A wishy-washy wimpy doormat. Yep. Right here. I admit.
Two weeks ago today I took a couple of the dcks for almost 5 hours. Never mentioned payment. When dcm picked up she said J**** paid you, right? No, I said, but don't worry about it. Then she said "Well no, I'll tack it onto next week's pay." "Ok, no problem." Two weeks forward and they must've forgotten. Why am I like that????? Now I'd feel awkward to say hey, remember you said....?
Then yesterday I get a call from a former dcm, wants to stop by at 4:45 with her dd, wants to visit. Tempted to ignore the email but no, instead I replied sure...would love to see you! So she comes at almost 5:00, other dcm that I mentioned above picks up at 5:10 and because the 2 used to work together, sits and chats for another 10-15 minutes about their former work relationship. Problem is my hours say 7-5 but I've let this one dcm slide because it's hard for either dcm or dcd to get here due to their jobs. They're nice people and I feel I'm being picky or bitchy changing my expectations of them at this point.
B E A T I N G myself over the head with a bat.
I will be redoing my contract/handbook/policies after I complete all the paperwork for my level 3 STARS. I'm just afraid if I change too much on everything I will lose a dcf or 2. And quite frankly, I haven't been getting many calls. Nobody is around here.
Ok, picking myself up off the floor now and ready to duck the tomatoes

Reply

Most of us have done this kind of thing, including me, so don't beat yourself up about it. Just do better next time. Once you do it, you'll find it wasn't really that bad and you'll feel empowered to do it again. It feels soooo good to use your backbone. Hard for many of us but good.

I wouldn't worry so much about your contract (like they read it anyway ) as thinking of some good ways to say things to clients to have ready when something comes up.

"Hmmm, I'll have to think about that and get back to you."

"Don't forget, I need you to add that 5 hours from last week on the check you bring tomorrow." (Big smile)

"Would love to see you but that time won't work for me. I have plans." (You do, you are planning not to entertain them when you're off the clock.)

Laurel

Reply

Not logging in-don't want anyone to know it's me that feels this way.

I hate the return visits from past families. I do enjoy the time while we visit, but I do not look forward to the meeting, and I am resentful of the yet even more personal time lost when they finally leave. I have moved on. Let the relationship die a natural death.

Reply

Nothing wrong with this. I also don't allow previous or even current clients to stop by during uncheduled hours. I'm working so if you want your child to stop by its because you will be leaving your child and paying me for the playdate. You can't come by or stay after hours because now I'm closed.

"Oh hi Susan. You want little Billy to come by? Sounds great! From what time to what time? For 15 minutes? Well okay, but I only charge by the full hour. Oh you wanted to visit? Well I don't mean to be rude but I can't allow adults of unenrolled children to stay, licensing rules you know. If little Billy really misses the other children I can ask the other parents permission to give their phone numbers to you and you all can coordinate a playdate at your house. Let me just ask them. "

And as for payment ..
"Hi Linda. I'm sure it was just oversight but I still have not been paid for Tuesday of the week before last. Remember you mentioned you would add that to last week's check? Oh that's ok, it just slipped your mind. Will you be giving it to me now?"

Asking for your money is terrible but only because its annoying. Don't feel bad for asking for your money, its YOUR MONEY ;-)

Reply

NOTHING wrong with this. I am the same way.

I invest an extraordinary amount of time and emotions into a child while they are enrolled here.

When they leave, I am spent. I move on and that's that.

NOTHING wrong about that in my opinion.

Reply

I feel the exact same way! Haha I'll bet a lot of us do, especially when they're dcfs that don't exactly leave us shedding lots of tears IYKWIM. She had time to kill waiting for her ds so used my house as a waiting point, I think.

Reply

I don't want previous clients dropping by either! One, its against licensing rules. Two, I just don't get super attached to the kids/families.

Sure, I have some that I did like a lot but that about it. If I got crazy attached to every kiddo, I would be a mess every time one left!!

Reply