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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Passive/Aggressive Much?
Msdunny 10:05 AM 03-13-2014
I had to close for the day Monday because of no heat or hot water. Two of my moms were very sympathetic, and offered their houses for showers. The third wanted to know how much I would be refunding for the day. To clarify: I have NEVER made parents pay for days that I have needed to close, not that there have been many.

So Tuesdays are dance class days for this 'refund' family. Normally mom shows up by 3:20 in order to get her girls home and changed before dance class. But this past Tuesday, the day after my closing, she shows up at 4:35 - 5 minutes late - rushing her dd out the door to get to dance. She and her other dd have been home and changed clothes. Mind you, home is out of the way, and they will also now go out of their way to get back to dance. My house is on her way home from work!

I know this was because I was closed on Monday. My dh was so mad! He said, "You have given the refund for Monday, so you make sure you collect your late fees. Charge her $10!"

Parents are a trip. I am really not a fan of passive aggressive behavior!
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EntropyControlSpecialist 10:12 AM 03-13-2014
Irritating.


If your policy discusses a late fee be sure to implement it.
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Blackcat31 10:24 AM 03-13-2014
Wait..I'm confused... are you saying she purposely made more work for herself by driving back and forth as a passive aggressive gesture towards you for closing?

Or she was late and you feel it was done on purpose because you closed?

I guess I see the situation as being something that is MORE work AND money (if you charge a late fee) for her so I am not seeing how this is passive aggressive towards you....

(I'm only on my 2nd cup of coffee so I am slow this morning...sorry... )
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Cat Herder 10:43 AM 03-13-2014
I got lost at "you have given the refund"....

A refund for a power outage due to no fault of yours???

WHY
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Msdunny 10:45 AM 03-13-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Wait..I'm confused... are you saying she purposely made more work for herself by driving back and forth as a passive aggressive gesture towards you for closing?

Or she was late and you feel it was done on purpose because you closed?

I guess I see the situation as being something that is MORE work AND money (if you charge a late fee) for her so I am not seeing how this is passive aggressive towards you....

(I'm only on my 2nd cup of coffee so I am slow this morning...sorry... )
Oh, I'm definitely saying she added more work for herself, but in her mind she sees it as more work for me. Her dd is a handful for one thing, and any break mom can get she takes. I think she wanted me to offer my daughter to babysit for her on Monday, which I have done in the past; however, she had class this week and couldn't help out. There was just no other reason for it. I literally live down the street from the school where she teaches. There is probably some frustration for her because we have had several snow days and school cancellations, so she stays home but I am still paid. But, at least for now, I can't control the weather - maybe some day! I think she feels like she is going to 'get her money's worth', even if she isn't really owed anything. I am not charging her, and never planned on it because we have had the closings. I just thought the behavior was interesting. You can really see where kids pick their habits up from!
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Msdunny 10:52 AM 03-13-2014
Originally Posted by Cat Herder:
I got lost at "you have given the refund"....

A refund for a power outage due to no fault of yours???

WHY

Interesting take. So, would you have charged your parents for a day like this? I am asking honestly, not trying to be confrontational! . I felt like I couldn't offer services, therefore I shouldn't charge. I do charge for snow days or their sick days, although I don't for my own sick days or situations like this. I guess I felt like they were stuck and couldn't plan ahead for it.
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TwinKristi 10:56 AM 03-13-2014
I don't charge for days that I close whether its illness, vacation, etc.

In this situation I would definitely slap a late fee on her, she wants to play by the rules and that's the rules!
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TaylorTots 10:57 AM 03-13-2014
Originally Posted by Msdunny:
You can really see where kids pick their habits up from!
Indeed.
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My3cents 11:59 AM 03-13-2014
Originally Posted by Msdunny:
Interesting take. So, would you have charged your parents for a day like this? I am asking honestly, not trying to be confrontational! . I felt like I couldn't offer services, therefore I shouldn't charge. I do charge for snow days or their sick days, although I don't for my own sick days or situations like this. I guess I felt like they were stuck and couldn't plan ahead for it.
you need to add to your policy book and interviews that you charge for all days no matter if the child is there or not.

you need to be able to depend upon a weekly anticipated income in order to run your daycare at its best. Things happen and the parents need to have back up care for those times that they occur.

This is not being unreasonable. You should give yourself three-5 paid sick days a year. If you use them, you use them if you don't, you don't but they are there if you truly need them. Very few perks to our jobs and we work hard, long hours and are dependable and reliable.

Its not like you planned for this to happen. but you did plan for it not to happen, with food, materials needed for the day, heat, etc.... it would be different if you had to shut down for an extended period of time.

Best-
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My3cents 12:04 PM 03-13-2014
Originally Posted by TwinKristi:
I don't charge for days that I close whether its illness, vacation, etc.

In this situation I would definitely slap a late fee on her, she wants to play by the rules and that's the rules!

you should your worth it!


I agree you should charge her unless it was a one time thing and only a couple of minutes, then I would access the situation and go from there. If its a consistent late then I would charge a high late fee to get it to stop. If it didn't stop then I would have a talk, or a talk if I had to be somewhere and it interfered with my life outside of daycare.
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Tags:late fee, passive aggressive, power outage, unrealistic expectations
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