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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>We Said NO KIDS!!
vaughn40 06:06 AM 02-15-2013
My husband and I planned a weekend getaway with 2 of his brothers and wives. We all agreed that the trip would be adult only. A couple weeks ago we found out that 1 of the sister n laws son is coming and his bringing his 1 year old son and annoying girlfriend. I along with the other snl is very unhappy about this. I spoke to the sister n law who is having her grand child and child join us about it and let her know of our dissatisfaction but she seems to think that having kids there shouldn't stop our adult time because she is bringing her 14 year old daughter along to babysit when we go out to maybe have drinks or such. She stays 12 hours away from her grandson and I do understand her missing him and wanting to see him but this trip was planned and planned without children. She seems to think its no big deal. I told her, I am around children all day 5 days a week not including my grandson who lives with me. I need a getaway where I don't have to talk ANY baby talk. I feel that she should have told her son that they could meet at another time. I almost want back out altogether. Are we being unreasonable?
canadiancare 06:10 AM 02-15-2013
Originally Posted by vaughn40:
My husband and I planned a weekend getaway with 2 of his brothers and wives. We all agreed that the trip would be adult only. A couple weeks ago we found out that 1 of the sister n laws son is coming and his bringing his 1 year old son and annoying girlfriend. I along with the other snl is very unhappy about this. I spoke to the sister n law who is having her grand child and child join us about it and let her know of our dissatisfaction but she seems to think that having kids there shouldn't stop our adult time because she is bringing her 14 year old daughter along to babysit when we go out to maybe have drinks or such. She stays 12 hours away from her grandson and I do understand her missing him and wanting to see him but this trip was planned and planned without children. She seems to think its no big deal. I told her, I am around children all day 5 days a week not including my grandson who lives with me. I need a getaway where I don't have to talk ANY baby talk. I feel that she should have told her son that they could meet at another time. I almost want back out altogether. Are we being unreasonable?
You are paying for your portion of the getaway? I don't think you are being unreasonable if the rules were all agreed upon prior to booking. I say go away for some romance and let her have her family time.My husband and I planned a weekend getaway with 2 of his brothers and wives. We all agreed that the trip would be adult only. A couple weeks ago we found out that 1 of the sister n laws son is coming and his bringing his 1 year old son and annoying girlfriend. I along with the other snl is very unhappy about this. I spoke to the sister n law who is having her grand child and child join us about it and let her know of our dissatisfaction but she seems to think that having kids there shouldn't stop our adult time because she is bringing her 14 year old daughter along to babysit when we go out to maybe have drinks or such. She stays 12 hours away from her grandson and I do understand her missing him and wanting to see him but this trip was planned and planned without children. She seems to think its no big deal. I told her, I am around children all day 5 days a week not including my grandson who lives with me. I need a getaway where I don't have to talk ANY baby talk. I feel that she should have told her son that they could meet at another time. I almost want back out altogether. Are we being unreasonable?
NeedaVaca 06:47 AM 02-15-2013
I don't think you are being unreasonable either. If it was me I would be pretty upset! It sounds like this has been well planned and child free. Just tell her bottom line, no kids. If she goes and brings the kids you will end up feeling resentful for the whole trip and won't have as much fun, why let someone do that?
coolconfidentme 06:57 AM 02-15-2013
Just back out & say, you are planing a weekend without children & please enjoy yourself. Maybe next time & thank you!!! Do NOT worry about their FEELINGS..., they didn't worry about yours. The end!
Blackcat31 06:59 AM 02-15-2013
You are NOT being unreasonable!
Who planned the get away? Maybe that person can politely tell them that it is a NO kids weekend and the kids can simply not attend.
If there is no way around it, I would seriously consider backing out (making sure everyone knows exactly why) and maybe going somewhere else alone with you DH instead.
I am sure you two can use the time together alone and I can totally see why you would not want to go where anyone is bringing their children along....those things always start out as no big deal but end up being all about the kids.
Who planned the get away? Maybe that person can politely tell them that it is a NO kids weekend and the kids can simply not attend.
If there is no way around it, I would seriously consider backing out (making sure everyone knows exactly why) and maybe going somewhere else alone with you DH instead.
I am sure you two can use the time together alone and I can totally see why you would not want to go where anyone is bringing their children along....those things always start out as no big deal but end up being all about the kids.
youretooloud 07:28 AM 02-15-2013
Originally Posted by vaughn40:
I almost want back out altogether. Are we being unreasonable?
I am almost positive I would want to back out. You are not being unreasonable.I almost want back out altogether. Are we being unreasonable?
makap 08:08 AM 02-15-2013
I would insist no kids or back out and go somewhere else.
After working all week with kids and hearing their little voices, I definitely would not want to hear any kind of "kid noises" at all.
Especially when I am on a holiday that I was looking forward to going on that was supposed to be no kids!
It doesn't matter if someone else is gonna be there to look after them or not you will still be seeing and hearing them!
After working all week with kids and hearing their little voices, I definitely would not want to hear any kind of "kid noises" at all.
Especially when I am on a holiday that I was looking forward to going on that was supposed to be no kids!
It doesn't matter if someone else is gonna be there to look after them or not you will still be seeing and hearing them!
CedarCreek 08:23 AM 02-15-2013
Every summer all of the women in my family get together at a beach house for a week. If any one of us dared to bring a kid under 21, we would be kicked out! 
So no,I don't think you're being unreasonable.
So no,I don't think you're being unreasonable.
juliebug 10:27 AM 02-15-2013
I would back out and tell them why. you all agreed no kids now someone is bringing a kid nope no way! back out and go some where with your hubby! 
mema 11:51 AM 02-15-2013
No kids=NO KIDS! If they agreed and aren't following thru, then I would go somewhere else. Let them know that it was suppose to be a kid free time and since they can't follow thru on what they agreed to, you are going to get that time elsewhere! Wish them luck on their quiet weekend
, even with a babysitter, it won't be. Go enjoy dh and quiet somewhere and have fun!
, even with a babysitter, it won't be. Go enjoy dh and quiet somewhere and have fun!
canadiancare 12:24 PM 02-15-2013
What's the verdict?
vaughn40 09:36 PM 02-16-2013
We all pretty much planned it and made a point of making it an adult getaway. I am really considering backing out because after mentioning that this was suppose to be adult only, she seems to think its a joke and that the kids being there shouldn't interrupt our adult time.
vaughn40 09:39 PM 02-16-2013
That's exactly how I feel. I don't want to have to talk any baby talk at all that weekend. I don't want to hear any screaming, nothing.
vaughn40 10:03 PM 02-16-2013
Me and my snl decided that we're gonna get a different hotel than the snl with the kids and just do our own thing. I tried talking to her but she said that she just couldn't say no to her son because she would have been saying no to grandson. We plan to pretty much avoid them most of the trip.
Blackcat31 07:21 AM 02-17-2013
Originally Posted by vaughn40:
Me and my snl decided that we're gonna get a different hotel than the snl with the kids and just do our own thing. I tried talking to her but she said that she just couldn't say no to her son because she would have been saying no to grandson. We plan to pretty much avoid them most of the trip.
Good for you! There is a great lesson in this for your SIL who is bringing children and you and your other SIL shouldn't feel one bit guilty! Me and my snl decided that we're gonna get a different hotel than the snl with the kids and just do our own thing. I tried talking to her but she said that she just couldn't say no to her son because she would have been saying no to grandson. We plan to pretty much avoid them most of the trip.
Everyone deserves kid free time whether away or at home and although some people might be insulted or not understand, it is still your right.
I hope you and your "kidless" SIL have a fabulous time with you DH's and enjoy every minute!!!
NeedaVaca 09:56 AM 02-18-2013
I hope you had a great weekend (kid free)!! Any problems or did all go well?
Bkind 10:07 AM 02-18-2013
my husband and I do daycare and I would have to say we would back out b/c even though we are not responsible to watch these kids is just who we are what we are about and we know we just would get that get away peace of mind and would not be able to relax like you say you are looking for ... like when a child almost falls we would want to jolt or what not we just can not turn off who we are just b/c they are not " our responsibility" we even have call ahead to a restaurant to explain why we want a table not so close to little ones don't get me wrong we love them but we need to unwind now and then ,, BACK OUT or stay at a separate location and meet up when they don't have the kids with them