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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Potty Training Woes Here, Too
KIDZRMYBIZ 04:09 PM 02-10-2014
Bah! Torqued off! DCG 3.75 has had a 2nd relapse. First was in Oct thru much of Dec. Fine for about 7 wks, then started having "accidents" again last Fri. Mostly of the poop variety, to make things worse.

Here's my policy, straight from my handbook:

If there is a relapse in potty training, your child will wear training pants that he/she can manage by themselves until they are clean and dry for a full 2-week period. This is for health and sanitary reasons. No exceptions.

Of course, DCM has a cow at pick-up over this, and blames it on the fact that I have a new baby here. Um, no. I take care of other babies and children all day, every day, and this particular bundle does not faze her in the least. Not to mention, this baby has been here since the end of Dec, and she wasn't even here today, yet her little darling crapped her pants anyhow.

So, their solution is for me to put her on the toilet when they arrive and wait for her to do her business. My response was this, also from my handbook:

Children should be prepared for the day, ready to jump into our schedule. They will arrive clean, dressed, groomed, and not in need of using the toilet. Mornings are very busy with arrivals and breakfast. There is no extra time to do these morning preparations for your child.

DCM argued this as well, that they just can't wait for her to go at home and go in any later to work. And so a huge "THANK YOU!!!!!" to BlackCat! I used her (should be patened) not-to-be-argued-with line...Drumroll, please...

DCM, I sympathize with your frustration with the situation. I understand your concern with not wanting to use the pull-ups. I realize your work is important. My policies are non-negotiable. Helping your daughter overcome this relapse is A PARENT RESPONSIBILITY.

When I said those words, her tune changed and she said she would discuss it with DCD to change their morning routine so she would have the opportunity to do her business at home before arriving.

If they come back tomorrow morning and try to put it back on me, I am going to just tell them, "I regret that my program no longer fits your needs. You have 2 weeks to find another daycare that does."
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daycarediva 05:39 PM 02-10-2014
what a backbone!!!
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MCC 07:42 PM 02-10-2014
Wow. I am so impressed!

I have a DCG 2.5 who is struggling horribly with potty training, and it is making my mornings awful. Every morning she poops her pants. EVERY.MORNING. If I set the timer for her to pee, she will keep her pants dry all day, but she will poop them, even after being on the toilet seconds ago. She does not want to potty train, but DCM does.

I do not have anything in my policies about potty training, other than "we will do as much as you are doing" I am kicking myself for this one. I need to come up with a way to make this stop.
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cheerfuldom 09:09 PM 02-10-2014
Originally Posted by MCC:
Wow. I am so impressed!

I have a DCG 2.5 who is struggling horribly with potty training, and it is making my mornings awful. Every morning she poops her pants. EVERY.MORNING. If I set the timer for her to pee, she will keep her pants dry all day, but she will poop them, even after being on the toilet seconds ago. She does not want to potty train, but DCM does.

I do not have anything in my policies about potty training, other than "we will do as much as you are doing" I am kicking myself for this one. I need to come up with a way to make this stop.
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Make an ammendment to your contract and make it effective immediately. You do not have to put up with this nonsense.
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cheerfuldom 09:13 PM 02-10-2014
WOW! OP, I am so proud of you! I really am just continually shocked at parents that dont want to do the simplest thing. Get up two minutes earlier and put your child on the potty before taking them to daycare! Really. It is not that hard. Its like parents dont want to feed, diaper, dress their child in the morning. Why even take them home at night at all if you want the daycare providers to do it all anyway? And then say "oh well I will take to my hubby about rearranging our schedule" as if this is some sort of huge sacrifice for them. ugh. really chaps my hide. And then blaming it on the new baby! wth??? that doesn't even make sense.
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KIDZRMYBIZ 07:23 AM 02-11-2014
DCD dropped DCG off this morning, in a pull-up, and told me she did #1 and #2 this morning. I could tell he was peeved and wanted to discuss (meaning to have me back down-this DCD is very demonstrative), so I just said "that's great!", high-fived DCG, and walked off into the playroom with my usual cheerful banter with all the kiddos. I knew if I said anymore on the subject it would crack my resolve.

I think part of the problem is the reaction DCG gets from all this. I just tell her it's yucky, clean her up, tell her I expect her to be a big kid and pay attention to her body, and move on. They, instead, are psycho-analyzing it to death. In truth, it's very simple. They aren't giving her time to go at home in the morning, then at daycare she is too busy playing to take time out to go until it's too late. Of course, they won't take responsibility nor hold her accountable. Then, today, there's promises of icecream and stickers if she has no accidents. I think at almost 4yo, it should just be an expectation and that is that.

This, BTW, is my family that puts DCG and now 18mo DCB to bed at 6:30, so I already have very little respect for their parenting (rather non-parenting) ways. Maybe now that I am asserting myself, they will find another daycare gal they can push around...
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Blackcat31 07:35 AM 02-11-2014
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Good Job!!! Nicely done!!!
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cheerfuldom 07:37 AM 02-11-2014
Originally Posted by KIDZRMYBIZ:
DCD dropped DCG off this morning, in a pull-up, and told me she did #1 and #2 this morning. I could tell he was peeved and wanted to discuss (meaning to have me back down-this DCD is very demonstrative), so I just said "that's great!", high-fived DCG, and walked off into the playroom with my usual cheerful banter with all the kiddos. I knew if I said anymore on the subject it would crack my resolve.

I think part of the problem is the reaction DCG gets from all this. I just tell her it's yucky, clean her up, tell her I expect her to be a big kid and pay attention to her body, and move on. They, instead, are psycho-analyzing it to death. In truth, it's very simple. They aren't giving her time to go at home in the morning, then at daycare she is too busy playing to take time out to go until it's too late. Of course, they won't take responsibility nor hold her accountable. Then, today, there's promises of icecream and stickers if she has no accidents. I think at almost 4yo, it should just be an expectation and that is that.

This, BTW, is my family that puts DCG and now 18mo DCB to bed at 6:30, so I already have very little respect for their parenting (rather non-parenting) ways. Maybe now that I am asserting myself, they will find another daycare gal they can push around...
exactly the type of parents I thought this was....parents that want to do as little as possible. So they have like one hour of face time in the morning and one hour at night. Thats just really sad. There is no reason why an almost 4 year old is going to sleep at 630 when the parents are not waking early and this child is getting a nap at your house I assume. This is just ridiculous. Constant big prizes just backfires on parents. That never works. You cannot give your kid ice cream every time they go potty! LOL its just too laughable.
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Tags:parental responsibility, potty training
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