So I have this dcm who seems bipolar lately and it's driving me nuts!

First it started off as her telling me my house was cold all the time. I vented a wk ago about this. She is the only parent that complains and I am usually in just a long sleeve shirt.

So last Friday she calls to see how many diapers she wet and what she ate because she threw up. Well it was 4 hours after she left my daycare so what makes her think it's due to me?

Then the other day she invites me to dinner as a Thank you for everything so I think ok, I'm just being sensative.

Welllllll
Last night she calls again. DCG threw up again, 4 hours after she left my daycare. Supposedly the girl threw up in Grandma's mouth and they think it tasted like coffee. What?? I would not give an infant coffee.

Then she ask what she ate. Well she had raisin toast with extra raisins and milk for breakfast. Cheeseburger skillet and bread for lunch. Then we were at a field trip so she shared a snack size bag of cheese its with another infant and then for snack a handful of pretzels and dcm states "Ah, nothing but junk food thats why" Ok yes, cheese its are junk but pretzels, raisins, meat no they are not.

Also, Friday we are going on a field trip to chuck e cheese. She ask me to s*****e everything before she uses it. Ummmm no. I will sanitize her hands after but not the rides . Then she makes a comment that the child will not be able to nap. She is nearly two so not a big deal if she misses an afternoon nap in my opinion. This is also the mom that I spoke about in another thread about her wanting her daughter to sleep more.

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I would have them bring ALL of her food COMPLETELY ready to serve. Meaning... you just remove from her lunch pack and serve directly. They are to do ALL of the peeling, chopping, dicing, etc. Everything needs to be ready to serve WITHOUT any heating or ANY preparation every day.

Just put in front of her and toss the garbage or containers beck into her lunch box.

Once they know that they will do EVERYTHING every day they will find out what she really can and can't have. Have them do breakfast at home so all you do is their lunch and their snack. Have them supply her drink in a cup ready to serve so that you can return to them anything she is not eating or drinking. That way they aren't asking you daily what she is and isn't eating. All they have to do is look in the lunch box.

They will tire of it really quickly. Make sure you are clear that you will not do ANY food prep and no more conferences on her eating. You have ONE instruction and that is to ONLY give her food from their lunch box and return anything unused in that box.

Regarding field trip: Tell her she is welcome to come get her at nap time so she can take her home to nap her. Tell her she doesn't have to decide now but feel free to show up at any time you are at Chuckies and she can spirit her away for a nice long nap at home.

Stop taking her phone calls after work. If it is a life threatening emergency return the call.

I don't even want to know how she puked in grandmas mouth.

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I can't get over the grandma thing, omg that is so gross. Is mom feeding her chocolate when she picks her up. I would question her what is she getting when she leaves your house.

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In regards to the food issue... I wouldn't have been offended the first time she called to see what her dd had eaten that day. Some children become sensitive to certain foods, and that can make them throw up. No problem there.

When she made the comment that she threw up because it was all junk, I definitely would've been offended. I probably would've wanted to tell her "Look, I spend a lot of time and effort to make sure your daughter and the others eat balanced, healthy meals and snacks while they are here. All of the foods I fed her today with the exception of cheezits are recommended by the food program. I don't appreciate comments like that."

When she said her dd's throw up tasted like coffee; I would've been fuming! And asking you to sanitize everything her daughter touches at Chuck E Cheeses is absolutely ridiculous.

She is a very controlling person. She wants to control EVERYTHING. She wants to even control your thermostat for goodness saks! As far as the food issue goes, I would give her that control. Make her pack all of her meals and snacks. Send all leftovers home so she can see how much she has eaten/drank. As far as the field trip issue goes; just tell her if she is not comfortable with her being exposed to germs or missing her nap; she doesn't have to go. But she needs to find alternate care for that day, and she'll still have to pay for the day.

If her need to control everything continues, I would give notice. I would say that you cannot possible provide the care she is looking for; and she would probably be better off hiring a nanny at her home so that she can dictate everything that goes on.

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This arrangement will eventually end....it is probably for the best. Go ahead and put the word out that you have an opening or start looking over your waiting list for who is the best fit.

In the mean time ask the mommy to supply food. Ask her to supply a box of sanitizing wipes that suit her preference and ask her to supply plastic gloves like the lunch ladies wear. (......and maybe a hairnet and germ mask?! Just kidding!)

Good Luck!

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I picture grandma savoring the barf..."do I taste...coffee?" That's insane!

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I bet I know how dcg threw up in Gma's mouth and I bet it is the same reason dcg threw up in the first place...

Can't you just picture Grandma holding dear baby over her head, tossing and jiggling her around to get a giggle...when suddenly dcg pukes on her face! Uhhmmm...maybe one shouldn't bounce around a newly fed kid while holding her by her middle section, especially when holding said child above your FACE! Duhhhh...

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this is exactly what I was picturing.

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Yep, my DH caught my nephew's puke in his mouth exactly that way when my nephew was one. One too many "weeeeee's" over the head.

I agree with the person who said start looking into a replacement. Once I feel a parent doesn't trust me with her child (or any other aspect of the business is treated disrespectfully), it's time for a change to parents who appreciate all the things you do for all of the children in care. A nanny is looking like the best alternative for this family. Who knows? They may already be interviewing other providers.

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I like to pull the rug out from under people like that. I just say, "Wow, you sure are complaining a lot. Did you have a bad day or something? Sheesh."
And ignore the requests. That will make her get huffy, to which you say, "Oh, you were SERIOUS? No, that's not going to happen, I'm sorry." And carry on about my day.

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Thanks for the suggestions!

Dcm sent a text today that said the girl was feeling better. I replied... Thats good. Like I said I would guess it had something to do with eating and motion sickness.

The only way I can imagine (gag) a child puking in ones mouth would be if they were playing with the child in the air. Then to "taste like coffee". I just don't believe that. First off... who taste puke?? Not for TMI but it's not going to taste the same as when it went down and also who is not going to puke when they have puke in thier mouth? Also mom called me at 7pm so I would assume she had just eaten dinner with Grandma and they were playing.

Also, this was 4 hours after the child was picked up. I'm pretty sure had I been dumb enough to give her coffee it would have digested, taste and all

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why would you give her coffee anyway?
who wants a caffeinated 2 year old?

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OMG I know! The only thing I can think of is that 2 weeks ago dcm brought me and herself a Mocha Frappe from McD's. Well mom gave the child some of it. And another child in care. The children would not sleep all day and they were aweful like little chipmunks. Well I didn't realize there was real coffee in it
So maybe because of this??? But it was technically her that did it.

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the people you see at the mall pouring a 20 oz of diet pepsi or mountain dew into their very young child's bottle.

Not kidding, I've seen it.

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