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  #1  
Old 01-08-2013, 08:48 AM
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Default Would You Term A Good Child Due To Bad Parents?

I have been contemplating terming a 2.5yo DCB since his first month here. The reason I haven't, is because he is a sweetheart, and the parents are very nice...and I am not desperate to keep him enrolled, I actually have a waitlist for my program. The problem is that his parents are so involved in their careers, they disregard my policies constantly. I have spoke to them in person, handed them a notification letter, and sent them emails. Sometimes situations are taken care of...sometimes not.

July 2012: Enrolled. Several late drop offs, and 1 late pick up.
August 2012: 3 late payments. Have since been set up on their bill pay and payments arrive several days early.
My son had scheduled surgery and I closed early and sent notifications to the parents in the monthly newletter and take home notes. Parents arrived at normal pick up time because their dog had a vet appt. and forgot about my sons surgery.
October 2012: Came sick and tylenol doped on a Wednesday...after his fever spiked, it took his parents 2 hours to come pick him up (I have a 45min limit). Stayed home Thursday. Came back Friday and the same things as Wednesday. He was so ill he needed to go to the hospital.
December 2012: Although it was noted in my Oct, Nov, Dec newsletters AND my contract...they forgot I was closed on Christmas Eve. They guilted me into taking him so they didn't miss work. His mom texted me at 8am saying he would be there at 9am. I said that would be fine, but asked when they would be picking him up so I could make plans with my family for church that afternoon. No response until 11am when she replies asking if her husband told me pick up would be at 4pm. I responded, no, they weren't here and had assumed they weren't coming at this point. No response. At Noon, the dad brings DCB...no apology or anything. He ended up taking the day off to work on their furnace and said he would be back at 4pm to get him. Shortly after he arrived the mom texts me apologizing saying they need to work on their communication.
January 2012: New contracts were emailed and given out at pick up in December. Rates have changed, and their bill pay arrived 1 time at the new rate, but this weeks payment came at the old rate. They have yet to return the new contract. Begining this month, as noted via email & newsletters, I have closed the upstairs to daycare and will only be using the lower level (which requires use of the other entrance of our home) On the first day of the change, the mom is banging on my locked front door claiming to be unaware of the change.

In addition, he has arrived several times with food and without proper outdoor attire, despite numerous reminders.

At this point, I don't feel there is anything I can do to get the parents on board with my policies...but I hate to term such a good child He's such a cheerful boy, very well mannered, great listener, and plays well with others. And the parents are nice, even gave me a Christmas card with a very generous starbucks gift card in it.

What would you do?
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  #2  
Old 01-08-2013, 08:52 AM
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I just did

The DCK was easy going lovable fun kid. Parents just didn't get it.

Best thing I ever did!!!!
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  #3  
Old 01-08-2013, 08:55 AM
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........................next!!!!!!!
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  #4  
Old 01-08-2013, 09:00 AM
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Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
........................next!!!!!!!
Pretty much! There are other cheerful kids out there with parents who will follow the rules
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  #5  
Old 01-08-2013, 09:05 AM
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That's what I was leaning towards...just needed to hear it from someone else...ok...so what should I put in the term letter? I've never had to term someone I liked before, so don't want it to sound too mean
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  #6  
Old 01-08-2013, 09:08 AM
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Ultimately, you arerelying on the parents for your income, not the sweet child. If you can't count on them, the niceness of the child really doesn't matter.

If you worked in an office for a really really great boss, but he forgot to pay you, kept you late, expected you early, would you keep doing it because he was nice?

Move on!!!! They clearly don't have respect for what you do. Eliminate the stress from your life!!!!
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  #7  
Old 01-08-2013, 09:13 AM
AnneCordelia AnneCordelia is offline
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The only reasons i have termed, to date, were because of the parents and not the kids.
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  #8  
Old 01-08-2013, 09:17 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PolkaTots View Post
That's what I was leaning towards...just needed to hear it from someone else...ok...so what should I put in the term letter? I've never had to term someone I liked before, so don't want it to sound too mean
Dear DCP

Based on numerous differences between us, I feel that it is best, at this time to discontinue our child care services agreement.

The last day I am willing to provide care is January xx, 2013.

I have included the number to the local CCR&R office to assist you in your search for a more suitable program. I appreciate your services but I must do what is in the best interests of my business.

If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me.

Sincerely,

Provider


Something short and sweet. Most times when it gets to this point, the family already knows full well that things aren't working out.
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  #9  
Old 01-08-2013, 09:25 AM
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2 words. Buh Bye LOL! I would do the letter BC just wrote and I would attach a copy of your first post with all of their infractions. Just in case they're totally clueless. P.S. don't let anyone guilt you into working especially on a holiday. Good luck!
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  #10  
Old 01-08-2013, 09:32 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PolkaTots View Post
I have been contemplating terming a 2.5yo DCB since his first month here. The reason I haven't, is because he is a sweetheart, and the parents are very nice...and I am not desperate to keep him enrolled, I actually have a waitlist for my program. The problem is that his parents are so involved in their careers, they disregard my policies constantly. I have spoke to them in person, handed them a notification letter, and sent them emails. Sometimes situations are taken care of...sometimes not.

July 2012: Enrolled. Several late drop offs, and 1 late pick up.
August 2012: 3 late payments. Have since been set up on their bill pay and payments arrive several days early.
My son had scheduled surgery and I closed early and sent notifications to the parents in the monthly newletter and take home notes. Parents arrived at normal pick up time because their dog had a vet appt. and forgot about my sons surgery.
October 2012: Came sick and tylenol doped on a Wednesday...after his fever spiked, it took his parents 2 hours to come pick him up (I have a 45min limit). Stayed home Thursday. Came back Friday and the same things as Wednesday. He was so ill he needed to go to the hospital.
December 2012: Although it was noted in my Oct, Nov, Dec newsletters AND my contract...they forgot I was closed on Christmas Eve. They guilted me into taking him so they didn't miss work. His mom texted me at 8am saying he would be there at 9am. I said that would be fine, but asked when they would be picking him up so I could make plans with my family for church that afternoon. No response until 11am when she replies asking if her husband told me pick up would be at 4pm. I responded, no, they weren't here and had assumed they weren't coming at this point. No response. At Noon, the dad brings DCB...no apology or anything. He ended up taking the day off to work on their furnace and said he would be back at 4pm to get him. Shortly after he arrived the mom texts me apologizing saying they need to work on their communication.
January 2012: New contracts were emailed and given out at pick up in December. Rates have changed, and their bill pay arrived 1 time at the new rate, but this weeks payment came at the old rate. They have yet to return the new contract. Begining this month, as noted via email & newsletters, I have closed the upstairs to daycare and will only be using the lower level (which requires use of the other entrance of our home) On the first day of the change, the mom is banging on my locked front door claiming to be unaware of the change.

In addition, he has arrived several times with food and without proper outdoor attire, despite numerous reminders.

At this point, I don't feel there is anything I can do to get the parents on board with my policies...but I hate to term such a good child He's such a cheerful boy, very well mannered, great listener, and plays well with others. And the parents are nice, even gave me a Christmas card with a very generous starbucks gift card in it.

What would you do?
wow....I am surprised that this family has lasted this long with you. I would have already said good-bye...
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  #11  
Old 01-08-2013, 09:42 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by daycare View Post
wow....I am surprised that this family has lasted this long with you. I would have already said good-bye...
She was a sorority sister from college...
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  #12  
Old 01-08-2013, 09:43 AM
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Perfect!!! Thank you!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
Dear DCP

Based on numerous differences between us, I feel that it is best, at this time to discontinue our child care services agreement.

The last day I am willing to provide care is January xx, 2013.

I have included the number to the local CCR&R office to assist you in your search for a more suitable program. I appreciate your services but I must do what is in the best interests of my business.

If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me.

Sincerely,

Provider


Something short and sweet. Most times when it gets to this point, the family already knows full well that things aren't working out.
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  #13  
Old 01-08-2013, 10:28 AM
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MarinaVanessa MarinaVanessa is offline
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Yes good luck with this. I am always up for working things out with DCP's but only if I see improvements. You can simply term if you are not willing to risk things continuing like they are or you can put them on a probationary period of 2 months. If they do ANYTHING against your policies it's immediate termination. At the end of the two months you can revisit the probationary period idea and extend it or not. Show them you're not playing games and not messing around.

The thing is you must remember that some DCP's will push and push and test whether they can get away with it or not and you teach people how to treat you. I would have enforced late payment fees, no-pay-no-stay policy, issued late pick-up fees, harassed the parents at work until they came to pick up their child for the surgery or taken DCK to the surgery with me and charged late pick up fees from the time that they needed to have picked their child up until the time that they arrived to pick the child up AT THE HOSPITAL, terminated for the dope-and-drop, would not have accepted the child on Christmas Eve (and now you see why, late drop-off, waste of and disregard of your time), no contract=no child care, I wouldn't let them in with food and would imediately send them back out the door to the car for child to either it it there or leave it, no proper clothing=no care or I go out and buy him clothes and it stays at my house and DCP's reimburse me for it.

I hardly ever have issues with the kids and even when I did ultimately the reason why I termed was due to the parents.
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  #14  
Old 01-08-2013, 10:52 AM
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I would have already termed.

Have you warned them? I mean, do they KNOW that you are not happy with EVERYTHING you listed? I haD a tendency to down play how upset I get with dcp's and then my dh pointed out "Well, duh, if they don't know all of your nice notices and newsletters mean NOTHING." So I have actually said to dcp's "This is unacceptable and will not be tolerated." on NUMEROUS occassions.

If they have been sufficiently warned, and you have spoken to them A ND given them written warnings, etc then absolutely term.

I would be willing to bet this dcp disregards your policies either bc thinks that they don't apply to her with a past personal relationship or that she doesn't understand that she is on thin ice.
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  #15  
Old 01-08-2013, 10:57 AM
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While I haven't done it yet, I will be terming a dck as soon as I find a replacement.

This child is the dream dck. Parents are my worst nightmare.

Best of luck to you.
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  #16  
Old 01-08-2013, 11:03 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wahmof3 View Post
I just did

The DCK was easy going lovable fun kid. Parents just didn't get it.

Best thing I ever did!!!!
Ditto. I just did too. While it creates drama because the parents seem to always get pissed off when they get termed, no matter how professionally you do it... It still was worth it.

LOL, actually, I just did it twice!

Last edited by EchoMom; 01-08-2013 at 11:03 AM. Reason: Not done
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  #17  
Old 01-08-2013, 11:34 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EchoMom View Post
Ditto. I just did too. While it creates drama because the parents seem to always get pissed off when they get termed, no matter how professionally you do it... It still was worth it.

LOL, actually, I just did it twice!
hahahah aint that the truth.... No matter how professional you are they always seem to get mad.

I try to always push it into their court so that they leave....lol meaning, I will keep hitting them with more and more late fees that they have racked up but can't pay. So they just don't come back.....lol That way I don't have to do anything...

But this has not happened in a really long time...
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  #18  
Old 01-08-2013, 12:40 PM
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I have termed because of parents and kids. If it is not working for me, bye! bye!
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  #19  
Old 01-08-2013, 01:22 PM
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Yes. The surgery thing would have ended it for me!
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