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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Those With More Than 3 Of Your Own Kids, HOW Do You Do It??
My4SunshineGirlsNY 10:47 AM 03-10-2011
I have 4 of my own kids...all girls ages 13, 11, 7, and 5....I have had 2 school daycare girls (ages 7 and 10) and a 2 (almost 3) year old daycare boy in my daycare for about 2 1/2 years. When it's just them everything seems to run rather smooth.

Every time I go to add someone new I struggle. Either there is a behavior issue or I just can't keep up with it all (feeding, cleaning, organizing, crafts). I see some of you have several toddlers....I'm just wondering how you keep up with it all if you have your own kids too???

I just added 2 girls a couple of weeks ago ages 2 (almost 3) and 4. I have been falling behind on EVERYTHING...I can't keep up with the messes, arguements, my laundry is slipping behind, and I feel like my house is always a mess...and when all my kids and school age daycare girls get home it's a nightmare!!

I have been struggling with the thought of shutting down daycare to get an out of the home job, but the thought of my 5 and 7 year old going to daycare is very hard for me......I'm just feeling like I'm failing this daycare job, but honestly I do the best I can..I'm only one person and wondering how you all cope with the high demand??
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DCMomOf3 10:58 AM 03-10-2011
Honestly, I find that it's just as hard as adding a new child to a family. the first few months are hard while you adjust, but then it equalizes and you function at the same level as you did before you added the last child.

You just have to learn how to function in a slightly different way.
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daycare 11:05 AM 03-10-2011
Originally Posted by My4SunshineGirlsNY:
I have 4 of my own kids...all girls ages 13, 11, 7, and 5....I have had 2 school daycare girls (ages 7 and 10) and a 2 (almost 3) year old daycare boy in my daycare for about 2 1/2 years. When it's just them everything seems to run rather smooth.

Every time I go to add someone new I struggle. Either there is a behavior issue or I just can't keep up with it all (feeding, cleaning, organizing, crafts). I see some of you have several toddlers....I'm just wondering how you keep up with it all if you have your own kids too???

I just added 2 girls a couple of weeks ago ages 2 (almost 3) and 4. I have been falling behind on EVERYTHING...I can't keep up with the messes, arguements, my laundry is slipping behind, and I feel like my house is always a mess...and when all my kids and school age daycare girls get home it's a nightmare!!

I have been struggling with the thought of shutting down daycare to get an out of the home job, but the thought of my 5 and 7 year old going to daycare is very hard for me......I'm just feeling like I'm failing this daycare job, but honestly I do the best I can..I'm only one person and wondering how you all cope with the high demand??
#1 your not failing...
#2 have a plan, set days that you will do laundry, cook dinner(s), eat left overs, who takes billy to T-ball and etc.
#3 everyone has a chore, no matter what age
#4 Dont stress if it does not get done right away.
#5 There is no arguing. If you don't want to help do something, you get nothing., This rule is for my older kids ages 13 and 15. You dont have to clean anything, but then you dont get anything. AND I mean anything. .
#6. Make time for youself. even if its a 10min walk around the block
#7 reward everyone in the house when you have a great day. maybe icecream after dinner or an extra 15 min of TV time.
#8 when things go crazy, don't let yourself go crazy. remove yourself and take time to refresh.
#9 no one is perfect, and as long as you are trying you will never fail.
#10 when everything falls apart, let it. Take your kids to the park let everyone destress and then come back to take care of matters later.

This is a list that I wrote for myself 2 years ago. I still have bad days and days where the kids try to challenge me, but in the end, as long as I remember the last 4 rules, I am always on top...........

Smiles and hugs, take a nice break today.....
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DBug 12:15 PM 03-10-2011
I prioritize the chores and delegate or ignore the rest. For example, the daycare areas and kitchen need to be cleaned several times a day, so that's the first priority. Mine and my daughter's laundry needs to be done, but my husband and sons are on their own for clean clothes. The kids' rooms are pig sties, but that's their own space so I'm okay with that. And I pick up in the bathrooms daily so that nothing builds up.

Homework is mainly Daddy's responsibility, but after-school activities tend to include all of us.

For the weekly cleaning, I have a cleaning lady (who is also a good friend of mine). Totally worth the money!

Saturdays are for de-cluttering (if we're not doing family stuff). I literally go through a room or cupboard or closet with a garbage bag and clear it out. The less junk we have, the less I have to clean or tidy up later!

But most importantly, I try to get as much work done during my 12-hour daycare day as possible (kitchen & playroom done while kids are playing, laundry during nap). Then when 6:00 rolls around, I can sit down and (hopefully) not have to move ... unless we're off to chauffer our own kids around!

But the thing is -- with kids, our house will never be spic and span for more than 10 minutes, and it's just exacerbated by having other people's kids here too! I just keep trying to remind myself that I'll miss that mess when the kids are grown and have moved out .
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MN Mom 12:47 PM 03-10-2011
Originally Posted by DBug:
I just keep trying to remind myself that I'll miss that mess when the kids are grown and have moved out .
I tell myself this at least 10 times each day...well that and the Serenity Prayer!
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Michelle 01:10 PM 03-10-2011
Dbug.... very well spoken, I wish I had said all that!!!
6 kids of my own 3 boys, 3 girls and we live in a state of organized kaos.

Hang in there , just for the fact that you are concerned about these things speaks volumes!!! some people just don't care and I have seen some daycares that are so dirty( I don't mean toys laying around) and the kids so neglected.

You are awesome to be there for your kids. The only advise I have to give is when your own kids get home from school, set aside 20 minutes to listen to them tell about their day. If you have to pop a dvd in for the other kids or bribe them with some yummy food, just do it. Your kids need to know that you are there for them and you have time to be with them .Because later they might resent the dck's ,you, or your decision to work at home.
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Rachel 12:16 AM 03-14-2011
Originally Posted by DBug:
I prioritize the chores and delegate or ignore the rest. For example, the daycare areas and kitchen need to be cleaned several times a day, so that's the first priority. Mine and my daughter's laundry needs to be done, but my husband and sons are on their own for clean clothes. The kids' rooms are pig sties, but that's their own space so I'm okay with that. And I pick up in the bathrooms daily so that nothing builds up.

Homework is mainly Daddy's responsibility, but after-school activities tend to include all of us.

For the weekly cleaning, I have a cleaning lady (who is also a good friend of mine). Totally worth the money!

Saturdays are for de-cluttering (if we're not doing family stuff). I literally go through a room or cupboard or closet with a garbage bag and clear it out. The less junk we have, the less I have to clean or tidy up later!

But most importantly, I try to get as much work done during my 12-hour daycare day as possible (kitchen & playroom done while kids are playing, laundry during nap). Then when 6:00 rolls around, I can sit down and (hopefully) not have to move ... unless we're off to chauffer our own kids around!

But the thing is -- with kids, our house will never be spic and span for more than 10 minutes, and it's just exacerbated by having other people's kids here too! I just keep trying to remind myself that I'll miss that mess when the kids are grown and have moved out .
Couldn't have said it better myself! I have two 7 year olds, an almost 6 year old, and a just turned 3 year old. Sometimes it's pretty nuts around here (and I'm not even doing daycare full time this year, starting in Sept. full time again), but mainly I just keep reminding myself that's it's only mess. If the kids are fed, (relatively)clean, happy & loved that's really the most important, the rest is icing on the cake!
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laundrymom 10:14 AM 03-14-2011
Its hard, I admit, but even if you dont get everything you wanted to done in a day,.. your kids are fed, happy and the roof is up. =-) having a perfectly clean house when raising children in a busy happy home is like nailing jello to the wall. =-)

Do you want a clean house, or a happy home? =-)
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daycare 11:16 AM 03-14-2011
Originally Posted by laundrymom:
Its hard, I admit, but even if you dont get everything you wanted to done in a day,.. your kids are fed, happy and the roof is up. =-) having a perfectly clean house when raising children in a busy happy home is like nailing jello to the wall. =-)

Do you want a clean house, or a happy home? =-)
like nailing jello to the wall. =-)
I have never heard that saying in all my life and love it!! lmao
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Live and Learn 11:18 AM 03-14-2011
Originally Posted by laundrymom:
=-) Do you want a clean house, or a happy home? =-)
Words to live by!
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laundrymom 11:18 AM 03-14-2011
Originally Posted by daycare:
like nailing jello to the wall. =-)
I have never heard that saying in all my life and love it!! lmao
lol,.. Im redneck,.. I have all kinds of sayings,..lol. stick around. =-)
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Tags:behavior problems, chaos, overwhelmed, serenity prayer
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