from peanut free, and it's going to stay that way. I would encourage her to seek a situation that is able to keep her daughter safe. That said, there are different degrees of allergy-I am allergic to peanuts, too. I'm allergic to most everything (fish, beef, corn, strawberries, chicken, dairy, PEANUTS). I eat most of the things that I am allergic to, including peanuts-the only allergy that is dangerous for me is the strawberry one. The others can cause some discomfort, but only one is hazardous for me.

[bklsmum]

Is it just me that finds it weird that they just diagnosed this?

[LysesKids]

Originally Posted by bklsmum

Is it just me that finds it weird that they just diagnosed this?

I agree... normally kids get into peanut butter & such before 3 years; heck, I have 1 year olds eating it. If there was an allergy that was that bad I think they would already know. Believe me, most my babies that have allergy issues start showing signs by 12 months ( inc chemicals/scents which is one of my issues); BTW, I also have 3 allergies that are life threatening... 2 are food that I can NEVER EAT in any form much less touch ( needless to say I do not serve them in my childcare home )

[MyAngels]

Originally Posted by bklsmum

Is it just me that finds it weird that they just diagnosed this?

That's what I thought, too. I'd say she disclosed the allergy at other interviews and was turned down for care. I'd reply to the text: "Thank you for letting me know. Forward the list to me and I will determine if I will be able to provide child care services at that time."

I did have a child with a peanut allergy once and while it was a PITA at times it wasn't difficult. I was glad when he aged out though.

[Baby Beluga]

Originally Posted by MyAngels

That's what I thought, too. I'd say she disclosed the allergy at other interviews and was turned down for care. I'd reply to the text: "Thank you for letting me know. Forward the list to me and I will determine if I will be able to provide child care services at that time."

[mommyneedsadayoff]

I would ask for a doctor's note stating when the allergy was diagnosed (I would think this is possible) and say exactly as the previous poster stated. "Once I have a doctor's note and the necessary accommodations, I will be let you know if I am able to provide care."

I think it is is fishy that at 3, she is just being diagnosed, conveniently after being accepted into your care. That is just me being a skeptic, but I would not et her start setting the terms before she has even started attending daycare. I do not do well with the whole "this is what you will need to do". A better way would have been to let you of the allergy and the accommodation needed and asking if you will still be able to provide care, not expecting it.

[Tasha]

Originally Posted by bklsmum

Is it just me that finds it weird that they just diagnosed this?

And this is the million dollar question, and I was hoping someone would bring it up. I really know nothing about allergies, but it does seem odd to me. The timing seems a little too pat...
Ugh. I have a sick feeling about this one.

[Controlled Chaos]

Allergies can increase in severity as a child ages sometimes. My nephew wasn't diagnosed until 3rd grade.

[Tasha]

Originally Posted by Controlled Chaos

Allergies can increase in severity as a child ages sometimes. My nephew wasn't diagnosed until 3rd grade.

How did your nephew get diagnosed? Did he have a reaction and then get tested on the same day?

[Sunchimes]

I had one too. She wasn't at a life-threatening level, but it caused skin issues that required doctor/ER visits. It was a royal pain. It isn't just a matter of avoiding peanut butter either. Peanuts are in things you would never think about. Even worse are the things that don't contain peanuts but were made with equipment that may have processed peanuts. I spent a lot of time in the grocery aisle squinting at the small print on food labels.

That said, it was do-able at her level. If her reactions had been worse, I probably wouldn't have taken her. In the year she was here, she never had a reaction from daycare. She had 2 ER visits from things she got at home. I eat 2 kinds of sandwiches-peanut butter and tuna. It was a long, long year for me.

Are allergies covered by ADA?

[Tasha]

Originally Posted by Sunchimes

I had one too. She wasn't at a life-threatening level, but it caused skin issues that required doctor/ER visits. It was a royal pain. It isn't just a matter of avoiding peanut butter either. Peanuts are in things you would never think about. Even worse are the things that don't contain peanuts but were made with equipment that may have processed peanuts. I spent a lot of time in the grocery aisle squinting at the small print on food labels.

That said, it was do-able at her level. If her reactions had been worse, I probably wouldn't have taken her. In the year she was here, she never had a reaction from daycare. She had 2 ER visits from things she got at home. I eat 2 kinds of sandwiches-peanut butter and tuna. It was a long, long year for me.

Are allergies covered by ADA?

I just got an email from DCM that said the main issue was that I won't
be able to serve anything with peanuts or any store-bought
items that have a ''may contain'' label because the doctor said she was ''severely allergic.'' Plus she wants to make sure
that the daycare kids wash their hands and their faces when they arrive
in the mornings. She said she would call me tomorrow to discuss this
at length. I'm not sure exactly how I am going to respond but I know
I need to be very careful.

[mommyneedsadayoff]

Originally Posted by Tasha

I just got an email from DCM that said the main issue was that I won't
be able to serve anything with peanuts or any store-bought
items that have a ''may contain'' label because the doctor said she was ''severely allergic.'' Plus she wants to make sure
that the daycare kids wash their hands and their faces when they arrive
in the mornings. She said she would call me tomorrow to discuss this
at length. I'm not sure exactly how I am going to respond but I know
I need to be very careful.

I think you need to decide if you would like to take this child on and make the accommodations or not. If you do, then a doctor's note, and medical history form should be filled out and I would really consider asking mom point blank when the allergy was discovered. You said you interviewed her last week, she dropped papers on sunday, and then texted you a few hours later about the allergy, so either she knew about the allergy beforehand and did not tell you, or they found out just a few days after your interview (again, hate to be a skeptic, but I doubt it was that coincidental). The doctor should be able to give you a date of when the allergy was discovered or noted on the medical records. If mom knew prior to your interview, I would not take them and tell them they were not honest and therefore you cannot work with them. That is legal, as you are not taking the child because of dishonesty, not the nut allergy.

If you don't want to take the child on, then do not blame the nut allergy, and just tell them, due to schedule changes (or whatever), you can no longer accept them. Refund any money and move on. Do not bring up the allergy.

This is just my opinion having read quite a bit about nut allergies recently. They are (kind of) covered under the ADA, but just as with any disability, both the parent and provider must make reasonable accommodations. I may get a lot of heat for this, but in my home, cutting out peanuts/PB/anything containing or made around peanuts would be very hard to do ad I could not knowingly take the risk of having a child here with such a severe allergy if I cannot keep my home entirely peanut free. Just think if you have 8-10 kids arriving each day and you have to make sure their hands are peanut free, that they don't have their leftover PB & J sandwich on their shirt, ect...it would be too scary for me. I do not know your town, but many daycare centers are already nut free, so it would probably be safer for her cild to attend one of them than to make you alter your whole program and hope you don't make a mistake. Hope this helps and I am sure more experienced providers who have dealt with this can give you good advice. As long as you don't blame the nut allergy for not watching her, then the burden of proof is on them if they want to pursue legal action from what I have read.

[Silly Songs]

I was going to suggest a center too . However , one time at lunch I had a dish w peanut sauce ( out at a restaurant ) and I had to wash my hands and change my shirt before I went back into the class .I did that on my own .There is no 100 percent guarantee that the children or teachers in the centers don't have any pb on their hands when they arrive . If my child had a severe allergy that could affect their health, I would hire a nanny.

[Baby Beluga]

Out of curiosity, I have a clause in my handbook that states that I am not an allergy free environment - could this come back to bite me? Should I eliminate it? It doesn't state that I won't accept children with allergies just that I am not an allergy free home and any child who has allergies will need to provide their own food as well doctor documentation stating what the allergies are, when they were diagnosed, what symptoms to watch out for and what steps need to be taken if they become exposed to an allergen.

Pardon me for not being PC - but how in the world would someone expect a provider who works out of their home to become peanut free? That seems a bit excessive to me.

[childcaremom]

Originally Posted by mommyneedsadayoff

I think you need to decide if you would like to take this child on and make the accommodations or not. If you do, then a doctor's note, and medical history form should be filled out and I would really consider asking mom point blank when the allergy was discovered. You said you interviewed her last week, she dropped papers on sunday, and then texted you a few hours later about the allergy, so either she knew about the allergy beforehand and did not tell you, or they found out just a few days after your interview (again, hate to be a skeptic, but I doubt it was that coincidental). The doctor should be able to give you a date of when the allergy was discovered or noted on the medical records. If mom knew prior to your interview, I would not take them and tell them they were not honest and therefore you cannot work with them. That is legal, as you are not taking the child because of dishonesty, not the nut allergy.

If you don't want to take the child on, then do not blame the nut allergy, and just tell them, due to schedule changes (or whatever), you can no longer accept them. Refund any money and move on. Do not bring up the allergy.

This is just my opinion having read quite a bit about nut allergies recently. They are (kind of) covered under the ADA, but just as with any disability, both the parent and provider must make reasonable accommodations. I may get a lot of heat for this, but in my home, cutting out peanuts/PB/anything containing or made around peanuts would be very hard to do ad I could not knowingly take the risk of having a child here with such a severe allergy if I cannot keep my home entirely peanut free. Just think if you have 8-10 kids arriving each day and you have to make sure their hands are peanut free, that they don't have their leftover PB & J sandwich on their shirt, ect...it would be too scary for me. I do not know your town, but many daycare centers are already nut free, so it would probably be safer for her cild to attend one of them than to make you alter your whole program and hope you don't make a mistake. Hope this helps and I am sure more experienced providers who have dealt with this can give you good advice. As long as you don't blame the nut allergy for not watching her, then the burden of proof is on them if they want to pursue legal action from what I have read.

I remember a similar discussion on here when I termed a child with a suspected nut allergy. I am in Canada and legally unlicensed so NOT bound by any rules or regs concerning this.

I am celiac and eat lots of nuts, nut flours, etc so could not provide a safe environment and was not going to change my diet to accommodate a child's allergy. I was very honest with family and told them that I would not be able to provide a safe environment for their little one. They were understanding.

However, I think the gist of the convo was the there are rules pertaining to this so I think the above advice is best. So if you plan to discontinue the relationship, do not mention the allergy at all.

The age doesn't seem suspicious as I know many families whose children were diagnosed later as being allergic, however the timing of her disclosure seems highly suspect.

If you think you would go ahead, I would ask for the documentation, including the date of diagnosis, and as someone suggested, if it was earlier than her disclosure, I would term for dishonesty.

Imho, this dcm doesn't sound like someone I could build a trusting relationship with at all and I would be hesitant to continue on.

[LysesKids]

Originally Posted by childcaremom

I remember a similar discussion on here when I termed a child with a suspected nut allergy. I am in Canada and legally unlicensed so NOT bound by any rules or regs concerning this.

I am celiac and eat lots of nuts, nut flours, etc so could not provide a safe environment and was not going to change my diet to accommodate a child's allergy. I was very honest with family and told them that I would not be able to provide a safe environment for their little one. They were understanding.

However, I think the gist of the convo was the there are rules pertaining to this so I think the above advice is best. So if you plan to discontinue the relationship, do not mention the allergy at all.

The age doesn't seem suspicious as I know many families whose children were diagnosed later as being allergic, however the timing of her disclosure seems highly suspect.

If you think you would go ahead, I would ask for the documentation, including the date of diagnosis, and as someone suggested, if it was earlier than her disclosure, I would term for dishonesty.

Imho, this dcm doesn't sound like someone I could build a trusting relationship with at all and I would be hesitant to continue on.

I do a lot of nut flours too because I have a Celiac child in care... I cannot guarantee an allergy free environment either

[laundrymom]

Originally Posted by Tasha

I just got an email from DCM that said the main issue was that I won't
be able to serve anything with peanuts or any store-bought
items that have a ''may contain'' label because the doctor said she was ''severely allergic.'' Plus she wants to make sure
that the daycare kids wash their hands and their faces when they arrive
in the mornings. She said she would call me tomorrow to discuss this
at length. I'm not sure exactly how I am going to respond but I know
I need to be very careful.

I would just tell her that you can't guarantee a nut free program and release her from her contract.

Dear mom,
Because your daughter is unable to fully participate in my program due to her recently diagnosed allergy, I am releasing you from our contract.
Thank you.

(It's no ones fault and I'm sure had she not been diagnosed she would have flourished in your place. Just let her out of her contract.) why would this be an issue legally? It's not discrimination. It's safety. Serious question.

[Thriftylady]

For me it would be a no go if it was severe. There is no way I am taking peanut butter away from DH and DD, it has been a favorite of theirs for years. Their whole lives really. I do have a blurb in my contract "flour, eggs, milk, and peanut butter are served in the daycare home". Now I wonder if that is legal?

[Blackcat31]

Originally Posted by Tasha

Last week I interviewed a nice couple who have a sweet 3-year-old girl, who I thought would fit in nicely with our group.
On Sunday, they came by to drop off the paperwork with plans to start a week from Monday. A couple of hours ago I received a text from the mom who said that her daughter was diagnosed with a peanut allergy this morning, and that she'll be emailing me later this evening a list of accommodations that will be needed for her care.
This may or may not be okay; I just don't know. I already have a daughter with Type 1 diabetes who requires a restricted diet, and it can be challenging at times. I have to be tenacious about her blood sugar levels, and now I'll need to be extra vigilant about another child's diet. I'll have to wait and see what accommodations need to be made before I decide whether I can do it or not, but at this point do I even have a choice? I've already accepted her into care and now I can't turn her away, can I? And the text was worded in such a way that she was going to tell me the accommodations, not ask me, and now I feel very nervous.

I would not be able to accommodate a child with a nut allergy. My DH is Type 1 diabetic and uses peanut M&M's as a way to raise his blood sugar when he goes low. My nephew (also a Type 1) uses them. I am very up front and open about that during interviews so that people know I am unable to accommodate a child with a nut allergy.

Also, I too am suspicious of the "sudden" diagnosis. It sounds like the mom didn't say anything at first but choose to after the fact because she knows that allergies are protected under the ADA.

[cheerfuldom]

I wouldnt take her. I would just say that you cannot offer a peanut free environment and you think it would be best for her to find a facility that offers this. At your own home, you would have to follow these guidelines even on the weekends so that there are no crumbs around the house or dropped items that her child might find and put her in mouth. This will be impossible unless your daycare setup and daycare kitchen area or completely separate. Plus there is liability you would have in accepted a child and risking a reaction under your watch.

[Blackcat31]

Here is a great thread about peanut allergies

http://www.daycare.com/forum/showthr...Peanut+allergy

It's one of the first questions I ask in the phone interview, because that's something I can't accommodate nor will I assume that liability.

Years ago my kids school tried to make the parents sign a "peanut agreement" which many if not most refused. Finally they made a peanut free table in the lunch room.

The parent can't expect everyone to change their environment for one child, the real world doesn't work that way, so if you find out it's more on the severe side you could suggest a nanny.

[Blackcat31]

Originally Posted by Unregistered

It's one of the first questions I ask in the phone interview, because that's something I can't accommodate nor will I assume that liability.

Years ago my kids school tried to make the parents sign a "peanut agreement" which many if not most refused. Finally they made a peanut free table in the lunch room.

The parent can't expect everyone to change their environment for one child, the real world doesn't work that way, so if you find out it's more on the severe side you could suggest a nanny.

I disagree. Seems that is exactly what is happening lately.

Many schools no longer just have peanut tables but are 100% peanut free.
A small percentage of people (adults and children) have food/peanut allergies and although I sympathize since it can be life threatening and very dangerous, not to mention just plain old scary when it's your child but I've seen many schools, facilities and programs change their rules to accommodate that small percentage of kids so I do think the real world works that way. Or is leaning that way...

I agree, there are options offered everywhere now, but they couldn't dictate that the parents not pack peanut butter sandwiches, cookies that contained peanuts, etc. so the peanut free table was the best compromise.

[Tasha]

I barely slept last night because I am so concerned about handling this correctly. What worries me the most was the attitude of her email; it did not read as though it were a request. It was just, here's what you have to do. I know when my daughter was diagnosed with diabetes I was very panicked, so I am willing to cut her a break because I am sure she is reeling. But the timing of this is very suspicious to me. And now I dread her phone call.

[Blackcat31]

Originally Posted by Tasha

I barely slept last night because I am so concerned about handling this correctly. What worries me the most was the attitude of her email; it did not read as though it were a request. It was just, here's what you have to do. I know when my daughter was diagnosed with diabetes I was very panicked, so I am willing to cut her a break because I am sure she is reeling. But the timing of this is very suspicious to me. And now I dread her phone call.

That's because she knows you can't deny her care due to the allergy.

If you decide not to take her, use ANY other reason to decline just not the peanut allergy.

Unless you have menus or other things stating you serve peanuts...then you could possibly use that as a reason.

[nannyde]

I would notify her that you have a child in your home that has Physician ordered nut products for a disability.

You will have nut products on site at all times.

She will most likely question you as to what and why... tell her you can't give any info other than you must follow the Doctors order for this child.

Get a note from your diabetes doc stating nut products are to used to manage your kids diabetes.

[mommyneedsadayoff]

Originally Posted by Tasha

I barely slept last night because I am so concerned about handling this correctly. What worries me the most was the attitude of her email; it did not read as though it were a request. It was just, here's what you have to do. I know when my daughter was diagnosed with diabetes I was very panicked, so I am willing to cut her a break because I am sure she is reeling. But the timing of this is very suspicious to me. And now I dread her phone call.

That is so rude of her. The way you describe her attitude or tone in the email says this was not new to her. She waited to be accepted and then gave you this VERY IMPORTANT information. I know it is possible she didn't know, but I highly doubt it! I would ask her point blank, "when were you aware of this allergy? When did you go to the doctor and confirm it?" And if you don't want to take on the child, then do as Nannyde suggested and say you have children who require nut products so you will not be able to provide a nut free environment or make up something else.

I just want to add that it really bugs me when people do not ask, but expect or demand that I do something. This is my home and it is VERY disrespectful, regardless of the situtation. That alone is a huge red flag for me. What other demands will she make in the future if she is willing to start now and she hasn't even started daycare?

[Thriftylady]

When she calls, tell her before you discuss it further, you need documentation from the doctor stating exactly what the allergy is, when it was diagnosed, and how it should be handled in the daycare setting. Likely it was past diagnosis, and you can refuse for dishonesty. I don't like the feel I am getting as you tell us how this is playing out.

[nannyde]

Time to start laying out a platter of peanut butter cookies at EVERY interview.

That will end the interview real quick like.

[Rockgirl]

Originally Posted by nannyde

Time to start laying out a platter of peanut butter cookies at EVERY interview.

That will end the interview real quick like.

Perfect!

[Crazy8]

I have written in my contract that my home is NOT peanut free. My kids bring their own lunch and there is no way I would restrict them all from peanut products so therefore I feel I could not provide a safe environment for their child. If they still wanted to keep their child here after that they'd be insane.

I would love to know for sure when this diagnosis came about too, I'd bet money that it didn't happen this week!

Originally Posted by Tasha

I barely slept last night because I am so concerned about handling this correctly. What worries me the most was the attitude of her email; it did not read as though it were a request. It was just, here's what you have to do. I know when my daughter was diagnosed with diabetes I was very panicked, so I am willing to cut her a break because I am sure she is reeling. But the timing of this is very suspicious to me. And now I dread her phone call.

I would call her, not wait for her to call, and don't put it in email. Best to let her know right away so she can try and find someone. I would tell her you can't accommodate that, and wish her luck. Give her back any fees if she paid, and basically non disclosure invalidates the contract. (I don't believe he was just diagnosed).

If you are afraid of a legal issue, then by all means come up with a good one not related to the peanut allergy.

[Tasha]

Originally Posted by Unregistered

I would call her, not wait for her to call, and don't put it in email. Best to let her know right away so she can try and find someone. I would tell her you can't accommodate that, and wish her luck. Give her back any fees if she paid, and basically non disclosure invalidates the contract. (I don't believe he was just diagnosed).

If you are afraid of a legal issue, then by all means come up with a good one not related to the peanut allergy.

That's the thing, I am very much afraid of it being a legal issue.

[Blackcat31]

Originally Posted by Tasha

That's the thing, I am very much afraid of it being a legal issue.

Her childs medical needs do not outweigh your child's medical needs.

I would simply tell her you can't accommodate her as you already have a child in care with medical needs that directly go against her daughter's needs.

You don't have to tell her it's your child. Do what NannyDe said and say the child already there that needs to have access to peanuts and peanut products outweighs your obligation to accept her child.

The ADA only requires you to make "reasonable accommodations" and you are unable to do that. It's in the link I posted previously.

[Thriftylady]

Originally Posted by Tasha

That's the thing, I am very much afraid of it being a legal issue.

That is why you ask for the diagnosis and a date on it. If she withheld the information, you can then terminate the contract based on dishonesty. Just be sure the doctors note MUST list the date of diagnosis.

[AmyKidsCo]

Originally Posted by nannyde

I would notify her that you have a child in your home that has Physician ordered nut products for a disability.

You will have nut products on site at all times.

She will most likely question you as to what and why... tell her you can't give any info other than you must follow the Doctors order for this child.

Get a note from your diabetes doc stating nut products are to used to manage your kids diabetes.

I wouldn't blatantly lie to a parent - not only is it unprofessional and unethical, there's too big a chance it could blow up in your face.

Originally Posted by Blackcat31

That's because she knows you can't deny her care due to the allergy.

If you decide not to take her, use ANY other reason to decline just not the peanut allergy.

Unless you have menus or other things stating you serve peanuts...then you could possibly use that as a reason.

ITA. Tell the mom that the child is not a good fit for your program after all. Don't give a reason beyond "not a good fit." And since you're not willing to accommodate her peanut allergy she isn't a good fit, so it's true.

[nannyde]

Originally Posted by Thriftylady

That is why you ask for the diagnosis and a date on it. If she withheld the information, you can then terminate the contract based on dishonesty. Just be sure the doctors note MUST list the date of diagnosis.

No this isn't true. The parent is not obligated to disclose special needs. The child can have AIDS and they don't have to divulge.

She just needs to let her know she has a child already enrolled who is required to have peanut products and products produced in peanut facilities on site. There will be both on the child and in the home.

[NeedaVaca]

The thing is the OP said her child is diabetic and peanut butter can help control blood sugar levels, maybe it wouldn't be lying? It depends on if this is something the OP uses for her DD.

[Thriftylady]

Originally Posted by NeedaVaca

The thing is the OP said her child is diabetic and peanut butter can help control blood sugar levels, maybe it wouldn't be lying? It depends on if this is something the OP uses for her DD.

Well I know with my diabetes I use it sometimes. I am not sure if a doctor would write that up though?

Originally Posted by Tasha

That's the thing, I am very much afraid of it being a legal issue.

Understand, then I would say something akin to not a good fit, it won't work out.

We're probably over thinking all of it, but best to try and not stress.. get it over with.

Let us know how it goes, I'm very curious because in all the years in daycare I've never come across this scenario. (knock on wood)

[nannyde]

Originally Posted by AmyKidsCo

I wouldn't blatantly lie to a parent - not only is it unprofessional and unethical, there's too big a chance it could blow up in your face.



ITA. Tell the mom that the child is not a good fit for your program after all. Don't give a reason beyond "not a good fit." And since you're not willing to accommodate her peanut allergy she isn't a good fit, so it's true.

It's not lying. She has a kid who uses peanut products and products made in a peanut facility to regulate her blood sugar. Very common in diabetes.

Special needs meet special needs

[Tasha]

Originally Posted by nannyde

It's not lying. She has a kid who uses peanut products and products made in a peanut facility to regulate her blood sugar. Very common in diabetes.

Special needs meet special needs

It's not lying. Blackcat says her DH eats Peanut M&Ms to elevate his blood sugar; my daughter eats miniature peanut butter cups. We also eat a lot
of peanut butter. And I do a lot of Asian-style cooking with peanut oil. Truly,
it would be a huge lifestyle change, and it definitely wouldn't be fair to DD.
When she calls I'm just going to appeal to her as a reasonable human being and tell her that what she is demanding is not something that I can do and hope that she is rational about it.

[Blackcat31]

Originally Posted by Tasha

It's not lying. Blackcat says her DH eats Peanut M&Ms to elevate his blood sugar; my daughter eats miniature peanut butter cups. We also eat a lot
of peanut butter. And I do a lot of Asian-style cooking with peanut oil. Truly,
it would be a huge lifestyle change, and it definitely wouldn't be fair to DD.
When she calls I'm just going to appeal to her as a reasonable human being and tell her that what she is demanding is not something that I can do and hope that she is rational about it.

His Dr put it in writing. (bet your DD's doctor would be willing to as well)

The chocolate helps bring it up quickly and the peanuts help it remain stable.
Peanut M&M's don't melt like Snickers bars so they are easy to grab and bring with us. He will eat a Snickers too (chocolate and peanuts too) but they melt in the summer.

[nannyde]

Originally Posted by Tasha

It's not lying. Blackcat says her DH eats Peanut M&Ms to elevate his blood sugar; my daughter eats miniature peanut butter cups. We also eat a lot
of peanut butter. And I do a lot of Asian-style cooking with peanut oil. Truly,
it would be a huge lifestyle change, and it definitely wouldn't be fair to DD.
When she calls I'm just going to appeal to her as a reasonable human being and tell her that what she is demanding is not something that I can do and hope that she is rational about it.

Don't appeal... just TELL her.

No fuss
No muss
She has a child with a special need. She will understand that the child who needs to have access to peanuts must have her needs met. Tell her you have had the child from birth and you can not terminate as the child is protected under the disability act

She hasn't technically started yet. Call mom right away and tell her that you are no longer going to be able to provide care for this child. Tell her its a safety issue in that her child can not be around peanut products and as this is your home as well as business. Your family enjoys many peanut products including in the daycare area and you can not quarantee there isn't a transfer of nut product to the child and as a result you are terminating the contract for her childs health and safety. You can also not guarantee any parent doesn't bring a peanut product into the center on their hands or person at drop off or pick up. Return any payment immediately. Wish her good luck perhaps also suggest with this new information she has discovered that perhaps hiring a nanny to watch the child in the safety of her own home would be more beneficial.

[mommyneedsadayoff]

Originally Posted by Tasha

It's not lying. Blackcat says her DH eats Peanut M&Ms to elevate his blood sugar; my daughter eats miniature peanut butter cups. We also eat a lot
of peanut butter. And I do a lot of Asian-style cooking with peanut oil. Truly,
it would be a huge lifestyle change, and it definitely wouldn't be fair to DD.
When she calls I'm just going to appeal to her as a reasonable human being and tell her that what she is demanding is not something that I can do and hope that she is rational about it.

I am so curious to hear how the phone call goes! I know some say to call, but since she texted and emailed you about the allergy, maybe you could just shoot her an email and save yourself the headache? Something like "I am so sorry to hear of LO's allergy! I totally understand you need for a peanut free environment, but I will not be able to accommodate that as I have a child who has been with me since birth and has a medical need for peanut products, per her doctor's orders and I will not be able to provide a nut free environment. There are centers who may be better able to accommodate LO's allergy. Thank you so much for your interest and best of luck in your childcare search!" If you have received a deposit, just let her know you will tear it up or send it back to her or whatever and then leave it at that.

[Tasha]

I emailed her and simply said that I cannot reasonably handle the accommodations she requires because peanuts are a necessary and integral part of a diet of a child in my care who also has special needs. I also told her that I would return her deposit by mail. I wrote it with a nice tone, and now I'm just hoping she'll accept it and not contact me. Honestly, the last 24 hours have been unbelievably nerve-wracking to me, and I don't even think I've done anything wrong.

[nannyde]

Originally Posted by mommyneedsadayoff

I am so curious to hear how the phone call goes! I know some say to call, but since she texted and emailed you about the allergy, maybe you could just shoot her an email and save yourself the headache? Something like "I am so sorry to hear of LO's allergy! I totally understand you need for a peanut free environment, but I will not be able to accommodate that as I have a child who has been with me since birth and has a medical need for peanut products, per her doctor's orders and I will not be able to provide a nut free environment. There are centers who may be better able to accommodate LO's allergy. Thank you so much for your interest and best of luck in your childcare search!" If you have received a deposit, just let her know you will tear it up or send it back to her or whatever and then leave it at that.

This but don't use "her" or him

[Tasha]

"I am very disappointed and distressed about your decision and I will call you
later tonight to discuss further.''

[MyAngels]

Originally Posted by Tasha

I emailed her and simply said that I cannot reasonably handle the accommodations she requires because peanuts are a necessary and integral part of a diet of a child in my care who also has special needs. I also told her that I would return her deposit by mail. I wrote it with a nice tone, and now I'm just hoping she'll accept it and not contact me. Honestly, the last 24 hours have been unbelievably nerve-wracking to me, and I don't even think I've done anything wrong.

Good for you! I'm sure she'll be reasonable (fingers crossed). Let us know how it ends up

[Tasha]

Originally Posted by MyAngels

Good for you! I'm sure she'll be reasonable (fingers crossed). Let us know how it ends up

See post above. I don't think she's in a reasonable frame of mind, and now
this thing will just continue.

[Rockgirl]

Originally Posted by Tasha

"I am very disappointed and distressed about your decision and I will call you
later tonight to discuss further.''

Not sure what she thinks there is to discuss. Don't let her bully you!

[nannyde]

Originally Posted by Tasha

"I am very disappointed and distressed about your decision and I will call you
later tonight to discuss further.''

I won't be available to discuss this tonight as I am conducting interviews for the slot. I am not at liberty to discuss this further as I am obligated to maintain confidentiality for the special needs child in my care. The child qualifies under the Disability Act which requires I keep all medical information confidential including treatments the child is currently receiving. As the parent of a special needs child who qualifies under the Disability Act I am certain you understand.

The good news is that we just met a couple of days ago and had only one interview. I am SO thankful we didn't have peanut products out and on our person during the interview. It could have been a devastating outcome since you were unaware of your child's allergy at that time. We can all be grateful nothing happened to your precious child.

I would encourage you to notify any prospective provider BEFORE the interview as peanut products are a highly used source of nutrition in nearly every daycare. With your daughter's severe allergy, she could come upon it by simply entering the home.

Good luck in your search.

[Thriftylady]

Originally Posted by nannyde

i won't be available to discuss this tonight as i am conducting interviews for the slot. I am not at liberty to discuss this further as i am obligated to maintain confidentiality for the special needs child in my care. The child qualifies under the disability act which requires i keep all medical information confidential including treatments the child is currently receiving. As the parent of a special needs child who qualifies under the disability act i am certain you understand.

The good news is that we just met a couple of days ago and had only one interview. I am so thankful we didn't have peanut products out and on our person during the interview. It could have been a devastating outcome since you were unaware of your child's allergy at that time. We can all be grateful nothing happened to your precious child.

I would encourage you to notify any prospective provider before the interview as peanut products are a highly used source of nutrition in nearly every daycare. With your daughter's severe allergy, she could come upon it by simply entering the home.

Good luck in your search.

this!!!!

[childcaremom]

Originally Posted by nannyde

I won't be available to discuss this tonight as I am conducting interviews for the slot. I am not at liberty to discuss this further as I am obligated to maintain confidentiality for the special needs child in my care. The child qualifies under the Disability Act which requires I keep all medical information confidential including treatments the child is currently receiving. As the parent of a special needs child who qualifies under the Disability Act I am certain you understand.

The good news is that we just met a couple of days ago and had only one interview. I am SO thankful we didn't have peanut products out and on our person during the interview. It could have been a devastating outcome since you were unaware of your child's allergy at that time. We can all be grateful nothing happened to your precious child.

I would encourage you to notify any prospective provider BEFORE the interview as peanut products are a highly used source of nutrition in nearly every daycare. With your daughter's severe allergy, she could come upon it by simply entering the home.

Good luck in your search.

I wouldn't even answer the phone.

[Tasha]

Originally Posted by nannyde

I won't be available to discuss this tonight as I am conducting interviews for the slot. I am not at liberty to discuss this further as I am obligated to maintain confidentiality for the special needs child in my care. The child qualifies under the Disability Act which requires I keep all medical information confidential including treatments the child is currently receiving. As the parent of a special needs child who qualifies under the Disability Act I am certain you understand.

The good news is that we just met a couple of days ago and had only one interview. I am SO thankful we didn't have peanut products out and on our person during the interview. It could have been a devastating outcome since you were unaware of your child's allergy at that time. We can all be grateful nothing happened to your precious child.

I would encourage you to notify any prospective provider BEFORE the interview as peanut products are a highly used source of nutrition in nearly every daycare. With your daughter's severe allergy, she could come upon it by simply entering the home.

Good luck in your search.

I love this letter but don't you think she will think I am taunting her with the bolded part?

[daycare]

Originally Posted by Thriftylady

this!!!!

I would let her call and I would tell her what nan said. I would make certain to make it clear that it's not matter of CANT it's a matter of WILL NOT.

[Tasha]

Originally Posted by daycare

I would let her call and I would tell her what nan said. I would make certain to make it clear that it's not matter of CANT it's a matter of WILL NOT.

Does she have a legal case against me if I say this?

[Rockgirl]

Originally Posted by Tasha

I love this letter but don't you think she will think I am taunting her with the bolded part?

You could always just say you won't be available to talk this evening, then use the rest of the letter.

[childcaremom]

I would tell her that you unfortunately are unavailable to talk on the phone. That your decision is final and that the circumstances are such that you cannot disclose the personal information.

I would then suggest that she call your local referral agency and leave it at that.

Not too much info but enough to say that it isn't open for discussion.

(I think you dodged a HUGE bullet with this dcm.)

[daycare]

Originally Posted by Tasha

Does she have a legal case against me if I say this?

I can't say, but in CA we have the right to refuse service if we feel that we can not meet the needs of the child or that it would jeopardize the care of the other children in any way shape or form.

She needs a nut free environment, you are not one, therefore she can not enroll.

[daycare]

Originally Posted by childcaremom

I would tell her that you unfortunately are unavailable to talk on the phone. That your decision is final and that the circumstances are such that you cannot disclose the personal information.

I would then suggest that she call your local referral agency and leave it at that.

Not too much info but enough to say that it isn't open for discussion.

(I think you dodged a HUGE bullet with this dcm.)

leave that part out. Only take from it what you are comfortable with saying.

On a side note...this mother is already causing you stress and the child hasn't even officially started yet. Imagine the nightmare this mother would have turned into trying to bully you into any number of things in the future.
Stand up for yourself, your family and your business don't be sorry, dont be wishwashy, tell her this is how it is in your home center. Tell her that you will not be providing care. Thank her for her interest and hang up.

If she insist:
Tell her she is more than welcome to bring her child but you will contact your lawyer before hand at her expense and she and her husband will have to sign a waiver releasing you and your center from negligence or liability because your center is and will not be nut free.

[nannyde]

Originally Posted by Tasha

I love this letter but don't you think she will think I am taunting her with the bolded part?

No

She does BOLD in your face. She speaka da language.

I have a hard time believing her kid just got diagnosed because that is a process and she knows a helluva lot about it considering her kid just got diagnosed five minutes ago.

My guess is she left the last daycare over this and every time she says the kid has this upfront she gets turned away. She's most likely gone onto some mommy Facebook groups who have gotten her schooled on how to force her way in. She was unprepared for special meets special. She needs more specifics so she can insist the other special can do it another way. Without having this info she can't force you to do it AND the mommy groups won't have any good advice.

You MUST get a note from your doctor stating your child is to use nut products to manage her blood sugar. Have that on hand for the DHS visit you will be getting soon.

With the child's start date so soon you seriously wouldn't even have TIME to test out other food products that may help stabilize her sugars and frankly she shouldn't have to be a guinea pig for another special needs kids special needs. There are a zillion daycares out there ... the mom needs to figure it out not you and your special needs kid.

[MyAngels]

Well shoot. I had hoped for the best, guess I should have known better

What Nannyde said sounds like the perfect way to handle this.

She's just miffed because she thought she was going to bully you, and you can't be bullied. Shame on her.

[Josiegirl]

Of course I have no clue what her financial situation is but you would think, in a case like this, a mom would sacrifice a bit for a few years and stay home with her own child. That's what I'd do.

[Thriftylady]

Originally Posted by Josiegirl

Of course I have no clue what her financial situation is but you would think, in a case like this, a mom would sacrifice a bit for a few years and stay home with her own child. That's what I'd do.

Or get a nanny.

[crazydaycarelady]

One thing that hasn't been mentioned is that if the child is severly allergic to peanuts you would have to be trained or taught how to use an epi pen. Just one more inconvenience.

I had a kid with a severe nut allergy and he once came into contact with nuts while we were on a field trip. His throat started to closed and he started vomiting. I of course did not have the epi pen with us (lesson learned) but it was the scariest thing EVER! Never again!

[cheerfuldom]

I would not answer any more calls or emails from her. The decision has been communicated. I would send the deposit by certified mail so you know she got it. The only response I would give her is if she asks about the deposit, I would reply with the tracking number only so she knows that you have tracking on it and can see when she got it.

Do NOT answer the phone! She will only take more of your time by crying and complaining about your decisions or worse, arguing and whatnot. There is nothing to be gained by that. The only response I would give her by email is "I understand you are upset, but the decision is final." Do not let her bait you and do not worry about her threats if it comes to that. You havent done anything wrong and she should be thankful that you are honest in letting her child go if you cannot accommodate her.

[Tasha]

DCM did call me last night and I am still furious and upset. She told me that it was very unprofessional of me to accept a child, then reject her when discovering her care might require ''a little bit more work.'' I asked her if she read my email, that I had a child whose diet is dependent on peanuts. That it wasn't a matter of just a little more work. She got sarcastic and said ''Right, she just has to have peanuts or something terrible will happen.''
So right there I cut her off and told her there were plenty of childcare options in our city, and good luck. But then, this: What if they all discriminate against us like you have? I told her that I am not discriminating against anyone, and I am hanging up the phone. And I did. And now I am praying I never hear from her again.

[mommyneedsadayoff]

Oh man Well, ont he bright side, you dodged a HUGE bullet! Good luck to whoever ends up accepting her kid!

[nannyde]

Originally Posted by Tasha

DCM did call me last night and I am still furious and upset. She told me that it was very unprofessional of me to accept a child, then reject her when discovering her care might require ''a little bit more work.'' I asked her if she read my email, that I had a child whose diet is dependent on peanuts. That it wasn't a matter of just a little more work. She got sarcastic and said ''Right, she just has to have peanuts or something terrible will happen.''
So right there I cut her off and told her there were plenty of childcare options in our city, and good luck. But then, this: What if they all discriminate against us like you have? I told her that I am not discriminating against anyone, and I am hanging up the phone. And I did. And now I am praying I never hear from her again.

She will most likely turn you in. Get a note from your Doc and get your house ready for an inspection. Just remember... going thru an inspection you know is coming and getting a note from your Doc is a few days of inconvenience. Having to adjust your child's diet and rid your life and the incoming daycare kids life of peanuts is WAY more of a problem. Take one for the team and just nut up for the inspection.

[nannyde]

Big mistake taking her call. Less said over the phone is best. Email gives you proof.

[crazydaycarelady]

Dodged bullet - blessing in disguise.

[Baby Beluga]

Oh boy, this mom sounds like a piece of work.

I will never understand the mind set of parents who feel the need to make another person adjust to them verses the parent finding a place they fit in to. Many many centers are completely peanut/nut free. I wonder what this moms reasoning is for trying to find (and likely change) an in home vs enrolling her child in a center where peanut/nut free rules are already in place?

[sharlan]

I would not be able to accommodate this child, either.

I'm sitting here right now drinking a smoothie with peanut powder in it.

I think the mom knew and was trying to pull one over on you.

[Rockgirl]

I don't understand how she expected you to change your HOME to a nut-free environment. I know some schools and centers have gone nut-free, but this is your home! Sigh....entitled people!

[nannyde]

Originally Posted by Baby Beluga

Oh boy, this mom sounds like a piece of work.

I will never understand the mind set of parents who feel the need to make another person adjust to them verses the parent finding a place they fit in to. Many many centers are completely peanut/nut free. I wonder what this moms reasoning is for trying to find (and likely change) an in home vs enrolling her child in a center where peanut/nut free rules are already in place?

Money

Home daycare is cheaper AND she will have the ability to act the way she has acted so far ..

It's no big deal
Do this
(THIS btw is a HUGE deal)

[laundrymom]

Originally Posted by nannyde

Money

Home daycare is cheaper AND she will have the ability to act the way she has acted so far ..

It's no big deal
Do this
(THIS btw is a HUGE deal)

Originally Posted by Tasha

DCM did call me last night and I am still furious and upset. She told me that it was very unprofessional of me to accept a child, then reject her when discovering her care might require ''a little bit more work.'' I asked her if she read my email, that I had a child whose diet is dependent on peanuts. That it wasn't a matter of just a little more work. She got sarcastic and said ''Right, she just has to have peanuts or something terrible will happen.''
So right there I cut her off and told her there were plenty of childcare options in our city, and good luck. But then, this: What if they all discriminate against us like you have? I told her that I am not discriminating against anyone, and I am hanging up the phone. And I did. And now I am praying I never hear from her again.

You did dodge a bullet, but relax there's nothing she would be able to do. You did great because you followed your intuition and handled it fast.

She can get a nanny or have a public daycare accommodate her, and personally I will bet you won't hear from her. Apparently she's been down this road a few times, lol.

I have a quick question. When this lady filled out paperwork did she fill out a medical history? If she did and didn't mention the peanut allergy (which I would guess most of us think she knew before applying to your daycare) she lied by omission yet another thing on your side. Get that doctors note TODAY! And as others have said get all your ducks in a row. Maybe even a call to licensing letting them know what's going on. Good luck!!!

[nannyde]

Originally Posted by Unregistered

I have a quick question. When this lady filled out paperwork did she fill out a medical history? If she did and didn't mention the peanut allergy (which I would guess most of us think she knew before applying to your daycare) she lied by omission yet another thing on your side. Get that doctors note TODAY! And as others have said get all your ducks in a row. Maybe even a call to licensing letting them know what's going on. Good luck!!!

Naw she doesn't have to disclose.

It's a good idea to put a sign on your door saying "We heart nuts", answer the door with a reses peanut butter cup, and have a pack of nutter butters sitting on the table at EVERY interview.

A good offense is a good defense.

They have the right to not disclose. That needs to be dealt with. Obvs... see this thread

[LysesKids]

Originally Posted by nannyde

Naw she doesn't have to disclose.

It's a good idea to put a sign on your door saying "We heart nuts", answer the door with a reses peanut butter cup, and have a pack of nutter butters sitting on the table at EVERY interview.

A good offense is a good defense.

They have the right to not disclose. That needs to be dealt with. Obvs... see this thread

In my paperwork it requires them to list any known medical or mental issue be disclosed so that I can properly care for said baby; it also says in my contract that omissions of known issues is grounds for immediate termination - am I wrong for requiring that info?

[Blackcat31]

Originally Posted by LysesKids

In my paperwork it requires them to list any known medical or mental issue be disclosed so that I can properly care for said baby; it also says in my contract that omissions of known issues is grounds for immediate termination - am I wrong for requiring that info?

Some things are required by law to be reported and some things are not. Depends on the condition. I would check your state licensing regulations to be sure.

I also wonder about this in certain situations being we are self-employed and have the ability to require certain things that other places can't...kwim?

To be safe and sure, I'd check with licensing.

[KiddieCahoots]

Originally Posted by nannyde

Naw she doesn't have to disclose.

It's a good idea to put a sign on your door saying "We heart nuts", answer the door with a reses peanut butter cup, and have a pack of nutter butters sitting on the table at EVERY interview.

A good offense is a good defense.

They have the right to not disclose. That needs to be dealt with. Obvs... see this thread

...........Ohhhh... does that bring back memories!
"I want another butter, peanut butter, sandwich cookie" ..........

Sorry everybody....carry on....

[Tasha]

Originally Posted by Unregistered

I have a quick question. When this lady filled out paperwork did she fill out a medical history? If she did and didn't mention the peanut allergy (which I would guess most of us think she knew before applying to your daycare) she lied by omission yet another thing on your side. Get that doctors note TODAY! And as others have said get all your ducks in a row. Maybe even a call to licensing letting them know what's going on. Good luck!!!

She did fill out a medical history and checked no for no known allergies.

[Tasha]

Originally Posted by LysesKids

In my paperwork it requires them to list any known medical or mental issue be disclosed so that I can properly care for said baby; it also says in my contract that omissions of known issues is grounds for immediate termination - am I wrong for requiring that info?

I don't have this in my contract but you better believe it's going in now.

[crazydaycarelady]

No, that is a good thing to have in there! In fact I may add it in. I had a friend who started a baby and found out on the first day that the mom neglected to mention the had had a giant puffy open-wound like birthmark covering half his torso that required multiple salve applications and that he was on 4 different kinds of medication including pain meds!

[Thriftylady]

Originally Posted by Tasha

She did fill out a medical history and checked no for no known allergies.

Well if she checked there were no known allergies, that is all the evidence you need that she lied going in and it affects if you can properly care for the child.

[nannyde]

Originally Posted by Tasha

She did fill out a medical history and checked no for no known allergies.

How many days between when she filled that out and then told you about the allergy?

[Tasha]

Originally Posted by nannyde

How many days between when she filled that out and then told you about the allergy?

She interviewed on Thursday, and turned in the paperwork on Sunday. But there was no mention of any allergies during the interview. So I guess there was only a 2-day timeframe.

[mommyneedsadayoff]

Originally Posted by Tasha

She interviewed on Thursday, and turned in the paperwork on Sunday. But there was no mention of any allergies during the interview. So I guess there was only a 2-day timeframe.

Then she knew. You did the right thing and she will continue to have issues if she is not upfront and honest with other providers. Personally, it is not the allergy that bothered me so much with your situation. It was the convenience of when the allergy was "discovered" and how she didn't ask for you to make accommodations, but expected(demanded) it. That does not sit well with me. I am so happy you got out of that and I am glad you had this forum to help you through it! They have saved me many times and taught me soooo much!

[daycare]

I guess what i don't get is why would you want to enroll your child in an environment that would be potentially DEADLY to them.

I am vegan and without nuts I would more than likely get ill. You can't live a healthy life without protein.

Man i dont get how a parent can come in and just expect you to never purchase an item with trace nuts.

I have seen on many food items that are not nut related have a warning on them that say something like trace amounts of peanuts may be found in this product due to potential cross contact during manufacturing. It may not be word for word, but something like this.

So basically this lady expects you to now alter your entire family and daycare families diet for her child.

Not going to happen.

[Shell]

Wow, just read through this long thread!

I absolutely agree that she knew about the allergy and tried to sneak it in after you had already accepted dcg and the $.

I had a parent very casually mention that her son gets seizures a few days before he was due to start. I thought it was a very sneaky thing to do-
Just be upfront so you can get your child the help they need! But, she probably has found that being honest makes it harder to find daycare, so she figures she can just slide it in.

I am very impressed with Nannyde's advice, and am so happy that you followed what she said. Hats off to you, Nan and BC- I would have never thought of special meets special- but it is spot on.

Posts like this make this forum such a great place to learn something new.

You absolutely dodged a bullet- dcm sounds terrible to deal with and is used to getting her way!

[nannyde]

Originally Posted by Tasha

She interviewed on Thursday, and turned in the paperwork on Sunday. But there was no mention of any allergies during the interview. So I guess there was only a 2-day timeframe.

Wow. You would think that someone who was delivered that DEVASTATING new news would need TIME to learn about it, learn about how to keep the kid safe in public, and grieve. It seems to me a normal mom would take some time off of work and take stock because it IS life threatening.

For her to find out on a Friday or weekend and be WILLING to trust ANYONE with her kid seems awfully suspect.

I think she knows she has to tell the provider because it is life threatening but she waits until the provider says yes and THEN she mentions it in passing.

[nannyde]

Originally Posted by daycare

I guess what i don't get is why would you want to enroll your child in an environment that would be potentially DEADLY to them.

I am vegan and without nuts I would more than likely get ill. You can't live a healthy life without protein.

Man i dont get how a parent can come in and just expect you to never purchase an item with trace nuts.

I have seen on many food items that are not nut related have a warning on them that say something like trace amounts of peanuts may be found in this product due to potential cross contact during manufacturing. It may not be word for word, but something like this.

So basically this lady expects you to now alter your entire family and daycare families diet for her child.

Not going to happen.

I can't imagine the financial loss of what could be, a full stock of food you have purchased for the daycare and family. If I had to rid my current stock of peanuts and trace it would leave me with very little food. An average provider couldn't afford that.

I can't imagine having to maintain the peanut free 24/7. You couldn't have peanut products even on your days off in your home.

I don't agree with requiring home providers to make this accommodation. I don't agree because it affects the home during non business hours. It's so labor intensive and the stakes are so high if you, your husband, your kids or daycare parents male a mistake. If ANYONE makes a mistake it's on you to manage and be held accountable.

I also think it's financially a hardship. The staff hours to source food and being limited to non trace foods could get very expensive.

Ok so I have to add my story! When I worked in the preschool portion of a private school, I had a child who was (allegedly) allergic to peanuts. So, (I was the director of the preschool) I had to buy all the snack supplies that were not "processed in a plant that also processes peanuts" etc... And yes that was a huge PITA and was a big expense. Also I had to watch every other child's lunches, snacks, hands and faces very closely. Well, one day the girl ate someone else's cracker that was "processed in a plant... etc" that the other kid brought to school. So, I freak out and the child looks fine and I call the mom and she asks how she looks and says not to worry if she looks fine... Okay, that was a little strange, your kid is allergic to peanuts, gets exposed, but don't worry at all. The year went on, same exhausting and expensive efforts of precautions. Then one day, at the end of the year, it was the girl's birthday. The mom brought in a Von's cake. Straight outta the bakery case from our local average mass production grocery store. What! I knew she wasn't allergic. I knew it! Ridiculous she made me go through all that. Mom's a nut herself, sorry to say it.

Now, I'm not saying the child in the OP's situation isn't allergic at all- just saying, yeah, it's a big expense and PITA - and that was at a separate location. Can't imagine in my own residence!