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happymom 03:43 PM 04-28-2017
If a one year old is starting to keep his diapers dry between changes, is it appropriate for the parent to ask that they let him attempt to use the toilet at diaper changes?

What is your protocol when it comes to several dry diapers in a day?
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Ariana 03:48 PM 04-28-2017
What do you mean dry between diaper changes? He pees only when being changed? I am confused.

Toilet training does not begin here until a child can ask to go to the bathroom and is able to go themselves.
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happymom 03:51 PM 04-28-2017
They change every 2 hours, and his diapers are dry when it is changing time. Yesterday, all day, he only had one diaper change.
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Ariana 03:54 PM 04-28-2017
Originally Posted by happymom:
They change every 2 hours, and his diapers are dry when it is changing time. Yesterday, all day, he only had one diaper change.
So he urinated once in 8 hours? does he only pee in the toilet with you?
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happymom 03:55 PM 04-28-2017
They have a form that they gave me stating that they would start practicing with him on the potty at 18 months, and I know they took him once - because they told me he went pee in the potty and they started a sticker chart for him.

But I have no idea what is happening and no one can tell me.
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Pestle 04:07 PM 04-28-2017
When he is with you, how often is he urinating? That sounds like dehydration if it's just once a day.
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happymom 04:14 PM 04-28-2017
He was only in care for 7 hours that day. With me he is peeing more often than that.

I toilet him at transitional times, before meals, before bath, before bed, upon waking. He never does full pees in the toilet, just tiny ones. He wears cloth diapers, so part of me wonders if they are misinterpreting wet diapers at being dry. He's not peeing through them though (otherwise his pants would be wet).
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Leigh 04:26 PM 04-28-2017
Originally Posted by happymom:
If a one year old is starting to keep his diapers dry between changes, is it appropriate for the parent to ask that they let him attempt to use the toilet at diaper changes?

What is your protocol when it comes to several dry diapers in a day?
I wouldn't consider working on potty training at daycare for a 1 year old. I'd just tell the parent no.

If he's dry between changes, I think they're not giving him enough fluids at daycare.
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happymom 04:40 PM 04-28-2017
Ok perfect!

I potty trained my first kid too early, but got excited by what he was showing me he is capable of at home (climbing on the toilet himself and eliminating right away).

I will wait until he's in the two year old room to put in the work and try to actually potty train him and just continue doing elimination communication with him at home to hopefully train him easier when the time comes.
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Leigh 09:16 AM 04-29-2017
Originally Posted by happymom:
Ok perfect!

I potty trained my first kid too early, but got excited by what he was showing me he is capable of at home (climbing on the toilet himself and eliminating right away).

I will wait until he's in the two year old room to put in the work and try to actually potty train him and just continue doing elimination communication with him at home to hopefully train him easier when the time comes.
This is why I don't encourage early potty training (this and the fact that it often just frustrates child and parent when the child is not ready)

https://health.clevelandclinic.org/2...ning-too-soon/

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/steve-...b_1424826.html

I had a child before who was a "chronic holder", and at age 5.5, he's still having issues with blockages. He didn't train until he was nearly 5, and he used pooping as a means of control (it wasn't pretty).

I have one now who started training at 2 years old, and he's now 6 weeks from 3 and still not trained, though he IS pooping and peeing in inappropriate places (the floor), plays with poop, and, like the other child, uses elimination as a means of control over his body, his parents, and his situation. He often poops in his sleep (I assume his body can't handle holding it any longer, so when he relaxes, out it comes).

I know that many don't agree with me, but I firmly believe that kids will train when THEY are ready, and when that happens, it is EASY. My son trained at 3.5. He put on underwear and that was that. NEVER had an accident. There was no frustration. He simply went from diapers to underwear and used the toilet from that moment forward. After my son trained, his friend at daycare (just turned 3) was so proud of him, so my son told him that he'd "teach him how to get potty trained". My son took him to the bathroom a few times, and that child started using the toilet, too. Again, no accidents, because HE was ready.
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Ariana 04:53 PM 04-29-2017
Originally Posted by happymom:
Ok perfect!

I potty trained my first kid too early, but got excited by what he was showing me he is capable of at home (climbing on the toilet himself and eliminating right away).

I will wait until he's in the two year old room to put in the work and try to actually potty train him and just continue doing elimination communication with him at home to hopefully train him easier when the time comes.
Most infant rooms do not have bathroom breaks built in so what you are asking for is special treatment for your son which often cannot work in group care. Early potty training is great for the stay at home mom.

Did he really start using the toilet all on his own? This might be creating a bad situation for your child because he is now holding his urine. This is what concerns me the most. He seems to have the idea that it is not ok to go in his diaper and is getting mixed messages which may end up shooting you in the foot in the end. Personally I would stop all "elimination communication" and let him go in his diaper so he has a better time at daycare. The consistency is very important for emotional wellbeing.
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happymom 03:51 PM 05-01-2017
http://www.jamieglowacki.com/my-rebuttal-to-dr-hodges/

My first son was trained shortly after 2 (started at 21 months), he is 5, doesn't wet the bed and doesn't have accidents or other bathroom issues. There were bumps in the road, sure, but I don't agree with making a child sit in their own urine until they are 3.5 just to make potty training easier.

Kids would learn a lot of things easier later in life. A 10 year old could probably learn to tie their shoes in 3 minutes, but does that mean I should tie his shoes for him until he's 10?

And no, he only goes on his own if I remove his diaper and tell him it's time to go. Then he happily climbs up and goes. Sometimes he will say he has to poop, but normally he will do his poop face and I will take him to the toilet to go poop. For pee, he squeezes what he can out onto the toilet every time I tell him it's time to go, but he doesn't communicate with me that he has to go.

He's still going through a lot of diapers, every diaper I change is wet, which makes me think that perhaps daycare THOUGHT his diapers were dry and therefore skipped a change, even if it may have been wet (sometimes with cloth it's hard to tell if you don't know what to look for).
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happymom 03:52 PM 05-01-2017
I am not looking for special treatment. They sent home a potty training page that says they start toileting kids at 18 months so they can get used to it in daycare....

I think they just aren't doing it.
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Blackcat31 07:38 AM 05-02-2017
Is your son 1 yrs old as in a NEW 1 yr old or is he closer to 2 yrs old?

I don't know, I don't do extra steps for potty training as I am 1 person doing group care but I understand what you mean about cloth diapering....I DO think kids in cloth recognize the need to urinate long before kids in diapers do. I think they know the feeling of "wet" and "not wet" much earlier than disposable wearers.

I've had multiple cloth diapered kids over the last 4 years and I can say with certainty that all of them trained earlier and easier than those using disposables. About half were boys.

I feel I am still a newbie when it comes to cloth diapers but I have noticed a difference in how cloth diapered kids feel/think/behave in regards to toileting in comparison to disposable wearing kids. (I am still in the observations and fact gathering stages...lol!)

I am also in the school of waiting until a child is ready (your example of tying shoes at 10 is a valid one) however......as group care I just can't do what I would do if I were the parent.

I don't have the time, the hands or the eyes to do it as one (even 2 people) but I am curious how many staff people they do have in your son's room? How many kids and what ages?
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Snowmom 08:41 AM 05-02-2017
Originally Posted by happymom:
If a one year old is starting to keep his diapers dry between changes, is it appropriate for the parent to ask that they let him attempt to use the toilet at diaper changes?

What is your protocol when it comes to several dry diapers in a day?
Every center and in-home provider has different policies, so the "right" answer would be: whatever their PT policy states is what you should expect.

If it were me personally: I would tell the parent that I do not start PT in daycare until ALL the signs of readiness are present. Which includes being able to communicate the need to go and be able to independently dress/undress while using the toilet (supervised- but minimal help).

IMHO, PT for children that young CAN be done, but due to the level of difficulty for the child (communicating, dressing, balancing, proper wiping & hand washing), it should not be on the provider's time.
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happymom 09:05 AM 05-02-2017
He's 1.5 (19 months).

He is in the "ones" class. Infants move to the ones when they dropped their morning nap, can walk, and are eating solid foods for all meals (no bottles). The youngest kids are 13-15 months, and the oldest have recently turned 2.

Ratio is 1 adult to 4 kids, so once there is a 5th kid - there are 2 adults in the room. They are only licensed for 8 kids in the one year old room, so there are never more than 8 kids/2 adults in there. They have two bathrooms with 2 tiny toilets in each and they are directly across the hall from the ones classroom.

But you're right. I really don't know the logistics of how they do bathroom time for a half dozen tiny children. I think they want him in undies with pullups over the top to start doing bathroom runs. I agree that it would be easier, so I should probably just drop it until we decide to put our full effort into potty training (he's not ready yet). I will be using cloth trainers for him. Pull ups are bad for the environment...
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happymom 09:12 AM 05-02-2017
Originally Posted by Snowmom:
Every center and in-home provider has different policies, so the "right" answer would be: whatever their PT policy states is what you should expect.

If it were me personally: I would tell the parent that I do not start PT in daycare until ALL the signs of readiness are present. Which includes being able to communicate the need to go and be able to independently dress/undress while using the toilet (supervised- but minimal help).

IMHO, PT for children that young CAN be done, but due to the level of difficulty for the child (communicating, dressing, balancing, proper wiping & hand washing), it should not be on the provider's time.
Thank you for your response. It's very frustrating that my center doesn't have a policy, they say "whatever the parent wants" when I have asked. Although they encourage underpants under pull ups for training, they allow children to go straight to underpants as well.
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Blackcat31 09:40 AM 05-02-2017
Originally Posted by happymom:
He's 1.5 (19 months).

He is in the "ones" class. Infants move to the ones when they dropped their morning nap, can walk, and are eating solid foods for all meals (no bottles). The youngest kids are 13-15 months, and the oldest have recently turned 2.

Ratio is 1 adult to 4 kids, so once there is a 5th kid - there are 2 adults in the room. They are only licensed for 8 kids in the one year old room, so there are never more than 8 kids/2 adults in there. They have two bathrooms with 2 tiny toilets in each and they are directly across the hall from the ones classroom.

But you're right. I really don't know the logistics of how they do bathroom time for a half dozen tiny children. I think they want him in undies with pullups over the top to start doing bathroom runs. I agree that it would be easier, so I should probably just drop it until we decide to put our full effort into potty training (he's not ready yet). I will be using cloth trainers for him. Pull ups are bad for the environment...
See, I think 19 months is alot different than 1 yrs old...
(but I also hate when parents say "Oh, little Johnny is 43 months.. ) so I figured I'd ask because like I said BIG difference between 19 months and 12 months....

Anyways, at that age with signs of readiness AND being cloth diapered I'd definitely be willing to give it a go. Now I wouldn't try for weeks on end but I'd absolutely be willing to start introductory things at his age. Especially given the ratios and the fact that there is more than one adult present but I also understand that all centers/programs do things differently but that's my two cents.
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happymom 10:07 AM 05-02-2017
Thank you.

I think they'd appreciate early training because I've learned that most of the staff hates his diapers. They are as easy as disposables, but the owner's policy is that soiled cloth diapers need to be kept outside the center, and staff doesn't like to have to take his diapers outside.

I'm going to give him more time to develop before pushing it further. I'll let the staff that wants to help take him when they are able (there are a few willing and a few that think we are all crazy), but until I put in the real grunt work of potty training, I'm going to leave it as is.
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Ariana 10:29 AM 05-02-2017
If the staff is on board then absolutely! Let them know what you are doing at home and they could possibly do it as well. Do they have a bathroom right in the room? If one educator is gone with one infant then they will be over ratio for the other educators.

I had a friend who wanted the infant staff to do certain things when baby was 11 months that they simply could not do and she blamed them for why her kid took so long to potty train. Group care is so different from individualized care and it depends on the program. I worked in the toddler room and we had diapering built into the routine. The diaper room was next to the toilet so a child could go to the toilet but they had to go on their own. At 2.5 they move to the preschool room where bathroom breaks are built in to the routine and they have help at all times while in there.

2.5 is when the majority of kids are ready so group care caters to the majority. Kind of like naps. Some kids drop their nap at 18 months but the majority do not.
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happymom 12:10 PM 05-02-2017
The bathroom is directly across the hall. I might just wait until he moves to the 2s room to train, but I'd hate to wait and miss our window since he is showing so much interest now.

Perhaps I'm worried about that for no reason though.
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TigerLily 07:54 PM 05-03-2017
My cloth diapered little guy was trained at 19 months - no issues and he's 9. I say give it a try
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happymom 11:50 AM 05-04-2017
Originally Posted by TigerLily:
My cloth diapered little guy was trained at 19 months - no issues and he's 9. I say give it a try
Did you use cloth trainers? Or just go straight to undies?
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CityGarden 12:15 PM 05-04-2017
I also used cloth diapers, my daughter walked at 9 months and was fully toilet independent between 18-20 months (I don't recall the exact time). I will say though that I was home full time with her and she was not in group care. We did not actively try to potty train, we did not do elimination communication, etc. she walked early and followed me everywhere I went including the bathroom so instead of keeping the bumbo in the bathroom I purchased a little potty.

We were already watching and loving Signing Time videos from the library so I got a Potty Training DVD with ASL from the library but that was it. We did not push it, it was gradual and felt natural. I used to change her cloth diaper at 11:00pm each night before I went to bed so when we took away the diapers I took my sleeping baby & would put her on the potty at 11:00pm.... she would go and I would take her back to bed and she barely woke up. We co-slept so if she had an accident it would be in my bed hence why I initiated taking her at that time. It's funny dd (10) still wakes each night around 10:30 - 11:00pm to go potty..... so be careful what habits you start

I feel group care is different in terms of potty learning, honestly since the process was so natural for my own child I don't have a "method" to suggest or implement in my program. Part of me wants to help the children in my care use the potty the other part of me feels with so many distractions in a group setting and with such a personal and subjective readiness that is should be the parents responsibility..... regardless I would suggest you ask the center what their policy is and then respect that.
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CityGarden 12:18 PM 05-04-2017
Originally Posted by happymom:
Did you use cloth trainers? Or just go straight to undies?
I cannot speak for Tiger Lilly but my dd wore cloth diapers then the cloth training pants from Hannah Anderson: http://www.hannaandersson.com/pdp.as...simg=37738_HC6 then cotton panties from Hanna Anderson.
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daycarediva 12:21 PM 05-04-2017
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Is your son 1 yrs old as in a NEW 1 yr old or is he closer to 2 yrs old?

I don't know, I don't do extra steps for potty training as I am 1 person doing group care but I understand what you mean about cloth diapering....I DO think kids in cloth recognize the need to urinate long before kids in diapers do. I think they know the feeling of "wet" and "not wet" much earlier than disposable wearers.

I've had multiple cloth diapered kids over the last 4 years and I can say with certainty that all of them trained earlier and easier than those using disposables. About half were boys.

I feel I am still a newbie when it comes to cloth diapers but I have noticed a difference in how cloth diapered kids feel/think/behave in regards to toileting in comparison to disposable wearing kids. (I am still in the observations and fact gathering stages...lol!)

I am also in the school of waiting until a child is ready (your example of tying shoes at 10 is a valid one) however......as group care I just can't do what I would do if I were the parent.

I don't have the time, the hands or the eyes to do it as one (even 2 people) but I am curious how many staff people they do have in your son's room? How many kids and what ages?
I agree with this. I have had trained 18mo's in care. NO negative discipline, running them to the potty every hour, and in no way did early training backfire. Most of my early trained kids wore cloth, my own included.

If he were having actual dry diapers, I would put him on the toilet with changes, which is what I do for every child anyway, and I start them at 18m (can you tell later if the diaper is dry, or if they're just interpreting it as dry)?

If he's actually dry all that time- I would push them to give him more fluids. I pee more than once in 7 hours.
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TigerLily 06:20 AM 05-05-2017
Originally Posted by happymom:
Did you use cloth trainers? Or just go straight to undies?
We went straight to undies. He actually trained accidentally He had a "gramma fed me too many grapes" diaper rash, so he was going diaper free for a bit one day. He started to go and announced "peeing!" I told him that pee goes in the potty, not on the floor and that was that!
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happymom 10:14 AM 05-08-2017
Well, he's doing great.

We switched to undies over the weekend (he's got cloth trainers for daycare) and he calls the potty "paw" and goes immediately when on the toilet.

The cloth trainers (blueberry) I have are not completely water proof but do keep accidents off the floor (will require new pants though), so I sent extras! This way it's easy to see if he's had an accident.

Hoping it goes well, I'm a little nervous!
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Tags:1 year old, parenting styles, potty trained - not
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