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Old 03-20-2019, 05:52 AM
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morgan24 morgan24 is online now
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Default Crying 3 Year Old

I could use some fresh ideas on a 3 year old that cries everyday at drop off and for at least a 1/2 hour after and randomly through out the day. I have tried every trick I have, giving him a place to cry, ignoring it and putting him back to bed and some others. I have had him since August and he has only had a couple of days when he hasnít cried. I do know he is sleep deprived. He goes to bed when he feels like it and doesnít nap at home. He naps here everyday. In general he is an unhappy kid, he will sit around pouting when things donít go his way. I ignore it. Any suggestions or tricks that have worked for you will be appreciated.
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Old 03-20-2019, 07:20 AM
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Blackcat31 Blackcat31 is offline
 
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Originally Posted by morgan24 View Post
I could use some fresh ideas on a 3 year old that cries everyday at drop off and for at least a 1/2 hour after and randomly through out the day. I have tried every trick I have, giving him a place to cry, ignoring it and putting him back to bed and some others. I have had him since August and he has only had a couple of days when he hasnít cried. I do know he is sleep deprived. He goes to bed when he feels like it and doesnít nap at home. He naps here everyday. In general he is an unhappy kid, he will sit around pouting when things donít go his way. I ignore it. Any suggestions or tricks that have worked for you will be appreciated.
Every kid I've had with those issues all led back to sleep.

Three is also a tough age where it seems they toggle back and forth between being big and being little. Very emotional time.

As for your DCK, can you have him lay down immediately upon arrival so that he gets a bit of extra sleep before joining the others?

I would also not pay attention to the crying other than just providing him a place to cry where it won't annoy or bother the others. Every time he gets weepy for no reason, send him there without alot of discussion (he's not listening anyways) and have him come back as soon as he's done crying. Rinse and repeat. It's all you really can do.

I had to finally implement a practice of calling for pick up every time my crier cried more than 3x in a morning. It just got exhausting and I felt bad for the child as I knew it was all rooted in lack of sleep. The parents are the only ones that are able to "fix" this issue so eventually you have to give the issue back to them.
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Old 03-20-2019, 07:26 AM
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Have you tried talking with his parents about his sleep schedule at home? Do you know what time they put him to bed? Sleep deprived kids are hard to deal with so hopefully this gets resolved!
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Old 03-20-2019, 07:51 AM
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I agree it's a sleep issue! I have this kid too and it was getting to the point I dreaded him every day. I started putting him to bed as soon as he arrives. He doesn't always fall asleep, but he gets a few moments to reset and get ready for daycare without the craziness of the daycare kids. His parents do a poor job of preparing him beforehand as well and encourage the dramatics, so I started doing really quick drop offs and taking over for dcp so he doesn't have an audience. I immediately take his hand,say "bye dcd! Have a nice day!" and walk him out of sight. That helped tremendously as well.
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Old 03-20-2019, 07:54 AM
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Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
Every kid I've had with those issues all led back to sleep.

Three is also a tough age where it seems they toggle back and forth between being big and being little. Very emotional time.

As for your DCK, can you have him lay down immediately upon arrival so that he gets a bit of extra sleep before joining the others?

I would also not pay attention to the crying other than just providing him a place to cry where it won't annoy or bother the others. Every time he gets weepy for no reason, send him there without alot of discussion (he's not listening anyways) and have him come back as soon as he's done crying. Rinse and repeat. It's all you really can do.

I had to finally implement a practice of calling for pick up every time my crier cried more than 3x in a morning. It just got exhausting and I felt bad for the child as I knew it was all rooted in lack of sleep. The parents are the only ones that are able to "fix" this issue so eventually you have to give the issue back to them.
This is one of the toughest Iíve ever had. I just started back to bed in the morning. Iím hoping that works. I may have to do the call for pick up if it doesnít improve.
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Old 03-20-2019, 07:59 AM
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Iíve had plenty of discussions with his parents about his sleep and they agree he is sleep deprived but they still let him go to bed when he feels like it. He also wakes up multiple times in the night. His drop off is really quick so I at least have that going for me. Iím trying back to bed. Iíll see how that goes.
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Old 03-20-2019, 08:05 AM
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Iíve had plenty of discussions with his parents about his sleep and they agree he is sleep deprived but they still let him go to bed when he feels like it. He also wakes up multiple times in the night. His drop off is really quick so I at least have that going for me. Iím trying back to bed. Iíll see how that goes.
Set a date for needing to see improvement before termination.

Maybe if you share with parents that you are trying 'back to bed' (and/or calling for pick up if necessary) and you see no improvement by x date that you'll have to let him go.

Might be the kick in the butt parents need to start parenting.

Poor kid.
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Old 03-20-2019, 08:54 AM
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Set a date for needing to see improvement before termination.

Maybe if you share with parents that you are trying 'back to bed' (and/or calling for pick up if necessary) and you see no improvement by x date that you'll have to let him go.

Might be the kick in the butt parents need to start parenting.

Poor kid.
Thatís what Iím going to do. It is sad because when heís not crying, heís really a good kid to have.
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Old 03-20-2019, 09:50 AM
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While I definitely agree with sleeping issues being the main cause, there could be other traits or issues at play too. Does he get along with the other dcks, is he afraid, does he miss mom/dad, did he cry like this at his former caregiver's or are you his first? I think sensitive children can show similar signs of stress this way. I have a 2 1/2 yo dcg who I've had since she was an infant and she still cries at d/o or sometimes during the day when she thinks about her mom or Sissy. She just misses them and she is only 2 yo. I know she's comfortable here, she knows she is loved. So I have to be creative in finding distractions for her when momma drops her off, otherwise it sets the precedent for her day. She loves bubbles so when I get desperate we'll blow bubbles in the living room for the 10 mo.
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Old 03-20-2019, 09:51 AM
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They donít change at home because you are the one dealing with his moods. They need a kick in the rear so to speak and hopefully letting them know he is close to termination will help.
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Old 03-20-2019, 12:09 PM
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They donít change at home because you are the one dealing with his moods. They need a kick in the rear so to speak and hopefully letting them know he is close to termination will help.
You are 100% correct. They do want easy.
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Old 03-20-2019, 12:11 PM
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He got picked up early today. I asked about his sleep habits and he hasnít been sleeping very well at night. Dad is okay with him going back to bed and getting extra sleep.
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