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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>I Am One Of Those People....
williams2008 12:13 PM 06-07-2013
I am now one of those people who have a dcm who wants to stick around and talk for 30 min or more. I have flat out ignored the dcm numereous of times to let her know that I do not want to sit up and talk to her. How in the world do I get rid of this problem???

Yesterday she was here for a whole 45 minutes, this morning she stayed for at least 20 minutes. I do not want to be mean because sometimes I have no filter, but enough is enough!!
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EntropyControlSpecialist 12:14 PM 06-07-2013
"I'm sorry, but I have to go and tend to the children! Please feel free to e-mail me and I will respond back as soon as I am able to! "
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williams2008 12:18 PM 06-07-2013
Originally Posted by EntropyControlSpecialist:
"I'm sorry, but I have to go and tend to the children! Please feel free to e-mail me and I will respond back as soon as I am able to! "
That is a good one! She is one of them you have to literally push out the door and lock it behind her!
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Meyou 12:27 PM 06-07-2013
I find telling the kids, "Let's all say goodbye to DCG's mommy so she can start her day!" works pretty well. I use it daily. lol The chanting toddlers crowding her out the door does the rest.
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MyAngels 12:34 PM 06-07-2013
"Are you all ready to go, DCG? I know mommy has had a long day and really wants to get you home now!" Works well at the end of the day, too, said while ushering them both to the door
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Blackcat31 12:53 PM 06-07-2013
I say take advantage of the fact you have no filter. I don't either when it comes to stuff like this.

The last mom I had here who lingered a bit too long and a bit too often got this:

"Mom, as much as I enjoy talking to my clients, I can't stand here all day so it is time for you to go. now. Bye" and then I physically usher them out the door.

Rude? I don't think so...maybe on her part for not taking the hint but seriously some people need "clear black and white, no options directions".

I have 12 different families. If I chatted only 5 minutes with each family at drop off and again at pick up every day for a week, I would have "chatted" for 10 hours. Nope. Not going to happen.
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williams2008 12:57 PM 06-07-2013
Originally Posted by Meyou:
I find telling the kids, "Let's all say goodbye to DCG's mommy so she can start her day!" works pretty well. I use it daily. lol The chanting toddlers crowding her out the door does the rest.
The kids are always telling her bye and she just goes on and on and on. I carry on like she is not here. I be saying to myself get out already!!!!
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williams2008 01:39 PM 06-07-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I say take advantage of the fact you have no filter. I don't either when it comes to stuff like this.

The last mom I had here who lingered a bit too long and a bit too often got this:

"Mom, as much as I enjoy talking to my clients, I can't stand here all day so it is time for you to go. now. Bye" and then I physically usher them out the door.

Rude? I don't think so...maybe on her part for not taking the hint but seriously some people need "clear black and white, no options directions".

I have 12 different families. If I chatted only 5 minutes with each family at drop off and again at pick up every day for a week, I would have "chatted" for 10 hours. Nope. Not going to happen.
I think it is very rude on her part to wanna hang around. I have already told her she is not the only person that drops off/pick up here, so please stop the driveway.
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williams2008 01:42 PM 06-07-2013
Originally Posted by MyAngels:
"Are you all ready to go, DCG? I know mommy has had a long day and really wants to get you home now!" Works well at the end of the day, too, said while ushering them both to the door
The child is constantly saying "I'm ready to go mommy" and trying to open the door. She just stands there running her mouth
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EntropyControlSpecialist 01:55 PM 06-07-2013
Originally Posted by williams2008:
That is a good one! She is one of them you have to literally push out the door and lock it behind her!
Oh, I've actually said that and I've actually DONE that (well, shutting the gate that gates off the daycare rooms behind me!). I just smile, smile, smile and give a happy wave!

Seriously, say bye and walk away or say bye while opening the front door and kind of crowding her out.
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KIDZRMYBIZ 02:27 PM 06-07-2013
When I have a parent that wants to hang around, I suddenly switch up our schedule and story time turns into whatever their drop-off/pick-up time is. It clearly demonstrates that a long-winded conversation is not going to happen!
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williams2008 03:44 PM 06-07-2013
Originally Posted by KMK:
When I have a parent that wants to hang around, I suddenly switch up our schedule and story time turns into whatever their drop-off/pick-up time is. It clearly demonstrates that a long-winded conversation is not going to happen!
I wish that would work!

I guess I forgot to mention that we were starting circle time this morning when she dropped off and decided to hang around for the extra 20 min
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MyAngels 03:47 PM 06-07-2013
Originally Posted by williams2008:
The child is constantly saying "I'm ready to go mommy" and trying to open the door. She just stands there running her mouth
Yikes . Then you're going to have to be very direct, like BC said. Hopefully that'll take care of it. I must have a "get the heck out" vibe because I never have anyone hang around to chat unless I initiate it for some reason .
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Thetotspot 06:35 PM 06-07-2013
"Johnny, we better say bye to Mom, she has a busy day ahead of her and doesn't want to be late." I wave goodbye to parent and take child, walk away, and engage in an activity.

At pickup, stay engaged with other children, makes it harder to become the target of a lingerer.
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Laurel 05:09 AM 06-08-2013
Originally Posted by williams2008:
I wish that would work!

I guess I forgot to mention that we were starting circle time this morning when she dropped off and decided to hang around for the extra 20 min
Instead of circle time how about musical instrument time?

Nothing like giving kiddies some things to bang on and turning up the music.

Laurel
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Blackcat31 07:41 AM 06-08-2013
I was telling a provider friend about this and asked her what her "go-to" method is for shuffling out chatters and she said,

Oh, that's easy. If I get a lingering parent, I will tell her since she wants to hang out, I will put her to work. I then hand her the wet wipes and a couple diapers and tell her it's diaper changing time and since most my kids have their biggest BM's in the mornings, I am glad she is able to give me a hand. Most of them suddenly remember they need to get to work on time.

She said sometimes she will start bagging up the garbage and will hand it to mom and say "Will you drop this in the garbage can on your way out? Thanks"

She said most parents don't want to stand around holding a stinky garbage bag so they leave FAST! LOL!!
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Unregistered 09:51 AM 06-08-2013
LOL, I'm thinking the methods Blackcat mentioned should cure even the worst of chatters.
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williams2008 05:50 AM 06-10-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I was telling a provider friend about this and asked her what her "go-to" method is for shuffling out chatters and she said,

Oh, that's easy. If I get a lingering parent, I will tell her since she wants to hang out, I will put her to work. I then hand her the wet wipes and a couple diapers and tell her it's diaper changing time and since most my kids have their biggest BM's in the mornings, I am glad she is able to give me a hand. Most of them suddenly remember they need to get to work on time.

She said sometimes she will start bagging up the garbage and will hand it to mom and say "Will you drop this in the garbage can on your way out? Thanks"

She said most parents don't want to stand around holding a stinky garbage bag so they leave FAST! LOL!!
This is bound to work!!

I had a talk with her at pick up on Friday, so I'll see how today goes!
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My3cents 11:36 AM 06-18-2013
Originally Posted by williams2008:
This is bound to work!!

I had a talk with her at pick up on Friday, so I'll see how today goes!
This is your best bet. (talking to her)

I have one that has done this since day one......my last kid to leave. She wants to know all about her day, she will tell her hold on Glenda, Mommy wants to hear all about your day. She then goes through, what she ate, and engages the child in this conversation as well even when the child is clearly ready to be done and wants to go home. My menu is posted. How was her nap? Did we use the potty? What did we do today? Last kid of the day. I want to go HOME. This is directed towards me but she engages the child at the same time. UGH-

Here is the kicker this parent is a good parent. She truly wants to be active in her little girls life and daily events. It gives her something to talk about with her on the ride home. It gives her something to report to Daddy that they can both engage with child. I feel very stuck at times, because come the end of the day I want to go home.

I find that I get caught up in chatter because I truly like this parent, but inside I am screaming to myself that I just want to be done.

I have addressed the issue in my newsletter, but it still continues and I don't know how to be blunt with out hurting someones feelings or my own for having to be that blunt.

Parents don't understand or think about that you are there before they go to work and you are there after they pick up the child. You want to end your work day too! It is something that frustrates me to no end.

I admit I get caught up in it especially on Fridays, because I find myself asking any big plans for the weekend after I have been asked. For ideas for my own family for future weekends and I am sure vise versa with her also. I don't want to come across as cold to my parents, shhhoooing them out the door but come the end of the day I am so ready to be done. I don't want to make small talk with the same exact thing that happens every day.

If you find a way to make this work please share. I don't have it in me to be bold and blunt as to hurt the feelings of another- even in the process of my own madness inside of me.

The last kid of the day is the killer part of this-

For future interviews this will be stressed highly. At this point it is hard for me to implement being a hard @ss about it seeing how I have put up with this for so long and all the reasons above. One of those things that you pick your battles and this one is not a top priority even that is drives me personally buggy. I also find I contribute to it too......ugh!
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williams2008 12:15 PM 06-18-2013
Originally Posted by My3cents:
This is your best bet. (talking to her)

I have one that has done this since day one......my last kid to leave. She wants to know all about her day, she will tell her hold on Glenda, Mommy wants to hear all about your day. She then goes through, what she ate, and engages the child in this conversation as well even when the child is clearly ready to be done and wants to go home. My menu is posted. How was her nap? Did we use the potty? What did we do today? Last kid of the day. I want to go HOME. This is directed towards me but she engages the child at the same time. UGH-

Here is the kicker this parent is a good parent. She truly wants to be active in her little girls life and daily events. It gives her something to talk about with her on the ride home. It gives her something to report to Daddy that they can both engage with child. I feel very stuck at times, because come the end of the day I want to go home.

I find that I get caught up in chatter because I truly like this parent, but inside I am screaming to myself that I just want to be done.

I have addressed the issue in my newsletter, but it still continues and I don't know how to be blunt with out hurting someones feelings or my own for having to be that blunt.

Parents don't understand or think about that you are there before they go to work and you are there after they pick up the child. You want to end your work day too! It is something that frustrates me to no end.

I admit I get caught up in it especially on Fridays, because I find myself asking any big plans for the weekend after I have been asked. For ideas for my own family for future weekends and I am sure vise versa with her also. I don't want to come across as cold to my parents, shhhoooing them out the door but come the end of the day I am so ready to be done. I don't want to make small talk with the same exact thing that happens every day.

If you find a way to make this work please share. I don't have it in me to be bold and blunt as to hurt the feelings of another- even in the process of my own madness inside of me.

The last kid of the day is the killer part of this-

For future interviews this will be stressed highly. At this point it is hard for me to implement being a hard @ss about it seeing how I have put up with this for so long and all the reasons above. One of those things that you pick your battles and this one is not a top priority even that is drives me personally buggy. I also find I contribute to it too......ugh!

I found a solution, for now anyway. When I see her coming in I get all the kids together and we line up for bathroom break, so as she is signing him in/out I'm helping one of the dcks in the bathroom!
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My3cents 03:11 PM 06-18-2013
Originally Posted by williams2008:
I found a solution, for now anyway. When I see her coming in I get all the kids together and we line up for bathroom break, so as she is signing him in/out I'm helping one of the dcks in the bathroom!
I would do something like this if it wasn't the LAST kid........ugh That is the problem, I have no distractions. I blame myself too-
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Tags:chatty parents, lingering parents, long drop offs
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