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midaycare 05:30 AM 10-06-2016
Almost all of my dcf's have just one child. I'm finally getting a sibling in here soon.

I've noticed all of my dcf's of only children - except one - never talk about more kids. In fact, they go the opposite direction. "No way, no more, one is enough!"

I have parents of a 4 month old, though, who are already talking about baby #2. I must say it's a refreshing change!

I feel like parents want less kids over here in my neck of the woods.

How about you guys?
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DaveA 05:59 AM 10-06-2016
Here it's kind of the opposite- I only have 1 only child. Everyone else has at least 1 other sibling. I do think more couples are saying "only 1" when planning family size.
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Snowmom 06:26 AM 10-06-2016
I'm half and half. I actually have preschoolers in my care with baby siblings in another facility. There's been such a baby boom here in the last year!
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midaycare 06:30 AM 10-06-2016
I think what I'm finding is that the families in my care want to spend money on other things, so they are choosing smaller families. You know, bigger house, nicer vacations, nicer cars, atvs and snowmobiles for junior.
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Baby Beluga 06:30 AM 10-06-2016
Big families are pretty big in my community. Another trend I have noticed is fostering and adopting as many children as you can. There are a few families in my community who have 8+ children. One family has 16 - some are biological children and some were fostered and adopted.

I say good for them - but the thought of two scares me!
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CalCare 06:33 AM 10-06-2016
I found this:
https://www.statista.com/statistics/...ldren-by-type/
Lots of interesting stats on there.
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finsup 06:45 AM 10-06-2016
Nearly all of my families have been "one and done"...and they think im pretty much crazy for having 3, and totally 100% for another if God chooses that. My newest family will have another but not sure when. Most people who do have a second are spacing them like 5 years apart (unlike me, again lol...mine are 5, 2 and 11m).

However...you go to my Church and 3 kids is the average, 4-5 isn't uncommon. The ones that only have one are planning more and generally have them within 2 years of each other. My newest family who will have more at some point is from my Church lol.
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Controlled Chaos 07:57 AM 10-06-2016
I am a non mormon living in Utah...so my perspective is weird lol I have 3 children (2, 4 and 6) so I have a ton compared to my other non mormon friends but I have the minimum average for an LDS family around here. None of my dcfs are LDS. I have 4 sets of siblings and they are 2-3 years apart in age. I have had one family that was one and done, but she had a medically dangerous birth. Onlys are pretty rare around these parts

I appreciate people who stop after one if they don't want more. Kids are too much work to have more just because of social or religious pressure.

Side note - I am Catholic. And I laugh at church when I see all the families with only 2 kids (that's been the average in all the parishes I have attended) and we aren't technically supposed to use birth control There are a few other families that have 3 like my family, but you don't see the families with 6, 7 or 8 like you used to. If I didn't use birth control I would probably have 9 kids by now (to those struggling with fertility - I don't mean to offend, I am so grateful I was able to conceive babies easily, but I am also so grateful to live in a time with accessible birth control!)
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daycarediva 09:16 AM 10-06-2016
Originally Posted by midaycare:
I think what I'm finding is that the families in my care want to spend money on other things, so they are choosing smaller families. You know, bigger house, nicer vacations, nicer cars, atvs and snowmobiles for junior.
Yep. Stuff > kids. I don't knock their choices at all. The families I have with siblings either have money to spare OR they are spare OR their kids are spaced 5 years apart so that they are only paying for one child in FT daycare at a time.

Originally Posted by Controlled Chaos:
I am a non mormon living in Utah...so my perspective is weird lol I have 3 children (2, 4 and 6) so I have a ton compared to my other non mormon friends but I have the minimum average for an LDS family around here. None of my dcfs are LDS. I have 4 sets of siblings and they are 2-3 years apart in age. I have had one family that was one and done, but she had a medically dangerous birth. Onlys are pretty rare around these parts

I appreciate people who stop after one if they don't want more. Kids are too much work to have more just because of social or religious pressure.

Side note - I am Catholic. And I laugh at church when I see all the families with only 2 kids (that's been the average in all the parishes I have attended) and we aren't technically supposed to use birth control There are a few other families that have 3 like my family, but you don't see the families with 6, 7 or 8 like you used to. If I didn't use birth control I would probably have 9 kids by now (to those struggling with fertility - I don't mean to offend, I am so grateful I was able to conceive babies easily, but I am also so grateful to live in a time with accessible birth control!)
I have 4 and USED bc each time I got pg. I would have AT LEAST a dozen by now if it weren't for double birth control and a tubal ligation. YAY modern medicine (I love my kids, I do! But they're EXPENSIVE!)

We have a large mormon population and most have 2-3 kids. I giggle at them, too. Either everyone has excellent fertility tracking methods and those are oops babies or SOMEBODY is using BC.
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CityGarden 09:48 AM 10-06-2016
I was teaching and most students had siblings. Where I am the cost of living is high so most families cannot afford to have more than two though..... and I am finding their ages are spaced more apart than when I was younger.

Wanted to add, I have only one child but I am a single mom. I do wish when I find the right partner we might have 1-2 more however the cost of quality education will be a major factor in that decision.
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CalCare 10:25 AM 10-06-2016
My husband and I definitely aren't choosing stuff over children! We intentionally had our first and intentionally had our second when we found ourselves financially able to provide what we feel is important to provide (yes, 5 years apart!). We want to send our kids to college. We want to not worry about basic necessities. We, and many of our peers, friends, and neighbors intentionally controlled when and how many children to have. It only makes sense. It sounds like there is no winning in this conversation. If we waited and spaced our kids out 5 years and intentionally only have one or two, we must be materialistic jerks; if we don't wait and "accidentally" or purposefully have 3, 4, and 5 kids that we can barely afford to house, feed, provide child care and higher education for then we are system abusing, selfish slackers. No one can win with these judgments. Yes, the numbers of children per a family is down. That's true. That is a national trend. I think it's a good thing. We are running out of planet! I don't think people are having less children, more spaced out because they want houses, cars, and iphones!
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childcaremom 10:37 AM 10-06-2016
All of my current families have one child only. Two of them have told me that they plan to have more eventually, the others haven't told me of their plans.

I don't see a trend here, tbh. There is quite a mix of family sizes.
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midaycare 11:16 AM 10-06-2016
Originally Posted by childcaremom:
All of my current families have one child only. Two of them have told me that they plan to have more eventually, the others haven't told me of their plans.

I don't see a trend here, tbh. There is quite a mix of family sizes.
I'm not seeing one, either, based on responses. Just surprised me with so many families, I would think the law of averages states more would want more than one child. Most of my families have been uniquely honest with me about the desire to have just one though.

I only have one, but not by choice. So I'm biased. I would have had 5 or 6 if I could have.
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MarinaVanessa 12:24 PM 10-06-2016
In my area I notice that having several children is like a sign of financial status. It used to be that owning a fancy sports car meant you were wealthy, now multiple children and being a SAHM means your well off financially. I get this alot ...
"Wow, 4 kids and you stay home. You guys must be making good money!"

The ONLY reason we can afford our four kids is because I do daycare and don't have to pay for it and plus make money doing daycare.
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Pepperth 01:04 PM 10-06-2016
I only have one only child in care. All the others are the youngest in their family.
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nanglgrl 01:27 PM 10-06-2016
For the last 5 years or so I've mostly had singles in my care. There have been a couple with older siblings, in fact I watched the older brother (now 13 yo) of one 2yo I currently watch. The majority of my clients space their children out and the only sibling set I have currently are twins. Most of mine plan to have more children some day. I have 4 children, the first 3 are 7 years apart and the last are 2 1/2 years...it was so much easier having the large gap!
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knoxmomof2 05:25 PM 10-06-2016
I care for 4 at a time. The very first child I started with (we'll call him "L") just moved up to school last month. L was an only child (unplanned, born to young parents), then his parents split. Both have remarried, L gained a stepbrother from Dad's marriage (he's 2.5 and is in my care). Stepmom wants a baby, so we'll see what happens...( I told her that I have 2 openings coming in the Fall when my DCGs girls move up to Kindergarten and Preschool so they had better get on it if it's happening! Lol) Also for L, 2 months ago he gained a half brother from Mom's marriage (he just started in my care last week, we're transitioning him in slowly.)

The other 2: DCG4 is from older parents. She was planned and will be an only child so that they can afford all of the extras for her (dance, sports, Disney). DCG3 is also from older parents. She was unplanned and the parents have split. Based on what I see/ know I don't expect a future sibling but I'll be here if either of them need me.. Lol
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daycare 05:41 PM 10-06-2016
this is an interesting thread.

I have about 50-50, sibling and only children.

I find that my only children don't share well and don't need all of the attention.

I find that my children that have siblings are VERY bossy and demand most of my attention.

Most of my parents that have only one say they are done. I joke and say are you trying to put me out of business. they laugh and say kids are so expensive, we are not saying 100% no more, but they want to wait until their child is in formal schooling because two kids in childcare is too munch money.... I guess I can relate..
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