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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>DCB Screams When I Pick Him Up From Nap
Symphony 01:17 PM 02-03-2011
This is making me crazy! DCB is 13 months and takes two naps a day. He is the first one awake of the kids who sleep at these times. So everyday, he takes his nap and when he wakes up he stands and fusses a bit. Doesn't cry, just little sounds to say, "I'm up!" Then as soon as he sees me, he SCREAMS bloody murder. This continues for a couple minutes after I've been holding him. Then he's totally fine again, happy, playing, himself! I don't get it and he's waking everyone up!
I've had him FT since he was 6wks, he is very attached, and mom says he has never done this at home. It has happened at almost every nap here for the last two weeks. He also did it for awhile at 9 months, but it stopped. Any ideas why or suggestions? Thanks!
I've had him FT since he was 6wks, he is very attached, and mom says he has never done this at home. It has happened at almost every nap here for the last two weeks. He also did it for awhile at 9 months, but it stopped. Any ideas why or suggestions? Thanks!
Symphony 01:31 PM 03-04-2011
A month later and I am still dealing with this. It is like he is being woken up with a hot poker.
Anybody????
Anybody????
PeanutsGalore 03:08 PM 03-04-2011
He's not acting like he's in pain, is he? My son is a bit fussy after naps, but not all the time. Mostly, it's if he hasn't finished his nap yet, and then he wakes up SCREAMING! I finally figured out that I needed to get him back to sleep quickly so he would wake up refreshed and happy. I suspect he has some reflux issues going on, but they're manageable so far.
Maybe this little one is developing some gastro issues? Has his diet changed at all in the last 6 weeks?
I wish I could be more help. Sorry you're dealing with this. This is the hardest job I've ever had...parents should kiss the ground we walk on that their kids are happy and healthy by the end of the day!
Maybe this little one is developing some gastro issues? Has his diet changed at all in the last 6 weeks?
I wish I could be more help.
Sorry you're dealing with this. This is the hardest job I've ever had...parents should kiss the ground we walk on that their kids are happy and healthy by the end of the day!
SilverSabre25 03:11 PM 03-04-2011
hmm, that's a weird one. I have several who get really fussy/cuddly/clingy after naps, but nothing quite like that.
Symphony 04:08 PM 03-04-2011
Thanks for the replies. I don't think he is in pain and I don't think it is medical...mom is a pediatrician and she is pretty on top of everything. But, he doesn't ever do it for her either. I guess it seems like if it were medical it would be constant, not just at my house, right?
It isn't exactly how he wakes up, it is just when he sees me come into the nap room. It is giving me a complex!
I kind of want to leave him when he starts screaming until he can come play calmly, but the time it takes me to get in and get him out of there is enough to practicualy get everyone else up anyway. If he were taking decent naps it wouldn't be such a big deal, but I'm lucky if I get two 30 minute ones out of him.
At home he sleeps in a crib and takes good naps. Here we sleep in pack n plays. Yesterday, I had him on the couch next to me when I was entering my lunch into the computer and he fell asleep. The other littles weren't here, so I just left him there. I watched a movie and he slept for over two hours!
I just don't know what to do. After that huge nap yesterday, I am wondering if he is just still tired. If I leave him though everyone else wakes up and then none of them go back to sleep
It isn't exactly how he wakes up, it is just when he sees me come into the nap room. It is giving me a complex!
I kind of want to leave him when he starts screaming until he can come play calmly, but the time it takes me to get in and get him out of there is enough to practicualy get everyone else up anyway. If he were taking decent naps it wouldn't be such a big deal, but I'm lucky if I get two 30 minute ones out of him.
At home he sleeps in a crib and takes good naps. Here we sleep in pack n plays. Yesterday, I had him on the couch next to me when I was entering my lunch into the computer and he fell asleep. The other littles weren't here, so I just left him there. I watched a movie and he slept for over two hours!
I just don't know what to do. After that huge nap yesterday, I am wondering if he is just still tired. If I leave him though everyone else wakes up and then none of them go back to sleep
treehugger82 04:31 PM 03-04-2011
Well, this is just my humble opinion but....my daugher and niece were the same way.
First, I would put him in a different room. Second, I would NOT go in there the minute he fusses, and if he saw me and started screaming, I would turn and walk out of the room. When he stops, maybe he will go back to sleep, or maybe he will learn to NOT scream when he sees you. If he screams again, walk out again. Even at this young age, I would look at my daughter or neice and calmly say "When you can stop screaming, you can come out. We don't scream." A lot of times they would cry for a minute, and then go back to sleep. If it is not medical, and he doesn't do this at home....I hate to say it, but it may be something he has become accustomed to at your house. Kids are VERY good at "training" adults, and then also even better at keeping the game going. It's really human nature, but as adults, most of us know acceptable limits (notice I said *most*, lol). He knows that you will quickly come and get him, and you feel like you have to b/c of the other kids. Put him in a different room and that problem is solved. Sounds to me like he is still tired and for some reason, maybe just knowing that there are other children in the room, he is over stimulated (or over tired) to the point where he cannot relax enough to get a good rest in. Add in the "game" he's got going here, and voila, no nap! I know not everyone is a fan of the cry it out method, but if it is to the point where he is not napping properly and you are losing your sanity, it's worth a shot.
Good luck!
First, I would put him in a different room. Second, I would NOT go in there the minute he fusses, and if he saw me and started screaming, I would turn and walk out of the room. When he stops, maybe he will go back to sleep, or maybe he will learn to NOT scream when he sees you. If he screams again, walk out again. Even at this young age, I would look at my daughter or neice and calmly say "When you can stop screaming, you can come out. We don't scream." A lot of times they would cry for a minute, and then go back to sleep. If it is not medical, and he doesn't do this at home....I hate to say it, but it may be something he has become accustomed to at your house. Kids are VERY good at "training" adults, and then also even better at keeping the game going. It's really human nature, but as adults, most of us know acceptable limits (notice I said *most*, lol). He knows that you will quickly come and get him, and you feel like you have to b/c of the other kids. Put him in a different room and that problem is solved. Sounds to me like he is still tired and for some reason, maybe just knowing that there are other children in the room, he is over stimulated (or over tired) to the point where he cannot relax enough to get a good rest in. Add in the "game" he's got going here, and voila, no nap! I know not everyone is a fan of the cry it out method, but if it is to the point where he is not napping properly and you are losing your sanity, it's worth a shot.
Good luck!
nannyde 04:33 PM 03-04-2011
Originally Posted by Symphony:
If he were taking decent naps it wouldn't be such a big deal, but I'm lucky if I get two 30 minute ones out of him.
If he were taking decent naps it wouldn't be such a big deal, but I'm lucky if I get two 30 minute ones out of him.
Yikes
He needs at least a two hour nap every day in the afternoon and a good hour or so in the morning.
Can you give him his own room? A baby that age needs a LOT of sleep. He doesn't even have time to get into deep sleep if he's getting up in a half hour.
Michael 04:36 PM 03-04-2011
Originally Posted by treehugger82:
Well, this is just my humble opinion but....my daugher and niece were the same way.
First, I would put him in a different room. Second, I would NOT go in there the minute he fusses, and if he saw me and started screaming, I would turn and walk out of the room. When he stops, maybe he will go back to sleep, or maybe he will learn to NOT scream when he sees you. If he screams again, walk out again. Even at this young age, I would look at my daughter or neice and calmly say "When you can stop screaming, you can come out. We don't scream." A lot of times they would cry for a minute, and then go back to sleep. If it is not medical, and he doesn't do this at home....I hate to say it, but it may be something he has become accustomed to at your house. Kids are VERY good at "training" adults, and then also even better at keeping the game going. It's really human nature, but as adults, most of us know acceptable limits (notice I said *most*, lol). He knows that you will quickly come and get him, and you feel like you have to b/c of the other kids. Put him in a different room and that problem is solved. Sounds to me like he is still tired and for some reason, maybe just knowing that there are other children in the room, he is over stimulated (or over tired) to the point where he cannot relax enough to get a good rest in. Add in the "game" he's got going here, and voila, no nap! I know not everyone is a fan of the cry it out method, but if it is to the point where he is not napping properly and you are losing your sanity, it's worth a shot.
Good luck!
Oh no, another Tree Hugger! Well, this is just my humble opinion but....my daugher and niece were the same way.
First, I would put him in a different room. Second, I would NOT go in there the minute he fusses, and if he saw me and started screaming, I would turn and walk out of the room. When he stops, maybe he will go back to sleep, or maybe he will learn to NOT scream when he sees you. If he screams again, walk out again. Even at this young age, I would look at my daughter or neice and calmly say "When you can stop screaming, you can come out. We don't scream." A lot of times they would cry for a minute, and then go back to sleep. If it is not medical, and he doesn't do this at home....I hate to say it, but it may be something he has become accustomed to at your house. Kids are VERY good at "training" adults, and then also even better at keeping the game going. It's really human nature, but as adults, most of us know acceptable limits (notice I said *most*, lol). He knows that you will quickly come and get him, and you feel like you have to b/c of the other kids. Put him in a different room and that problem is solved. Sounds to me like he is still tired and for some reason, maybe just knowing that there are other children in the room, he is over stimulated (or over tired) to the point where he cannot relax enough to get a good rest in. Add in the "game" he's got going here, and voila, no nap! I know not everyone is a fan of the cry it out method, but if it is to the point where he is not napping properly and you are losing your sanity, it's worth a shot.
Good luck!
Welcome to the Daycare.com Forum!
treehugger82 04:43 PM 03-04-2011
Originally Posted by Michael:
Oh no, another Tree Hugger! Welcome to the Daycare.com Forum!
Thank you!!Oh no, another Tree Hugger!
Welcome to the Daycare.com Forum!
kendallina 04:59 PM 03-04-2011
When my daughter (2 yrs old) wakes up in the morning she talks to herself and even fusses a little for quite a while. If I go in when she does this, she'll be really cranky for 10 minutes or so. But, when I wait until she starts saying, "mommy mommy" then she's in a super duper mood and we have no problems. I take it she just needs to kind of wake up herself a little and doesn't want to be bothered until she's ready. Sometimes she even falls back asleep for a little bit 
. I'd leave him there and see what happens. Good luck!
. I'd leave him there and see what happens. Good luck!
sahm2three 05:01 PM 03-04-2011
Originally Posted by treehugger82:
Well, this is just my humble opinion but....my daugher and niece were the same way.
First, I would put him in a different room. Second, I would NOT go in there the minute he fusses, and if he saw me and started screaming, I would turn and walk out of the room. When he stops, maybe he will go back to sleep, or maybe he will learn to NOT scream when he sees you. If he screams again, walk out again. Even at this young age, I would look at my daughter or neice and calmly say "When you can stop screaming, you can come out. We don't scream." A lot of times they would cry for a minute, and then go back to sleep. If it is not medical, and he doesn't do this at home....I hate to say it, but it may be something he has become accustomed to at your house. Kids are VERY good at "training" adults, and then also even better at keeping the game going. It's really human nature, but as adults, most of us know acceptable limits (notice I said *most*, lol). He knows that you will quickly come and get him, and you feel like you have to b/c of the other kids. Put him in a different room and that problem is solved. Sounds to me like he is still tired and for some reason, maybe just knowing that there are other children in the room, he is over stimulated (or over tired) to the point where he cannot relax enough to get a good rest in. Add in the "game" he's got going here, and voila, no nap! I know not everyone is a fan of the cry it out method, but if it is to the point where he is not napping properly and you are losing your sanity, it's worth a shot.
Good luck!
This! I agree! I would try to put him in his own room, and let him fuss. Good luck! Anything nap/sleep related is nightmarish to deal with!Well, this is just my humble opinion but....my daugher and niece were the same way.
First, I would put him in a different room. Second, I would NOT go in there the minute he fusses, and if he saw me and started screaming, I would turn and walk out of the room. When he stops, maybe he will go back to sleep, or maybe he will learn to NOT scream when he sees you. If he screams again, walk out again. Even at this young age, I would look at my daughter or neice and calmly say "When you can stop screaming, you can come out. We don't scream." A lot of times they would cry for a minute, and then go back to sleep. If it is not medical, and he doesn't do this at home....I hate to say it, but it may be something he has become accustomed to at your house. Kids are VERY good at "training" adults, and then also even better at keeping the game going. It's really human nature, but as adults, most of us know acceptable limits (notice I said *most*, lol). He knows that you will quickly come and get him, and you feel like you have to b/c of the other kids. Put him in a different room and that problem is solved. Sounds to me like he is still tired and for some reason, maybe just knowing that there are other children in the room, he is over stimulated (or over tired) to the point where he cannot relax enough to get a good rest in. Add in the "game" he's got going here, and voila, no nap! I know not everyone is a fan of the cry it out method, but if it is to the point where he is not napping properly and you are losing your sanity, it's worth a shot.
Good luck!
PeanutsGalore 05:01 PM 03-04-2011
Originally Posted by treehugger82:
Well, this is just my humble opinion but....my daugher and niece were the same way.
First, I would put him in a different room. ...
Good luck!
This. If he fell asleep when he was away from the other kids and on a comfy surface, I'd change his sleeping environment. Is it possible to get him a crib? Maybe his mom would like to get him one so he sleeps better? No matter, I'd change where he's sleeping so he has a more comfy and isolated napping experience. maybe he'll sleep for more than 30 minutes, and you'll be able to let him fuss for a few minutes without waking everyone else up, which may be all it takes for him to put himself back to sleep.Well, this is just my humble opinion but....my daugher and niece were the same way.
First, I would put him in a different room. ...
Good luck!
Symphony 05:24 PM 03-04-2011
I'll try and figure out where I can get him in an area by himself. My house has three levels, but the main one is the only one I am allowed to use for daycare, as the other two only do not have proper fire exits (we cannot have the only exits be up or down stairs). Anyway, my main level has a family room, kitchen and attached dining room, two daycare rooms that connect by three stairs, the foyer, laundry room with bathroom, and the living room which is my sleep area. The entire main level is open, the only door is to the bathroom. So I may have to get creative to try and find a seperate place for him to go.
Ok so working on the assumption that I am creative and figure out a second spot...I lay him down awake and he yells, sometimes cries for less than five minutes. Then he'll start fussing/crying about 30 minutes later. What is the best thing to do then? Go in and lay him down in his bed again? Ignore it until it has been a more appropriate time? How long before I give up and go get him?
Today I only had him and my own kids (most people only work and the schools are open open Mon-Thurs here), so this afternoon when he woke up, I went to get him and he started the screaming. I said, "Oh goodness I can't hold you when you are screaming" and I left the room again. He screamed like a banshee for about an hour, standing up the whole time, so I went and got him. Was that bad? Should I have stayed out?
Sorry for all the questions, I really appreciate the help!
Ok so working on the assumption that I am creative and figure out a second spot...I lay him down awake and he yells, sometimes cries for less than five minutes. Then he'll start fussing/crying about 30 minutes later. What is the best thing to do then? Go in and lay him down in his bed again? Ignore it until it has been a more appropriate time? How long before I give up and go get him?
Today I only had him and my own kids (most people only work and the schools are open open Mon-Thurs here), so this afternoon when he woke up, I went to get him and he started the screaming. I said, "Oh goodness I can't hold you when you are screaming" and I left the room again. He screamed like a banshee for about an hour, standing up the whole time, so I went and got him. Was that bad? Should I have stayed out?
Sorry for all the questions, I really appreciate the help!
snowborden1 06:23 PM 03-04-2011
First, I would put him in a different room. Second, I would NOT go in there the minute he fusses, and if he saw me and started screaming, I would turn and walk out of the room.
I have a little one who is 11 months who does the exact same thing. And he doesn't do it at home either. I will try this with him also! Thanks
I have a little one who is 11 months who does the exact same thing. And he doesn't do it at home either. I will try this with him also! Thanks
daysofelijah 06:33 PM 03-04-2011
My 12 month old dcg wakes up a half hour into nap time every day and starts screaming and crying. I wait 5-10 minutes to see if she will stop. If she doesn't stop I go in give her a bottle and then put her back in her crib and tell her to go back to sleep. Then I leave and if she fusses, she fusses.
She needs a 2 hour nap and I need a break. Usually she will go back to sleep within 20 minutes, but once in a while she will fuss and complain the whole rest of naptime. As long as she is fed, clean diaper and has had a busy time of play between her morning nap and afternoon nap she needs to sleep. She has a separate room from all the older kids so she doesn't wake them up.
She needs a 2 hour nap and I need a break. Usually she will go back to sleep within 20 minutes, but once in a while she will fuss and complain the whole rest of naptime. As long as she is fed, clean diaper and has had a busy time of play between her morning nap and afternoon nap she needs to sleep. She has a separate room from all the older kids so she doesn't wake them up.
PeanutsGalore 06:49 PM 03-04-2011
Originally Posted by Symphony:
I'll try and figure out where I can get him in an area by himself. My house has three levels, but the main one is the only one I am allowed to use for daycare, as the other two only do not have proper fire exits (we cannot have the only exits be up or down stairs). Anyway, my main level has a family room, kitchen and attached dining room, two daycare rooms that connect by three stairs, the foyer, laundry room with bathroom, and the living room which is my sleep area. The entire main level is open, the only door is to the bathroom. So I may have to get creative to try and find a seperate place for him to go.
Ok so working on the assumption that I am creative and figure out a second spot...I lay him down awake and he yells, sometimes cries for less than five minutes. Then he'll start fussing/crying about 30 minutes later. What is the best thing to do then? Go in and lay him down in his bed again? Ignore it until it has been a more appropriate time? How long before I give up and go get him?
Today I only had him and my own kids (most people only work and the schools are open open Mon-Thurs here), so this afternoon when he woke up, I went to get him and he started the screaming. I said, "Oh goodness I can't hold you when you are screaming" and I left the room again. He screamed like a banshee for about an hour, standing up the whole time, so I went and got him. Was that bad? Should I have stayed out?
Sorry for all the questions, I really appreciate the help!
If he had only slept for a few minutes and you think he wasn't done napping yet, then yes, stay out. Let him fuss for awhile, and somewhere in between 5 and 30 minutes, he should be asleep again if he's tired. But you should be kind of sure that he is actually tired, and not just asking you to come get him. If you are letting him CIO in order to teach him not to scream anymore, then you do not respond to the screaming at all. If he sees you and screams, walk away and say something gently..."use your indoor voice...we do not scream in this house...." something. Wait for a lull--a quiet breath, or wait until he calms down a bit. It might require standing near the door so you can get in the room as soon as he calms down but before he starts up again, but it's worth it. I think the CIO approach should work for him because this is a sudden aberration in his behavior, and not a natural part of his temperament.I'll try and figure out where I can get him in an area by himself. My house has three levels, but the main one is the only one I am allowed to use for daycare, as the other two only do not have proper fire exits (we cannot have the only exits be up or down stairs). Anyway, my main level has a family room, kitchen and attached dining room, two daycare rooms that connect by three stairs, the foyer, laundry room with bathroom, and the living room which is my sleep area. The entire main level is open, the only door is to the bathroom. So I may have to get creative to try and find a seperate place for him to go.
Ok so working on the assumption that I am creative and figure out a second spot...I lay him down awake and he yells, sometimes cries for less than five minutes. Then he'll start fussing/crying about 30 minutes later. What is the best thing to do then? Go in and lay him down in his bed again? Ignore it until it has been a more appropriate time? How long before I give up and go get him?
Today I only had him and my own kids (most people only work and the schools are open open Mon-Thurs here), so this afternoon when he woke up, I went to get him and he started the screaming. I said, "Oh goodness I can't hold you when you are screaming" and I left the room again. He screamed like a banshee for about an hour, standing up the whole time, so I went and got him. Was that bad? Should I have stayed out?
Sorry for all the questions, I really appreciate the help!
SandeeAR 06:55 AM 03-05-2011
I have one I keep in my bedroom, the rest are in a room by themselves. She cries the second I start to lay her down. I tell her nite-nite and walk out.
For morning nap: She cries herself to sleep, usually about 10 min. Sleeps for 20 minutes, cries for 10 min. and sleeps for twenty. Gets an hour in bed.
For afternoon nap: She cries herself to sleep, usually about 10 min. Sleeps for 20 minutes, cries for 10 min. and sleeps for twenty, cries for 10 min, sleeps for an hour. Gets 2 hours in bed.
She ALWAYS wakes up screaming. She wakes up in a panic, EVERYTIME. When I pick her up, I tell her to hush, or I'm putting her back down.
She is now 11 months old. She has done this since she was a little bab, she has NEVER been a good solid sleeper and ALWAYS has screamed.
For morning nap: She cries herself to sleep, usually about 10 min. Sleeps for 20 minutes, cries for 10 min. and sleeps for twenty. Gets an hour in bed.
For afternoon nap: She cries herself to sleep, usually about 10 min. Sleeps for 20 minutes, cries for 10 min. and sleeps for twenty, cries for 10 min, sleeps for an hour. Gets 2 hours in bed.
She ALWAYS wakes up screaming. She wakes up in a panic, EVERYTIME. When I pick her up, I tell her to hush, or I'm putting her back down.
She is now 11 months old. She has done this since she was a little bab, she has NEVER been a good solid sleeper and ALWAYS has screamed.
QualiTcare 08:19 AM 03-05-2011
can the "other room" be in a pnp in the room you're in?
you said he slept fine the day he slept near you.
i had a kid who slept in a pnp in the room i was in for the same reasons and i had no problems. he would still wake up sometimes, but as long as i was there where he could see me, he'd lie still and go back to sleep. if i were to get up and leave the room, he'd immediately jump up and start screaming. not the ideal situation, but it was better than leaving him to scream his head off and/or wake everyone else up.
it can't hurt to try.
you said he slept fine the day he slept near you.
i had a kid who slept in a pnp in the room i was in for the same reasons and i had no problems. he would still wake up sometimes, but as long as i was there where he could see me, he'd lie still and go back to sleep. if i were to get up and leave the room, he'd immediately jump up and start screaming. not the ideal situation, but it was better than leaving him to scream his head off and/or wake everyone else up.
it can't hurt to try.
Symphony 06:11 AM 03-07-2011
Ok ladies I have a plan...There just isn't a way I can give him a seperate room, but I realized that he is my only one who still really needs two naps here. The other two are fine napping with the after lunch crew. So, I'm going to change it that way, moving the other kids out. So wish me luck!
DCMomOf3 06:12 AM 03-07-2011
Let us know how today goes. 
Symphony 05:37 PM 03-07-2011
Well it didn't go well. Both morning and afternoon he slept 30 minutes and then woke up and screamed his head off for the next hour and a half. Never even layed back down. Morning nap I got him up because it was lunch time. Afternoon nap I got him because it was time to go outside.
So I still don't know what to do. Keep letting him scream for an hour and a half?
So I still don't know what to do. Keep letting him scream for an hour and a half?
SilverSabre25 05:39 PM 03-07-2011
Any chance he's ready to give up the morning nap?
Symphony 05:43 PM 03-07-2011
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25:
Any chance he's ready to give up the morning nap?
No. I actually tried that a couple weeks ago with Mom's ok, and he fell asleep on the floor around 9:30 and then again at 4:30. No dice...He sleeps from 8-5 at night so he really needs much more sleep than he is getting here. Any chance he's ready to give up the morning nap?
SilverSabre25 05:46 PM 03-07-2011
Hmmm, I really don't know. I don't think it's okay to let him scream for so long, but I don't have any suggestions for you. Is he too hot/cold, maybe? Does he not like where he's sleeping? Maybe try a different bed? Do you use white noise at all while the kiddos sleep? (these may have been asked before, I don't remember. Sorry if they were)
Sorry if they were)
treehugger82 05:58 PM 03-07-2011
Originally Posted by Symphony:
Well it didn't go well. Both morning and afternoon he slept 30 minutes and then woke up and screamed his head off for the next hour and a half. Never even layed back down. Morning nap I got him up because it was lunch time. Afternoon nap I got him because it was time to go outside.
So I still don't know what to do. Keep letting him scream for an hour and a half?
Wow, so sorry you and he are going through thisWell it didn't go well. Both morning and afternoon he slept 30 minutes and then woke up and screamed his head off for the next hour and a half. Never even layed back down. Morning nap I got him up because it was lunch time. Afternoon nap I got him because it was time to go outside.
So I still don't know what to do. Keep letting him scream for an hour and a half?
.I know with my dd and niece there were times when it seemed to get worse before it got better. They were both very strong willed little ones, plus I let it get out of hand, just wanting a break and accomodating their erratic nap schedules for a while, but it ended up biting me in the backside! An hour and a half is a long time. Maybe set a time limit, based on your gut feelings and go get him after that. It is a process sometimes. Wish I had better advice for you!