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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Aggression in DCB
Gibson1110 12:15 PM 07-31-2013
Hi, I am new to the forum but have lurked for several months. I have been doing in home daycare for a little over a year now, but have 12 years of experience in early childhood education. I was curious though, on what everyone's policy or opinion is on an appropriate amount of aggression in preschoolers.

My husband and I have decided to raise our son with minimal amount of exposure to guns or violent shows until he is old enough to watch them. He is 3.5. It's also my philosophy to teach kindness, love, and emotional intelligence in order to help the kids in my care. The DCB that concerns me is going to be 5 in a few months. He has always been allowed to watch batman and other super hero shows. The things that were allowed haven't been an issue over the past year until recently when I have noticed it is all he wants to do. He always is talking about ninjas killing bad guys, batman killing bad guys, etc. If that is what they want to allow at home, that's really none of my business. I get that some parents find that behavior typical of boys (I choose to raise my son differently).

He is obsessed with killing things, even throwing rocks and sticks at a bird who was injured when we were outside (he has done this twice now). When he gets into trouble for it, I make him leave the area and he has to play in a designated spot. But then he is telling other children to go try to kill the bird.

I just need the opinions of some other providers to see if I am off base. Do any of you allow children to pretend to kill people/animals? Should I talk to his mom more? Suggestions???

THanks!
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Familycare71 01:48 PM 07-31-2013
Originally Posted by Gibson1110:
Hi, I am new to the forum but have lurked for several months. I have been doing in home daycare for a little over a year now, but have 12 years of experience in early childhood education. I was curious though, on what everyone's policy or opinion is on an appropriate amount of aggression in preschoolers.

My husband and I have decided to raise our son with minimal amount of exposure to guns or violent shows until he is old enough to watch them. He is 3.5. It's also my philosophy to teach kindness, love, and emotional intelligence in order to help the kids in my care. The DCB that concerns me is going to be 5 in a few months. He has always been allowed to watch batman and other super hero shows. The things that were allowed haven't been an issue over the past year until recently when I have noticed it is all he wants to do. He always is talking about ninjas killing bad guys, batman killing bad guys, etc. If that is what they want to allow at home, that's really none of my business. I get that some parents find that behavior typical of boys (I choose to raise my son differently).

He is obsessed with killing things, even throwing rocks and sticks at a bird who was injured when we were outside (he has done this twice now). When he gets into trouble for it, I make him leave the area and he has to play in a designated spot. But then he is telling other children to go try to kill the bird.

I just need the opinions of some other providers to see if I am off base. Do any of you allow children to pretend to kill people/animals? Should I talk to his mom more? Suggestions???

THanks!
Ill just talk about what I allow at dc...
I do not allow "fighting" each other. If I have a group that wants to I allow them to role play but the bad guy is always imaginary.
I do not allow sword or guns or weapon toys.
Instead of killing here we knock them out or put them in jail.

As for the animals- I allow no cruelty to animals. I'm assuming your family doesn't hunt- do you know if this boys does?
For me I would say : the only time it is ok to kill an animal is if you need the meat to eat.
We do not treat animals poorly- I don't even let them squash bugs for fun. The only time a bug is killed is if its in my house. We look at them, talk about them sometimes hold them but then they go free. I explain that the outdoors is their home. We have to respect that. Every being has a purpose- I try to share it if I can.

I don't remeber if he is new but most kids learn pretty quickly what behavior is allowed where- if you are consistent he should get it. Hopefully. I always tell my kids: we don't do---- here... Because many times they can at home. Hth
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