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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Do you allow your teenager to help another teen babysit?
permanentvacation 08:40 PM 04-25-2015
Here's the situation:

Let's say you have a teenager named Sally. Sally is spending the night with her friend, Tina. Sally's friend, Tina gets asked to babysit a 10 year old girl at the girl's house. Tina agrees to babysit the girl. Would you allow your daughter, Sally, to go with Tina to babysit the girl at her house?
Meeko 10:24 PM 04-25-2015
I would not allow it. Tina was asked to babysit. Unless the parents specifically TOLD Tina to bring a friend....then she should not take anyone along.

And Tina needs to get her priorities straight. If she has Sally over for the night, then she has a guest and shouldn't be thinking about taking a babysitting job.
Luvnmykidz 04:20 AM 04-26-2015
I agree with Meeko.
Thriftylady 06:18 AM 04-26-2015
I agree with Meeko. Now as far as just the two of them babysitting, like maybe it was planned ahead and okay with the parents and all, then I say it depends on the teenagers and how they would handle it.
jenboo 08:08 AM 04-26-2015
I've done it before but the parents knew ahead of time and said it was fine.
If the parents didn't know, then I would not allow it.
lovemykidstoo 08:14 AM 04-26-2015
Originally Posted by jenboo:
I've done it before but the parents knew ahead of time and said it was fine.
If the parents didn't know, then I would not allow it.
Same here. The parents actually liked it because in this situation they were somewhat nervous about having 1 girl babysit their 2 kids, so it was better for them.
CraftyMom 10:28 AM 04-26-2015
I do not allow my 14 year old to bring a friend when she babysits in general. I know how it was when I was that age and brought a friend along, I would have done a better job alone.

I tell her that her only concern when babysitting is the kids. I know her and if she brings a friend they will be less likely to have the kids as their main focus.

That being said, the same situation happened last weekend. My daughter had a friend sleeping over and then got asked to babysit. It was at night, the kids are in bed by 9pm. I told her it would be ok with me if her friend went over after the kids were sleeping to keep her company as long as she asked the kids' mom first. The mom was fine with it. So after the kids were sleeping I walked her friend over (only 3 houses down but it was night)
Crazy8 05:12 PM 04-26-2015
If the parents of the 10 year old were ok with it I would be fine with it. I remember babysitting with a friend when I was a teen. It was a little scary being in a house at night with sleeping kids so I liked having someone with me.
nannyde 05:15 PM 04-26-2015
No way. Learned my lesson having two staff assistants caring for kids at the same time. When many are responsible, none take responsibility.
permanentvacation 06:59 PM 04-26-2015
Well, it seems like there's a hand full of 'yes's' and a hand full of 'no's' to this situation.

Here's why I asked the question.

My daughter was spending the night with her friends. You know how I told you guys that all four girls sleep over the one girl's house over the weekend? Well, my daughter was sleeping over there and I called to ask where they were so I could either take her medicine to her or have her come home to get it. She told me they were babysitting some 10 year old at the 10 year old's house. I told her that she was supposed to be hanging out having fun and spending the night at her friend's house, not going to her job with her. That's not a typical sleep over activity! I was completely caught off guard! She said that the girl's mother knew that the 3 girls (I don't know why the 4th friend wasn't there. I didn't even think to ask why the 4th friend wasn't there.) were all at the girl's house babysitting together and was just fine with the friends being there.

But no one asked me if my daughter could go to some person's house that I don't know and be in that person's house without the homeowner home and be responsible for the livelihood of the 10 year old girl!

I told my daughter she wasn't allowed to go with her friend to babysit again. I don't know the parents of the child being babysat. And the parents don't know my child. My fear has to do with the liability of babysitting. If something happens to that lady's child or if something gets stolen from her house, she might try to charge everyone that was in her house while the child was being babysat.

I don't allow my daughter to babysit at other people's houses at all - not even by herself. I have allowed her to have the child come to our house for her to babysit the child. That way I can make sure that my daughter has a childproof area (the daycare room) to watch the child, I know that my daughter is in a safe environment (no one such as the mother's friend, roommate, older brother, etc. will be entering the home and might try to attack my daughter), and I am home in case there's an emergency such as the child chokes on something or gets hurt. I just don't want all that responsibility and liability on my daughter. And I don't want her in someone else's house alone.

My fears of allowing my daughter to babysit stems from an experience I had while babysitting as a teenager. I only babysit kids a few times as a teenager. The last time I did, I was hired to sleep over the entire night and babysit the child all night long because the child's mother was going to be out on a date and planned not to come home until the following morning. But instead of them staying out all night, in the middle of the night, the lady brought her date to her house where I was babysitting the kid. The lady was drunk off her butt however, the man, of course was no where's near as drunk as she was. I didn't drive at the time and my mother was afraid to drive because she used to randomly pass out (later, we found out she had hypoglycemia). So, I needed either the lady or her 'friend' to take me home. But since the lady was so drunk, I was afraid to leave the kid there and I didn't want some man that I didn't know (her date) to drive me home. So I stayed even though they were there. The man kept coming into the little girl's room all throughout the night and just sitting there looking at me and the little girl. I was scared to death that he might try to rape me or do something to the little girl. The mother at some point passed out from being so drunk, so she was no help to make me feel safe with that man there. He never put his hands on the little girl or me, but he did come into the girl's room constantly and just watch us for a while. I was so afraid for the little girl and myself that I made sure to stay awake all night long. Sometimes he or I would say something just to try to make the fact that he was in the room seem more normal. But it was one of the scariest times of my life!

Obviously that experience made me fearful of my daughters babysitting. I have never allowed either of my girls babysit in other people's houses. They've both babysat a couple of times, but I made the child come to my house and I made sure to be home as well.
Unregistered 02:56 AM 04-27-2015
My 15 year old babysitter brings a friend each time she watches my 7 year old. I don't mind. More eyes watching. I only pay my babysitter. If she shares her pay or not that is her business.
CraftyMom 10:54 AM 04-27-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
My 15 year old babysitter brings a friend each time she watches my 7 year old. I don't mind. More eyes watching. I only pay my babysitter. If she shares her pay or not that is her business.
Well...not necessarily more eyes watching. You would think so, but sometimes it ends up being LESS eyes watching. At that age (unless they are very responsible) the teenagers will be more likely to be goofing around together and less likely to be paying attention to the child. Especially if they have phones and are texting or laughing at silly videos, or snap chatting their other friends

My daughter's friend has a 1 year old sister and a 10 year old brother. A few months ago my daughter was sleeping over there. Her and her friend were in charge of watching the 10 year old and the baby (who walks).

My daughter came home and was telling me this "hilarious" story about how her and her friend were playing video games or something, and forgot about the baby. Then they realized "geez, where is she?" They found her in the bathroom. The part they found "hilarious" is that she was splashing in the toilet and got the remote stuck in the hole of the toilet and they couldn't get it out! It was so funny to them that they forgot about her!

I was mortified! I told her doesn't she realize that in the amount of time that they forgot about her she could be head first in the toilet dead? Or could have wandered out the door? I gave her a bunch of examples of scenarios, to which she replied that I was over reacting.

So after that, no. I will not let her have a friend over while babysitting. The only exception was one time, AFTER the kids were sleeping.
MsBell 11:54 AM 04-29-2015
idk what kind of teenagers we're talking about here, but whenever i babysat with a friend, it was easier, esp if there were multiple kids. Divide and conquer, ya know? People like to give teenagers a bad reputation, but in my experience, a teenager babysitting is more likely to use their phone to blast the entire lord of the rings soundtrack and reenact it with the kids then sit on the couch on facebook. maybe that's what the parents come home to, but that's def just them trying to seem more adult to you. Have you ever walked in on your babysitter standing on the coffee table, wearing a blanket as a cape and using a cane as a wand, while giving an 'army' of toddlers armed with foam swords a speech worthy of Mel Gibson? it's mortifying, from the babysitter's perspective.

but on the other hand, everyone involved was in the know about who was watching the kids, and where their kids were. it was never spur of the moment during a sleepover?? that is the weirdest sleepover activity ever.
Starburst 12:24 PM 04-29-2015
Well there was a situation where I babysat with a friend once and it was a good thing we were both there (Although we were both over 18 at the time).

My friend's mom owned a home daycare that I occasionally subbed at (she worked there regularly). She regularly would be asked to babysit the DCKs on weekend. I had recently moved to a new city (no car) and was spending the week at her place to help with the upcoming preschool graduation. She had to babysit for two little boys (a 2 year old and a 7 month old) who were getting over being sick. The parents saw me occasionally at the daycare so they knew me and said it was okay for me to babysit with her (no pay, just company).

The older one was in a bad mood during dinner (didn't want to eat and crying alot) and she was growing frustrated. I was in the room playing with the boys while she was cleaning the dishes (she needed a break), the older boy told me his tummy hurt. I told her and we kept an eye on him and within an hour he thew up several times.

His mom was on a boat with some of her friends from work and the dad was at a business dinner out of town (over an hour drive from both). The baby was still sick (runny nose) and it was close to his bed time and she didn't know what to do because the house was in the outskirts of town and didn't want them both to be fussy, so I told her I'll stay and keep an eye on the baby while she took the tot to the ER. Luckily I did because she said the taught was in a bad mood, he was really attached to my friend and she said any anytime a doctor or nurse tried to do something (like put on his hospital bracelet) he only wanted her to do it.

The parents were actually glad there were two babysitters present that night because it would have been hard for her to take both of them to the ER with the older one being fussy and if the baby were sleepy (they also liked that we stick to a regular sleep routine with the baby; especially while he was sick). I never asked to be paid for the I was home with the baby but the next day at the daycare the mom gave me $20 (they were at the ER for about 2 hours).

Sometimes it is better to have more then one caregiver, especially if there is more then one child. But I know there are some cases where too many cooks spoil the gulash.
Tags:babysitter, teens
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