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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Will I Get Over Feeling Burned Out?
Unregistered 11:02 AM 03-31-2014
I could really use some advice if any of you have been through this before! For about 2 weeks now, I have just been feeling so burned out and I'm so ashamed to admit it. I got into this profession because I love kids but the way I've been acting/feeling lately, you wouldn't know it. I have a great group of kids (and I'm so lucky to have them), but lately everything they do annoys me and I'm so crabby all the time. I hardly have any motivation to plan activities for the kids and I feel terrible about it. I know these kids deserve better.

Something that I really struggle with is working by myself. I feel very trapped and alone during the day. I would like to hire someone to work with, but right now I can't afford that.

I feel like a terrible provider!! Have any of you gone through this and have any advice? I would greatly appreciate it!
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taylorw1210 11:12 AM 03-31-2014
I am a relatively new provider (just passed my first year being open) so no personal experience advice from me - however, do you think taking a personal day so that you have a long weekend to yourself would help? I spent many years being a single mom to 4 kids, and found that making time for myself was a necessity. I continue to do so even now that I am in a healthy relationship and have a partner in parenting, and it really "recharges" my battery when I'm feeling burnt out.
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llpa 11:14 AM 03-31-2014
Even tho I am a new provider it doesn't take much to start feeling burned out. I found that this site and forum helps so much to just have others validate you. You should join. Are your parents giving you a hard time? Or are you just feeling not motivated? I love Easter so I finally feel excited again to get some projects going etc. Can you get away for some me time in the evenings? Could you sit down with a good book at lunch? Get the kids and go outside for a while?
I hope you start feeling better! Please join the forum! We are on here thruout the day supporting each other. Wish I had more to offer!
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KiddieCahoots 11:28 AM 03-31-2014
Try not to be so hard on yourself. Your only human, and yes....most of us at one time or another go through this.

Pat yourself on the back, you've taken that first step by reaching out.

When I get down, I try breaking up my thoughts, and just concentrating on one at a time. This helps me to lessen that overwhelming feeling.

When was the last time you had a vacation?
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Leigh 11:47 AM 03-31-2014
Consider seeing your physician. If these feelings are uncharacteristic, there could be a medical condition contributing to them.
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melilley 11:57 AM 03-31-2014
I feel the same way, not all the time, but off and on. I was so ready to quit and close last week and so far this week, I'm back to liking this job...lol. When it's that time of the month, it gets worse! I also feel that this winter (if there's cold weather and/or snow where you are) has really contributed to the burnout feeling! You are not alone

I too work alone and wish I could have someone here to help, but that's not an option. I agree with pp, register here and visit when you can. It has really helped me. Even though most of us don't know each other in person, you can really get to know everyone and vent, brag, get advice, etc.. it really can help!
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CraftyMom 12:30 PM 03-31-2014
We all go through it! Especially working alone with no one to talk to! That was one of the hardest things for me, having no co-workers. This forum is great for sharing, giving/receiving advice, venting. For pretty much all situations someone here has been there, done that and has advice!

It will pass, it's easy to get in a rut with dck's behaviors or parents' behaviors, and not having anyone to tell if you are doing things right or wrong makes it worse. Stick around here, you'll feel better after you see that everyone else has gone through the same stuff!

I remember when I joined just a couple months ago, I was so relieved to find out I wasn't alone in what I was dealing with!

This time of year is horrible, sunny weather will bring better days
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Crazy8 01:31 PM 03-31-2014
I went thru that once or twice over the years and have gotten over it so it is possible. Somewhere on this board is a great post about it I think, maybe someone can find it!

There were a few things that I feel worked for me... First was getting more sleep. I was always a night owl, but I think with age came a need for more sleep and I couldn't stay up till midnight, 1am anymore - I was tired and cranky every day!! Believe it or not once I started getting more sleep so much of my patience that I thought was gone forever returned. Another thing that helped was giving up some of the stress of "doing everything" every day. I had a daily schedule and I worked so hard to stick with it and make sure we had plenty of activities for each day. I gave a lot of that up and became a little more play based. We still do fun things, some planned, some not, but I don't spend hours worrying and stressing over it anymore!
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e.j. 02:06 PM 03-31-2014
I find the feeling comes and goes in cycles. It used to really throw me when I first started doing child care but now, after 18 years, I recognize these phases as something that will pass with a little time and patience. I just try to ride the wave until it does.

Instead of planning a craft activity for each day as I usually do, we play with Play Doh or paint instead. No real planning necessary. If the weather is nice, we have days - or an entire week - when we play outside all day instead of doing a planned activity. Sometimes, just being outside in the fresh air helps my mood. I've also found that turning the radio on and singing along helps my mood. The kids will hear a song and yell, "Hey! That song is on the radio in my car!" and we'll sing and dance to it together. Hang in there; it'll pass before you know it.
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Josiegirl 02:14 PM 03-31-2014
Wells can run dry if they're never filled up. Maybe you're not doing enough for you!?
It's hard to stay enthused all the time; care giving is a hard draining job.
Sometimes batteries can be recharged by time off, time away, indulgences, even getting re-excited by attending some workshops or meeting with other providers. Or what about a class for you? Nothing to do with kids, but something you'd like to learn how to do? New hobby maybe? Start a walking group after work, or wine-tasting or book club, whatever strikes your fancy; something to help you feel you're more than constantly changing diapers, wiping noses, and serving children. Are there any local meet-up groups?
I've been in burn-out mode quite a few times over the past 30+ years and somehow I always find my way through to the other side.
A lot can depend on your group too. The group I have right now is wonderful, all girls, pretty low stress group.(for the most part) Last year I had 2 dcbs, headed off to K last fall, couldn't stand to be here together. That was a rough year and I could not wait until school started.
Take a good look at your group and see if there is something specific going on that is driving you crazy then see if you can fix it.
Good luck and hope your feelings pass soon. It's not a good feeling.
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Unregistered 05:06 PM 03-31-2014
Thank you everyone for all your kind words and advice! It's nice to know that I'm not alone. Some of you mentioned vacation time and possibly taking more time off. So I'm just wondering, how many days off (paid/unpaid) do you take per year, not including holidays?
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EntropyControlSpecialist 05:22 PM 03-31-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Thank you everyone for all your kind words and advice! It's nice to know that I'm not alone. Some of you mentioned vacation time and possibly taking more time off. So I'm just wondering, how many days off (paid/unpaid) do you take per year, not including holidays?
I take off 16 paid days including holidays.
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CraftyMom 07:32 PM 03-31-2014
I have 11 holidays/days off plus a week vacation. There are also a few Fridays in the summer I am closing early
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DaisyMamma 03:08 AM 04-01-2014
You need some time off or an assistant. Join a provider association in your area to make friends, then you can get together during the week with your groups.

Last spring I had 3 challenging kids. I got so burned out though, that a vacation didn't help. I struggled through the summer and then went to part time for fall. So I was closed TR. By then 2 of the kids were gone. It has taken until now that I'm going back to full time. I will be full again in two weeks but this time I hired help. I will still have two days off eventhough their in my house I can come and go as I need to, take my dd out or whatever. Hopefully I can handle it this time. And yes, it was a huge financial struggle.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 05:55 AM 04-01-2014
I just went through an entire month like this. It was both the parents being demanding and the children misbehaving (some). I am bouncing back slowly now. I just had to wait it out and take care of me in the evenings.
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My3cents 11:04 AM 04-01-2014
Originally Posted by Crazy8:
I went thru that once or twice over the years and have gotten over it so it is possible. Somewhere on this board is a great post about it I think, maybe someone can find it!

There were a few things that I feel worked for me... First was getting more sleep. I was always a night owl, but I think with age came a need for more sleep and I couldn't stay up till midnight, 1am anymore - I was tired and cranky every day!! Believe it or not once I started getting more sleep so much of my patience that I thought was gone forever returned. Another thing that helped was giving up some of the stress of "doing everything" every day. I had a daily schedule and I worked so hard to stick with it and make sure we had plenty of activities for each day. I gave a lot of that up and became a little more play based. We still do fun things, some planned, some not, but I don't spend hours worrying and stressing over it anymore!

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Annalee 11:50 AM 04-01-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I could really use some advice if any of you have been through this before! For about 2 weeks now, I have just been feeling so burned out and I'm so ashamed to admit it. I got into this profession because I love kids but the way I've been acting/feeling lately, you wouldn't know it. I have a great group of kids (and I'm so lucky to have them), but lately everything they do annoys me and I'm so crabby all the time. I hardly have any motivation to plan activities for the kids and I feel terrible about it. I know these kids deserve better.

Something that I really struggle with is working by myself. I feel very trapped and alone during the day. I would like to hire someone to work with, but right now I can't afford that.

I feel like a terrible provider!! Have any of you gone through this and have any advice? I would greatly appreciate it!
Family child care can be isolating. I am usually the one who can stay on the positive end of things but seems like since the beginning of the year, I have taken 1 step forward and 2 back mostly in issues outside of dc. These issues seem minor when I go to mention them, so I won't, but these issues are very significant to me and cause me sleepless nights and too much worry. Many posts have mentioned "taking care of YOU" and I think that is the key along with "letting things go". I allow myself to become mediator to everyone/everything and sometimes I CAN'T fix everything or everyone which is difficult for me because I want everyone to be happy. Now that I have beat around the bush about my life circumstances, I think I will make plans for the wknd with some local FCC providers at conference to chill out and attempt to enjoy myself......
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