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Old 10-08-2015, 01:05 PM
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Default Interviews when husband is not home

How do you all handle interviews when you know you're husband will not be home? This hadn't been an issue yet as I'd only mostly met with moms who came alone with their child. I did meet with one family where both parents were present, but my husband was here that evening so I didn't even think about it. But yesterday I had set up that interview and it was a lady who e-mailed me from craigslist and she and her husband were going to come. After I set it up I realized what I'd done and I was kind of uncomfortable meeting complete strangers but went ahead anyway since it was in the middle of the day and our neighbors were home. It turned out fine of course, but later that afternoon I had a dad wanting to meet me that evening, and my husband wouldn't have been home yet then either. I sure didn't want to meet alone with a man in my home without even his child there (he's divorced from his wife and the child was with his mom), so I told him I wouldn't be able to until tomorrow (today now). So it has me thinking, am I being overly cautious? Or do you also not meet alone with a man? And what about families who contact you from craigslist and you can't find any information on them to see if they're legit? Obviously I'll have dads picking their child up or dropping them off, so I expect to have them in my home when my husband isn't here at various times, but for an interview I felt more cautious of doing that since I'd never met him.
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Old 10-08-2015, 01:15 PM
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As a widowed nana, I always have to interview by myself; after the first few years it got easier, but then my neighbors always watch who comes & goes in this area (neighborhood watch); the lady right across the street is my emergency back up too, so she always is told when a parent will be interviewing (I only offer T, W or TH @ 6pm for meetings)
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Old 10-08-2015, 01:37 PM
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I guess I never even thought about it!
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Old 10-08-2015, 01:45 PM
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I honestly don't worry about it. Maybe I should? I only interview with children present so I wouldt have anyone come in without their child. It's a profession with a lot of trust in both directions.
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Old 10-08-2015, 02:06 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Preschool/daycare teacher View Post
How do you all handle interviews when you know you're husband will not be home? This hadn't been an issue yet as I'd only mostly met with moms who came alone with their child. I did meet with one family where both parents were present, but my husband was here that evening so I didn't even think about it. But yesterday I had set up that interview and it was a lady who e-mailed me from craigslist and she and her husband were going to come. After I set it up I realized what I'd done and I was kind of uncomfortable meeting complete strangers but went ahead anyway since it was in the middle of the day and our neighbors were home. It turned out fine of course, but later that afternoon I had a dad wanting to meet me that evening, and my husband wouldn't have been home yet then either. I sure didn't want to meet alone with a man in my home without even his child there (he's divorced from his wife and the child was with his mom), so I told him I wouldn't be able to until tomorrow (today now). So it has me thinking, am I being overly cautious? Or do you also not meet alone with a man? And what about families who contact you from craigslist and you can't find any information on them to see if they're legit? Obviously I'll have dads picking their child up or dropping them off, so I expect to have them in my home when my husband isn't here at various times, but for an interview I felt more cautious of doing that since I'd never met him.
See my CL ad always directs families to my website, there they can get all the info they need, then if they are interested, they contact me thru my contact page including addresses & phone #; I call them within 24 hrs of getting the email and set up a phone interview, then a face to face is done if the phone interview goes well... If they send me contact info it's a 90% bet they are onboard with my policies already because they listed online, along with fees. With the contact info it's easy to pull up Facebook info a lot of times
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Old 10-08-2015, 02:11 PM
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I have been a single mother for about 10 years, therefore for about 10 years have interviewed with only myself or myself and my daughter(s) in the house. I can only think of a couple of times when I got a bad feeling about potential clients that I allowed into my home for an interview. Overall, I don't feel uneasy. But I have always been the type (well, since my ex became abusive) that envisioned what I would do if someone attacked me or pulled a weapon on me, so even when I get funny feelings about some interviews, I had already planned what I would do if something happens. I make sure to interview by the door, in better weather, leave the window (which we are also sitting by) open so I can yell or possibly jump out of it, I have us sit at a table that I can physically overturn onto them if needed, As they approach my home, take off their coats, etc. I am constantly scanning them for possible weapons and watching their hands if they keep them in pockets and do my best to make them take their hands out of their pockets so I can see they aren't holding a weapon.

Yeah, it's a little scary sometimes. We are letting complete strangers into our home. But you just have to do your best to make sure that they won't be of harm to you. And to prepare yourself/place yourself where you have an escape route if things get weird.
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Old 10-08-2015, 02:13 PM
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I like to talk on the phone for a while to get a feel. I have had people meet here from Craigslist when I was alone and they could have turned out to be a serial killer. I did have my DH text in every so often during that time and let them know he was just checking in being that I was alone. Didn't want them to think I was rudely texting someone back in the middle of an interview. Do you have a friend or neighbor that can check in?
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Old 10-08-2015, 02:19 PM
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I feel uncomfortable if it's only the dad. I know it's sexist but guys are stronger and bad things happen.
When I go and buy things from CL I call someone and they stay on the line until I'm done.
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Old 10-08-2015, 02:42 PM
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By the time it gets to interview I know more about them then they know I do. I Google their email, cell number. Get their names, Google that. Check county real estate to see if homeowner. Google distance from work home & my house. Check sex offender database. Thanks to internet for so much data. 😅😅 I take pic of license plate from my cottage bathroom window. Yes, I check that, too. I can't help it. I'm a left handed Virgo.
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Old 10-08-2015, 03:16 PM
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I never meet with parents alone. Ever. Either my husband. My adult son. My adult daughters boyfriend. My brother. Father in law, someone is here.
Under the guise of fixing something or picking something up or whatever. Or just in the family room watching a movie. But I'm never alone.
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Old 10-08-2015, 03:18 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by littletots View Post
By the time it gets to interview I know more about them then they know I do. I Google their email, cell number. Get their names, Google that. Check county real estate to see if homeowner. Google distance from work home & my house. Check sex offender database. Thanks to internet for so much data. 😅😅 I take pic of license plate from my cottage bathroom window. Yes, I check that, too. I can't help it. I'm a left handed Virgo.
LOL!

I am an information gatherer as well but not in the same way... and not for the same reasons. I am a right-brained Scorpio.


As for daycare.... I live in the same town I was born and raised in so I pretty much know every one of my daycare parents's families in one way or another.
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Old 10-08-2015, 04:25 PM
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With hubby being a truck driver, he is most never home when I interview. Sometimes families want to meet him and I have to tell them "well I can call you when he is home but it will be a list minute thing because he is never home more than 34 hours". If I didn't meet alone, I would never meet with anyone.
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Old 10-08-2015, 06:02 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by littletots View Post
By the time it gets to interview I know more about them then they know I do. I Google their email, cell number. Get their names, Google that. Check county real estate to see if homeowner. Google distance from work home & my house. Check sex offender database. Thanks to internet for so much data. 😅😅 I take pic of license plate from my cottage bathroom window. Yes, I check that, too. I can't help it. I'm a left handed Virgo.
Woo hoo... I started out as a left handed Virgo, but had to become ambidextrous ( is that spelled right?) due to an accident. I always check sex offender site & look @ FB, Google etc.
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Old 10-08-2015, 06:43 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Preschool/daycare teacher View Post
How do you all handle interviews when you know you're husband will not be home? This hadn't been an issue yet as I'd only mostly met with moms who came alone with their child. I did meet with one family where both parents were present, but my husband was here that evening so I didn't even think about it. But yesterday I had set up that interview and it was a lady who e-mailed me from craigslist and she and her husband were going to come. After I set it up I realized what I'd done and I was kind of uncomfortable meeting complete strangers but went ahead anyway since it was in the middle of the day and our neighbors were home. It turned out fine of course, but later that afternoon I had a dad wanting to meet me that evening, and my husband wouldn't have been home yet then either. I sure didn't want to meet alone with a man in my home without even his child there (he's divorced from his wife and the child was with his mom), so I told him I wouldn't be able to until tomorrow (today now). So it has me thinking, am I being overly cautious? Or do you also not meet alone with a man? And what about families who contact you from craigslist and you can't find any information on them to see if they're legit? Obviously I'll have dads picking their child up or dropping them off, so I expect to have them in my home when my husband isn't here at various times, but for an interview I felt more cautious of doing that since I'd never met him.
I did childcare for 20 years. I either had my husband or one of my adult children (sons or daughter) at least at home. I also only did interviews during the evening with no daycare children ever present. I would never let a stranger in the house when other people's children were there. Take that back...a little... I would meet with them one evening and then if they were okay they could come back when the children were there to get a feel for what it was like. I think only 1 or 2 families in all that time asked to come back during the day. They usually just signed up if they were interested.

I only had one uncomfortable experience but the guy wasn't at my house. He said he wanted to come over that very day. I told him the above and he got kind of snotty. He said his 'wife' had to work but the way he said the word wife made me believe he was making it up. He just sounded shady plus I had a hard and fast rule no strangers in the house when I was watching children. He kept bugging me and I told him about the no stranger rule. I said "I'm sure you can understand because if I were watching your child you probably wouldn't want me to bring strangers around them." He just got all pissed off so I really felt he was a weirdo. I just hung up.

Other than that I really didn't have any weirdos come for an interview.

Laurel
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  #15  
Old 10-08-2015, 09:26 PM
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Thank you everyone : ) This gives me some things to think about, and consider when it comes to doing my homework before they even get an interview. It's hard to do when they are in a hurry to find someone because their last "babysitter" (their words, not mine lol) had to quit for medical reasons suddenly and they need someone right away, so I feel more inclined to squeeze an interview in last minute. But with the dcd wanting to meet me very last minute yesterday when I was alone, that one I put off. I didn't know it at the time, but today when the dad pulled in my husband actually went in our bedroom and closed the door so he wouldn't know he was here, just as a way to see how he might act when he thinks I'm alone during drop offs or pick-ups That may be a little too cautious, but I still had to hand it to him for thinking of that
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