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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>I actually had to do it
grateday 06:01 AM 06-17-2015
I cannot believe I did it. I actually sent a child home for behavior. It was not the behavior but the inability to teach/reach the child for the hours they were here.

It was with a family though that is able to pick up in those instances.

I don't know how I feel, but it was more to get a message across that hurting others is not ok.

It was the severity and exhaustion in the child that really called in me "that's enough", they are not safe here for themselves or there peers.

I don't want to go into detail about what they did
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Play Care 06:29 AM 06-17-2015
I'm sorry it had to come to that.

What is your plan of action here? If I felt this was going to be an ongoing issue, I would just term.
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NightOwl 07:22 AM 06-17-2015
You do need a plan. If parents do not discipline him at home for what he did at your house, he'll view being sent home as a reward. Get with them and discuss how it was handled once he left your care and explain to them that they have to follow thru, or he'll continue the behavior in order to go home.
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Thriftylady 08:39 AM 06-17-2015
I agree a written plan of action is in order.
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Heidi 08:41 AM 06-17-2015
I agree with the other; either a written plan and a conference, or a termination.

How old is the child?
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grateday 04:49 PM 06-17-2015
I have boundaries with the parents, but at the same time I have had the kiddo a while. I have no intentions of terming the child but I want that child to see that what they did was not ok and hopefully mom would be on board with teaching them at home too. Yes, I spoke with mom, and yes I was when I spoke with mom. Mom, was at her kid because it was a busy workday. But I think that it helped the child in the long run.

I can see your point as mom picking up as a reward and that is why I don't want that sort of situation. I weighed the situation heavily before calling mom.

I think one of the hardest things to do is care for someone who's parenting style is a little different "I don't want to hurt there feelings kind of mom". While I see the positive in the parenting style to an extent, I also see the pitfalls and the entitlement trap it can lead to in 2 year olds.

I really think with 2 year olds you have to really teach, and in that process they are going to have to deal with disapointment.

I don't care if I disapoint my own son from time to time, if it teaches him, keeps others safe. The positive side to the I don't want to hurt there feelings approach is that it lends itself to creative solutions and problem solving at times.

My approach is more to change things up depending on what the child seems to need at any given time.

My plan is to still do things the way they are that are effective for me, and yes if I have to find myself in that situation again I will have to write a plan of action as much as I don't want to.

I think with this mom though it is better if we plan together because of her background and experience.
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Thriftylady 06:52 PM 06-17-2015
Originally Posted by grateday:
I have boundaries with the parents, but at the same time I have had the kiddo a while. I have no intentions of terming the child but I want that child to see that what they did was not ok and hopefully mom would be on board with teaching them at home too. Yes, I spoke with mom, and yes I was when I spoke with mom. Mom, was at her kid because it was a busy workday. But I think that it helped the child in the long run.

I can see your point as mom picking up as a reward and that is why I don't want that sort of situation. I weighed the situation heavily before calling mom.

I think one of the hardest things to do is care for someone who's parenting style is a little different "I don't want to hurt there feelings kind of mom". While I see the positive in the parenting style to an extent, I also see the pitfalls and the entitlement trap it can lead to in 2 year olds.

I really think with 2 year olds you have to really teach, and in that process they are going to have to deal with disapointment.

I don't care if I disapoint my own son from time to time, if it teaches him, keeps others safe. The positive side to the I don't want to hurt there feelings approach is that it lends itself to creative solutions and problem solving at times.

My approach is more to change things up depending on what the child seems to need at any given time.

My plan is to still do things the way they are that are effective for me, and yes if I have to find myself in that situation again I will have to write a plan of action as much as I don't want to.

I think with this mom though it is better if we plan together because of her background and experience.
It really irks me when people don't want to "disappoint" their kids. I am also against every kid gets a trophy. There are disappointments in life, and children have to learn to deal with them. As an adult, we don't always get into the college we want, don't always get the job we want, don't always get the promotion we want the list goes on and on. I don't understand why parents don't see this.
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