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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Help with a Difficult Employee
Desperate for help 08:02 PM 10-30-2015
I have an employee who was great in the beginning and now she is rude to me (the owner and her boss) and the children. She will try and tell me what to do and only focuses on certain children. Her mood will switch from bad to good in a nano second. I will ask her to do something (for example: take the children outside). She looked at me and said "but I took them out this morning..." She expects me to do her duties while she is doing her homework. I hired her to take care of the children. HELP!! Today was the last straw, but I don't want to fire (I will avoid conflict at all costs). Any advice? She only works 2 days so cutting her hours would be hard, not to mention she is always asking for time off.
Michael 03:03 AM 10-31-2015
Welcome to the forum. Here are come more threads relating to Employee problems: https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.p...loyee+problems
Laurel 09:08 AM 10-31-2015
Originally Posted by Desperate for help:
I have an employee who was great in the beginning and now she is rude to me (the owner and her boss) and the children. She will try and tell me what to do and only focuses on certain children. Her mood will switch from bad to good in a nano second. I will ask her to do something (for example: take the children outside). She looked at me and said "but I took them out this morning..." She expects me to do her duties while she is doing her homework. I hired her to take care of the children. HELP!! Today was the last straw, but I don't want to fire (I will avoid conflict at all costs). Any advice? She only works 2 days so cutting her hours would be hard, not to mention she is always asking for time off.
I hate to say this but she is doing this because you allow it. Like many of us, you need to practice using your backbone. I have an employee who was great in the beginning and now she is rude to me (the owner and her boss) and the children. She will try and tell me what to do and only focuses on certain children. Her mood will switch from bad to good in a nano second. I will ask her to do something (for example: take the children outside). She looked at me and said "but I took them out this morning..." She expects me to do her duties while she is doing her homework. I hired her to take care of the children. HELP!! Today was the last straw, but I don't want to fire (I will avoid conflict at all costs). Any advice? She only works 2 days so cutting her hours would be hard, not to mention she is always asking for time off.
The first thing I would do is make a new rule "No homework during work hours." She shouldn't be doing anything while there except what you pay her to do.
If she was rude to me I'd say "I don't appreciate it when you talk to me like that. Is there a problem?" Don't just let her do it, get away with it, and do it again later. If she is rude to the children the same thing "I don't like it when you talk to the children like that. Is there something bothering you?"
Also, be sure her duties are clear. Does she have certain things she must do each day or is she assisting and just doing whatever you need her to do as it comes up? Either way is fine but just make sure she knows what to expect. When I had help in my home daycare I had an arrangement like the latter. Just kind of pitch in. That worked well with my personality.
When I was an employee in a daycare what I liked was:
1. Give everyone a share of the 'dirty work'. Don't make someone always do the least desirable work all the time. Not saying you are. Just be aware of that.
2. I used to like to do the creative stuff but my co-worker didn't. For some strange reason she really liked to clean.
We were a great team 
. Be sure to let employees do at least something they really enjoy each day.If she is just lazy and doesn't want to work, free her from her misery and find someone else who wants a job. AND don't feel bad about it.
Good luck!
CalCare 10:17 AM 10-31-2015
In addition to other ideas above, make a list of things to be done in "down times" (non-existant as they may be). So type up or write and laminate a sign. Put it up somewhere where it won't be ugly for your environment like inside a cabinet door. List what should be done and place them in order of priority. example:
2. Empty and fold laundry. Leave stacks on counter, move washer laundry to dryer, add dryer sheet and restart.
3. etc, etc, super specific with info on where to find items so she has no excuses, "oh well I didn't know where the sanitizer was"
Make a really long list. She will never have a chance to do homework (she never should- thats ridiculous!) And she can get things done without interupting you.
If there is any time when not caring for kids or you have no directions from me, do this list, in this order:
1. Sanitize infant toys from baskets in playroom. (use spray bottle marked sanitizer, spray, then wipe with washcloth from middle kitchen drawer)2. Empty and fold laundry. Leave stacks on counter, move washer laundry to dryer, add dryer sheet and restart.
3. etc, etc, super specific with info on where to find items so she has no excuses, "oh well I didn't know where the sanitizer was"
Make a really long list. She will never have a chance to do homework (she never should- thats ridiculous!) And she can get things done without interupting you.
Unregistered 11:33 AM 10-31-2015
I volunteer at a daycare and we had an employee do the exact same thing (except for the homework), instead of doing what she was suppose to be doing, she would do other things. Her sister in law that was also an employee there continousily warned her about what would happen and eventually we all got tired of it and the director, owner, assistant director had a meeting with her and fired her. The first time it happened she had to sign a statement stating that she had been warned and the consequences that would follow.
spedmommy4 12:26 PM 10-31-2015
I agree with the responses above and I will add that you need to document everything. Tell her the expectations and when she does not follow through, give her a write up. Place it in her employee file.
On the third write up, terminate. This protects you as an employer. Is she seeks unemployment, you can show she was willfully neglecting her job duties. I would also be looking for a replacement, just in case this doesn't work out.
On the third write up, terminate. This protects you as an employer. Is she seeks unemployment, you can show she was willfully neglecting her job duties. I would also be looking for a replacement, just in case this doesn't work out.
MarinaVanessa 12:39 PM 10-31-2015
You teach people how to treat you ... sorry, but that's pretty much what's happening here and sugar coating it isn't going to do you any favors.
You are the owner and therefore her boss and it seems like she is doing what she wants when she wants. I wish my previous employers would have paid me to do personal things while on the job (homework). But let's be realistic, that isn't a part of the job. It also doesn't sound like she's a good fit for caring for children.
If you want to give your employee a second chance you need to sit her down and talk to her about what EXACTLY your expectations are with speaking to the children, and her duties. CalCare gave great advice about having a list. This list should have a list of what her daily responsibilities will be and make it as specific as possible. Include things she needs to do on her "down time" in the order of importance like CalCare mentioned. I had a saying when I worked as a supervisor "If you have time to lean, you have time to clean". Have her SIGN that she understands and that this is her warning, add in there that if she attempts to negotiate or refuses to follow orders then she will be fired her for insubordination.
You'll need to spell it out for her so even though you don't want any confrontation are you willing to allow her to behave as she's been doing? Think on it some. It would be great to get an update as to what your choice ends up being and how it turns out.
You are the owner and therefore her boss and it seems like she is doing what she wants when she wants. I wish my previous employers would have paid me to do personal things while on the job (homework). But let's be realistic, that isn't a part of the job. It also doesn't sound like she's a good fit for caring for children.
If you want to give your employee a second chance you need to sit her down and talk to her about what EXACTLY your expectations are with speaking to the children, and her duties. CalCare gave great advice about having a list. This list should have a list of what her daily responsibilities will be and make it as specific as possible. Include things she needs to do on her "down time" in the order of importance like CalCare mentioned. I had a saying when I worked as a supervisor "If you have time to lean, you have time to clean". Have her SIGN that she understands and that this is her warning, add in there that if she attempts to negotiate or refuses to follow orders then she will be fired her for insubordination.
You'll need to spell it out for her so even though you don't want any confrontation are you willing to allow her to behave as she's been doing? Think on it some. It would be great to get an update as to what your choice ends up being and how it turns out.
Blackcat31 02:14 PM 10-31-2015
Originally Posted by Desperate for help:
I have an employee who was great in the beginning and now she is rude to me (the owner and her boss) and the children. She will try and tell me what to do and only focuses on certain children. Her mood will switch from bad to good in a nano second. I will ask her to do something (for example: take the children outside). She looked at me and said "but I took them out this morning..." She expects me to do her duties while she is doing her homework. I hired her to take care of the children. HELP!! Today was the last straw, but I don't want to fire (I will avoid conflict at all costs). Any advice? She only works 2 days so cutting her hours would be hard, not to mention she is always asking for time off.
Her behavior and your acceptance is the cost. I have an employee who was great in the beginning and now she is rude to me (the owner and her boss) and the children. She will try and tell me what to do and only focuses on certain children. Her mood will switch from bad to good in a nano second. I will ask her to do something (for example: take the children outside). She looked at me and said "but I took them out this morning..." She expects me to do her duties while she is doing her homework. I hired her to take care of the children. HELP!! Today was the last straw, but I don't want to fire (I will avoid conflict at all costs). Any advice? She only works 2 days so cutting her hours would be hard, not to mention she is always asking for time off.
Unless you are willing to do the hard work (standing up for yourself/your business) then nothing will ever change.
Will it result in conflict? maybe. maybe not
Will it be worth it? DEFINITELY!
kitykids3 05:30 PM 11-02-2015
I've recently (in the last year) had 2 employees like that. I wrote them up twice for their various disrespect or lack of doing their job. In their handbook and on the write up form they are informed that the 3rd time they are terminated. So it got to that point and I fired them. They thought they were going to tell me what they did or did not want to do, played on the phone, ignored the kids, etc. They both tried filing for unemployment, but because I had write ups and they had warnings for behavior, they did not end up getting it. 
As an employer, make sure you cover yourself with written stuff. Mine was even trying to accuse me of favoritism (bordering on racism, smh). Give her a written warning and if it doesn't work then terminate.
As an employer, make sure you cover yourself with written stuff. Mine was even trying to accuse me of favoritism (bordering on racism, smh). Give her a written warning and if it doesn't work then terminate.
Play Care 03:20 AM 11-03-2015
Originally Posted by Desperate for help:
I have an employee who was great in the beginning and now she is rude to me (the owner and her boss) and the children. She will try and tell me what to do and only focuses on certain children. Her mood will switch from bad to good in a nano second. I will ask her to do something (for example: take the children outside). She looked at me and said "but I took them out this morning..." She expects me to do her duties while she is doing her homework. I hired her to take care of the children. HELP!! Today was the last straw, but I don't want to fire (I will avoid conflict at all costs). Any advice? She only works 2 days so cutting her hours would be hard, not to mention she is always asking for time off.
If you want to avoid conflict, can you just get rid of her hours? "Susie, I won't need you for the next week at all." And then every week just say "Yeah, not going to need you this coming week either" I have an employee who was great in the beginning and now she is rude to me (the owner and her boss) and the children. She will try and tell me what to do and only focuses on certain children. Her mood will switch from bad to good in a nano second. I will ask her to do something (for example: take the children outside). She looked at me and said "but I took them out this morning..." She expects me to do her duties while she is doing her homework. I hired her to take care of the children. HELP!! Today was the last straw, but I don't want to fire (I will avoid conflict at all costs). Any advice? She only works 2 days so cutting her hours would be hard, not to mention she is always asking for time off.
So technically you're not firing her but no hours = no pay and maybe she'll go on her own?
Otherwise you will need to 1. talk to her about the issue and let her know what will be happening (ie warnings, write ups and termination) 2. Follow through. As a business owner I recommend doing this because you need to get a back bone when you run a business.
I had a terrible assistant when I first started out and I kind of wimped out - as such she has used me several times as a reference. I finally gave a truthful reference the last time she used me (she picked and chose what tasks she wanted to complete, called out a lot, felt this wasn't a "real" job, wasn't great with the kids, etc. )
But I wish I had been upfront with her then because then I wouldn't be in the position of having to give bad references...