Daycare.com Forum Force of Nature Disinfectant

Go Back   Daycare.com Forum > Main Category > Daycare Center and Family Home Forum

Daycare Center and Family Home Forum Daycare Center and Family Home owners, Directors, Operators and Assistants should post and ask questions here.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 12-22-2010, 01:50 PM
sahm2three's Avatar
sahm2three sahm2three is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,113
Default A Lying 2 Year Old?

I have had no issues with my own children lying (I have always said they are too honest for their own good). This little dcb lies about everything. I usually have 5 in diapers, he is one of them. If I walk into the room and say, "oooh, someones poopy" he says, "not me, its X" And it is him. He will lie and say X hit him when I saw the whole thing and what actually happened is that he took a toy from X and X started crying so he turns it around to say that THEY hit HIM. I can't think of anything else at the moment. He is also really aggressive, but only if he thinks I am not watching. So he knows already to hide things. Is this normal 2 year old behavior?!
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 12-22-2010, 02:04 PM
SilverSabre25's Avatar
SilverSabre25 SilverSabre25 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Where I am legally unlicensed ;), USA
Posts: 7,625
Default

I would say that it's a defense mechanism--and a reflection on the way he gets treated at home or elsewhere when he's caught doing "wrong" (not that at his age there's much that's truly "wrong", iykwim).

A 2 year old is not capable of purposefully concealing the truth--but they are capable of telling what they wish had happened, or what they know the adult wants to hear, or, in these cases, what they know will NOT get them in trouble. "Truth" is a fluid concept for them, and it will be until early elementary school.

As for doing things only when he thinks you're not looking--I'd say that's pretty normal. Mine has done it all along! But again, I think it probably reflects a lot on how he gets treated at home.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 12-22-2010, 02:22 PM
sahm2three's Avatar
sahm2three sahm2three is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,113
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25 View Post
I would say that it's a defense mechanism--and a reflection on the way he gets treated at home or elsewhere when he's caught doing "wrong" (not that at his age there's much that's truly "wrong", iykwim).

A 2 year old is not capable of purposefully concealing the truth--but they are capable of telling what they wish had happened, or what they know the adult wants to hear, or, in these cases, what they know will NOT get them in trouble. "Truth" is a fluid concept for them, and it will be until early elementary school.

As for doing things only when he thinks you're not looking--I'd say that's pretty normal. Mine has done it all along! But again, I think it probably reflects a lot on how he gets treated at home.
This does make a lot of sense. He is living with mom, who I think is over indulgant, and spends time at dad's house, who is fed up with the kids behavior and goes over the top, in my opinion. I feel bad for the kid, but at the same time, lying is something that I can't stand. Of course, I know he is only 2, but I guess that is why it alarmed me. I have never experienced a child lying at this age. He is so sneaky. He will look at me out of the corner of his eye to see if I am watching him, and if he doesn't think I am, he will shove one of the smaller kids down, or take a toy away. I am forever telling him to give back the toy he took from this person or that. Taking toys is a normal behavior. I guess I am just worn out and ready for a long weekend.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 12-22-2010, 02:34 PM
SilverSabre25's Avatar
SilverSabre25 SilverSabre25 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Where I am legally unlicensed ;), USA
Posts: 7,625
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by sahm2three View Post
This does make a lot of sense. He is living with mom, who I think is over indulgant, and spends time at dad's house, who is fed up with the kids behavior and goes over the top, in my opinion. I feel bad for the kid, but at the same time, lying is something that I can't stand. Of course, I know he is only 2, but I guess that is why it alarmed me. I have never experienced a child lying at this age. He is so sneaky. He will look at me out of the corner of his eye to see if I am watching him, and if he doesn't think I am, he will shove one of the smaller kids down, or take a toy away. I am forever telling him to give back the toy he took from this person or that. Taking toys is a normal behavior. I guess I am just worn out and ready for a long weekend.
When you see him looking at you out of the corner of his eye, I would give him one of those "mom voice" warnings--the name, drawn out in a low voice so he KNOWS you see him. Make him start to think that you really do have eyes in the back of your head! You could start intervening as soon as you see that look, too. Distract him, move him, etc. I do this with a couple of mine who are "sneaky" and it seems to work wonders.

He's old enough to start getting time outs, too--he takes a toy, he gives it back and gets a warning that if he does it again, it's a time out. He shoves someone down, he gets a time out.

HUGS--it sounds like he's a difficult kid who's really wearing on your nerves. The week's more than half over. Hang in there!
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 12-22-2010, 03:31 PM
DBug DBug is offline
Daycare Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 934
Default

I have the exact same kid . My own sons were like this too, so it's perfectly normal. My favourite way of dealing with it is to stay out of sight and watch them until they are about to do something, or even when they get that look in their eye, and then say their name sharply or say something like " ***, don't even think about it!" in a drawn-out way. It makes them start to think you've got eyes in the back of your head , and they do start to rethink a lot of the sneaky behaviours.

You have to be hyper-vigilant with this kind of kid, and it's exhausting (thank goodness mine is only 3 days/week!). But they can also be the sweetest kids ever. Good luck!
__________________
www.WelcomeToTheZoo.ca
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 12-22-2010, 05:59 PM
kendallina's Avatar
kendallina kendallina is online now
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Ohio
Posts: 1,657
Default

SilverSabre, you always say what I want to say before I get a chance to say it!!! Anyways, yeh, I agree with SilverSabre.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 12-22-2010, 08:13 PM
ninosqueridos's Avatar
ninosqueridos ninosqueridos is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 419
Default

It may be "normal" but can definitely be detrimental to you and your family. I termed a child (2 1/2) b/c all this child did all day was make up things (physical things) that happened. Child would look straight at me and say "you SCRATCHED me!" while pointing to the scratch from cat at home ....or "you PUSHED me!" when child was 10 feet away and tripped on rug. Problem was dcp believed child. Adios!
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 12-22-2010, 08:42 PM
SilverSabre25's Avatar
SilverSabre25 SilverSabre25 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Where I am legally unlicensed ;), USA
Posts: 7,625
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by kendallina View Post
SilverSabre, you always say what I want to say before I get a chance to say it!!! Anyways, yeh, I agree with SilverSabre.
Sorry! At least we seem to think the same way. We should meet up sometime, lol.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 12-22-2010, 08:44 PM
SilverSabre25's Avatar
SilverSabre25 SilverSabre25 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Where I am legally unlicensed ;), USA
Posts: 7,625
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ninosqueridos View Post
It may be "normal" but can definitely be detrimental to you and your family. I termed a child (2 1/2) b/c all this child did all day was make up things (physical things) that happened. Child would look straight at me and say "you SCRATCHED me!" while pointing to the scratch from cat at home ....or "you PUSHED me!" when child was 10 feet away and tripped on rug. Problem was dcp believed child. Adios!
I find the best thing to do in those cases is remind the child what the truth really is. They really don't have any sort of grasp on fiction/nonfiction or reality/pretend. When my DD was doing this, I guess it didn't even register because I just would automatically tell her, no, that's a kitty scratch. Or, he wasn't anywhere near you, you just tripped.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 12-22-2010, 11:39 PM
QualiTcare's Avatar
QualiTcare QualiTcare is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 1,484
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25 View Post
I would say that it's a defense mechanism--and a reflection on the way he gets treated at home or elsewhere when he's caught doing "wrong" (not that at his age there's much that's truly "wrong", iykwim).

A 2 year old is not capable of purposefully concealing the truth--but they are capable of telling what they wish had happened, or what they know the adult wants to hear, or, in these cases, what they know will NOT get them in trouble. "Truth" is a fluid concept for them, and it will be until early elementary school.

As for doing things only when he thinks you're not looking--I'd say that's pretty normal. Mine has done it all along! But again, I think it probably reflects a lot on how he gets treated at home.
does he have an older sibling/siblings? my sisters still joke about how they blamed EVERYTHING on me when i was too young to defend myself. they realized they screwed up when they used paint to write WORDS on the basement wall and said, "QualiT did it" and of course i couldn't spell, read, or write anything.

my daughter did the same thing to my son who is younger than her. it didn't last as long as my sister's scheme bc they're closer in age. still, he could be getting old enough to recognize when something happens that his siblings put the blame on someone else. that may be his normal.
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 12-23-2010, 09:37 AM
MARSTELAC's Avatar
MARSTELAC MARSTELAC is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Somewhere cold
Posts: 279
Default 4 yo lying to other dcp

Just had a 4 yo dc kid tell another daycare parent that my dog bit another child. I am so upset! My dog is so tame and has never bitten another child and if it did, the dog would be history. How to handle this one please???? Mom will be here shortly to pick up for school. Would love to know what to say to her....
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
2 year old, fibber, lying

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Toilet Trained to Move into the 3 Year Old Room? Cindy Parents and Guardians Forum 28 12-11-2014 05:23 AM
DCP's looking for childcare for a year? SunshineMama Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 5 05-29-2012 12:26 PM
6 year Old Lying countrymom Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 11 02-16-2011 08:34 AM
One Year Olds Francine Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 2 07-01-2010 09:21 AM
Is it Legal to Charge for Full Year When Leaving a Program with Notice? Unregistered Parents and Guardians Forum 7 01-21-2010 10:11 AM


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 01:08 PM.



Daycare.com         Find A Daycare         List Your Daycare         Toys & Products                 About Us

Daycare.com
Please read our Disclaimer before continuing.

Topics pertain mainly to the following States:

Alabama Alaska Arizona Arkansas California Colorado Connecticut Delaware District of Columbia Florida Georgia Hawaii Idaho Illinois Indiana Iowa Kansas Kentucky Louisiana Maine Maryland Massachusetts Michigan Minnesota Mississippi Missouri Montana Nebraska Nevada New Hampshire New Jersey New Mexico New York North Carolina North Dakota Ohio Oklahoma Oregon Pennsylvania Rhode Island South Carolina South Dakota Tennessee Texas Utah Vermont Virginia Washington West Virginia Wisconsin Wyoming