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Christian Mother 05:56 PM 05-01-2012
At what age do you think children out grow daycare?

I have a newly 3 yr old dcb who I consistently have problems with. I am sure everyone on here hates to continually talk to the parents on behavior issues. I am not stranger to that as well. Today I had a rough day with dcb and instead of doing time outs I opted to discuss every rule he broke..****les he knows about but continually breaks. So here I am again talking to him about why we don't jump on the beds, take toys away from others, running in the house..the list goes on and on. I can give him time outs but he continues to do the things he knows he shouldn't... I'm tired...dcb argues everything with me to the point of even telling me it doesn't matter if he gets 1 time out bc he still gets to watch his tv show.

I said "oh! Well honey, when I have a talk with mommy about what you just told me..I am sure you will not be watching your show"...he didn't believe me...

So at pick up today dcb tells on him self and tells mom he's had a rough day...so I pick up where he left off and told her that it's been quiet a day...rehashing some of the things that have been going on...Mom breaks in with "Well, I think he just out grown daycare." -"Not that your not structured or anything...but, I think he's ready for preschool now." Oh, I totally agree!! dcb...he was proceeded to kick him mom while she tried putting on his shoes...yelling, pretty much acting how he's been all day...love that I am not the only one experiencing these things...mom said that dad will be hearing about this and there will be no movies before bed and if he keeps it up it will be for a couple of days..

Now, I've known for sometime that mom (teacher) wanted to put dcb into preschool but, he wasn't old enough and the cost was something to also consider. But, bc I am moving and she has noticed quiet a diff. in my rates verses others...preschool was found to now be a good option.

Preschool..I think it's a good thing for him...do I think he won't have the same issues at preschool verse daycare...Oh YEA!
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Kaddidle Care 06:56 PM 05-01-2012
They usually outgrow it between 5 & 6. You can watch them grow and transform and then the old routine just bores them.

At 3 - sorry - he's not outgrown Daycare he's just a spoiled brat. (did I just really say that?)

Mom needs to pull her head out of the sand. But alas.. it will be everyone else's fault as he grows.

Bye, bye little guy.
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Christian Mother 08:21 PM 05-01-2012
It would appear that way...but it's the opposite. He doesn't get enough attention at all. If anything I think guilt plays a factor as moms a teacher and dads a engineer. Both work a awful lot although mom gets summers off but she signs up each yr to work summer school and also works sat. I have the children 50 hrs a wk maybe a bit more. Mom had a baby 6 mos ago and I started watching little guy at 3 wks although it started with just one day a wk and eventually went full time at 12 wks. I started noticing his behavior becoming a real issue while mom was pregnant and mom really couldn't do anything bc she had miscarried with the 2nd pregnancy. She was trying to be careful. The family is very tall not fat but stocky and her son is huge. He would have no problem pushing her up against a wall. He doesn't demonstrate that behavior towards me as I don't allow him to touch me in any kind of inappropriate way. But I can tell it started off with her pushing him away and it escalated from there. He really just wants attention. I really think that if mom would cut out the donuts at 5am in the morning, stop bring mc'd's breakfast for him at 6:15am and let me feed him the only breakfast of the day which is always good for him we could begin to start off the day right and work on follow through on behavior it would be beneficial for him in the long run for when he enters into preschool. I won't say half the things I'd like to say bc I'm not a doctor or a specialist and I think that when school gets involved they'll have no problem waking her up to some of the issues I'm having with him. Like I really think he has ADHD or even mildly autistic. I know that sounds really extreme but I've had him since he was 3 months also...I pick up on quiet a few things but those of things I don't feel conferable addressing with her.
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Kaddidle Care 04:34 AM 05-02-2012
It makes me think of that story circulating the emails where the father is told his son has ADD and he misunderstands and starts spending more time with his son and the child reacts positively.

This little guy is smart enough to realize that you can't take away things at home. Mom may say she's taking it away in front of you but he already knows she won't.

3 year olds.. sigh.. much worse than 2. I like them 4 and up!
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Christian Mother 07:33 AM 05-02-2012
Exactly!!

And today for breakfast...McD's again...

Sigh.....
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cheerfuldom 10:12 AM 05-02-2012
Thats awful. I wonder why she even had a second when it sounds like she is working more like 60 hours a week. I bet she brings home a ton of stuff too, most teachers do. Thats just really sad. I hope she gets a clue soon.
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Texasjeepgirl 10:29 AM 05-02-2012
Originally Posted by Kaddidle Care:
They usually outgrow it between 5 & 6. You can watch them grow and transform and then the old routine just bores them.

At 3 - sorry - he's not outgrown Daycare he's just a spoiled brat. (did I just really say that?)

Mom needs to pull her head out of the sand. But alas.. it will be everyone else's fault as he grows.

Bye, bye little guy.
I think 5 or 6 also...but...then again.. I think sometimes..it can depend on the child...
I have a young man.. kept him in my daycare from the time he was 2...until he went to school... then it was school holiday.. summer care...
The summer he was 6.. I told his mom it was time for him to move on... he is too old for this group... She was sad.. he was sad...this kid just loved me...and I loved him.. he was MOSTLY GOOD... but ADD and sometimes he could get wild... not too bad.. I really never had any MAJOR issues with him at all..
Well.. that was the year she was pregnant with baby sister...
so.. when the following summer came.. I knew he'd want to be here with baby sis.. kind of keep an eye on her so to speak.. so I let him return for one more summer...and... at the end of that summer.. I said.. NO MORE... next summer he needs to go somewhere for big kids...
and he did... Baby sis is 2 now...and the love of my daycare... (besides my own granddaughter)... and I see him every afternoon when he and mom arrive to pick her up.. I still love him... he's 9 now..

Next case...
Two brothers... little one is 4.. almost 5..
I would keep him again this summer...but.. I won't keep the older brother.. 5.. almost 6...
I love both of them...and they are the cutest boys...
I started keeping the older one when he was 4 months old...
but last summer nearly KILLED ME... they are 1 year apart...and they are WILD...they wrestle.. they push and shove each other... the dynamics of siblings can be brutal sometimes... being together all day.. and all night.. it's too much...
mom found a place that is a facility... both boys will go...
so when school is out.. I loose the 4 year old too..

and.. last but not least...
Little girl..
Started keeping her when she was 6 weeks old.. she just turned 7 in April...
Last summer she only came part time...
she is old enough now that she also goes to summer camps... cheerleading camp... basketball camp.. zoo camp... She was with me for school holidays during the school year...
and.. she will be coming this summer.. part time around her camp schedule again..
She is weird.. she is cute.. she is absolutely the SMARTEST CHILD I have ever kept in 20 years... but again.. WEIRD WEIRD WEIRD...LOL... If you've ever noticed.. the one's with super IQ's are often very different individuals...
I love her... I look forward to every time she attends.. and.. I will probably keep the child until she is grown.. lol.. as long as they keep asking me...
The last time she came for a day.. my part time assistant asked me if I was ever going to 'kick her out for her age'.. (because of no longer keeping the boys listed above) and I said....no.. never...

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Christian Mother 09:10 AM 05-03-2012
How cute Texas!! Sounds like you have quiet a bit of older little ones..mine are all around the same age. 2 1/2 - 3yrs.

The little guy I was talking about just turned 3 yrs end of March. So he pretty new to being 3 yrs. He smart and has a good vocabulary specially with mom being a speech pathologist. I absolutely love this little guy...I did talk to mom yesterday also about behavior bc it hasn't gotten better and I explained to her that preschool is going to be quiet diff. then daycare. He is going to be exspected to do quiet a bit more then daycare. I feel like I prepare them for that next phase in there life. Here they learn all the numbers, letter, letter sounds, shapes. I even have this little guy doing math. He's 3...lol!! But what smarts he's got he lacks in control..does that make since. He doesn't seem to have a lot of control of his body. He a loud child and although we try hard on being gentle...sometimes he is just goofy and clumsy...I think it all is in development which he hasn't reached yet. In a couple yrs perhaps less he'll be there I am confident. I do think though he needs preschool. He needs the socialization skills quiet a bit. He has a real hard time fitting in w/the other children. For being so smart he has a hard time really playing well or making good long lasting friendships. It's hard to explain bc although the kids are here and they play together...the kids have a hard time playing with him bc he can't seem to get along with them or visa versa. He likes to pick on them and thinks it's funny...
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Tags:bored at daycare, outgrowing daycare, preschool, too old for daycare
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