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Old 06-19-2014, 08:18 AM
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Default On Potty Training Policies and a "Potty Watch"....

So, I have a few kiddos in the potty training stage right now.

I have a 2yo dcg that will regularly tell me when she has to go, and we do - but she does not 100% of the time and her mom is okay with that. She just turned 2.
I have a 13 mo. old dcb who also tells me when he has to pee maybe 2x a day, and he goes - but obviously has the rest of the day where he does not.

I have a nearly 3 yo dcb that never communicates when he needs to go. Sometimes if others are, he will decide he needs to and will go - but never on his own does he tell me he needs to go. The parents have been "potty training" since the day the boy turned 2, and he's now almost 3. They insist that he does "perfectly" at home when they set him on the toilet every hour. I keep telling them that the boy needs to verbally communicate with me when he has to go. We do have a potty schedule for the kiddos in the potty training stage, and we will take bathroom breaks 4x a day - but it is not an hour apart and I am not willing to do that - I don't even do that for my own 2.5 yo daughter who I am hoping will PT soon.

He was brought with a potty watch today that is set to every hour and I was instructed to place him on the potty every hour. Uhm... no.

I do not currently have a potty training policy in my handbook but will be writing one up very soon to hand out to all the families who have children who are coming up on potty training. What is your potty training policy and how would you handle the particular family that wants me to place their son on the potty every hour?
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Old 06-19-2014, 08:23 AM
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Originally Posted by taylorw1210 View Post
So, I have a few kiddos in the potty training stage right now.

I have a 2yo dcg that will regularly tell me when she has to go, and we do - but she does not 100% of the time and her mom is okay with that. She just turned 2.
I have a 23 mo. old dcb who also tells me when he has to pee maybe 2x a day, and he goes - but obviously has the rest of the day where he does not.

I have a nearly 3 yo dcb that never communicates when he needs to go. Sometimes if others are, he will decide he needs to and will go - but never on his own does he tell me he needs to go. The parents have been "potty training" since the day the boy turned 2, and he's now almost 3. They insist that he does "perfectly" at home when they set him on the toilet every hour. I keep telling them that the boy needs to verbally communicate with me when he has to go. We do have a potty schedule for the kiddos in the potty training stage, and we will take bathroom breaks 4x a day - but it is not an hour apart and I am not willing to do that - I don't even do that for my own 2.5 yo daughter who I am hoping will PT soon.

He was brought with a potty watch today that is set to every hour and I was instructed to place him on the potty every hour. Uhm... no.

I do not currently have a potty training policy in my handbook but will be writing one up very soon to hand out to all the families who have children who are coming up on potty training. What is your potty training policy and how would you handle the particular family that wants me to place their son on the potty every hour?
Here is a great place to start.... LOTS of great info and a nice way to explain to parents "our end" of the situation.

http://www.daycare.com/nannyde/potty...#comment-24850
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Old 06-19-2014, 08:25 AM
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Here is a great place to start.... LOTS of great info and a nice way to explain to parents "our end" of the situation.

http://www.daycare.com/nannyde/potty...#comment-24850
Thank you. I already have this up in one of my browser's tabs and planned on using it to create my own letter to my families... however, I wanted some other provider's insight, too.

The family that is having an issue is starting to make me feel like I am intentionally not assisting with potty training. However, I do not feel like the boy is ready and putting him on the potty every hour is not going to assist with his ability to tell me when he needs to go - he needs to be able to communicate the feeling of needing to go and he does not.
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Old 06-19-2014, 08:50 AM
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ooohhh the parents of the almost 3 yo sound JUST like a family I dealt with a few years ago. They announced about a week before her 2nd birthday that they were going to potty train her "the day she turned 2" and would be coming in underwear starting then.

Um, no.

Among other things, the child displayed ZERO readiness signs. Zip, zilch, nada. I put my foot down on the underwear so they did pull ups instead

For a year and a half we fought, I mean dealt with, this. I didn't push her here but I offered, in my own style of laissez-faire potty training. There came a point where the mere mention of a potty trip would send her into hysterics. I found out as the 18 months wore on that she would get time outs for having "accidents" and would have to sit on the potty for 30 minutes or more until she peed. Then repeat 30 minutes later I backed off COMPLETELY aside from asking her at transition times if she needed to go. She regressed in other ways in the same time frame and I felt (still feel) horrible about the way she was being treated at home. Still had ZERO readiness signs.

The parents were LIVID. They posted on facebook about how daycare was sabotaging her training and how she was perfect at home, etc etc and their friends commiserated with them and told them to talk to daycare and "educate" the babysitter (GAG) and I passive-aggressively posted lots of links to potty training tips

Finally, one day when she was just shy of 3.5 she announced that she had to pee, and she went to the bathroom and sat and peed and managed her own clothing with minimal help too. And within a week I told her parents that she was doing fabulous and was ready for underwear. She never looked back.

All that to say....you're right, they're misinformed, keep it up. You're doing the right thing.
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Old 06-19-2014, 08:52 AM
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Originally Posted by taylorw1210 View Post
Thank you. I already have this up in one of my browser's tabs and planned on using it to create my own letter to my families... however, I wanted some other provider's insight, too.

The family that is having an issue is starting to make me feel like I am intentionally not assisting with potty training. However, I do not feel like the boy is ready and putting him on the potty every hour is not going to assist with his ability to tell me when he needs to go - he needs to be able to communicate the feeling of needing to go and he does not.
They just want to stop buying diapers and you can't come up with words that are going to make them happy other than they can stop bringing diapers. If it is causing enough problems that you think they may pull and you can't afford to loose them then maybe supply the diapers yourself. Most parents don't really care if they are toilet trained. Some want the really early toilet training so they can pronounce the kid gifted but MOST just don't want to buy diapers. I keep a huge stock of diapers in my inventory and if it becomes too much conflict I just supply them.
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Old 06-19-2014, 09:17 AM
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They just want to stop buying diapers and you can't come up with words that are going to make them happy other than they can stop bringing diapers. If it is causing enough problems that you think they may pull and you can't afford to loose them then maybe supply the diapers yourself. Most parents don't really care if they are toilet trained. Some want the really early toilet training so they can pronounce the kid gifted but MOST just don't want to buy diapers. I keep a huge stock of diapers in my inventory and if it becomes too much conflict I just supply them.
I think the big motivating factor is pre-k. They are wanting to send him to a headstart program in the fall that requires he be potty trained to do so. This is their first child, they are super eager to turn him into an overachiever, and are helicopter parents. I am not concerned about losing him as I can easily fill the spot. I am however kicking myself in the butt for not thinking ahead and having a potty training policy in my handbook.
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Old 06-19-2014, 09:29 AM
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I think the big motivating factor is pre-k. They are wanting to send him to a headstart program in the fall that requires he be potty trained to do so. This is their first child, they are super eager to turn him into an overachiever, and are helicopter parents. I am not concerned about losing him as I can easily fill the spot. I am however kicking myself in the butt for not thinking ahead and having a potty training policy in my handbook.
You don't have to have something written BEFOREHAND to deal with this now.

Just tell the parents that you are GROUP care not ONE child care and what they are asking you is physically impossible to manage.

Then suggest they take a week off, do the hard work themselves and once the child has mastered at least the verbal portion of this process, you will gladly step in and ASSIST or SUPPORT but not DO the WORK for the kid or for the parents.

If they insist, tell them sure but you will need to hire another adult to manage his individual needs and that since they are the ones insisting he master this skill, they will need to pay for said assistant.

fwiw~ Head Start does NOT require children to be potty trained before enrollment.
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Old 06-19-2014, 09:46 AM
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You don't have to have something written BEFOREHAND to deal with this now.

Just tell the parents that you are GROUP care not ONE child care and what they are asking you is physically impossible to manage.

Then suggest they take a week off, do the hard work themselves and once the child has mastered at least the verbal portion of this process, you will gladly step in and ASSIST or SUPPORT but not DO the WORK for the kid or for the parents.

If they insist, tell them sure but you will need to hire another adult to manage his individual needs and that since they are the ones insisting he master this skill, they will need to pay for said assistant.

fwiw~ Head Start does NOT require children to be potty trained before enrollment.
Hmm... that's interesting. They have told me the program they are looking into requires a child be potty trained and the program they told me they toured was a headstart program.

I am on a week long vacation next week, and some of my kids are gone already for the week - so I think I'll start working on a notice for a policy addition in regards to potty training...
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Old 06-19-2014, 09:48 AM
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I just asked the little boy if he "felt pee pee coming" (because we have not been going every hour when the watch sings). He thought for a second and then he looked at his watch and said, "Nope! TWO MINUTES!"
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Old 06-19-2014, 09:50 AM
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I just asked the little boy if he "felt pee pee coming" (because we have not been going every hour when the watch sings). He thought for a second and then he looked at his watch and said, "Nope! TWO MINUTES!"
Actually--here's your middle ground if you want one: When the watch sings, ASK if he needs to go to the bathroom and would like to sit on the potty. Then respect his answer and let it go unti the next hour or the next bathroom break. At the bathroom breaks encourage him to try. Then you can have a happy middle ground for the parents.
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Old 06-19-2014, 09:52 AM
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Actually--here's your middle ground if you want one: When the watch sings, ASK if he needs to go to the bathroom and would like to sit on the potty. Then respect his answer and let it go unti the next hour or the next bathroom break. At the bathroom breaks encourage him to try. Then you can have a happy middle ground for the parents.
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Old 06-19-2014, 10:14 AM
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Here is a copy of my policy that I have for my parents:


Potty Training Policies

The potty training process is an exciting time for everyone! It can also be a difficult and sometimes frustrating transition for a child. Potty training should begin with you at home, during its initial stages. When you feel your child is ready to being using the toilet full-time, let me know and we will discuss his/her readiness. If we both agree that the child is ready (can complete the entire toileting process by themselves), the following Monday they can begin wearing pull-ups at daycare. Your child's time in training pants, is not a substitution for potty training at home, your child should thoroughly understand the process of toileting before they wear training pants to daycare.

Before your child begins to use the toilet at daycare, they MUST have the following established:

▪ Be aware of bowel and bladder fullness. (Before, not after elimination).
▪ Have the muscle development to control elimination.
▪ Have the language to signal the need to the caregivers.
▪ Have the gross and fine motor skills to get to the toilet on time, remove clothing, and then to actually use the toilet, put their clothes back on and wash their hands. Your child should be able to complete the ENTIRE TOILETING PROCESS independently, before beginning at daycare.
▪ A solid handwashing procedure. Here at daycare, I teach children to wet their hands, rub with soap for 30 seconds or more (we sing a few different songs so they know the timing), and then rinse. Practicing good hand-washing at home is important for the health and wellbeing of your child!

Please remember to send your child in clothes that will assist in their using the potty independently. No tight clothing, long shirts or dresses, belts, buttons, buckles, overalls, tights, ect. Independently dressing and undressing is part of being potty trained!

Your child will need to wear pull-ups for two-weeks without having an accident before they can wear underwear to daycare. Children will not be allowed to wear pull-ups if they are using them as diapers.

I can not practice “toilet timing” which involves bringing the child to the toilet every X amount of time, and catching them before the urinate. This is a completely different concept than toilet training, and is not very effective and impossible to do while caring for the other children.

In this daycare, a child is not considered toilet trained if they are still having frequent accidents. Children who have more than one accident every two weeks will be expected to wear pull-ups, until they remain accident free for two weeks. Under no circumstances will a child who is having frequent accidents be allowed to wear underwear.


Please do not send your child in underwear until they have both bowel and bladder control established. Sometimes a child is ready at home for a period of time before they are ready at daycare. There is no shaming a child for accidents, and I will not force or push potty training here before they are ready!
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Old 06-19-2014, 10:19 AM
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Hmm... that's interesting. They have told me the program they are looking into requires a child be potty trained and the program they told me they toured was a headstart program.
Both of these documents show that Head Start does NOT require kids to be trained. The first document is from CA specifically but HS is a federal program and most HS's follow the same federal guidelines. The second link is actually from Head Start and on page 26 talks about toileting and the training process.

http://psscfs.sacramentoheadstart.ne...ning-po.pr.pdf

http://www.esc16.net/users/0001/docs...h%20Safety.pdf (page 26)

HTH
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Old 06-19-2014, 10:32 AM
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Both of these documents show that Head Start does NOT require kids to be trained. The first document is from CA specifically but HS is a federal program and most HS's follow the same federal guidelines. The second link is actually from Head Start and on page 26 talks about toileting and the training process.

http://psscfs.sacramentoheadstart.ne...ning-po.pr.pdf

http://www.esc16.net/users/0001/docs...h%20Safety.pdf (page 26)

HTH
If they have a deadline to train then it's best to take time off work and train him to say the words "I have to go potty" BEFORE he has to go.

I can't tell you how many providers get caught up in preschool ready potty training. It doesn't have a thing to do with daycare. Don't allow them to make it. Have your policies in place and time frames in place and stick to it.
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Old 06-19-2014, 10:48 AM
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Here is a copy of my policy that I have for my parents:


Potty Training Policies

The potty training process is an exciting time for everyone! It can also be a difficult and sometimes frustrating transition for a child. Potty training should begin with you at home, during its initial stages. When you feel your child is ready to being using the toilet full-time, let me know and we will discuss his/her readiness. If we both agree that the child is ready (can complete the entire toileting process by themselves), the following Monday they can begin wearing pull-ups at daycare. Your child's time in training pants, is not a substitution for potty training at home, your child should thoroughly understand the process of toileting before they wear training pants to daycare.

Before your child begins to use the toilet at daycare, they MUST have the following established:

▪ Be aware of bowel and bladder fullness. (Before, not after elimination).
▪ Have the muscle development to control elimination.
▪ Have the language to signal the need to the caregivers.
▪ Have the gross and fine motor skills to get to the toilet on time, remove clothing, and then to actually use the toilet, put their clothes back on and wash their hands. Your child should be able to complete the ENTIRE TOILETING PROCESS independently, before beginning at daycare.
▪ A solid handwashing procedure. Here at daycare, I teach children to wet their hands, rub with soap for 30 seconds or more (we sing a few different songs so they know the timing), and then rinse. Practicing good hand-washing at home is important for the health and wellbeing of your child!

Please remember to send your child in clothes that will assist in their using the potty independently. No tight clothing, long shirts or dresses, belts, buttons, buckles, overalls, tights, ect. Independently dressing and undressing is part of being potty trained!

Your child will need to wear pull-ups for two-weeks without having an accident before they can wear underwear to daycare. Children will not be allowed to wear pull-ups if they are using them as diapers.

I can not practice “toilet timing” which involves bringing the child to the toilet every X amount of time, and catching them before the urinate. This is a completely different concept than toilet training, and is not very effective and impossible to do while caring for the other children.

In this daycare, a child is not considered toilet trained if they are still having frequent accidents. Children who have more than one accident every two weeks will be expected to wear pull-ups, until they remain accident free for two weeks. Under no circumstances will a child who is having frequent accidents be allowed to wear underwear.


Please do not send your child in underwear until they have both bowel and bladder control established. Sometimes a child is ready at home for a period of time before they are ready at daycare. There is no shaming a child for accidents, and I will not force or push potty training here before they are ready!
Love this! This is exactly what I'm looking to give to my parents. Thanks so much for sharing your policy.
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Old 06-19-2014, 11:09 AM
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Love this! This is exactly what I'm looking to give to my parents. Thanks so much for sharing your policy.
You're welcome- I know I used others to help put this together, I can't take credit for it, but it has been a great help. I did have 1 family leave during their 2 week time because they wanted to send their non-verbal, very socially-young 21 month old in underwear- I said good riddance!
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Old 06-19-2014, 12:40 PM
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ooohhh the parents of the almost 3 yo sound JUST like a family I dealt with a few years ago. They announced about a week before her 2nd birthday that they were going to potty train her "the day she turned 2" and would be coming in underwear starting then.

Um, no.

Among other things, the child displayed ZERO readiness signs. Zip, zilch, nada. I put my foot down on the underwear so they did pull ups instead

For a year and a half we fought, I mean dealt with, this. I didn't push her here but I offered, in my own style of laissez-faire potty training. There came a point where the mere mention of a potty trip would send her into hysterics. I found out as the 18 months wore on that she would get time outs for having "accidents" and would have to sit on the potty for 30 minutes or more until she peed. Then repeat 30 minutes later I backed off COMPLETELY aside from asking her at transition times if she needed to go. She regressed in other ways in the same time frame and I felt (still feel) horrible about the way she was being treated at home. Still had ZERO readiness signs.

The parents were LIVID. They posted on facebook about how daycare was sabotaging her training and how she was perfect at home, etc etc and their friends commiserated with them and told them to talk to daycare and "educate" the babysitter (GAG) and I passive-aggressively posted lots of links to potty training tips

Finally, one day when she was just shy of 3.5 she announced that she had to pee, and she went to the bathroom and sat and peed and managed her own clothing with minimal help too. And within a week I told her parents that she was doing fabulous and was ready for underwear. She never looked back.

All that to say....you're right, they're misinformed, keep it up. You're doing the right thing.
That would have been their LAST day at my house.
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Old 06-19-2014, 01:07 PM
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That would have been their LAST day at my house.
It almost was. It was a very near thing. If clients were easier to get...if they hadn't had two kids....if DH hadn't been out of work at the time...
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Old 06-19-2014, 02:52 PM
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Here's a couple things I have about potty training. One, from my Welcome Packet:

Potty Training
• Potty training is an important step in development in a toddler’s life. I will get the children accustomed to being around the potty area as they approach 24 months – let them flush toilet paper down the toilet, change their diaper while they’re standing up, let them sit on the toilet or potty chair – before they actively start potty training.
• Once the child starts peeing in the potty, then we can start actively potty training. I use stickers and praise as rewards for going potty. Sometimes it is helpful to encourage a child by letting them wear pull-ups while potty training, because it further separates them from the old diaper habit. Just make sure the pull-ups have Velcro sides in order to make changing them easier.
• As they make further progress, you may want to buy a few pairs of underwear with their favorite characters on them, and tell your child they will get to wear them once they are able to keep their pull-up or diaper dry all day (they will likely need a pull-up/diaper at nap and bed time until they’re around 3 years old).
• Once they are keeping their pull-up or diaper dry during their waking hours, we can transition to underwear. Please bring several pairs of underwear and changes of clothes during this time, and restock them every day as needed if there are accidents.
• Continue to keep a supply of pull-ups or diapers here for nap time

And this is from my Policy Handbook:

Learning to Use the Toilet

I will take steps to slowly introduce children to the process of potty training all throughout the school year.

I will take a more active role in helping a child learn to use the toilet once you and I agree that the child is physically ready.

I will use the following methods to help your child learn to use the toilet:
• giving the child incentives (stickers, stamps, etc.)
• bringing the child to the toilet often
• helping the child get excited about using the toilet
• reading books about learning to use the toilet

I will use the following terms:
• urine will be called: pee, pee-pee
• urinating will be called: going potty, using the restroom, going to the bathroom
• a bowel movement will be called: poo-poo, poop

You will supply me with extra clothing and training pants while I am helping your child to use the toilet.

I will provide a "potty chair" while I am helping your child to use the toilet. It may be used as a stand-alone potty chair on the floor, or a seat that fits on top of the regular toilet seat.
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Old 06-19-2014, 03:22 PM
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I am a little lost as to why placing this child on the potty every hour is a problem? Do you work with a large group by yourself or is your bathroom upstairs? I only ask because we have two in our group that are potty training and we place them on the potty every 20-30 mins. One is age 2.5 and the other is not even 2 yet and both are doing great. Neither one really verbalizes when they need to go. We just watch for signs and sometimes watch the clock. They have been doing this for over 2 weeks now and they are both in underwear with rarely an accident. It does take ALOT of time and patience having to constantly do this but its a method that has worked for us. Just a thought.
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Old 06-19-2014, 03:33 PM
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I am a little lost as to why placing this child on the potty every hour is a problem? Do you work with a large group by yourself or is your bathroom upstairs? I only ask because we have two in our group that are potty training and we place them on the potty every 20-30 mins. One is age 2.5 and the other is not even 2 yet and both are doing great. Neither one really verbalizes when they need to go. We just watch for signs and sometimes watch the clock. They have been doing this for over 2 weeks now and they are both in underwear with rarely an accident. It does take ALOT of time and patience having to constantly do this but its a method that has worked for us. Just a thought.
I do not feel this is an effective way to potty train a child. How is placing a child on the potty 15-20x a day (every 30 min for a 10 hour day excluding nap...) going to potty train a child? This does not teach a child bladder control OR to verbalize the need to go. I place all children that are of the age/show readiness for potty training on the potty during transition times (after snacks, after lunch, before/after naps, etc.) and if they go - they go, if not, they don't and we go on about our day. It has nothing to do with my group size or ability to place a child on the potty every 20-30 minutes.
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Old 06-19-2014, 04:07 PM
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Originally Posted by TickleMonster View Post
I am a little lost as to why placing this child on the potty every hour is a problem? Do you work with a large group by yourself or is your bathroom upstairs? I only ask because we have two in our group that are potty training and we place them on the potty every 20-30 mins. One is age 2.5 and the other is not even 2 yet and both are doing great. Neither one really verbalizes when they need to go. We just watch for signs and sometimes watch the clock. They have been doing this for over 2 weeks now and they are both in underwear with rarely an accident. It does take ALOT of time and patience having to constantly do this but its a method that has worked for us. Just a thought.
Bringing a child to the bathroom at certain intervals is not effective for training IME.

Like you said, it takes ALOT of time and patience but honestly, those kids aren't trained...YOU are.

They have only been accident free because you are bringing them to the toilet every 20-30 minutes. Of course, they are at some point going with that much time on the toilet.

I could do the same thing with my 12 month old and at some point she'd probably go too... and if I was doing it every 20-30 minutes ...she wouldn't have an opportunity to have an accident...kwim?

But, with that said, if it works in your environment...great! I am NOT saying its wrong.

I've just spent way too many years doing child care that I don't agree that taking a child at certain intervals through out the day is effective.

IME, it takes a child LONGER to be trained when implementing that process.
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  #23  
Old 06-19-2014, 05:12 PM
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dcm asked how dcb did today with the potty watch and I told her that it was no different than any other day - however, he showed signs of distress today when other days he did not. He covered the watch so I could not hear it a couple times, he was distressed when he didn't want to go and it was "time" and when he did have an accident, he looked very guilty. I told her that if they're trying to train quickly before pre-k in the fall it may backfire and she just kinda blank stared me and then admitted that they have an interview at a preschool next week. -shrugs- just as I expected...
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Old 06-20-2014, 08:33 AM
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Everyone might not agree with our method but we have successfully potty trained 5 dck's within that two weeks and they are doing great. The other two are on the tail end of their two weeks.
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Old 06-20-2014, 08:40 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TickleMonster View Post
Everyone might not agree with our method but we have successfully potty trained 5 dck's within that two weeks and they are doing great. The other two are on the tail end of their two weeks.
That is the difference.

YOU are willing to do the work that I feel a parent should be doing.

One of my biggest operating principals is to not take over things I view a parental responsibility. The parenting philosophies of each family I enroll matters to me and has a deep impact on my over all program.
That's what works best for me.

I am not willing to devote the time it takes to bring a child to the bathroom every 20-30 minutes.

You yourself, said it is alot of work and requires a lot from you.

If you are willing to do all that, there isn't anything wrong with that.

You also said "we" and "our". I am assuming you have other staff available too?

If so, then your environment and abilities as far as what things you can and can't do vary greatly compared to those of us who work alone.

We all do what works best for us.
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Old 06-20-2014, 09:15 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TickleMonster View Post
Everyone might not agree with our method but we have successfully potty trained 5 dck's within that two weeks and they are doing great. The other two are on the tail end of their two weeks.
I'm glad it works for you guys...

However, this little boy is making me feel so sad for him today. The little boy who used to enjoy and willingly sit on the potty during transition times is now resistant, showing signs of distress during potty breaks, and gets very upset when I notice that he had an "accident". What a big change in the last 2 days that his parents decided he's going to need to use a potty watch and sit on the potty every 30-60 min.
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Old 06-20-2014, 10:33 AM
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Well apparently the dcp's weren't thrilled with my policy enforcement on the potty training issue because they gave notice that his last day will be July 31st.
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Old 06-20-2014, 11:23 AM
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Well apparently the dcp's weren't thrilled with my policy enforcement on the potty training issue because they gave notice that his last day will be July 31st.
So now this little guy will have to adjust to a new daycare AND then make the switch to Head Start too?

Poor little guy.

His potty training isn't going to improve. I think you are lucky that you are not going to be having him stay...I can already see the potty training issues being the start to bigger issues. I had one just like that. The parents were insistent the child train and he was not ready.

Now they have an anxiety ridden, stressed 4 yr old who is still in Pull ups....with NO signs of wanting to use the toilet anymore.

Sorry you are losing a family though.
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Old 06-20-2014, 11:30 AM
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So now this little guy will have to adjust to a new daycare AND then make the switch to Head Start too?

Poor little guy.

His potty training isn't going to improve. I think you are lucky that you are not going to be having him stay...I can already see the potty training issues being the start to bigger issues. I had one just like that. The parents were insistent the child train and he was not ready.

Now they have an anxiety ridden, stressed 4 yr old who is still in Pull ups....with NO signs of wanting to use the toilet anymore.

Sorry you are losing a family though.

Thank you. And I Agree - I think this is going to cause more issues, but nothing I can do about it. I'll miss the kid - I've had him since may 2013. But I've got a nice waiting list with many more inquiries so I'm not concerned about filling his spot...
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Old 06-20-2014, 11:43 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
That is the difference.

YOU are willing to do the work that I feel a parent should be doing.

One of my biggest operating principals is to not take over things I view a parental responsibility. The parenting philosophies of each family I enroll matters to me and has a deep impact on my over all program.
That's what works best for me.

I am not willing to devote the time it takes to bring a child to the bathroom every 20-30 minutes.

You yourself, said it is alot of work and requires a lot from you.

If you are willing to do all that, there isn't anything wrong with that.

You also said "we" and "our". I am assuming you have other staff available too?

If so, then your environment and abilities as far as what things you can and can't do vary greatly compared to those of us who work alone.

We all do what works best for us.
This is to Blackcat:
Its just myself and my Mother that run this daycare and we both contribute to the potty training. But thank you for all your input.
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Old 06-20-2014, 02:29 PM
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Quote:
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This is to Blackcat:
Its just myself and my Mother that run this daycare and we both contribute to the potty training. But thank you for all your input.
I feel like I should apologize...
I hope you didn't take my reply as one that was saying you shouldn't do what you do...

If you did take it that way, please know I didn't mean it that way at all.

I was only saying what has worked in my experience.

Definitely NOT dissing you for doing what works for you.

There are alot of things I won't do now that I used to do for years.

It's a journey for all of us and although we all might have the same goal, we have different factors that influence our choices in what services we offer and which ones we don't.

So again I wasn't trying to say you were wrong.
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  #32  
Old 06-21-2014, 07:24 PM
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I feel like I should apologize...
I hope you didn't take my reply as one that was saying you shouldn't do what you do...

If you did take it that way, please know I didn't mean it that way at all.

I was only saying what has worked in my experience.

Definitely NOT dissing you for doing what works for you.

There are alot of things I won't do now that I used to do for years.

It's a journey for all of us and although we all might have the same goal, we have different factors that influence our choices in what services we offer and which ones we don't.

So again I wasn't trying to say you were wrong.
Thank you. Yes I agree there also many things we used to do that we don't anymore. The longer your in this business the more you learn.
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Old 06-22-2014, 11:26 AM
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I recently had a DCG who's parents said she's Potty trained and does great at home blablabla! Put her in underwear and she peed all over my house and every set of clothes I had for her. it turned into the same pissing match about why she can't go here but goes at home. Dad brings her in a soggy diaper every morning from their 40 min drive to my house. That's NOT potty trained. DCG hardly talks at all, she merely swats at her nether-regions and/or whines when she has to go. If I could help her in time she would go, but she didn't take off the undies by herself or anything. I could also tell she was feeling guilty when she had an accident. I think at home she just runs around nudey bottom and goes on the potty when she can to get praise from mom and dad. She doesn't communicate that she needs to go, she doesn't go to the potty, she just stands there swatting herself.
I used a form similar to one above about communicating her need to go, being accident free in a PullUp for 2wks and such. We even tried again a couple weeks later when she said peepee and went but it was literally once and that was it. I finally put the potty away and said we're giving it a break here. She won't be 2 until Sept so it's not like she's even over due to learn. I never really considered the idea that they want to put her in preschool this fall and are pushing it now! LOL good riddance! I can deal with most of what they do but I'm not their biggest fans by any means. I think they are doing the new age parenting thing and treating her like a mini-adult when she isn't. They think being parents consists of modeling her after them and not learning who she is! Makes me sad.
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