Default Style Register
Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Potty training question
Unregistered 11:43 AM 08-06-2014
I have a 3 1/2 year old DCG who I have been potty training since February. She will be 4 in December. She will go a few weeks staying clean and dry and then start wetting a pooping in underwear again. She has gone back and forth like this from the beginning. Both DCM and I agree that she has the concept of using the toilet figured out and that she can recognize when she needs to go. We have tried multiple things to get her back on track such as incentives, having her go every hour, immediate rewards, taking special toys away, ignoring the behavior and just changing her, talking to her about staying clean and dry, etc. Nothing seems to work. I have never had a child of this age go back and forth so much. At this point, it just seems that she doesn't care. I understand that children will work it out in their own time, but not sure how to deal with the off weeks. I know there is some reason she is choosing to do this, but cannot figure it out. DCM doesn't want her back in a pull-up, since we know she is capable of using the toilet. In the past when we have put her back in a pull-up, she will keep it dry, but then put her in underwear and she is wet again. This has been a very confusing challenge!! Any advice or ideas on what to try would be very appreciated!
Reply
NightOwl 11:54 AM 08-06-2014
When my nephew was approaching 4 and not potty trained, he started here with me. I had him totally trained in two weeks for one single reason: When he had an accident (wet), he cleaned himself up. I told him, when he pooped, he would also do the cleaning up. He was mortified at the thought. He immediately stopped having "accidents" and never had another one.

What was I going to do if he actually pooped? I'm not 100% positive. Lol. My general plan was to take him to the bathroom, have him undressed himself, clothes put into a plastic bag and start handing him baby wipes. I would also have another plastic bag for the wipes to go into. But it never came to that.
Reply
Tdhmom 11:55 AM 08-06-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have a 3 1/2 year old DCG who I have been potty training since February. She will be 4 in December. She will go a few weeks staying clean and dry and then start wetting a pooping in underwear again. She has gone back and forth like this from the beginning. Both DCM and I agree that she has the concept of using the toilet figured out and that she can recognize when she needs to go. We have tried multiple things to get her back on track such as incentives, having her go every hour, immediate rewards, taking special toys away, ignoring the behavior and just changing her, talking to her about staying clean and dry, etc. Nothing seems to work. I have never had a child of this age go back and forth so much. At this point, it just seems that she doesn't care. I understand that children will work it out in their own time, but not sure how to deal with the off weeks. I know there is some reason she is choosing to do this, but cannot figure it out. DCM doesn't want her back in a pull-up, since we know she is capable of using the toilet. In the past when we have put her back in a pull-up, she will keep it dry, but then put her in underwear and she is wet again. This has been a very confusing challenge!! Any advice or ideas on what to try would be very appreciated!
I had this same problem with dcb that wet his pants literally everyday!!!! I was at my breaking point with him. Dcm wouldn't do pull ups either, as a matter of fact she stopped sending them after I asked for more soooo I figured out that he had been sneaking a car in his pocket everyday (I usually don't allow outside toys....huge fights every time!) but I noticed he would play with this car in his pocket almost like it was a security blanket. Well he pottied in his pants again so I told him he had to give the car up. I was holding onto it until he kept his pants dry. The next day he would be dry....the day after that he would wet his pants again, I would take the car, wouldn't give it back until he was dry again. It was a horrible cycle but after a couple weeks he realized he would get to keep his car if he stayed dry.
I was almost going to give him a mat that you put babies on when you change them to sit on when he was playing and make him carry with him if he went somewhere else that's how much he peed on my brand new carpet!!!!!!!
Reply
Tdhmom 11:57 AM 08-06-2014
Originally Posted by Wednesday:
When my nephew was approaching 4 and not potty trained, he started here with me. I had him totally trained in two weeks for one single reason: When he had an accident (wet), he cleaned himself up. I told him, when he pooped, he would also do the cleaning up. He was mortified at the thought. He immediately stopped having "accidents" and never had another one.

What was I going to do if he actually pooped? I'm not 100% positive. Lol. My general plan was to take him to the bathroom, have him undressed himself, clothes put into a plastic bag and start handing him baby wipes. I would also have another plastic bag for the wipes to go into. But it never came to that.
I did this for #2!! After the last straw of him doing it I made him do everything, clothes in a bag, new undies in the trash (I refuse to wash someone else's childs poop out of their underwear!) and he had to clean up everywhere that poop was! Followed by some extensive handwashing...he never pooped in his undies again.
Reply
Unregistered 12:08 PM 08-06-2014
I did also try having her clean herself up after wetting herself. She would just keep having "accidents" and then clean herself up afterwards! I have not tried telling her she would have to clean up the dirty in underwear though.
Reply
Play Care 12:29 PM 08-06-2014
I don't care WHAT mom says, that child would be wearing a pull up. I would go buy them myself. No way am I dealing with that on her "off" week.
Reply
Leigh 01:16 PM 08-06-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have a 3 1/2 year old DCG who I have been potty training since February. She will be 4 in December. She will go a few weeks staying clean and dry and then start wetting a pooping in underwear again. She has gone back and forth like this from the beginning. Both DCM and I agree that she has the concept of using the toilet figured out and that she can recognize when she needs to go. We have tried multiple things to get her back on track such as incentives, having her go every hour, immediate rewards, taking special toys away, ignoring the behavior and just changing her, talking to her about staying clean and dry, etc. Nothing seems to work. I have never had a child of this age go back and forth so much. At this point, it just seems that she doesn't care. I understand that children will work it out in their own time, but not sure how to deal with the off weeks. I know there is some reason she is choosing to do this, but cannot figure it out. DCM doesn't want her back in a pull-up, since we know she is capable of using the toilet. In the past when we have put her back in a pull-up, she will keep it dry, but then put her in underwear and she is wet again. This has been a very confusing challenge!! Any advice or ideas on what to try would be very appreciated!
Is DCM cleaning up your home when the child is without a pull-up? Is SHE paying for cleaning your carpet and furniture that her child is peeing on? She doesn't want pull-ups because pull-ups are not free. I would just INSIST on the pull-up-tell mom that there is no other option. Pull-up or new daycare.
Reply
NightOwl 01:29 PM 08-06-2014
Originally Posted by Tdhmom:
I did this for #2!! After the last straw of him doing it I made him do everything, clothes in a bag, new undies in the trash (I refuse to wash someone else's childs poop out of their underwear!) and he had to clean up everywhere that poop was! Followed by some extensive handwashing...he never pooped in his undies again.

Reply
Reply Up