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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>What do you do for an inconsolable baby?
hsdcmama 01:43 PM 10-13-2015
I'm wondering if anyone has any ideas I haven't thought of. I have a difficult-tempered 4-month-old with silent reflux who is extremely sensitive to noise, too much activity, scares very easily when being picked up, etc. She also gets upset very easily and at times becomes inconsolable, with no apparent cause. Strangely enough, the only thing I have found that can calm her down during one of these episodes is to put her in her baby swing in the bathroom. It sounds wierd, but I'm not doing it to punish her or anything; we have a pretty patterned shower curtain in there and it's the only place in my house where it is calm and quiet, so when I can't calm her down I will put her swing in there facing the shower curtain and pull the door to so I can still peek in at her. She has settled down almost immediately both times I have done it, so obviously the calm and quiet is what she needed at that time. Both times she has fallen asleep, and then I will bring her back out to the main daycare area. I've told the baby's mom all about it, as I try to be very honest with her. She says she doesn't know how she feels about it, that it feels like I'm putting her baby in a "time-out" for being bad, but that she has seen these inconsolable crying spells herself when they have been visiting relatives, and at those times the baby only calms down when she is handed back to her mother. I am definitely not trying to punish the child in any way, only trying to remove her from the sensory overload that she seems to be experiencing during these times. Has anyone else had a similar experience? Am I wrong for putting the baby in the bathroom even though that is what works for her every time? Any advice would be appreciated!
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nothingwithoutjoy 05:16 PM 10-13-2015
It sounds like you're responding to the baby's needs based on your observations...exactly what you should be doing. There's a big difference between punishment and meeting needs, and the baby knows the difference by how you handle it: talk to her, tell her you see her need for quiet and you'll find a soothing spot (v. scolding and ordering to time out). You've articulated well here what and why you've done, and I imagine you're articulating it well w/mom, too. Maybe just add a bit about how you're distinguishing between time out and comfort. And best of luck to you (and baby); I know how draining it can be to listen to that inconsolable crying; my own daughter did it.
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hsdcmama 06:36 AM 10-14-2015
Thanks, that's how I felt about it. It's crazy how the parents can make you question yourself after the fact, even though you know you were doing what was best for the child. I had a hard time explaining it without it sounding like, "Your baby was screaming, so I put her in the bathroom"; like I stuck her in there out of frustration or as a punishment or something.
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Play Care 09:44 AM 10-14-2015
I wil say that I think there is honest, and then there is too honest

"DCM, when baby is crying inconsolably, I find having her in a quiet spot helps her to relax. I am always monitoring baby and making sure she is content. She rejoins the group as soon as she is ready"

No mention of the bathroom needed really.

(And I give this advice assuming 1.the bathroom is allowed DC space, 2. The door is open and you are monitoring baby, 3. Baby is not allowed to sleep in the swing in the bathroom - i.e. All rules and regs are being followed while you are working to meet the infants needs.)
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