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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>DCM Actually Asked Me Not To Discipline, Now What?
ddnanny13 06:38 AM 01-27-2011
So I have this almost 4 year old dcg who has extreme behavior issues. As you all know, because of state regs there is little we can do in the way of discipline other than different variations of time out or removing privileges. Yesterday she had upwards of 10 timeouts. I realize this is excessive but there isn't much else I can do as she obviously needs consequences for breaking rules. We go over the rules repeatedly, mom knows them all too. We have done reward charts, journals, alone time, special activities, etc. She just doesn't care. So what am I supposed to do with a child when she asks me not to put her on timeout? I would have termed her months ago but I simply cannot afford it... I am at a little bit of a loss...
missnikki 06:43 AM 01-27-2011
I would tell her to provide the name and number of someone to pick her daughter up immediately, as you cannot have children disrupting the program with repeated poor behavior.
jen 06:45 AM 01-27-2011
Put the ball back in Mom's court...
Say something like: "Oh, OK. I understand that you are not comfortable with time outs. I know how much you want little susie to learn and grow with the rest of the kids. Let's put together an action plan for dealing with her behaviors that are unacceptable for daycare and later, for school. How specifically do you want me to proceed when issues arise?
Say something like: "Oh, OK. I understand that you are not comfortable with time outs. I know how much you want little susie to learn and grow with the rest of the kids. Let's put together an action plan for dealing with her behaviors that are unacceptable for daycare and later, for school. How specifically do you want me to proceed when issues arise?
ddnanny13 06:55 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by jen:
Put the ball back in Mom's court...
Say something like: "Oh, OK. I understand that you are not comfortable with time outs. I know how much you want little susie to learn and grow with the rest of the kids. Let's put together an action plan for dealing with her behaviors that are unacceptable for daycare and later, for school. How specifically do you want me to proceed when issues arise?
I did actually do this, you know what her response was? "well at home we give her a quarter every time she does the right thing." I laughed, sorry but no way will I ever pay a child to behave.Put the ball back in Mom's court...
Say something like: "Oh, OK. I understand that you are not comfortable with time outs. I know how much you want little susie to learn and grow with the rest of the kids. Let's put together an action plan for dealing with her behaviors that are unacceptable for daycare and later, for school. How specifically do you want me to proceed when issues arise?
Blackcat31 06:59 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by ddnanny13:
I did actually do this, you know what her response was? "well at home we give her a quarter every time she does the right thing." I laughed, sorry but no way will I ever pay a child to behave.
So then maybe dcm should give you a quarter every time her child misbehaves and you can't discipline her??? I did actually do this, you know what her response was? "well at home we give her a quarter every time she does the right thing." I laughed, sorry but no way will I ever pay a child to behave.
marniewon 07:12 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
So then maybe dcm should give you a quarter every time her child misbehaves and you can't discipline her???
HA!! Love this one!!So then maybe dcm should give you a quarter every time her child misbehaves and you can't discipline her???
Originally Posted by missnikki:
I would tell her to provide the name and number of someone to pick her daughter up immediately, as you cannot have children disrupting the program with repeated poor behavior.
This is actually what I would do. For the safety and well being of your whole group, you cannot be expected to not correct bad behavior. Mom obviously is no help in telling what she would like you to do in these situations, just what she doesn't want you to do. That's ridiculous that you cannot correct bad behavior. I would tell mom that you will not do timeouts anymore, but that you will be calling her (or a designated person) to come get dcg at the first bad behavior of the day. I'm sure that if you had to call mom a few times, she would probably decide that timeouts were okay to do I would tell her to provide the name and number of someone to pick her daughter up immediately, as you cannot have children disrupting the program with repeated poor behavior.
DCMomOf3 07:19 AM 01-27-2011
She said no time outs but what of other kinds of learning. What would happen if she is acting out and you make her your cleaning helper, or something similar?
daysofelijah 07:31 AM 01-27-2011
Can you redirect or offer an alternative without actually referring to it as a time out?
For example if she is acting up and not following the rules in the playroom, then she can be told to go and read a book in a cozy spot until she is ready to try again. Or maybe she could have quiet table toys or a coloring book to go to when she is having trouble until she is ready to join the group?
Then you could let mom know that you are not giving her timeouts, just giving her another activity to do until she can participate appropriately in the group. I try not to refer to breaks from the group as time out because of the stigma parents get from it. I say, "You need to sit and read books until you are ready to follow the rules, or You need to sit at the table and color until you can join us appropriately."
If she can't do that as a behavior alternative, I'd have to let her go.
For example if she is acting up and not following the rules in the playroom, then she can be told to go and read a book in a cozy spot until she is ready to try again. Or maybe she could have quiet table toys or a coloring book to go to when she is having trouble until she is ready to join the group?
Then you could let mom know that you are not giving her timeouts, just giving her another activity to do until she can participate appropriately in the group. I try not to refer to breaks from the group as time out because of the stigma parents get from it. I say, "You need to sit and read books until you are ready to follow the rules, or You need to sit at the table and color until you can join us appropriately."
If she can't do that as a behavior alternative, I'd have to let her go.
Unregistered 07:39 AM 01-27-2011
In my contract it says I use time out as a form of punishment for children who break daycare rules they get a warning first then if they contuine they go to time out. If a parent stood in my daycare and told me not to punish their child I would tell them they are no longer a good fit for my program as children in my program are expected to behave and get punishments for misbehaving and consider it their 2 weeks notice. Don't let this woman tell you what to do in YOUR daycare plus how would it look to the other young ones if they went to time out for misbehaving but this little girl doesnt.
marniewon 07:42 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by daysofelijah:
Can you redirect or offer an alternative without actually referring to it as a time out?
For example if she is acting up and not following the rules in the playroom, then she can be told to go and read a book in a cozy spot until she is ready to try again. Or maybe she could have quiet table toys or a coloring book to go to when she is having trouble until she is ready to join the group?
I would think this would be more of an incentive to act out. Hey, I'm bad so I get to color away from all the other kids! Can you redirect or offer an alternative without actually referring to it as a time out?
For example if she is acting up and not following the rules in the playroom, then she can be told to go and read a book in a cozy spot until she is ready to try again. Or maybe she could have quiet table toys or a coloring book to go to when she is having trouble until she is ready to join the group?
Maybe just stop calling it a time out. Call it a cooling off period, and then put her in the same place you would for a time out. I still like the idea of calling mom each time she acts out.
Unregistered 07:45 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by DCMomOf3:
She said no time outs but what of other kinds of learning. What would happen if she is acting out and you make her your cleaning helper, or something similar?
Sorry, but making her be a cleaning helper is not solving the bad behavior problem!!!The behavior has to be addressed,not getting her to do something else..I think that if the girl is having issues like that and the parent will not work with you, I would term her. There is more there that meets the eye with the dcg and the parents need to address it.She said no time outs but what of other kinds of learning. What would happen if she is acting out and you make her your cleaning helper, or something similar?
jen 07:46 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by ddnanny13:
I did actually do this, you know what her response was? "well at home we give her a quarter every time she does the right thing." I laughed, sorry but no way will I ever pay a child to behave.
"Yes, that is a great idea! I will definitely provide some positive reinforcement when she does the right thing. However, we still need to address the times when she chooses not to follow the rules. Since you don't want me to use time-out, what specifically would you like me to do when she makes poor choices?"I did actually do this, you know what her response was? "well at home we give her a quarter every time she does the right thing." I laughed, sorry but no way will I ever pay a child to behave.
Sunny Day 08:04 AM 01-27-2011
I would also terminate her. It seems there will be no dealing with this parent, you will find another dck. I had pretty much this exact dilemma and also couldn't really afford to terminate, but in the end I HAD to because it was just too much stress--the child was never made to listen at home and was coddled and sucked up to every time they had a temper tantrum or got upset about anything--needless to say that didn't happen at daycare, so the child simply had a fit all day long. Children need to be disciplined when they misbehave--parents who think otherwise are just setting their kids up to be spoiled, self-righteous, and misbehaved adults who will think they don't have to follow any of the rules of society. Sorry, this is one of my biggest pet peeves--you're children are NOT perfect! 
lvt77 08:09 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by missnikki:
I would tell her to provide the name and number of someone to pick her daughter up immediately, as you cannot have children disrupting the program with repeated poor behavior.
LMAO I was just about to post this same thing... DCM called me last night and said I think it would be best no to put her DCG in T/O any more. She does not want to come back to daycare becuase you put her in T/O....I would tell her to provide the name and number of someone to pick her daughter up immediately, as you cannot have children disrupting the program with repeated poor behavior.
The child has behavior issues that cause hour screaming fits and so I started doing what missniki said.
I now use the 3 stikes your out rule and mom and dad are not ok with it, but I said my way or highway...
Unregistered 08:38 AM 01-27-2011
I would definitely not give her anything that even remotely resembles a reward for doing what is expected of her. I would absolutely refuse to reward the child for not getting into trouble. I'm fine with a sticker chart just as a means to get the momentum going in the right direction, but to pay a child a quarter for behaving? That is absurd! I hate to break it to the mom, but society won't be paying her daughter to not break rules, so why should anyone be reinforcing that in the kid now? I would tell the mom that she has 2 options: timeouts or termination.
Unregistered 08:44 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by Sunny Day:
I would also terminate her. It seems there will be no dealing with this parent, you will find another dck. I had pretty much this exact dilemma and also couldn't really afford to terminate, but in the end I HAD to because it was just too much stress--the child was never made to listen at home and was coddled and sucked up to every time they had a temper tantrum or got upset about anything--needless to say that didn't happen at daycare, so the child simply had a fit all day long. Children need to be disciplined when they misbehave--parents who think otherwise are just setting their kids up to be spoiled, self-righteous, and misbehaved adults who will think they don't have to follow any of the rules of society. Sorry, this is one of my biggest pet peeves--you're children are NOT perfect!
You hit it right on the mark!!! I totally agree with you on this!!! So glad another provider has the GUTTS to believe in discipline! Thank you!I would also terminate her. It seems there will be no dealing with this parent, you will find another dck. I had pretty much this exact dilemma and also couldn't really afford to terminate, but in the end I HAD to because it was just too much stress--the child was never made to listen at home and was coddled and sucked up to every time they had a temper tantrum or got upset about anything--needless to say that didn't happen at daycare, so the child simply had a fit all day long. Children need to be disciplined when they misbehave--parents who think otherwise are just setting their kids up to be spoiled, self-righteous, and misbehaved adults who will think they don't have to follow any of the rules of society. Sorry, this is one of my biggest pet peeves--you're children are NOT perfect!
countrymom 09:05 AM 01-27-2011
that is the funniest thing i have ever heard, parents don't want their children to do time outs. Omg, I would ask her was planet is she from. And I would laugh in her face.
BUT, I think you need to deal with her problems head on and instead of calling it "time out" call it something else. I can only imagine what she is going to be like in school, there is no way a teacher is going to deal with that, thats for sure.
Call the mom at work and ask her to come and deal with her dd since you can't discipline her.
Or better yet, (now this is mean) but tell the girl that if she is good all day that her mom will buy her mcdonalds, just keep reminding her all day. So when mom comes the girl will bug her mom for mcdonalds. Now do this everyday, so when mom asks you to stop doing that, tell her that since you can't discipline her, you bribed her, just like they do with money. That'll teach em!
BUT, I think you need to deal with her problems head on and instead of calling it "time out" call it something else. I can only imagine what she is going to be like in school, there is no way a teacher is going to deal with that, thats for sure.
Call the mom at work and ask her to come and deal with her dd since you can't discipline her.
Or better yet, (now this is mean) but tell the girl that if she is good all day that her mom will buy her mcdonalds, just keep reminding her all day. So when mom comes the girl will bug her mom for mcdonalds. Now do this everyday, so when mom asks you to stop doing that, tell her that since you can't discipline her, you bribed her, just like they do with money. That'll teach em!
nannyde 09:07 AM 01-27-2011
If you can't afford to term her then I think the only thing to do is to do as you are told. You need to make them happy so they will pay and stay.
You have tried many systems of engagement, reward, soft/no consequences, etc. and the bottom line is that you have to accept that allowing her misbehaving is what is allowing you to get the money.
It's a resignation that you may have to just accept. Just be careful with the safety of the other kids and the knowing happiness of the other kids. Once her behaviior affects their safety or the known happiness of the other kids then you will be put into a position to choose which money you must have. (known happiness is the happiness of the chidlren that is known to the child's parents).
You have tried many systems of engagement, reward, soft/no consequences, etc. and the bottom line is that you have to accept that allowing her misbehaving is what is allowing you to get the money.
It's a resignation that you may have to just accept. Just be careful with the safety of the other kids and the knowing happiness of the other kids. Once her behaviior affects their safety or the known happiness of the other kids then you will be put into a position to choose which money you must have. (known happiness is the happiness of the chidlren that is known to the child's parents).
jen 09:08 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by lvt77:
DCM called me last night and said I think it would be best no to put her DCG in T/O any more. She does not want to come back to daycare becuase you put her in T/O....
Oh for the love of God! Seriously, its a sad day when kids, instead of feeling of feeling guilty, sad, or (eek gad) ashamed over behaving badly, they are mad about being punished AND Mom and Dad back them up on it!DCM called me last night and said I think it would be best no to put her DCG in T/O any more. She does not want to come back to daycare becuase you put her in T/O....
I don't suppose it occurred to Mommy to tell her that if she didn't like going to time out, she should, I don't know, BEHAVE!!!!!!
Sorry, but my kids wouldn't tell me that they got sent to time out because they wouldn't have wanted to get into trouble a 2nd time!
lvt77 09:09 AM 01-27-2011
we actually call it refledtion time, lol that would be so funny if I could bribe with MCdonalds....they are health freaks....lol
missnikki 09:10 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by countrymom:
that is the funniest thing i have ever heard, parents don't want their children to do time outs. Omg, I would ask her was planet is she from. And I would laugh in her face.
BUT, I think you need to deal with her problems head on and instead of calling it "time out" call it something else. I can only imagine what she is going to be like in school, there is no way a teacher is going to deal with that, thats for sure.
Call the mom at work and ask her to come and deal with her dd since you can't discipline her.
Or better yet, (now this is mean) but tell the girl that if she is good all day that her mom will buy her mcdonalds, just keep reminding her all day. So when mom comes the girl will bug her mom for mcdonalds. Now do this everyday, so when mom asks you to stop doing that, tell her that since you can't discipline her, you bribed her, just like they do with money. That'll teach em!
haha! I have it! Tell mom that you will not serve timeouts. Instead, you will serve espresso to her daughter at pickup time. Tell her that bribes work on parents, too.that is the funniest thing i have ever heard, parents don't want their children to do time outs. Omg, I would ask her was planet is she from. And I would laugh in her face.
BUT, I think you need to deal with her problems head on and instead of calling it "time out" call it something else. I can only imagine what she is going to be like in school, there is no way a teacher is going to deal with that, thats for sure.
Call the mom at work and ask her to come and deal with her dd since you can't discipline her.
Or better yet, (now this is mean) but tell the girl that if she is good all day that her mom will buy her mcdonalds, just keep reminding her all day. So when mom comes the girl will bug her mom for mcdonalds. Now do this everyday, so when mom asks you to stop doing that, tell her that since you can't discipline her, you bribed her, just like they do with money. That'll teach em!
MarinaVanessa 09:10 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by jen:
"Yes, that is a great idea! I will definitely provide some positive reinforcement when she does the right thing. However, we still need to address the times when she chooses not to follow the rules. Since you don't want me to use time-out, what specifically would you like me to do when she makes poor choices?"
This is agreat response and sums up what I was going to say. There has to ne consequenses to her actions. Have DCM give you a bag of quarters so that you can reward her good behavior then. You're obviously not going to give her your money. Then have her tell you what she thinks is a good plan when addressing her negative behavior."Yes, that is a great idea! I will definitely provide some positive reinforcement when she does the right thing. However, we still need to address the times when she chooses not to follow the rules. Since you don't want me to use time-out, what specifically would you like me to do when she makes poor choices?"
laundrymom 09:21 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
This is agreat response and sums up what I was going to say. There has to ne consequenses to her actions. Have DCM give you a bag of quarters so that you can reward her good behavior then. You're obviously not going to give her your money. Then have her tell you what she thinks is a good plan when addressing her negative behavior.
I've got it!!!!! When she is good give her an m&m. Put one in a jar and keep them in plain sight. Tell her. When it's time to go home I'll let you eat ALL of them!!!!!! Then the BETTER she is,... The more she gets!!!This is agreat response and sums up what I was going to say. There has to ne consequenses to her actions. Have DCM give you a bag of quarters so that you can reward her good behavior then. You're obviously not going to give her your money. Then have her tell you what she thinks is a good plan when addressing her negative behavior.
cillybean83 09:32 AM 01-27-2011
I had a mom who didn't want her 6 year old son being disciplined. This boy was 6 and pooped his pants, wouldn't wipe his own bottom, would only eat captain crunch and lunchables, threw temper tantrums that a 1 year old wouldn't dare pull... needless to say he didn't stay long!
Anyhoo, when mom said that she didn't believe in discipline I said "that's fine" and left it at that. Every time he acted up, guess who got called at work to come get their kid? After a week of being called away from work every single day, she decided a little discipline wouldn't be so bad...I ended up terming them a few weeks later because I couldn't deal with trying to train the kid to act right!!! I thought some structure would fix him right up but he was totally babied and nothing would work...his mom even carried him on her hip to and from the car!!! he was SIX
Anyhoo, when mom said that she didn't believe in discipline I said "that's fine" and left it at that. Every time he acted up, guess who got called at work to come get their kid? After a week of being called away from work every single day, she decided a little discipline wouldn't be so bad...I ended up terming them a few weeks later because I couldn't deal with trying to train the kid to act right!!! I thought some structure would fix him right up but he was totally babied and nothing would work...his mom even carried him on her hip to and from the car!!! he was SIX
lvt77 09:41 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by laundrymom:
I've got it!!!!! When she is good give her an m&m. Put one in a jar and keep them in plain sight. Tell her. When it's time to go home I'll let you eat ALL of them!!!!!! Then the BETTER she is,... The more she gets!!!
you have me laughing so hard, the kids asked what is so funny.........that is great........thanks for the good laughI've got it!!!!! When she is good give her an m&m. Put one in a jar and keep them in plain sight. Tell her. When it's time to go home I'll let you eat ALL of them!!!!!! Then the BETTER she is,... The more she gets!!!
mac60 09:46 AM 01-27-2011
I don't believe in payment for good behavior either. I have a 3 1/2 yr old that can be a total brat. After he has been in TO several times, I will take a small blanket and fold it to about a 2' x 3' size, I will set it off in an out of the way place away from the others, that is his play spot. I give him a couple things to do of my choice, and that is where he is to stay for the remainder of play time, whether it be 15 min or 1 1/2 hours. No getting off after you have been told over and over.
Live and Learn 10:01 AM 01-27-2011
I don't do timeouts here at all...I hover and catch em in the act! "The look" stops em dead in their tracks....I also use "mean mommy voice." I find after the first couple of weeks here they are completely happy in our routine.
I have to use "the look" and "mean mommy voice" once a month or so. I have a very low ratio. 3 to 1.
I give lots of praise, hugs and kisses to the children throughout the day.
Ifa parent ever told me to not discipline their child in the manner described in my handbook I would point them towards the door.
It is my experience that children learn both good and bad behavior from each other. I suspect that it is only a matter of time before your other youngsters will start behaving poorly too if you let this one remain in your group.
The m&m idea might work. you would have to do it for everyone though and I would take m&m's out for bad behavior.
Does she hit bite or kick? If so, out the door. Not worth it.
Good luck.
"The look" stops em dead in their tracks....I also use "mean mommy voice." I find after the first couple of weeks here they are completely happy in our routine.I have to use "the look" and "mean mommy voice" once a month or so. I have a very low ratio. 3 to 1.
I give lots of praise, hugs and kisses to the children throughout the day.
Ifa parent ever told me to not discipline their child in the manner described in my handbook I would point them towards the door.
It is my experience that children learn both good and bad behavior from each other. I suspect that it is only a matter of time before your other youngsters will start behaving poorly too if you let this one remain in your group.The m&m idea might work. you would have to do it for everyone though and I would take m&m's out for bad behavior.
Does she hit bite or kick? If so, out the door. Not worth it.
Good luck.
Unregistered 10:02 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by nannyde:
If you can't afford to term her then I think the only thing to do is to do as you are told. You need to make them happy so they will pay and stay.
You have tried many systems of engagement, reward, soft/no consequences, etc. and the bottom line is that you have to accept that allowing her misbehaving is what is allowing you to get the money.
It's a resignation that you may have to just accept. Just be careful with the safety of the other kids and the knowing happiness of the other kids. Once her behaviior affects their safety or the known happiness of the other kids then you will be put into a position to choose which money you must have. (known happiness is the happiness of the chidlren that is known to the child's parents).
You have to be out of your head! Why should ANYONE have to put up with a child like that and parents like that. She may need the money, but dealing with a child and parent like that is not being reasonable. I would term her right away and let someone else deal with the child and parents.The girls behavior NEEDS to be dealt with and not giving intoIf you can't afford to term her then I think the only thing to do is to do as you are told. You need to make them happy so they will pay and stay.
You have tried many systems of engagement, reward, soft/no consequences, etc. and the bottom line is that you have to accept that allowing her misbehaving is what is allowing you to get the money.
It's a resignation that you may have to just accept. Just be careful with the safety of the other kids and the knowing happiness of the other kids. Once her behaviior affects their safety or the known happiness of the other kids then you will be put into a position to choose which money you must have. (known happiness is the happiness of the chidlren that is known to the child's parents).
the parent is a MUST! As providers, we are supposed to help raise and instill good manners and behavior in the children we take care of and not give into letting them get away with what ever they want!
nannyde 10:09 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by laundrymom:
I've got it!!!!! When she is good give her an m&m. Put one in a jar and keep them in plain sight. Tell her. When it's time to go home I'll let you eat ALL of them!!!!!! Then the BETTER she is,... The more she gets!!!
See but real quick like the little girl is going to tell her Mom that she doesn't want to wait for her candy. She wants her candy NOW and when SHE says she is being good. Every time SHE decides she's good the adult will need to give her candy NOW.I've got it!!!!! When she is good give her an m&m. Put one in a jar and keep them in plain sight. Tell her. When it's time to go home I'll let you eat ALL of them!!!!!! Then the BETTER she is,... The more she gets!!!
M&M's might be okay for a while but pretty soon it's going to be candy BARS right away ... each and every time... then it's going to be ice cream and then pop... etc. etc.
No matter what at some point in the cycle a NO is going to come her way. When a child has no boundries, rules, and limitations they simply can't function.
That's how that game works.... Once you have a kid who gets special for just normal behavior they want the special to be normal.
lvt77 10:10 AM 01-27-2011
I used to do the evil glare, and say nothing. One DCK told her mom and I both
“I don’t want miss **** to look at me anymore she is scary." Lol it was funny
I told the DCM that the child has to learn to be accountable for her actions regardless of age. There is no such thing as zero consequences...If I let her get away with it that means everyone else gets away with it too and that is not going to happen.... Bad behavior spreads like a vicious disease... I am the antidote for it....lol
“I don’t want miss **** to look at me anymore she is scary." Lol it was funny
I told the DCM that the child has to learn to be accountable for her actions regardless of age. There is no such thing as zero consequences...If I let her get away with it that means everyone else gets away with it too and that is not going to happen.... Bad behavior spreads like a vicious disease... I am the antidote for it....lol
DCMom 10:47 AM 01-27-2011
I am all for calling the parent to deal with it ~ it works! But maybe you should try dad instead. This is how it worked out for me:
My problem child is 4.5 year old dcb, but he has been a devil on wheels for a couple of weeks. He's always been challenging here, be he has taken it up a notch lately.
He was sent home EVERYDAY last week (they are here M, T, Th afternoons and Friday). On Friday, they were no call, no show so I know she was pissed and I thought for sure they were going to quit.
This week, on Monday mom had to pick him up when he pooped his pants on purpose; Tuesday he was throwing food at the lunch table; I called mom and she was unavailable, so I called Dad. I rarely see dad. I explained to him what has been going on; apparently mom had not shared with him the events of the past week or the conversations we have had over the last month...when he showed up he was clearly pissed, but not at me. At dcm and dcb.
Don't know what happened Tuesday or yesterday, but today dad dropped him off which is VERY unusual. Dcb APOLOGIZED for his behavior, promised to be good and has been better today than I think he has ever been. Dcd said to call HIM if there is a problem, that he will talk to him over the phone first and if the behavior persists, he will come and get him. He started in once just before lunch and all I had to say was 'should I call dad?' and he shaped right up.
There isn't any marks or anything
so I am asking dad what the heck he said or did...I hope it keeps up *fingers crossed*
My problem child is 4.5 year old dcb, but he has been a devil on wheels for a couple of weeks. He's always been challenging here, be he has taken it up a notch lately.
He was sent home EVERYDAY last week (they are here M, T, Th afternoons and Friday). On Friday, they were no call, no show so I know she was pissed and I thought for sure they were going to quit.
This week, on Monday mom had to pick him up when he pooped his pants on purpose; Tuesday he was throwing food at the lunch table; I called mom and she was unavailable, so I called Dad. I rarely see dad. I explained to him what has been going on; apparently mom had not shared with him the events of the past week or the conversations we have had over the last month...when he showed up he was clearly pissed, but not at me. At dcm and dcb.
Don't know what happened Tuesday or yesterday, but today dad dropped him off which is VERY unusual. Dcb APOLOGIZED for his behavior, promised to be good and has been better today than I think he has ever been. Dcd said to call HIM if there is a problem, that he will talk to him over the phone first and if the behavior persists, he will come and get him. He started in once just before lunch and all I had to say was 'should I call dad?' and he shaped right up.
There isn't any marks or anything
so I am asking dad what the heck he said or did...I hope it keeps up *fingers crossed*