Is there such a thing as a good term??? Some of these stories scare the beejeebers outta me. I hope I never have to go through what some of you have gone through. Dcproviders are a strong breed!

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I've been fortunate - I termed a family a couple of years ago. While it was awkward, it wasn't bad. The kids were very new to dc, the parents were kind of clueless about group care, etc. I did offer to help them find a new caregiver and was very positive with how I spoke of the kids (there weren't behavior issues to speak of, they were just very unhappy kids) They found a new person and with one on one care she was able to whip them into shape.

I'm sure the parents weren't thrilled, but we were all civil about it.

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What I consider "good Terms" are: ... when I convince the parents, that their child has outgrown my program, and would be happier among children of his/her age, or that there is someone out there, that would meet their needs better than I can.

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I have had one bad term.... over the dcb's behaviour and mom didn't take it well at all. I had had him on probation, offered some solutions, but in the end couldn't allow his aggression as it wasn't getting better but worse. And it didn't help that in the probation period she doped and dropped and then tried to bring him again visibly unwell and with a fever.

I had one okay term over behaviour and not following policies. I gave her the option of finishing the week. She told me she was pulling her immediately. Note to self: term immediately

However, I did have one good term. I had to tell a dcm that I couldn't watch her child any longer due to a nut allergy and we are a nut friendly house. (I am legally unliscensed so this is okay for me to do legally)

I gave her options of waiting it out (with child cared by someone else) until her test results came back or finding someone else permanently. She and dad decided to go elsewhere rather than wait (it was a few months wait).

We were both okay with that, she still offered to be a reference for me, and even wrote me a glowing letter of reference.

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I've only termed twice in the 12 years I have been doing childcare. Both ended well. I think in both cases the biggest factor was that there was open communication the entire time. We discussed what the issues were -one was a 9 m/o who did nothing but SCREAM at the top of his lungs the entire day regardless of whether he was being held or not - the other was a behavior issue where the child was 3 1/2 and was both defiant and violent and we were working with a behavior specialist. We talked daily about what was going on, what we were trying, what was or wasn't working, etc. When I knew it was going to end in termination, we started talking about a timeframe for improvements and what would happen if there wasn't.

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I have had a couple of really good terms.

One was a family who had a DCG 1.5 who kept biting my own DS. I sat down and chatted with DCM and told her that it just wasn't fair to him to have to hide from her all day in his own home. She just wasn't fitting in.
I apologized and told her how much I really loved DCG and that I was sad to see her go but that the two of them were just clashing too much.

I didn't even give her two weeks notice because it was a biting issue...she came over with last week's pay, thank you card in hand with a photo of DCG and a little angel pin (Babysitter's guardian angel) - it had a little poem on it about how special we are.

I still see and talk to her often (She lives a few houses down)

I had another term that ended okay. DCG was stealing from my home...DCM was convinced it was an anxiety thing.I tried to work with the family because DCM was so upset everytime I would even suggest terming. She would cry and beg me to keep trying for DCG's sake (They had just moved to the area and DCG was not adjusting well).Eventually DCG started carving her name on my furniture and being mean to the little ones. I called DCD to tell him and he said - So I assume this daycare dance is over then.

I said - Yes sir it is. You can come pick up right away, pay for this week's care and then we are done.

They were okay with it and DCM sent me a long email thanking me for how hard I had tried and how much she appreciated me.

DCG now bullies my DD at school daily....sigh But the term itself ended okay.

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I have had a few good terms. I started a baby and my daughter was removed from public school. Her being home put me over my numbers. The family is on my wait list for fall. Another family, mom lost her job and was brining him 1 day a week. After 2 months still no job so I told her that I had to look for a replacement. She found a job a few weeks ago and last Saturday asked to be put on my waiting list. They started Wednesday.

All my others have been bad and 4 completely horrid! One of them contacted me a few months later asking for her spot back, she over reacted. I told her no, still doesn't stop her from asking me to take him when he's sick or school is closed.

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