I have had a little boy here for a year. He is almost 2 now. When he started no issues starting daycare at all. Adjusted very well. When he started I didn't have as many kids as gradually there has been more added. He started at 3 days a week. Then schedule changes and he is here minimum 3 days a week. I told them I can't guarantee a spot for less than 3 days. So one week might be 3 but the next could be 4 or 5. Over the past few months he has started crying when he is dropped off. Not the normal little cry than stops. He escalates. You can't calm him. He actually goes around the room looking at whoever is there and than cries louder and louder. I usually try to let him stop on his own. Remove him to the other room to a playpen. Since he begins to get all the other kids crying. Usually stops within 10-15 minutes. But it has started becoming longer for him to settle. and he is getting louder. I had a few issues with him hitting other children for no reason. Just reaching up and hitting a little girl in the face with a closed hand. At times he just cries when you ask him not to do something. Today I gave the kids their snack. He wasn't eating. I said in a very nice tone. Eat your snack. He looks at my daughter starts to ball. I've asked him to help clean up toys. He starts crying. I've talked to the mom and asked a couple times now if maybe there is a reason he reacts that way. Try to figure out how to stop it. She always says he is probably tired or getting sick. But he had just slept 2 and half hours. Or he never actually ends of sick. I had this boys sister here for daycare for a few months. She is older. But she reacts the same ways. She is playing a games with another child. Child doesn't want to play with her because she isn't playing nice. And she sulks. Sulks like I have never seen before. She cries at a drop of a hat as well.

Anyone ever have a child like this? I really am wondering if maybe this is how the parents are reacting/acting at home. My guess is either someone is screaming at him alot or someone is screaming and the other parent is coddling the child. Love to know how other deal with a child like this. Seems like the more attention I give when he is like this the worst it gets. Basically now I put him upstairs in the playpen and tell him when he stops crying he can come back down. Then I proceed to go and up and down. Over and over. Usually the first, second and third time I open the door he looks at me and starts all over again. If I try to pick him up he screams more. If I try to bring him back with the other kids he will go in their face and cry. directly looking at them. There was a couple of days last week I couldn't look at him for about an hour. When he was looking at me I would have to walk around and not look directly at him if he was looking at me.

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Never to that extent! But it is apparently a very effective technique at home!! Mom probably doesn't know because she stops it. She doesn't have to deal with the fit because she gives them what they want before it escilates.
With kids who cry or whine here to get what they want I say: you can cry if your hurt or scared or sad but all other crying hurts my ears. Or: your throwing a fit- you can but not in my area. Then I ask: are you done throwing a fit so you can join us?
Find whatever phrase that works for you and just repeat that with no emotion. Hopefully he will get it!

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I wonder, can a child at that age have depression? Here is a thread that is similar to yours: https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=53089

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I've had a few like that also, but also not to that extent.

The ones I had at were the worst about it came from very unhealthy environments at home.

Is the child verbal at all. Can he tell you WHY he's so upset??

When all this started was anything different besides additional children??

I had a child once who was a big cryer only at drop off. Come to find out, mom would threaten him with "you be good or else x or you've been bad so you are going to daycare" so the child thout they came here as punishment. Of course, after a few minutes ey figured it was fun here so who cares.

I had to threaten terming if mom didn't stop.

Here are some thoughts.

(1) home life

(2) at home he's rewarded for this behavior and you don't do that

(3) mom or dad is using your house as a punishment

(4) little boy isn't verbal enough to tell you what he needs or what is bothering him about the situation

I've found that most children who cry at that age simply do it because they don't know any other ways to communicate. A then I teach as many things as I can, oer than my usual basics, as sign language and at helps em a lot.

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I just got done with a course where they stated "yes indeed a child can suffer from Depression"

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That's tough, poor kid.

Children can have depression, but of course it is difficult to diagnose and most depressive disorders require the individual have symptoms for 6 months, (1 year for children). Often times depression comes out in irritability in children.

If this is fairly new, it can be an adjustment disorder. This would be good because symptoms will go away in six months then. This happens when the child/adult goes through something and the event triggers an emotional response that is not normal.

This is worded better:

Adjustment disorder is an unusually strong or long-lasting reaction to an upsetting event. The triggering event might be a divorce, a death in the family, moving to a new home, starting a different school, a break up, or a big life disappointment. A child with the disorder will have a hard time coping with his emotions and may become depressed or anxious, exhibit hostility, pick fights, or refuse to go to school, among many possible responses. The disorder is a reaction to an event of great importance to the child—whether or not that event appears significant to others. It can occur in young children, adolescents, and even adults (Child Mind Institute, 2013).

Sounds like it might actually fit.

Or as you said, it could be that the parents or someone else is yelling at him. Children who have authoritarian parents or parents who's parenting style is negative in other ways often exhibit depression symptoms and anxiety.

I hope this helps to maybe shed a light on it!

References
Child Mind Institute (2013). Adjustment Disorder. Retrieved from http://www.childmind.org/en/health/d...tment-disorder

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I guess the way I read it was that he did it in an attention seeking way- but didnt really seem upset- which was what my suggestion was based on.
I did have a dcb who cried pretty much all day- he was about 2 and he had a speech issue mom refused to address! I ended up terming- poor kid.

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That can definitely be the case too. I didn't read it that way, but reading it again that is definitely a possibility and your advice above was very good, regardless of the reasons.

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since both siblings have it, I will gaurentee it the kids play this game at home and they get their way. I know because I have the same kid her. I tell her to eat, she cries, cries at clean up, cries when I tell her share...because its effective at home so she thinks she can do it here.

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I think you are handling it well.

The only thing I would change, if you have the space, is to move his crying spot to a quiet place in the room or a nearby room. So, when he is done crying, he can come of his own accord vs. your little up and down the stair thing.

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.
Less attention/interaction

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Thanks.
I felt a bit mean when everyone else read it to mean he may be really sad/upset- .

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Yeah I had tried keeping him in a closer room. But he runs in looking for that attention. He isn't crying all day. Just really over sensitive. I have heard his mom refer to him as sucky. He is definitely like that. He can sulk just like his sister. Hunches over, the face. I have never seen anything like this before. I have mentioned it again to the mom so hopefully she will look at what she is doing. I don't know if he is guessing that I'm going to scream next because that is what happens at home. When I asked her about how at home when at the table he cries because you ask him to eat what she does. She said she takes him out of the chair and puts him straight to bed. But I am thinking maybe alot of screaming going on with that. Its one thing to have one very very sensitive child. But two. That sounds like something they are doing at home.

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Right on! I have a set of these, too. There has been a time or two when the older one was redirected from something not allowed shortly before mom or dad picked up, and the crocodile tears were flowing. They helicopter all over her saying over and over "What's wrong? Poor baby!" and never a harsh word that tearing books, pushing a friend, or whatever it is I tell them the offense was is not okay. Little brother has picked up on this tactic as well.

To help keep it in check, we have our sad corner. It's a small area off the side with a small crib sheet (cuz this one soundlessly opens her mouth wide and the saliva falls in bucketfuls to the floor and that drive me NUTS!) with a Elmo to cuddle. That's were we go when we're "sad."

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I ignore attention-getting crying too. I tell them to use their words. If they continue to whine/cry, they go sit in the other room on the stair by the back door because their friends don't want to listen. When they are calm they can come back to join us. That's only for when they are using it to get their way of course and not real reasons.

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