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caregiver 09:56 AM 03-20-2014
I have been having a problem with one of my DCG, who is 2 yrs old. She has been hitting & Biting her brother, who I also have in my daycare. He is 4 and a half. I talked with their Mom this morning about her biting & hitting and if she does this at home also, which she does.
My vent is not about the biting and hitting issue, but the realization that we providers spend more time with the kids then the parents do. Found out that this dcg's parents only spend 1 hour with her at night after picking her up from here. They feed her dinner and then she goes to bed at 7pm.

It is like WOW! One hour they spend with both the kids at night! I guess I AM raising their kids! Parents don't seem to really take the time, or have the time to really spend with their kids these days. How sad is that!!
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LadyPearl 10:07 AM 03-20-2014
I recently had a brother and sister for about 4 9-hr days per week....perfectly reasonable. Well dcd is changing jobs and I was asked to take the kids for 5 days at 11-12hrs per day! Say what!! They switched to a daycare in the town that they both will be working which takes off about 1 1/2hrs of daycare per day. I was asked if I would take them back when dcg starts K in fall 2015. Not at those hours!!
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FCCarmyprovider 10:12 AM 03-20-2014
In army fcc we have to watch kids from 6 am to 6 pm and every single parent mom ive had has dropped her kid off at 600 and picked up at 6pm or later..
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FCCarmyprovider 10:13 AM 03-20-2014
and no most of these soldier moms do not work from 6 am to 6 pm they just want "me time"


I have no idea what me time is anymore
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nanglgrl 10:33 AM 03-20-2014
I just turned down a client that wanted 12 hour days 5 days a week. She was going to be home with a newborn. She is having a second C section and feels that she won't be able to handle her other child who's also under a year old. I've never had a C section and can't imagine the pain or difficulty she would have handling 2 babies but 12 hour days is just too much for a child.
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nannyde 10:55 AM 03-20-2014
Originally Posted by nanglgrl:
I just turned down a client that wanted 12 hour days 5 days a week. She was going to be home with a newborn. She is having a second C section and feels that she won't be able to handle her other child who's also under a year old. I've never had a C section and can't imagine the pain or difficulty she would have handling 2 babies but 12 hour days is just too much for a child.
Why have the second kid? That's what I'm not getting now.

When in our history have moms been able to one to one the second born child for months?

It's not THAT hard to take care of two kids. I swear all the parenting groups and mommy groups have convinced these moms that it is SO hard and that new baby needs their own adult. I'm rarely ever hearing about moms keeping the first kid home when the second one is born unless the first isn't in day care in the first place.

We need to GET A GRIP. It's not THAT hard. You have a roof over your head, food in your belly, a washer and dryer, electricity, running water, a microwave and a stove. You have a grocery store and a car. It's not like the mom has to chop wood, hand carry water, keep a wood stove lit, bake from scratch, tend a garden and raise meat.

What is SO hard about taking care of two little kids with all the conveniences we have now?
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LadyPearl 10:56 AM 03-20-2014
Originally Posted by FCCarmyprovider:
In army fcc we have to watch kids from 6 am to 6 pm and every single parent mom ive had has dropped her kid off at 600 and picked up at 6pm or later..
Yikes! Must easily lead to provider burnout......
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Play Care 11:09 AM 03-20-2014
Originally Posted by FCCarmyprovider:
In army fcc we have to watch kids from 6 am to 6 pm and every single parent mom ive had has dropped her kid off at 600 and picked up at 6pm or later..
Say whaaaat?!

I could never work those hours! And if they can dictate how long you have to be at work, I hope they also provide pension, health benefits, PTO,etc. cause otherwise you're getting hosed!
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Naptime yet? 11:12 AM 03-20-2014
Originally Posted by nannyde:
Why have the second kid? That's what I'm not getting now.

When in our history have moms been able to one to one the second born child for months?

It's not THAT hard to take care of two kids. I swear all the parenting groups and mommy groups have convinced these moms that it is SO hard and that new baby needs their own adult. I'm rarely ever hearing about moms keeping the first kid home when the second one is born unless the first isn't in day care in the first place.

We need to GET A GRIP. It's not THAT hard. You have a roof over your head, food in your belly, a washer and dryer, electricity, running water, a microwave and a stove. You have a grocery store and a car. It's not like the mom has to chop wood, hand carry water, keep a wood stove lit, bake from scratch, tend a garden and raise meat.

What is SO hard about taking care of two little kids with all the conveniences we have now?
Amen! Not to go off topic or commandeer this post, but I have a DCM who brought dcb2 to me throughout her maternity leave & makes comments about how hard it is to deal with 2 kids. I just smile and do my job.
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Shell 11:23 AM 03-20-2014
Originally Posted by nannyde:
Why have the second kid? That's what I'm not getting now.

When in our history have moms been able to one to one the second born child for months?

It's not THAT hard to take care of two kids. I swear all the parenting groups and mommy groups have convinced these moms that it is SO hard and that new baby needs their own adult. I'm rarely ever hearing about moms keeping the first kid home when the second one is born unless the first isn't in day care in the first place.

We need to GET A GRIP. It's not THAT hard. You have a roof over your head, food in your belly, a washer and dryer, electricity, running water, a microwave and a stove. You have a grocery store and a car. It's not like the mom has to chop wood, hand carry water, keep a wood stove lit, bake from scratch, tend a garden and raise meat.

What is SO hard about taking care of two little kids with all the conveniences we have now?
So true
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melilley 11:26 AM 03-20-2014
Originally Posted by Naptime yet?:
Amen! Not to go off topic or commandeer this post, but I have a DCM who brought dcb2 to me throughout her maternity leave & makes comments about how hard it is to deal with 2 kids. I just smile and do my job.
Hah! My ds is 1.5 and I have 3 other dck's that are 1.5 and under, plus a 3 yo and 2 2.y yo. Not on the same days of course, but full time, I have 3 that are 1.5 and under and a rambunctious 2.5 yo...every day..wonder how I do it?..lol

I seriously think that there are some of us who are "made" (for lack of a better word) to do this line of work. I always hear "I don't know how you do it" from people. Others, they like the idea of having kids, but to do the work is a different story.

But, honestly, I would go insane if I had to sit behind a cubicle all day or I think I would cry if I went into the military..lol
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Shell 11:29 AM 03-20-2014
A little bit of a rant, but I was out to dinner with a good friend that I hadn't seen in several months. She asked my ds how his sister is doing (she has 3 young kids). My friend said, "wow, how does she do it with that many kids?" I angrily responded, "she doesn't do any of it...her kids are at daycare all day, you should ask her provider how SHE does it".
I know this parenting life style keeps some of us in business, so for that, I am grateful that there is a need for our profession. This is why I prefer part time kids the most-it's a great balance between both worlds.
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Heidi 11:31 AM 03-20-2014
Originally Posted by nannyde:
Why have the second kid? That's what I'm not getting now.

When in our history have moms been able to one to one the second born child for months?

It's not THAT hard to take care of two kids. I swear all the parenting groups and mommy groups have convinced these moms that it is SO hard and that new baby needs their own adult. I'm rarely ever hearing about moms keeping the first kid home when the second one is born unless the first isn't in day care in the first place.

We need to GET A GRIP. It's not THAT hard. You have a roof over your head, food in your belly, a washer and dryer, electricity, running water, a microwave and a stove. You have a grocery store and a car. It's not like the mom has to chop wood, hand carry water, keep a wood stove lit, bake from scratch, tend a garden and raise meat.

What is SO hard about taking care of two little kids with all the conveniences we have now?
Ha!

I had a mom last year who couldn't pump milk (kid wasn't hungry yet) for a later feeding because...gasp...Dadwasn't home to "take care of the baby" while she pumped. Seriously, one four month old baby, and you can't do ANYTHING else when you're home alone with her?

BTW: This baby was sleeping one the same schedule as all my other kids within a week of being here, she was easy-peasy. But, mom claimed she was sooo intense. I chose not to keep this family, because whatever going on at home (night waking) was now MY fault. whaaat?
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Heidi 11:34 AM 03-20-2014
Originally Posted by melilley:
Hah! My ds is 1.5 and I have 3 other dck's that are 1.5 and under, plus a 3 yo and 2 2.y yo. Not on the same days of course, but full time, I have 3 that are 1.5 and under and a rambunctious 2.5 yo...every day..wonder how I do it?..lol

I seriously think that there are some of us who are "made" (for lack of a better word) to do this line of work. I always hear "I don't know how you do it" from people. Others, they like the idea of having kids, but to do the work is a different story.

But, honestly, I would go insane if I had to sit behind a cubicle all day or I think I would cry if I went into the military..lol
Wierd...I could have written this. Same group I have full-time.

Oh, and working in a factory? I'd rather you pay me to just bang my head against the wall all day.
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KidGrind 11:53 AM 03-20-2014
Originally Posted by FCCarmyprovider:
In army fcc we have to watch kids from 6 am to 6 pm and every single parent mom ive had has dropped her kid off at 600 and picked up at 6pm or later..
Is that Germany’s requirement? I do NOT have to watch anyone’s kid from 6:00 AM to 6:00 PM. The AR 608-10 dictates that no child will be in care for more than 12 hours without command’s approval. It does not state you have to have children in care for 12 hours.

6–22. Operating hours
a. FCC providers will specify hours of service with each patron. Care will not exceed 12 hours of continuous care per day on a regular basis unless the FCC provider has obtained the special endorsement for extended care or long term care.


I do contracted hours. During the interviewing process, I have the parents fill out what their work hours are individually. Then I look at their schedules and suggest a drop off and pick up time. I respect single service members with children. However, their me time is their concern not mine.

Example:

Sponsor M-F 6:00 AM to 4:00 PM
Spouse M,W,Th,F,S 8:30 to 5:00 PM

The schedule I will offer them is M,W,Th,F 7:30 AM to 5:00 PM.

I’ll compromise with 7:00 AM to 5:00 PM.

We are independent contractors, not CDCs.
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sahm1225 12:58 PM 03-20-2014
When I first started my daycare (and before I had a backbone ha ha!) I had a mom who would get here at 6:50am (start time was 7:00) and stay until about 7:10. She would pick up exactly at 5:30, i would practically kick them out the door at 5:45pm. Dd wAs about 8 months old (I also had my own 8 month old and a 2 year old). She once told me that dd went to bed at 6:45pm and woke up at 6:30am. So you figure by the time she got home, she basically changed dd diaper and put her to bed!

They ended up leaving my daycare and one of my favorite Dcd tells me that he didn't want to cause trouble but that he rode the same train to work with her every morning... At 8:24am! Unbelievable.
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Mom o Col 01:46 PM 03-20-2014
Originally Posted by nannyde:
Why have the second kid? That's what I'm not getting now.

When in our history have moms been able to one to one the second born child for months?

It's not THAT hard to take care of two kids. I swear all the parenting groups and mommy groups have convinced these moms that it is SO hard and that new baby needs their own adult. I'm rarely ever hearing about moms keeping the first kid home when the second one is born unless the first isn't in day care in the first place.

We need to GET A GRIP. It's not THAT hard. You have a roof over your head, food in your belly, a washer and dryer, electricity, running water, a microwave and a stove. You have a grocery store and a car. It's not like the mom has to chop wood, hand carry water, keep a wood stove lit, bake from scratch, tend a garden and raise meat.

What is SO hard about taking care of two little kids with all the conveniences we have now?
I totally agree!!!
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cheerfuldom 02:02 PM 03-20-2014
Originally Posted by nannyde:
Why have the second kid? That's what I'm not getting now.

When in our history have moms been able to one to one the second born child for months?

It's not THAT hard to take care of two kids. I swear all the parenting groups and mommy groups have convinced these moms that it is SO hard and that new baby needs their own adult. I'm rarely ever hearing about moms keeping the first kid home when the second one is born unless the first isn't in day care in the first place.

We need to GET A GRIP. It's not THAT hard. You have a roof over your head, food in your belly, a washer and dryer, electricity, running water, a microwave and a stove. You have a grocery store and a car. It's not like the mom has to chop wood, hand carry water, keep a wood stove lit, bake from scratch, tend a garden and raise meat.

What is SO hard about taking care of two little kids with all the conveniences we have now?
STRONGLY agree. After having my third, I was doing daycare part time within one week, full time within two weeks, 6 to 8 kids a day. I am not super mom or anyone that has all the answers or all this super human energy and patience.....my parents sucked at parenting and I was on my own to learn everything. No one helped me after the 3rd and 4th babies were born and my husband works up to 80 hours a week at times! You suck it up and get the job done. You do whatever you have to do to rise to the occasion. Most people don't know how to parent multiple kids, I know I didn't but you get in there, learn fast and work hard.

Nowadays, parents can easily use daycare, nannies, housekeepers....you don't have to do anything if you have the money to pay someone else to do it. None of those things are bad but in excess, parents become lazy and clueless.
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