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Logged Out For Privacy 10:45 AM 11-11-2013
Regular member logged out for privacy.

I am a new provider. I've only been open for 6 weeks. The first week, a daycare family brought in Hand, Foot, and Mouth. My son got sick. Ever since then, he's had a horrible cold that he hasn't been able to shake. Last week, I checked on him during nap to discover that he was breathing like he was sprinting... gasping for breath in his sleep at a really rapid rate, little tummy moving in and out, NOT normal breathing for a child who is asleep. OR awake. I woke him up and took his fever. 103. By the time my husband got home 30 minutes later and brought him to Urgent Care, his fever was 105, and he had a low enough oxygen count to be transferred to a different hospital's ER by ambulance. I had daycare kids at home, but I asked parents to pick up early if possible. I explained what had happened. I ended up getting out 15 minutes earlier than normal. Then I went straight to the hospital. We were there until midnight getting X-rays and nebulizer treatments. We brought a nebulizer home, but had to fill the prescription at the all-night pharmacy and then do treatments every 4 hours all night long.

I was open the next morning at 7 AM. My husband stayed home to help with my son. When I went to get the kids after nap, I saw that one child had a diarrhea blow-out all over the Pack-N-Play. Now today my son has diarrhea. He still has a mild fever, still needs nebulizer treatments, still is miserable. And now this.

I feel like I just can't win here.

We wash our hands, I sanitize toys. My son does not put anything in his mouth, but most of the other kids do often. I have a "yuck bucket" that toys go into immediately if I see them getting licked. I have a good illness policy, too.

I opened this daycare to give my son the best. I didn't want to send him somewhere else for 10 hours, 5 days per week. But he keeps getting sick, and THAT'S not in his best interest.

And to top it off, on my way out the door to see my son in the ER, one daycare parent asks me if I can get the container of wipes they sent with their child two weeks ago. (I now am providing wipes because it's easier than have 6 types, and some of the varieties parents would send were flimsy and didn't hold up). Since I'm now providing wipes, she wanted to know if she could have the pack back. It's like an 100-count pack that cost probably $7 or $8. We'd already used quite a bit of it. I get saving money... I do... but dear God, cut me a break! I didn't call parents to come get their child immediately when I knew mine was in the ER. I just asked for them to pick up early if possible. I didn't close the next day even after the horrible night we had and the zero sleep I got. I'm trying to be fair here... but things like that... it just makes me feel unappreciated.

With the hospital bills, the X-rays, the ambulance, the nebulizer, the prescriptions... we have spent more money taking care of my son's daycare-caused illnesses than I have made in income.

I know kids get sick. But this has been so much. Do you think part of the reason it keeps happening is because all of my clients are part-time? They all either attend 3 days or 2 days. A few times now a parent has said, "my child had a fever earlier this week, but is better now" (or something like that). I don't know exactly what the symptoms were like because I haven't seen the child in awhile. They honestly could even be medicated, for as far as I know, to bring a fever down... how would I be able to tell? I don't see them every day, so it's hard to keep track of these symptoms and figure out who should be excluded and who shouldn't be... any thoughts?
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Play Care 10:51 AM 11-11-2013

I am sorry! I will say the first year or so we caught everything. It's just what happens when you open your home to others. That said, what is your illness policy? Are you enforcing it? Are you allowing people to bring kids back before the waiting period (24 or 48 hours depending on your contract) My first year or so I had no issue calling out sick if my kids or I were sick. IMO that's the chance they take with in home care. And if they are sending kids to me and hiding illness, I'm not too upset that it comes back to bite them, KWIM?
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Cradle2crayons 10:57 AM 11-11-2013
Originally Posted by Logged Out For Privacy:
Regular member logged out for privacy.

I am a new provider. I've only been open for 6 weeks. The first week, a daycare family brought in Hand, Foot, and Mouth. My son got sick. Ever since then, he's had a horrible cold that he hasn't been able to shake. Last week, I checked on him during nap to discover that he was breathing like he was sprinting... gasping for breath in his sleep at a really rapid rate, little tummy moving in and out, NOT normal breathing for a child who is asleep. OR awake. I woke him up and took his fever. 103. By the time my husband got home 30 minutes later and brought him to Urgent Care, his fever was 105, and he had a low enough oxygen count to be transferred to a different hospital's ER by ambulance. I had daycare kids at home, but I asked parents to pick up early if possible. I explained what had happened. I ended up getting out 15 minutes earlier than normal. Then I went straight to the hospital. We were there until midnight getting X-rays and nebulizer treatments. We brought a nebulizer home, but had to fill the prescription at the all-night pharmacy and then do treatments every 4 hours all night long.

I was open the next morning at 7 AM. My husband stayed home to help with my son. When I went to get the kids after nap, I saw that one child had a diarrhea blow-out all over the Pack-N-Play. Now today my son has diarrhea. He still has a mild fever, still needs nebulizer treatments, still is miserable. And now this.

I feel like I just can't win here.

We wash our hands, I sanitize toys. My son does not put anything in his mouth, but most of the other kids do often. I have a "yuck bucket" that toys go into immediately if I see them getting licked. I have a good illness policy, too.

I opened this daycare to give my son the best. I didn't want to send him somewhere else for 10 hours, 5 days per week. But he keeps getting sick, and THAT'S not in his best interest.

And to top it off, on my way out the door to see my son in the ER, one daycare parent asks me if I can get the container of wipes they sent with their child two weeks ago. (I now am providing wipes because it's easier than have 6 types, and some of the varieties parents would send were flimsy and didn't hold up). Since I'm now providing wipes, she wanted to know if she could have the pack back. It's like an 100-count pack that cost probably $7 or $8. We'd already used quite a bit of it. I get saving money... I do... but dear God, cut me a break! I didn't call parents to come get their child immediately when I knew mine was in the ER. I just asked for them to pick up early if possible. I didn't close the next day even after the horrible night we had and the zero sleep I got. I'm trying to be fair here... but things like that... it just makes me feel unappreciated.

With the hospital bills, the X-rays, the ambulance, the nebulizer, the prescriptions... we have spent more money taking care of my son's daycare-caused illnesses than I have made in income.

I know kids get sick. But this has been so much. Do you think part of the reason it keeps happening is because all of my clients are part-time? They all either attend 3 days or 2 days. A few times now a parent has said, "my child had a fever earlier this week, but is better now" (or something like that). I don't know exactly what the symptoms were like because I haven't seen the child in awhile. They honestly could even be medicated, for as far as I know, to bring a fever down... how would I be able to tell? I don't see them every day, so it's hard to keep track of these symptoms and figure out who should be excluded and who shouldn't be... any thoughts?
My first thought is that the diarrhea yur son has may be unrelated to the daycare boy. Chances are they gave your son some antibiotics in the ER or he's had some since and if so, that's a common side effect.

If he didn't have ANY antibiotics or meds that cause diarrhea, then it could simply be from the fever.

It sounds like you are doing everything right, but this time of the year is just when kids get sick more than normal.

it will get better!! If you vax though, I'd be sure, when he gets well, he gets a flu shot and be sure his pneumonia vax is up to date. Also, lots of vitamin c!! It helps!!

When this time of year rolls around, I buy cases of those cutie oranges and feed them to the kids like water lol. It seriously helps them get well if hey are sick and helps their immune system.
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racemom 11:26 AM 11-11-2013
I am sorry to hear your son is sick, but I am sure things will get better. When my son started kindergarten, after never being in daycare, I started working in a center. The first year I feel like we were sick more than not! After that first year neither of us gets sick very often, I think your son will build up his immune system and no longer get everything going! Hope he gets better soon!
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Angelsj 11:43 AM 11-11-2013
It is very normal to get things when you first open, when your child first attends daycare or when they start school. They are being exposed to a lot of germs they have not been exposed to before.
My only concern would be the age of your child. If he is under a year, he is going to be more worn down by these repeated illnesses than a child who is older.
I agree with C2C-- LOTS of oranges, and vitamin C. I feed them oranges and we give the Vitamin C gummies daily. The kids here get sick, but it usually goes away pretty quickly as well.

As to the diarrhea, try bananas and yogurt to solid him up and restore the good bacteria.
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Scout 11:50 AM 11-11-2013
Completely normal for your child to be catching everything! When my ds was a baby in a home dc, he had something every other week, I swear!! Believe it or not, it is good for him to get this stuff now to build up his immune system before school. I feel your frustration though!
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Rainbow 12:00 PM 11-11-2013
I first started watching a dc boy at the same time my oldest son started kindergarten (bringing in new germs from school) and over the winter/spring there was not one week that went by where someone (either myself, children, dc boy) was not sick. Every winter since then has been less illness than the previous winter.

I'm sorry your child had to go to the emergency room. I hope he is feeling better soon.
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TwinKristi 01:35 PM 11-11-2013
Last year was my first Winter opened doing DC and my kids and dh got everything!!! One of my sons has asthma and was almost hospitalized. He missed like 45 days of school last year from being soooooo sick.
One DCB has a sister in Preschool and I'm telling you, that school must be a cesspool of germs because she was getting her brother sick left and right who would bring it here and get all my family sick even if I did my best to separate them. It sucked! I managed to not get anything but the stomach bug that went around and was the first to get it of my family after DCB had it. His whole family had it, gave it to us, then we all had it over Christmas.
Even if you sanitize, wash hands, use your yucky bucket... it spreads by particulate when the child coughs. Anyone within 6' can catch it if they're not covering their mouth which we all know babies/toddlers don't do. Add to that slobbery mouths, sneezes... it's hard to contain. But once you build up immunities you will be healthier than anyone else! Again, this year I have DCKs who've been sick and I still haven't gotten sick. When I worked in childcare about 4-5 yrs ago I got horribly sick the first month I worked there and several times that year!!
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CrackerJacks 02:50 PM 11-11-2013
It will get better over time. The first year I was opened my daughter and I got sick (lots of colds and stomach bug) ALOT. Good news...Six years later and I get sick maybe 1x/yr and I don't think my daughter has been sick in over two years. You should take the time off, especially if your son is in the hospital.
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daycarediva 03:09 PM 11-11-2013
Originally Posted by Play Care:

I am sorry! I will say the first year or so we caught everything. It's just what happens when you open your home to others. That said, what is your illness policy? Are you enforcing it? Are you allowing people to bring kids back before the waiting period (24 or 48 hours depending on your contract) My first year or so I had no issue calling out sick if my kids or I were sick. IMO that's the chance they take with in home care. And if they are sending kids to me and hiding illness, I'm not too upset that it comes back to bite them, KWIM?
If your son was in someone else's daycare, he would be catching everything there. Babies in daycare, no matter how well they uphold their illness policy, no matter how much they clean and sanitize ARE going to be sick, especially in the first year.

My own two youngest grew up from babies in my daycare, and the first year they caught everything. After that, they are RARELY sick. We don't get sick anymore! Their immune systems are very good, thanks to daycare.

My cousin's child and my youngest both started K this year. Her daughter had never been to daycare, and she is SO SICK and has missed a TON of school already (over 20 days). She missed a week with a stomach virus. My son hasn't been sick at all.

I am so sorry that your son got so sick. I would make sure I had an iron clad health policy and enforced it.

I also would have closed the MINUTE my child was sick enough to go to the hospital, and I would have closed the following day as well.

Did you send home after the first bout of diarrhea? I absolutely would have.

As far as the Mom asking for wipes when you were on your way to the hospital, I would have laughed in her face, seriously. LAUGHED.

I also hope you are charging more for providing those items, as they DO add up significantly over a year. I supply everything here, I hate cheap items, and I raised my rates to reflect it.
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Heidi 03:55 PM 11-11-2013
Sorry to hear all that. What a lot of drama for you!

I agree with those that said that it's to be expected for now. Big shift in what everyone is exposed to.

You know something weird, though? I DONT sanitize...well, rarely. I wash things, make sure children wash their hands after using the bathroom. My sanitation methods here are "home clean", not institution clean, by a longshot.

In the past 2 1/2 years (since I started again), we've had a couple colds. That's all. I guess we're hardy Northern folk...

Seriously, I had a dcm tell me once, when I told her that a snowsuit at 50 degrees was overkill, that we are "sturdy stock". No, she said we "come from sturdier stock". This was 100% organic, vegan mom. Dear people, but we soon realized that although we really liked each other, we were not a "good fit".
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Heidi 03:58 PM 11-11-2013
Originally Posted by daycarediva:
If your son was in someone else's daycare, he would be catching everything there. Babies in daycare, no matter how well they uphold their illness policy, no matter how much they clean and sanitize ARE going to be sick, especially in the first year.

My own two youngest grew up from babies in my daycare, and the first year they caught everything. After that, they are RARELY sick. We don't get sick anymore! Their immune systems are very good, thanks to daycare.

My cousin's child and my youngest both started K this year. Her daughter had never been to daycare, and she is SO SICK and has missed a TON of school already (over 20 days). She missed a week with a stomach virus. My son hasn't been sick at all.

I am so sorry that your son got so sick. I would make sure I had an iron clad health policy and enforced it.


I also would have closed the MINUTE my child was sick enough to go to the hospital, and I would have closed the following day as well.

Did you send home after the first bout of diarrhea? I absolutely would have.

As far as the Mom asking for wipes when you were on your way to the hospital, I would have laughed in her face, seriously. LAUGHED.

I also hope you are charging more for providing those items, as they DO add up significantly over a year. I supply everything here, I hate cheap items, and I raised my rates to reflect it.


As far as wipes, I just tell everyone when we are running low, and they all bring a few boxes. One mother brought a whole case the last 2 times, though, so I don't think I will tell her when we run low next time. She's bought enough for the next 4 years..
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Play Care 04:09 PM 11-11-2013
Originally Posted by daycarediva:
If your son was in someone else's daycare, he would be catching everything there. Babies in daycare, no matter how well they uphold their illness policy, no matter how much they clean and sanitize ARE going to be sick, especially in the first year.

My own two youngest grew up from babies in my daycare, and the first year they caught everything. After that, they are RARELY sick. We don't get sick anymore! Their immune systems are very good, thanks to daycare.

My cousin's child and my youngest both started K this year. Her daughter had never been to daycare, and she is SO SICK and has missed a TON of school already (over 20 days). She missed a week with a stomach virus. My son hasn't been sick at all.

I am so sorry that your son got so sick. I would make sure I had an iron clad health policy and enforced it.

I also would have closed the MINUTE my child was sick enough to go to the hospital, and I would have closed the following day as well.

Did you send home after the first bout of diarrhea? I absolutely would have.

As far as the Mom asking for wipes when you were on your way to the hospital, I would have laughed in her face, seriously. LAUGHED.

I also hope you are charging more for providing those items, as they DO add up significantly over a year. I supply everything here, I hate cheap items, and I raised my rates to reflect it.

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MizzCheryl 04:30 PM 11-11-2013
Daycare is hard and you will be underappreciated.
The first thing you have to do is realize that you have to be stern and put your foot down. It would be great if all parents were considerate and thoughtful but they are not. Tell them what you want just like you would tell the children. When that rude parents asks about the wipes as you are headed out say I do not have time to do that right now.
Find your voice and use it!
Some will get in line others will pout or leave. You don't need them if they behave badly anyway.
When I started I wanted to accommodate everyone and wanted them to like me. After years of being run over I got over that.

Sickness is hard to deal with when your own children are young. You are blessed to have a husband that helps you.
It gets easier.
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Unregistered 08:32 PM 11-11-2013
This is the OP.

Thanks so much you guys. I really appreciate it.

Guess what... my son has developed Hand, Foot and Mouth blisters all over his body since I wrote the original post. This is in addition to the respiratory virus he had that sent him to the ER last week.

Second bout of H, F, and M in 6 weeks.

I just want to cry.
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Cradle2crayons 08:44 PM 11-11-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
This is the OP.

Thanks so much you guys. I really appreciate it.

Guess what... my son has developed Hand, Foot and Mouth blisters all over his body since I wrote the original post. This is in addition to the respiratory virus he had that sent him to the ER last week.

Second bout of H, F, and M in 6 weeks.

I just want to cry.
poor little guy!! His immune system is tanked right now. Be sure to get as much vitamin c as you can into him. Bless his heart !! And yours too!! It will get better although it doesn't seem that way right now.
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Heidi 05:57 AM 11-12-2013
poor buddy...and poor mom!
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AcornMama 06:18 AM 11-12-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
This is the OP.

Thanks so much you guys. I really appreciate it.

Guess what... my son has developed Hand, Foot and Mouth blisters all over his body since I wrote the original post. This is in addition to the respiratory virus he had that sent him to the ER last week.

Second bout of H, F, and M in 6 weeks.

I just want to cry.
Oh, I'm so sorry for you guys! Love on your little guy...take a minute and catch your breath. And follow your mama instincts. Praying for you guys.
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Unregistered 10:48 AM 11-12-2013
It's me again, OP.

I closed today and tomorrow. I am so glad I did... the kiddo needs some extra attention for a few days. I hope being open on Thursday will work out.
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cheerfuldom 06:51 AM 11-13-2013
I'm sorry you are having such a tough time with this. Honestly, if you are only keeping some part time kids, I would consider finding a part time job outside the home to help make ends meet and just close the daycare. It is very normal for kids the first year of daycare to be really sensitive to illness but even then, your son seems very sensitive. There may not be a light at the end of this tunnel for a long time, like a year. My kids have been in daycare in my home since birth and while they do get sick, it isnt very often and rarely ever severe. I almost never get sick. My second daughter was hospitalized one time as an infant for illness and the other three have never had anything severe yet. As for the wipes situation, you are just going to have to gain thicker skin. you cannot let yourself get offended so easily otherwise daycare is going to be a really big trial to you. The parent was asking for wipes back that they provided to the daycare and that you said, no longer need to be provided. It makes perfect sense that they would want any remainder back. I do think the whole illness situation will be tougher with part timers because like you said, there is no way for you to see for yourself who has been sick in previous days. Maybe taking fewer kids and only full timers would be a better scenario for you.
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MizzCheryl 05:08 PM 11-13-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
It's me again, OP.

I closed today and tomorrow. I am so glad I did... the kiddo needs some extra attention for a few days. I hope being open on Thursday will work out.
How is he doing?
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Unregistered 05:42 PM 11-13-2013
SO much better, thanks! I think we're back to normal now. I have my fingers crossed that we get a lull for awhile. I know the kids will get sick this winter, but the back-to-back severely contagious illnesses with hospitalization thrown in were just too much.
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Soccermom 09:37 AM 11-15-2013
Big hugs. I hope your little one is feeling much better now. It is the time of year for bugs and illnesses but on the bright side, all of this is helping to build your son's immune system in order for it to be strong for when he starts school.

Daycare is hard though, especially when you are working alone and your own children are ill but always remember that your family comes first. If they had gotten a call that their child was that ill, they would have sprinted from work to be with him.

Don't be afraid to put your foot down and stand up for your family. Trust me, you will soon come to realize that most DCF's don't really have the compassion for us that we assume they have. They will always put themselves first and unless you enforce your rules, they will trample all over you.

Don't be afraid to take time off when you really need it. Parents who have children in private care need to be prepared for things like this and have a backup plan in place.
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